Nursing an adopted toddler - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 04:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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just sitting here at the beginning of my re-lactation journey, and faced with a few questions...

Our scenario will go something like this... when our little girl is about 20-22 months old (in about 4 months) I will fly to Africa to (hopefully!!!) bring her home. We will be there for 4-6 weeks together, all by ourselves, with lots of time to bond and get to know each other before we fly home to dad and big sister and brother.

I have time to do a pretty good protocol, I think, and managed to pump about 2 oz/day after only a few weeks of meds and sporadic pumping until our last adoption was clearly not going to happen, so I know that it can happen for me. I also nursed our two bio kids for 4 years each, so that is a factor to some degree...

Nutritionally I know that even if she doesn't ever actually nurse, I can feed her my EBM and that will be beneficial in it's own way, and that makes me feel like I should go ahead and try to re-lactate for her.

but my biggest concern is this... what if I take bcp's and dom and herbs and pump like crazy and lug a breastpump to africa and get there and find that she isn't going to want to nurse at our first meeting or anytime soon thereafter -- I'm afraid that the amount of time I have to spend pumping will negatively affect our attachment -- not to mention that she will probably wonder what the he!! the crazy white lady is DOING!!!! So if I can't pump there very much (probably only while she is sleeping), surely any progress I would make would diminish rapidly... and really, for a nearly two year old, there are certainly *almost* equally nutritious food and drink that she can have, so it isn't really about the nutrition...

I'm not sure if she still uses a bottle, but we could do skin-to-skin bottlenursing if she will take one... co-sleeping, an entire month together with not much else going on, wearing her as much as possible... it's not cut-and-dried, and I know nobody can answer this for me, but I was hoping to hear from anyone who has introduced nursing to a toddler (zombie? ) and anyone who has adopted a toddler and has an opinion, really...

also, from induced lactation mamas, with the amount of time I have before going to get her, what do you think will happen to my supply in the month or so that I'll probably only be able to pump a few times a day, as it will likely take a few months to get her to nurse... We'll also have to make a special effort to be around nursing mamas -- we're new in our area and I only know one so far...

If you've made it through my rambling thoughts so far, thank you for reading, and I await your wisdom!!

I would love to have nursing

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

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#2 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 10:44 AM
 
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Here are my thoughts, which are likely very different than most people's since I've never nursed anyone. I have, however, worked with at-risk infants, toddlers, and preschoolers in various capacities for about half of my career. I also don't know much about Africa.

But here it goes. You didn't say if the child was just separated from her mother or if she's been in institutionalized care. But if she hasn't had a nursing relationship, I wouldn't expect her to welcome that from a stranger. My son was 22-months-old when he went into foster care (although he came to me a few months later.) I knew him a little bit, and I know that he would have thought you were absolutely crazy and probably would have considered it a violation of his personal space. Thinking back six months to when my FD was 20 months, I don't think that would have been accepted, either. She never would have been still for that. She'd been drinking out of a cup for months, by then. She's not even a lap sitter. Even bottle nursing would probably not be for her, if initiated at that time.
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#3 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 12:56 PM
 
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Tiffani, you know I have the highest level of commitment to adoptive nursing. When we heard about an 8 month old that might be available, I started taking domperidone and talking to other moms on www.asklenore.com about how they got their older infants to nurse and they had some good suggestions based on their successes.

I do not remember anyone trying with an almost 2 year old. I know several mamas whose around 2 year olds self-weaned during pregnancy. Those toddlers did not want to start nursing again when the milk came back in with the birth of the babies (though I've read of toddlers who did restart the nursing relationship.)

So I am less than optimistic such an old child would want to nurse. That's not to say that it's not possible, I just don't know how much emotional energy I would put into it. I think the pp is right to find out what the toddler's nursing history is. If it was recently weaned, that might work. And certainly bottle or cup feeding your EBM would be great. My 3 year old doesn't get all that much milk each day, but he very rarely catches colds from my husband and never from the baby, so the antibody benefit is great.

I do remember hearing of a toddler that watched the biosibling nurse and started nursing from that. It doesn't sound like you're still nursing anyone else, but if you are that could make a difference.

