what to feed our adopted newborn?? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 49 Old 01-01-2009, 10:06 PM
 
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Hello,
Thebirthmom we are matched with is due March. We have bio. children and adopted and do to thyroid issues etc I wasn't able to breastfeed past 5 weeks so I will be looking into donor milk, but realistically I will be using formula. Good Start worked well for my children as they had milk allergy, but Good Start still went well for them - they never had any problems on it. Before I do Good Start this time though I am going to try Baby's Only organic formula- they say it is for toddlers to encourage breastfeeding, but from what I understand it has the same vitamins amounts etc for newborns and many are using it forbabies and it is a good price(you could check out there website)I want to add also-and this is just my experience- but I tried making my own formula from home using the recipes from Weston with cow milk and goat milk and both of them really messed up my children digestion and it took 3 weeks for them to go back to being happy babies on Good Start formula. I think every baby is different though so it might work for you- it was just a lot of work and money and especially when it didn't work for my children. So when my children are 15 mos old I switch them successfully to raw goats milk and they do great. Just giving my opinion and experience and hope it helps. Blessings on your adoption journey- we are excited too, and it seems so far off waiting 3 more months, but I know the timing will be perfect in the end.
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#32 of 49 Old 01-01-2009, 10:29 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Momily View Post
Ouch. As another adoptive mom for whom inducing wasn't an option, I feel like I have developed a really thick skin to the implication that I run into here that giving birth a certain way (or at all) or bfing makes you "more" or "better" as a mama.

However, to come here, to a place for adoptive parents, and read that one's value as a parent is measured by how many of your stem cells are in a child hurts.

OP, I think that breastmilk is a wonderful thing to give a child, and if you have a way to make that happen, whether through donations or inducing lactation I'd jump at it. I have a child who probably would have benefited from breastmilk, as he had multiple medical needs. However, I also know that formula is not the end of the world. I also don't believe that breastfeeding is some magic tool for attachment, partially because I can see the warm wonderful strong bond my DS and I have despite bottlefeeding, tube feeding, and lots of complications along the way.

If I were in the situation you describe, with a limited stash of breastmilk, I'd probably exclusively feed as long as possible to preserve the virgin gut, and then when the stash is used up, move to formula. If new breastmilk came in while I was formula feeding I'd give that as much as I could. But that's just me, I haven't done a lot of research into the question because I wasn't in your situation.

I also have to say, I'm skeptical of the "Baby's Only" claim that their formula is the same as infant formula even though they haven't undergone the testing. If they were serious about not marketing to families with babies they would, presumably, choose a different name for their product. My guess is that the testing is expensive, or that it would require changes to their product. I myself would not consider it as option for a young infant. However, there are other organic formulas out there (there weren't when DS was little) that I would probably choose.
:

That was well said
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#33 of 49 Old 01-01-2009, 10:29 PM
 
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Depending on your state and how/when TPR is done there, you may have no/little say as to what the baby eats in the hospital and in interm care (if they have that). The baby will probably be started on the formula your state uses through WIC (usually a name brand, either Similac, Enfamil or GoodStart), and the birthmom will be given a supply to give to you. If the baby is tolerating it well, and you do decide to stick with formula, you could just continue to use what he/she is used to, or switch to the organic version of that brand. Some babies have a hard time switching around from various kinds of formula, so you may want to consider finding out what will be given in the hospital.
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#34 of 49 Old 01-02-2009, 03:08 AM
 
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Choosing your brand of formula is going to depend on the baby him/herself. Dfd started w/ Enfamil lipil in the hospital, but bmom and I suspect that she has a dairy intolerance, so I switched her to Similac soy. I would really prefer to try out Similac lactose-free, but here, WIC only pays for GoodStart, and they dont make that kind. The next can I buy will be GoodStart soy so that she can get used to it before WIC kicks in. Dfd is able to drink her moms breastmilk, too, so she is getting a half-and-half mixture.

Uhh, long story short, pick a basic kind and try it. If baby tolerates it well, you have your formula

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#35 of 49 Old 01-02-2009, 04:20 AM
 
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Not an adoptive mom, but birth mom, so that is why I was reading here, but you do have many options.

1. would be looking for another milk donor. You can change surrogacy websites for a donor. Many surrogates WANT to pump and the parents don't always want the milk. The shipping isn't always cheap, but when you compare it to formula and the long term benefits, it is worth it. I pumped for all of the children I delivered through surrogacy and the one that was adopted and even donated extra milk to twins locally who's mom had a very hard time producing enough milk for two babies.

Surrogates have been medically screened for more diseases then you will ever imagine, so the milk is SAFE.

2. inducing laction. Difficult, but for some can be done.

3. Formula. When I had to stop nursing my own son and he had to take formula, I used good start. It was easy on his tummy and it didn't stink as much. My ped used it for her own baby. The first surrogate kids I delivered were quadruplets and of course, I pumped for 3 months for them, but after that, i couldn't keep up with their demand (and I had to get back to my life) so their mom used the walmart brand (parents choice) she was a dr. herself and had great results with it.

