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You have to have a homestudy and be certified to adopt. That will need to be done by an agency. Ours cost $1,000. We then listed on parentprofiles.com, advertised on craigslist, university newspapers, cafemom.com, and sent letters to obstetricians around our state. We were called by an ob about a just born baby. (I am nursing her as i type one-handed.)
Our total costs were around $7,000. If we'd needed to advertise more, our costs would have gone up. We offered the birthmom $1,000 for living expenses, which is the most our state allows.
I haven't read the sticky here, but I think it has good info. You can learn about adoptive nursing at www.asklenore.com. You can get donor breastmilk at www.milkshare.com
ETA: There is currently a tax credit of about $11,000 towards adoption expenses. As long as you would have paid that much in taxes, you can write off that amount. You can spread it over 5 years. We got back $4,000 of our expenses this year. I read one person thought these might go away, but I don't know if that's true.
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