If you want to be gungho and give it a try, you could succeed. You just never know what might happen. Maybe when you get home your baby could watch other toddlers nurse and be inspired. I just wouldn't get too disappointed if this doesn't work (a bit disappointed is understandable, but don't go overboard on the hard emotions.)

Have you asked at www.asklenore.com? I think you get a bigger pool of experienced adoptive nursing mamas there.

Created an instant family (7/89 and 5/91) in 1997. Made a baby boy 12/05 adopted a baby girl 8/08. Ask me about tandem adoptive nursing. Now living as gluten, dairy, cane sugar, and tomato free vegetarians. Homeschooling and loving it.

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#4 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 05:16 PM
 
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My adopted son was almost 23 months old when we got him. I wanted to try to nurse him, but decided to wait a few months for him to adjust first. I nursed his younger sister very frequently in front of him to get him used to the idea. Only a few weeks in, I was nursing his sister when he got very upset. I asked him if he wanted to nurse too. The tears immediately stopped. He nodded that he did want to nurse. I had him come over and try to nurse. He was a little confused about what to do so I told him to suck on it like a bottle. That was helpful. It took months to get the latch right, but I really didn't put that much effort into it. It is a year later and he is still nursing about once a day. He would nurse ALL DAY if I would let him. It has been extremely helpful for attachment. I hope this is helpful. My impression is that in Africa people are much more knowledgeable and supportive of breastfeeding than in America. I think you should be able to find someone there who would let your child watch them nurse their baby. As for the breast pump, my son watched me use it and it didn't freak him out at all. He wanted to play with it. I am pretty sure that he had NEVER been nursed before.
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#5 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 05:37 PM
 
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Originally Posted by zombie View Post
My adopted son was almost 23 months old when we got him. I wanted to try to nurse him, but decided to wait a few months for him to adjust first. I nursed his younger sister very frequently in front of him to get him used to the idea. Only a few weeks in, I was nursing his sister when he got very upset. I asked him if he wanted to nurse too. The tears immediately stopped. He nodded that he did want to nurse. I had him come over and try to nurse. He was a little confused about what to do so I told him to suck on it like a bottle. That was helpful. It took months to get the latch right, but I really didn't put that much effort into it. It is a year later and he is still nursing about once a day. He would nurse ALL DAY if I would let him. It has been extremely helpful for attachment. I hope this is helpful. My impression is that in Africa people are much more knowledgeable and supportive of breastfeeding than in America. I think you should be able to find someone there who would let your child watch them nurse their baby. As for the breast pump, my son watched me use it and it didn't freak him out at all. He wanted to play with it. I am pretty sure that he had NEVER been nursed before.
This is a nice story and I'm glad to read it. Tiffani, forget all us naysayers and go for it. I think the key is having another child your toddler can watch.

Created an instant family (7/89 and 5/91) in 1997. Made a baby boy 12/05 adopted a baby girl 8/08. Ask me about tandem adoptive nursing. Now living as gluten, dairy, cane sugar, and tomato free vegetarians. Homeschooling and loving it.

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#6 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 06:03 PM
 
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Wow! I did not know you had already chosen your program. I will have to go back and read some posts to learn about your adoption (haven't been on in a while). I don't have any good advice though there was an article in LLL's New Beginnings magazine about a year ago about an adoptive mom who breastfed her toddler. I've never had luck finding links to New Beginning articles online though.

I hope it works out for you. I will be expressing milk for our two if they EVER get to come home.
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#7 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 07:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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oh, candm, ... still no word? I did post a thread about what program we are using (indy) when I was first wondering about it, but things have moved really quickly and I haven't wanted to say online the name of the country again, because I'm paranoid like that. I will say, though, that it is in Africa, and theoretically *should* go according to plan, but there are no guarantees. I will go there for court and stay for about 4-6 weeks, and there is still a chance that it won't happen, but we're optimistic! :

I did find an article on LLLI about a woman who nursed her adopted toddler, but she was 10 months at homecoming and started nursing around 19 months. My fear is that because it will take (probably) several months for her to be comfortable enough with me to nurse, I can't imagine trying to pump every 3 hours to keep my supply up, and with a child that old, I doubt a lact-aid would really be all that appealing... we aren't around nurslings all that often, so would have to make an effort to seek them out. While in Africa, I'm not sure I would feel comfortable letting anyone know I was planning to nurse her -- they may think it was great, or they may think it totally unacceptable... probably positive reactions, but it's hard to say... I don't think she has ever nursed, or if she has, it was long ago and for a brief time...