I think the fact that you are willing to look at all the options is awesome.

Now I will say, when I gave my daughter up, I nursed her in the hospital and it was awesome for her and me. Not sure about your BM's situation, but it did work well for me. Of course, this child was not my first and she was given to a gay couple so really, they were PUSHING for her to nurse, and I am still considered her mom even though she isn't legally mine anymore. So it might be different then what you are comfortable with, but it worked for us.
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#36 of 49 Old 01-02-2009, 02:41 PM
 
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Please see our Sticky above for more info on this topic!

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=481793

Here is a piece from the first post that may also serve as a gentle reminder for those participating in this thread:

The purpose of this sticky is to share resources about feeding an adopted baby or toddler. Feeding can be a central activity around which attachment occurs in adoption. Secure attachment is essential to the emerging relationship in adoption. Parents and babies that are joined through adoption need to establish the attachment relationship and food (survival, trust) is a close way to do this.

Members need to know that there are adoptive parents that are seeking to establish adoptive breastfeeding and those that either cannot do this or haven’t been able to sustain it for one reason or another. Members should be supportive of one another and assume that the mother’s best efforts have already gone into any breastfeeding attempt, or that there are reasons that this is not an option that the member may not wish to explain. Resources on various methods of attachment-focused feeding are welcome here: induced lactation, herbal/medical supplements, supplemental feeding systems, best methods of “bottlenursing” and best bottles, how to help the baby that resists eye contact, organic formulas, formula and milk allergies, etc. In all posts please observe the User Agreement and keep in mind MDCs commitment to attachment parenting and natural family living. If there are resources that you are not sure are appropriate here, please PM the mod to check.

 
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#37 of 49 Old 01-02-2009, 11:03 PM
 
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If breastfeeding weren't an option, I'd go with the homemade formula too! Dh and I have talked about this because we hope to adopt.

As for gov't regulations in formula, I'd be wary of them. My dh works for a company that makes substances from milk and one of them is the protein for formula. The process by which they heat the milk and extract it uses toluene. There are still small parts per billion of toulene left in the final product. Toluene is a substance so toxic the EU has banned it form all cosmetics and some US cosmetic companies have followed suit. Dh thinks he has his client convinced that they need to remove it from the dairy protein substance. However, the FDA just did an audit of his company and didn't blink twice at the toluene. :Like vaccines and other issues, the gov't isn't always reliable on their standards

So because of that, because formula is not a whole food and I believe in whole foods, I'd make a homemade formula if I couldn't nurse the baby.

Good luck with whatever you find will work best for your family. Sounds like things are moving along quickly. How exciting!
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#38 of 49 Old 01-05-2009, 02:32 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Attached Mama View Post
As for gov't regulations in formula, I'd be wary of them. My dh works for a company that makes substances from milk and one of them is the protein for formula. The process by which they heat the milk and extract it uses toluene. There are still small parts per billion of toulene left in the final product. Toluene is a substance so toxic the EU has banned it form all cosmetics and some US cosmetic companies have followed suit.
I'm new to this forum and only have experience with bf my bio dd. We are hoping to adopt this year and I'm just beginning to look into adoptive feeding options. I know nothing about formulas so this is really helpful to know.
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#39 of 49 Old 01-05-2009, 10:39 PM
 
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Originally Posted by fruitfulmomma View Post
"so what type of formula is the next best thing??"

Not an adoptive parent here, but as an infant myself whose mother was unable to bf and who was extremely allergic to commercial formula, I am partial to the idea of using homemade formula. My kiddos have all been exclusively bf'ed but if I was ever in a situation where I couldn't my first choice would be for that.

You can find some recipes here... http://www.westonaprice.org/children/recipes.html and some FAQ's on using it here... http://www.westonaprice.org/children/formula-faqs.html

HTH,
Loving this. I believe I would do the same.

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#40 of 49 Old 01-08-2009, 03:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
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that sounds great...i think i'll really look into making my own if i can find a supportive and helpful pediatrician. thanks again! keep the ideas coming...

mom to 2 pooches, one wild and awesome little boy kid.gif who joined our family through the miracle of adoption, and expecting 2 miracle babies in spring 2013 after 7 years of ttc!belly.gif

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#41 of 49 Old 01-08-2009, 12:31 PM
 
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The idea of homemade formula really scares me. I'm really into homemade and natural when possible but I don't think food for children under one should be messed around with. I'd be worried that something would be off and brain development wouldn't be as great.

