Excellent blog about child trafficking in international adoption - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 16 Old 05-02-2012, 04:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,886
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I just discovered this heartbreaking blog today, a must read for anyone interested in International adoption!

 

http://fleasbiting.blogspot.com/


We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
#2 of 16 Old 05-03-2012, 01:30 PM
 
Tigerchild's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Seattle Eastside
Posts: 5,005
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Hard to read (even though it's not new info, at least not to me) but...thank you for sharing this blog, Tiffani.
 

Tigerchild is offline  
#3 of 16 Old 05-07-2012, 07:25 PM
 
Mom31's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: America
Posts: 3,634
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Thank you Tiffany for posting this I added this blog to my blogroll.
 


mdcblog5.gifsaynovax.giffambedsingle2.gifhomebirth.jpg

 

 

Mom31 is offline  
#4 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 01:04 PM
 
Marcimama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

I haven't gotten at all "in to" the Rick Warren stuff... and really don't know a thing about what he is advocating. The whole "One Less Orphan" slogans and such aren't really my style, and I get sick of them too. I call it "mercy fatigue" where you just get sick of all the cheesy ways people try to make a hard thing like adoption look "cool" and "neat"... it isn't either.

 

As a Christian I get what this writer (the blog) is saying. I agree... it is soo soo much more than stats, verses and a neat and tidy choice. There IS a lot of "well-intentioned" but equally harmful things about the whole "adoption movement." I think it is really easy to throw some scripture around, state some stats and pull on some heart strings and emotionally blackmail people into adopting. 

 

For those of you who aren't practicing Christians I do want you to know that this is sort of like a "sub-culture" in Christian circles, really a very very small one. But when you are in the adoption world it is a very noisy voice, I admit! :-) Quite honestly, most Christians are very very content to not care about anyone but themselves (which is horrifying for me to even write, because it isn't what is taught or written of in God's word). All that said, that it isn't like we show up to church and listen to how we all ought to be  "saving the 163 million orphans in the world" ... in fact, I have never heard a sermon or teaching on adoption or orphan care in my own church (even though our pastor has 2 adopted children because they have furtility issues). I get this drift that a lot of non-religionous people out there think Christians are ALL out there to indoctrinate children via adoption or that church upon church is teaching this message of "save the orphans". It isn't even close to the truth! Really it isn't. 

 

 

Back to the emotional "blackmail" messages... I think it does happen to certain folks when they do hear about the needs of parentless children, and it isn't a good thing at all. Quite honestly that is why I think a lot of adoptive parents struggle so much after adoption, because they were persuaded or emotionally influenced into adopting a child or done so for self-fulling reasons, not because they felt able and ready to take on a child with varying needs. 

 

 

I know the author was speaking directly about the lack of concern placed on "orphan care"... my perspective on that is that, yes it is true this one man isn't doing an remotely good job of advocating for the "prevention of orphans" but that the fruit of the "adoption movement" is a logical outflow to the greater orphan care, family-care and the prevention of orphans! I'm not saying Rick Warren is thus right in doing what he is doing, but that it has lead to positive and even greater things like evaluating how we can participate in helping the full scope of the orphan crisis (which I don't even like terms like that, mind you.) I don't know many people who adopt and end up not seeing the logical need for prevention, there are some, I suppose. More and more people are saying, "Adoption isn't the end all of the orphan crisis, prevention is" and they are putting their money and time there, now, as oppose to adopting. 

 

That is really where we are at: advocating for children who truly have no other options (like Reece's Rainbow kids), supporting children to live with family (namely a child we had hoped to adopt, but found his family wished to raise him, but didn't have the help they needed) and also supporting kids in school.

 

Really, I am SO glad we adopted, I would never ever undo that, but prevention is about 1000x easier and better for everyone! :-) That is what should be preached!!!

 

I see far more Christians (that I personally know) support kids through child sponsorship (than adopt)... I think the blog author has really failed at finding out the stats on what is spent on prevention, but I would think it would be higher than adoption... but then again they were talking directly about this conference and Rick Warren, so that might not be the point. 

 

Over all, I am really looking forward to reading more on this blog... it looks like they do their homework! Thanks for sharing!


