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#1 of 5 Old 01-05-2012, 05:11 PM - Thread Starter
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We are aware of siblings who are in the care of a relative who won't be able to care for them much longer.  The state has custody, but we aren't sure if parental rights have been terminated or not.  If we wanted to adopt, do you think this would go through the state?  Is there a way to adopt specific children through the state or is the only possibility that we apply to adopt & then they match us with a child/children?  

-Shannon, momma to H reading.gif 8/03, N heartbeat.gif 9/06, & P homebirth.jpg 8/11, missing S brokenheart.gif born at 11 wks 1/09 



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#2 of 5 Old 01-05-2012, 06:34 PM
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This is doable; it's called Fictive Kin. Often agencies prefer it over random foster placements. I assume the caregiver knows your intentions?

I had a wonderful family in my class last year like this. Mom had met a couple while she was homeless through a ministry program. They were mentors for her and her daughter as they rebuilt their lives. Later the mom ended up with terminal cancer- very sad. The couple did the licensing requirements and took her daughter as a foster child when she became too sick to care for her. When she passed away last year, away the couple adopted. Had they wanted, she could have voluntarily signed away her parenting rights early and done the adoption while she was alive, but they didn't go that route.

I think if you are doing an arrangement like this you don't have to do all the foster training classes, just select ones. Contact the agency and explain the situation!
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#3 of 5 Old 01-05-2012, 11:53 PM
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Our state no longer recognizes Fictive Kin as having any kind of "rights"...however i'm sure an agency would welcome a person who already knows the child getting foster licensed in order to provide care, or exploring adoption if that is an option in the case.

Katherine, single homeschooling mom to Boy Genius (17) geek.gif  Thing One (6) and Thing Two (6) fencing.gif and one outgoing Girl (12) bikenew.gif and hoping for more through foster care and adoption homebirth.jpgadoptionheart-1.gif 
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#4 of 5 Old 01-15-2012, 10:16 AM
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Many foster parents and adoptive parents are friends of the family. My advice is that if you want to get invovled, do it now! Be very proactive and call again and again. Don't give up. Do everything as fast as possible.


Do not wait until these kids are in other foster homes and are bonded with those families!

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#5 of 5 Old 01-15-2012, 05:24 PM
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In my daughters case, the fictive kin options (and the healthiest placement possibilities IMO) were completely snubbed by cps despite very aggressive attempts on the families part.  So I know it can be an uphill battle.  In my daughters case, she was instead placed with a very toxic grandparent, just because the grandparent was "real family".  But maybe had grandma not been in the picture, CPS would have paid more attention to the fictive kin options?  Either way, I have learned that the squeaky wheel wins (at least in my county).  So definitely call, call, call and don't ever wait for them to help you. 

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