The thing is, I know there are ways we can bond just as well, and that there are ways to get all the nutrition she needs into her little body, but I also kind of feel like maybe I should at least give it a try... at the same time, if it's highly unlikely that she'll go for it in the first two months, I can't imagine keeping up pumping while trying to parent her along with my other two kids for very long... if she were younger I would make more of an effort, but her advanced age along with the fact that she will rarely see other kids nurse makes me feel like it might all be for nothing, ya know? Plus I will be paying for the (expensive here in NZ) pump plus dom out of pocket, whereas in canada it was free... OH~CA~NA~DA

I really appreciate all the replies so far, and welcome more of them as I sift through it all...

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

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#8 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 10:06 PM
 
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When I got my son, I called LLL about how to get a toddler to nurse. They gave me a long article about it. Evidently, in Australia, children can't be adopted until they are 3 years old (It's been a while so I may screw up the details) and a lot of women were able to nurse their adopted 3-year-olds. If you call LLL they may be able to find the info for you. If you don't have luck with your local LLL, I can try to find the contact info for the LLL leader who gave me the info initially.

If you can't have your child watch people nurse, could you find videos of kids nursing for your child to watch? That might be almost as good.

ETA: I also thought that it would take months for him to be comfortable enough to nurse, but it was only about 2-3 weeks.
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#9 of 20 Old 05-05-2009, 11:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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thank you zombie, that's really helpful. I kind of feel like I may as well give it a shot, and if it doesn't work for whatever reason, then no harm done... I'm only going to do the bcp's for a short time, and the dom did make me gain a bit of weight, but not enough to really worry about. I'll just try to be more active this time around, and I'm sure having a toddler will help with that!

my doctor is trying to find out about prescribing more than the recommended 80 mgs, though I think it will help that I've already taken up to 120mgs for a few months with no adverse effects, though she seemed to initially feel that she just "couldn't" do it, even if she wanted to... we shall see...

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

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#10 of 20 Old 05-06-2009, 12:12 AM
 
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Jack Newman says you can go up to 160mg a day. http://www.nbcionline.org/index.php?...tion&Itemid=17

I did that. I did 50 mg in am and bedtime and 60mg in the afternoon. I found that I was never tired (haven't been no matter how many times my baby got up during the night.) However, if I was just sitting still, I would fall asleep. I did that once at a red light. Once I was able to wean to 140 mg, that went away. I'm now at 120 mg and don't have any issues with that.

I do think the 160 mg is considered an extreme dose and that 120mg is a preferred top dose. That is just my interpretation.

Have you tried Motherlove's More Milk Special Blend? It's got goat's rue. That helped increase my supply above what the domperidone 160mg did by itself.

Created an instant family (7/89 and 5/91) in 1997. Made a baby boy 12/05 adopted a baby girl 8/08. Ask me about tandem adoptive nursing. Now living as gluten, dairy, cane sugar, and tomato free vegetarians. Homeschooling and loving it.

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#11 of 20 Old 05-06-2009, 12:16 AM
 
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Our daughter was 10 months when we started trying to nurse...behaviors-wise, she was very toddlerish at that age.

One of the best tricks I've heard, which might already have been mentioned, was putting maple syrup on the nipple to encourage a child to suck it off.

In the end it didn't work for us. Her homecoming was incredibly stressful and bonding was way, way, WAAAAAAY more important than nursing...so I quickly gave up the pumping time in order to gain sleep/bonding time and a teensy weensy bit more sanity.

If her arrival had been less crazy, though, I think I would have continued. At the time she came home, I was able to get about 1-2 oz. at each pumping session. I didn't take anything, just started pumping at the tail end of weaning our son (age 2.5) and used the pump at least 4-5 times daily.