Marci

knit.gif

Married to my best friend, homeschooling, gardening,

running a camp for at-risk kiddos and walking a narrow path.

 

Mom to an amazingly fun crew of 5!

hearts.gifafro.jpg  wave.gif   thumbsuck.gif     boc.gif 

Marcimama is offline  
#5 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 01:12 PM
 
Marcimama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

Also Tiffani, when that was posted on "the group" about "The Summit" my thoughts were (after looking into it) "Hum, it looks good, but I wonder if this will just be all about "why you all need to adopt or how great adoption is, yada yada"... That was why I didn't sign up... I just got the drift that that was what it was about. I guess that was the case.

 

I'd really wonder what some of the ladies felt about it who went, and who are a bit more "prevention" minded? 

 

You know, the other thing that really gripes me sometimes, is that at times the loudest voices out there critizing others (not the blog writer but just various people I know)...  but are those who don't clearly do ANY thing but gripe... haha.  They don't seem to really be doing anything to help prevent orphans but to gripe about how broken a thing adoption is... but then again, I don't want to judge... because maybe they are, but it just isn't clearly seen???

 

Just an observation.


Marci

knit.gif

Married to my best friend, homeschooling, gardening,

running a camp for at-risk kiddos and walking a narrow path.

 

Mom to an amazingly fun crew of 5!

hearts.gifafro.jpg  wave.gif   thumbsuck.gif     boc.gif 

Marcimama is offline  
#6 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 01:22 PM
 
Mom31's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: America
Posts: 3,634
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Marci-   Keep reading this blog and you will see that in fact they are very active in the reform movement. 
 


mdcblog5.gifsaynovax.giffambedsingle2.gifhomebirth.jpg

 

 

Mom31 is offline  
#7 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 01:52 PM
 
Marcimama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marcimama View Post

 

You know, the other thing that really gripes me sometimes, is that at times the loudest voices out there critizing others (not the blog writer but just various people I know)...  but are those who don't clearly do ANY thing but gripe... haha.  They don't seem to really be doing anything to help prevent orphans but to gripe about how broken a thing adoption is... but then again, I don't want to judge... because maybe they are, but it just isn't clearly seen???

 

Just an observation.

 

I am glad that they do, that is good to know.

But please re-read and look at what I "bolded"... I specifically said, "not the blog wrtters, but various people I know"...

 

I really wasn't critizing them... If you re-read you'll see I agree with nearly everything they wrote, but wanted to add that this isn't the norm in Christian circles, and also just to share my heart. I do think there are a lot of people out there that just want to gripe about things, as many as there are that want to share about adoption but really don't do anything to help the real problem (prevention)... my point is that they are really doing the same thing... just flapping their jaws or tiring their fingers (typing).

Thanks.


Marci

knit.gif

Married to my best friend, homeschooling, gardening,

running a camp for at-risk kiddos and walking a narrow path.

 

Mom to an amazingly fun crew of 5!

hearts.gifafro.jpg  wave.gif   thumbsuck.gif     boc.gif 

Marcimama is offline  
#8 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 01:56 PM
 
Mom31's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: America
Posts: 3,634
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

NO no- I know- I just did not know if you looked at the rest of their blog.  They are very active and looks like you would be interested in the rest of it.
 


mdcblog5.gifsaynovax.giffambedsingle2.gifhomebirth.jpg

 

 

Mom31 is offline  
#9 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 02:03 PM
 
Marcimama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

Ok, cool. Thanks for letting me know. :-)  I'm going to keep reading... it is a tough one, Tiffani was right in saying it is "heart-breaking" :-( 

Thanks again for hearing me out.


Marci

knit.gif

Married to my best friend, homeschooling, gardening,

running a camp for at-risk kiddos and walking a narrow path.