I haven't done a lot of research, though. Other than the Weston Price website. I do have my grandmother's old nursing book. It has a few old recipes for formula.
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#42 of 49 Old 01-08-2009, 01:01 PM
 
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While I think that homemade formula is an interesting concept, the recipes contain allergenic foods that concern me and could you actually get a baby to eat it?!? There are several strong flavored foods in the ingredient list. Fish oil and egg yolk (which will contain traces of the egg white no matter how good you separate) could be problematic in a large # of very young infants because of the amount relative to their size. And the recommendation to feed egg yolks at 4!!! months even if bf should not be followed!!! Finally, the liver part concerns me because even if it is good quality organic liver, the liver filters the bodies toxins, and they will be concentrated in it. There are so much environmental pollutants that there would be a high amount no matter what. My Mom, the closet hippie , fed me liver for health as a small child, but has said now that she would not and strongly encouraged me NOT to feed it to my kids for that reason. It also looks very time consuming to make, and I can't imagine doing all the work to make it and having enough time to bond effectively with a traumatized child. Heck, I was doing good to feed my family delivery pizza during parts of our early adoption experiences :

Commercial formula is not the best option, obviously bm is, but it is tested ,regulated, and with so many organic options I would certainly feel more comfortable with it. YMMV
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#43 of 49 Old 01-08-2009, 02:56 PM
 
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queencarr, this was exactly what happened to us in trying to do the homemade formula. It was so time consuming, my son did not like it, it was expensive!, he had to be allergic to at least one of the ingredients because I only tried it a couple of days and it took 3 weeks to get his digestion system calmed down, the ingredients were hard to find(the liver and all) and the list goes on... There might me a select few who can pull it off especially if they have no other children, but it is not for the faint in heart and it could end up hurting the baby's system.

Julie
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#44 of 49 Old 01-11-2009, 09:21 PM
 
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There are other sources for donated milk. I went to classes at a store run by a LC. They sold related accessories. They also kept a list of mommies who needed/had milk.

I donated milk on many occasions to a mommy with an adopted child. She managed to feed her baby bm exclusively for the first 6 months. She worked hard at it of course. I only found her after I had donated my largest supply to a milk bank.

Just an idea....

Also, if you are interested in inducing lactation and can't get the baby to latch on at first I thought I would share a success story. My cousin's baby wouldn't latch and she pumped and bottle fed for the first three months. She kept trying though and got the baby to latch at 4 months!! Never had another bottle.
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#45 of 49 Old 01-11-2009, 09:46 PM
 
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Congrats on your upcoming adoption! I would say to ask your Ped what formula they would recommend if that is what you want to do. I would not recommend making formula only becuse babies could be allergic to what is in it.

All the best!
Jen

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#46 of 49 Old 01-12-2009, 01:34 AM
 
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OP ~ I wanted to let you know that the current issue of Adoptive Families magazine has an article about feeding the adopted baby/toddler in their ages & stages section! Disclaimer: I have not been able to find this issue on local newsstands yet, so I have not read the article. I do regularly read this magazine and find it to be chock-full of v helpful adoptive and fostering info!

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#47 of 49 Old 01-12-2009, 03:58 AM
 
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I didn't adopt, but I had twin preemies and was unable to provide enough milk and had to supplement. I was afraid of the homemade formula at first, so I used different types of powdered infant formula... but around 5-6 months I switched to the formula and the change was profound. If your baby is getting donor milk in addition to the weston price formula, you can simplify it.

A lot of our parents were raised on canned milk, karo syrup and water... and although they add powdered vitamins and substitute milk fats and put it in a fancy container with a lable etc... it is still essentially the same thing... powdered milk, sugar and then you add water.

Use the raw milk, water, lactose, cream, and gelatine and then add in whatever supplements you are comfortable with as the baby gets older and you see how well she is doing. If she is getting breastmilk in addition, I wouldn't worry as much as long as she is growing well, pooping well, behaving well etc.

You can pm me with any questions, I was making the formula for over a year till I put my kids on straight raw goat's milk in addition to my milk and they did very well.
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#48 of 49 Old 01-12-2009, 02:03 PM
 
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I'm not an adoptive mama and I have never had to make this decision (we had two foster babies for two weeks each and fed them formula; I think it was Similac, but I'm not 100% sure). But I have two friends who were unable to breastfeed their babies beyond 6 months (in one situation the mama left, and the papa was alone with the baby, in the other situation the mama lost her supply completely after a serious illness) and both of them were quite successful in feeding their babies goat's milk. They both had goats and were able to feed it straight from the tap, so to speak. I have heard that goat's milk is closer to human milk than cow's milk is. I would, of course, recommend further research to find out what you might need to add to the goat's milk to make it more suitable for a human baby, but that's probably the path *I* would take if I were in your situation and needed to use something beyond donated breastmilk (and, since I've always wanted to keep goats, I'd probably go ahead and buy a goat for the milk ).

Lex

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#49 of 49 Old 01-12-2009, 02:17 PM
 
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I am a foster to adopt mom of 4, 2 of which I adopted. Three arrived to us as newborns, 5 days, 2 days and 3 weeks. I wished to nurse my first one but didn't have enough information available to me. I formula feed them all and they are smart intelligent little kiddos now. you need to do what you feel right and are able to do. As for your original question we used Nestle Good Start for the first , the second was lactose intolerant and had to drink Allimentum, the third was intolerant to everything and was placed on Neocate. So maybe you will be able to feed what ever but maybe you should wait to see what works the best. Good Luck with the adoption as it itself is one of the most rewarding things our family has ever done.
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