RedOak ~ Momma to DS (8) , DS (4) , DD (3) , & DD 9/10 ~
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#12 of 20 Old 05-06-2009, 12:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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160?!?! dang! I had heard 120, but I think I actually never took more than 90, though I may have taken 120... I think I could easily get 90 prescribed, and that might work for just trying to make enough to entice a toddler to comfort nurse, rather than trying to meet the nutritional needs of an infant...

In any case, I don't think I have anything to lose by trying, ya know? On the other hand, if I get there and with all that one-on-one time we really click and I find I would have had time to pump and I hadn't prepared at all, I might kick myself... so, I'm going to go for it, and whatever will be will be...


We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

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#13 of 20 Old 05-06-2009, 12:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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oh, and about herbs... I was just talking to someone who breastfed her adopted dd from birth, and she was working with a lactation consultant who felt that the dried herbs (fenugreek and blessed thistle are the ones she is using) in capsule form was the most effective way to go -- anyone have an opinion on that?

I used a tincture previously, and had meant to order the motherlove more milk special blend, but I wasn't a fan of the tincture, and would rather do capsules if it's equally or possibly more effective...

and thankfully I like oatmeal now

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

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#14 of 20 Old 05-10-2009, 03:04 AM
 
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While I have no experience, I personally believe you should go for it, but with an open mind. If it just doesn't work out once you get there, let it go without fretting. You don't need anymore stress on your fragile union. I like the suggestion to try and let the child watch another mother nurse her baby or toddler. This may help. Good luck!

Wow Zombie, you adopted an older child while have a baby? It never occurred that anyone did that. How interesting!

About adoption: If I am still nursing my daughter at 3-4 years and adopt a baby/toddler, will it help that I am still nursing for my milk to come in or will it be just the same as starting dry? I imagine I will have to supplement with something but I do not know how that would work as we are vegan and I do not believe soy formula is all that healthy as soy is an allergen (it is in our diet, but I will feel wary giving it to an infant). Maybe rice formula?

Also, if I want to have a baby by the time my daughter is four or five (now 8 mos), when should I start the adoption process? We are open to interracial adoption and limited special needs (no serious medical issues that would have us in hospital all the time or sexual or serious physical abuse as I would be afraid the child might inflict harm on my daughter).

Thanks all,
Grace
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#15 of 20 Old 05-10-2009, 07:15 AM
 
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About adoption: If I am still nursing my daughter at 3-4 years and adopt a baby/toddler, will it help that I am still nursing for my milk to come in or will it be just the same as starting dry?
I have no experience in adoptive breastfeeding (because #1 it isn't allowed when your kids are still in foster care in many states, and #2 neither of my kids were willing to try), but from the other adoptive mamas I know, relactating is easier than inducing lactation without ever having done it before...if you are actually producing milk at the moment you start, yes, yes, yes, it will all be much easier. You will just need to increase your supply, which in the case you've described, is probably most effectively acheived just by nursing your new babe extremely frequently. Your milk will also most likely change substance once you've got that new nursing babe.

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I imagine I will have to supplement with something but I do not know how that would work as we are vegan and I do not believe soy formula is all that healthy as soy is an allergen (it is in our diet, but I will feel wary giving it to an infant). Maybe rice formula?
You might not actually have to supplement in the situation you described. It depends how quickly your body can start producing more milk. Milk production is generally a supply-demand thing. You produce more if you are nursing more. With a toddler/preschooler, you won't be producing a ton largely because she won't be nursing a ton. But once you get a babe in the mix, you'll be nursing more, and your body will most likely rev up production to the baby level.

The problem with supplementing is that it reduces the breastmilk "demand," as in any time you have the baby on a bottle, s/he is not on the breast...which might lead to a cycle of lower production thus the need to supplement more. If you are still nursing your older daughter, and your body is producing some milk, I wouldn't start out with supplementation in mind at all. I'd just make sure I was nursing the babe as frequently as possible for as long as possible.

Quote:
Also, if I want to have a baby by the time my daughter is four or five (now 8 mos), when should I start the adoption process? We are open to interracial adoption and limited special needs (no serious medical issues that would have us in hospital all the time or sexual or serious physical abuse as I would be afraid the child might inflict harm on my daughter).
It depends a great deal on the program, and even then, it can be unpredictable. I'll just share how long it took for us...