 

Mom to an amazingly fun crew of 5!

hearts.gifafro.jpg  wave.gif   thumbsuck.gif     boc.gif 

Marcimama is offline  
#10 of 16 Old 05-11-2012, 02:16 PM
 
Mom31's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: America
Posts: 3,634
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Ya- after re reading what I wrote I could see I wrote it wrong- I think you would really like to follow them- they are adoptive parents themselves.
 


mdcblog5.gifsaynovax.giffambedsingle2.gifhomebirth.jpg

 

 

Mom31 is offline  
#11 of 16 Old 05-12-2012, 09:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,886
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I have been pretty immersed in this subject over the last few weeks, and came across this documentary (shown here in 5 parts, watch them all if you can find time ;-))  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf2_N0-Hdss -- it's mostly about  Romania, but it's really eye-opening, and pertains to international adoption in most countries, I think... the exact same thing is happening in Ethiopia (and has been for a few years) and is starting to happen in Uganda.  


We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
#12 of 16 Old 05-12-2012, 10:17 AM
 
Mom31's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: America
Posts: 3,634
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

It is all so sad....  Thank you for sharing.
 


mdcblog5.gifsaynovax.giffambedsingle2.gifhomebirth.jpg

 

 

Mom31 is offline  
#13 of 16 Old 05-14-2012, 01:56 PM
 
Marcimama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

Yeah. I think I have sort of come around to thinking that unless a child is waiting, with obvious reason why they are institutionalized then there is a legitimate risk that something could have occured to make them profit someone else (and I am not even saying the obvious reason is being an older child... I am talking "special needs" or things of that nature, because it is clear even older children from Ethiopia were taken from their families). 

 

Do you feel like Hauge nations really do eliminate this issue? 

I know it is hard to say that across the board, but is that a general assumption that would be safe to make?

 

So wishing there was a simple solution or system to make this not an issue...

 

 

Also, Tiffani, do you get the general feeling that adoptions in Uganda have dramatically slowed down as of recent... Perhaps that will help some??? 


Marci

knit.gif

Married to my best friend, homeschooling, gardening,

running a camp for at-risk kiddos and walking a narrow path.

 

Mom to an amazingly fun crew of 5!

hearts.gifafro.jpg  wave.gif   thumbsuck.gif     boc.gif 

Marcimama is offline  
#14 of 16 Old 05-18-2012, 10:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,886
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I think having a centralized referral system is huge, but even then there can be issues, especially in a culture like Uganda, where bribes are so common...but hague is a great first step, and I think Uganda is on it's way there, hopefully...

 

I haven't gotten the impression that things have slowed down in UG, (aside from the usual momentary pauses that happen for various reasons) but I don't pay too much attention and I don't know anyone *personally* who is currently in the process -- I see people on the board talking about court dates and traveling, etc, but I don't know about larger numbers.... I heard somewhere that there were over 600 cases in process for this year, which is a massive jump from last year -- so that's pretty scary, really... but will all of those cases actually get through?  we shall see... I think, too, that there are big changes coming this year, so..... I can't really recommend UG adoption to anyone right now, unless it is a VERY clear cut case, and even then, they might end up stuck in process forever, depending on what is coming down the pipeline with revised policies, etc....  I know that it hasn't been wonderful, and change is very much needed, and hopefully it will result in children who truly need families finding them and less "demand" driving the train....

Mom31 likes this.

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
#15 of 16 Old 05-28-2012, 09:07 AM
 
Marcimama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

Oh sheesh, 600 cases!!! I really hope that isn't true, but with all those agencies working there, perhaps it is. I was asked by a local agency to "help them develop their UG program"... haha, I told them, "my advice, don't develop it,". I don't think they have a good track record any way. :-/

Thanks for the thoughts.


Marci

knit.gif

Married to my best friend, homeschooling, gardening,

running a camp for at-risk kiddos and walking a narrow path.

 

Mom to an amazingly fun crew of 5!

hearts.gifafro.jpg  wave.gif   thumbsuck.gif     boc.gif 

Marcimama is offline  
#16 of 16 Old 05-31-2012, 10:17 AM - Thread Starter
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,886
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I'm not sure where that figure came from, I can't remember where I heard it now... S**a B*****n maybe?  she has done a ton of research... I don't see how that many could be seen in court in a year, but I think it was basically the "line up" -- maybe all cases in process, from waiting for referrals to trying to get through court?  not sure.... it will be interesting to see the #'s from 2011... do you know how many kids were adopted in 2011?
 


We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
Reply

Tags
Adoption

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off