We were already licensed foster parents when we got started. We started our paperwork for foster-adoption in the spring of 2004. I can't remember when we finally got through all the paperwork (the state we were in was VERY heavy on paperwork), but it had to have been sometime that summer or fall.

Our homestudy (actually in our state, it was really two homestudies...one for foster care, since we were transferring our license to the department, and one for adoption...that's how they do foster-adoptions there) happened in winter of 2004-2005. Our foster license and a signed-off copy of our homestudy arrived in the mail at the end of January of 2005. We were foster licensed for kids 0-9 and had an adoptive homestudy for kids 0-6, though we stated a preference for adopting a kid 0-3 years old.

In March 2005 we received a short-term foster placement (not any intention of adoption). She went back home in late March or early April...just a month later. This seemed to get our names circulating among the staff at the department, and a week or two later, ds (then dfs) was placed with us. He was newborn, but with a complex birthfamily history. He was still in the special care nursery at the hospital when placed.

His case went through very quickly, and we adopted him 13 months later when he was 13 months old. When he was 17 months, we just started to *talk* about adopting again. We went to one of the foster family picnics, and apparently our names started circulating again. Just a short while after the picnic, we got an unexpected call and dd (then dfd) was placed with us. She was six months old. It took about three years for her adoption to be finalized.

You may want to do a search on this topic in this forum. Periodically people have asked this same question, and a lot of folks have shared their stories.

I'm pro-adoption reform, but not anti-adoption.
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#16 of 20 Old 05-10-2009, 12:35 PM
 
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Sierra, you obviously know a lot about biological nursing. Adoptive nursing does NOT fall under the same rules. I have been adoptive nursing for 9 months (today, as a matter of fact, she is 9 months.) It is a very hard, expensive, frustrating, and very, very rewarding experience.

BellaRose0212, here is some info on my adoptive nursing journey. I seem to have had better luck than most other moms here so I feel ok saying I know a lot about this. Although some women can put a baby to breast and get to full supply even though they've never been pregnant, that is more common in other cultures than ours. The way we are raised sets up our minds that we just don't have the success other cultures do. I went into adoptive nursing with a totally positive, in your face attitude. I have done really well, but it wasn't easy.

I started pumping when my son was 21 months to try and maintain my supply. It can actually be harder to adoptive nurse when you are doing a natural weaning because your body is taking away a lot of the milk making tissue. If you have never been pregnant or are not currently nursing, you can do the newman protocol and trick your body into nursing, but since part of the protocol is to take birth control pills, I did not want to do that while nursing. I highly recommend www.asklenore.com for adoptive nursing info.

I pumped for almost a year before we got our daughter. It was complicated because I have high lipase and had to scald my milk to keep it sweet tasting. A couple months before our daughter was born we heard of a 6 month old so I started taking domperidone to increase my supply and stayed on it when that fell through.

It was a trial and error kind of thing. What I ended up doing after we got our daughter was 160mg domperidone a day (that is a high dose) along with Motherlove's More Milk Special Blend (herbs plus goat's rue.) The supply and demand feature does not work for me as it did when my bioson was little. I have now been able to wean myself down to 120mg dom a day. When I weaned to 110, that's one pill less a day, I had to supplement. I also tried weaning off the goat's rue while still taking the herbs and I had to supplement, so I'm back on the goat's rue.

As far as supplementing, I initially used milk I had frozen while we were waiting. That got me through to 5 months. (I lost 75% of my milk when the freezer was left open a crack while we were out of town. We now have a $5 appliance lock on it. It just adhesive tapes to the freezer. It acts as a reminder to make sure the freezer is shut.) At 5 months I started supplementing with donor milk I got at www.milkshare.com. I give the milk via a lactaid http://www.lact-aid.com/ It has a small tube that goes into the babies mouth. You still get the stimulation from nursing while the baby gets the extra milk. Do not even try to adoptive nurse without a supplementation plan until you know how good your supply will be. Your baby could end up starving while you mess around trying to increase your supply.

Here is an adoptive nursing tribe:http://www.mothering.com/discussions...light=adoptive Frankly, towards the end it became me trying to provide my journey for other moms to use as a reference.

One thing to be prepared for is the emotional roller coaster. It is genetic that we freak out if we are not at full supply. Our bodies know our babies will die if we can't produce enough milk. So even though I only needed to supplement with a few ounces a day, I had a period of terrible grief as I tried to come to terms with that. Here is the thread: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...optive+regrets

I have been tandem nursing my now 3.3 year old and my baby. They have never shared a cold. Tandem nursing is also hard because the older child wants to fidget with the younger child when you're trying to get the baby to sleep. Adoptive tandem nursing is even harder because you have an older nursling that just wants comfort from mom, but every suck is taking away fresh milk from the baby. I had to limit my son to night nursing (I usually have enough milk for the baby during the night) or after the baby had just finished nursing. I did not wean him in the early days because he was keeping my milk supply up while the baby grew into it.

Let me know if you have any more questions.

ETA: domperidone can not be bought in the US. You can get it by prescription from Canada or without prescription over the internet from somewhere in the South Seas. Although the Canadian prescriptions are more expensive, I found they work better. I pay over $80 a month for that and I think $30 for the more milk special blend. However, I bulk ordered a lot last year so I don't remember exactly how much I bought. I did save money because I bulk ordered and saved on shipping.

Created an instant family (7/89 and 5/91) in 1997. Made a baby boy 12/05 adopted a baby girl 8/08. Ask me about tandem adoptive nursing. Now living as gluten, dairy, cane sugar, and tomato free vegetarians. Homeschooling and loving it.

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#17 of 20 Old 05-10-2009, 01:22 PM
 
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mybabysmama, thanks for your really detailed post!

This was very helpful for me, as the moms I have known who have tried to lactate without having done it before have reported little overall milk production (though at least for one, an otherwise very fulfilling breastfeeding experience...I can't recall if she used the supplemental nurser or bottlenursed for supplementation), and the only moms I know who have said they've been able to adoptive breastfeed and get much supply have been moms who were already lactating for older children. I had no idea it was harder for this latter category of women.

I'm pro-adoption reform, but not anti-adoption.
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#18 of 20 Old 05-10-2009, 04:02 PM
 
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Before I became a mother, I was a nanny for a baby girl who had been adopted from China. She was nearly 18 months old when she came home. Her mother (a single woman in her mid-40s who had never had children before) did not attempt to induce lactation, or intend to nurse her daughter in any way. But after just a few weeks, her baby was trying to nurse. Once she had language (a few months later), she would ask to "try." It was never about nutrition, and there was never any milk, but her mother would let her comfort nurse when she asked.

I think it's important in any adoptive nursing situation to be clear that the outcome may not be what you're hoping for--and for that to be OK--but I certainly see no reason to give up before you've begun. Anything is possible.

Good luck!

Lex

Mindfully mothering SIX kids (ages 4, 5, 7, 8, 11 & 11) in a small house with a lot of love.
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#19 of 20 Old 05-11-2009, 12:29 AM
 
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Thanks Sierra and mybabysmomma for the input. Ah, it all seems so complicated, I honestly do not know where we will end up. I will be doing more research for a long while.

Thanks again!
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#20 of 20 Old 05-11-2009, 02:39 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BellaRose0212 View Post
Thanks Sierra and mybabysmomma for the input. Ah, it all seems so complicated, I honestly do not know where we will end up. I will be doing more research for a long while.

Thanks again!
It doesn't have to be that complicated. I wanted to be at full supply and was driven to try all kinds of stuff. I know someone who did that with her first adopted baby and didn't have the success I did. For her second adopted baby, she did not try to make any milk herself. Instead she used donor breastmilk and a lactaid. Her baby got every benefit of breastfeeding except antibodies to what she was currently exposed to. That's a tremendous gift without a lot of complications. The mom did have to find a lot of donor milk, and they had the ability to get it brought into state--something that can be quite expensive, but she did it.

LLL has a book: http://www.amazon.com/Breastfeeding-...2020359&sr=8-1 Start by reading that and reading at www.asklenore.com. Those two sources should be enough to start you on your journey.

Created an instant family (7/89 and 5/91) in 1997. Made a baby boy 12/05 adopted a baby girl 8/08. Ask me about tandem adoptive nursing. Now living as gluten, dairy, cane sugar, and tomato free vegetarians. Homeschooling and loving it.

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