Looking to adopt at some point - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 03-03-2014, 04:49 PM - Thread Starter
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Hello Everyone!


I am so new to the foster parent/adoption game its ridiculous. Little bit of back ground... I am 26 years old and have a daughter who is almost 6, I am currently unemployed, however am starting a new job at the end of the month. My partner is almost 25 and just recently lost a job, however she just started a job today =)! We have been together for almost 4 years and have been engaged to be married for 3 1/2 of those years... we aren't married because it isn't legal yet but we are optimistic it will be legal this year. We have been living together for over 2 years. Our credit is TERRIBLE and we have some bills in collections. We aren't rich by any means. So here we go... we want to adopt kids =) desperately. We would like to adopt a sibling group. Knowing our information what would you recommend... We would like to adopt from foster care. I know we are kinda far from actual adoption at this point but I would like to know how to move closer to that process. How long do we have to be together? does credit matter? Is how much money you make a giant factor? please any and all information is welcome... like i said i am so new to this any info is needed. oh and i am from oregon if that matters at all. thank you all so much

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#2 of 6 Old 03-03-2014, 06:49 PM
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Welcome to Mothering!!


I would suggest that you contact your local foster care agency (DCF) and let them know of your interest. Go through the training and see if you are still interested at the end of it. If you are, I would think they would be able to start you off fostering before you determine about making a commitment to adopt. Children in the foster care system have many many needs and you may find it satisfying to foster for a while while you sort out your finances and work through your decision!


I'm sure others will be along soon to put in their 2 cents!


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#3 of 6 Old 03-03-2014, 06:59 PM
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I think if you are adopting they will want you to be able to financially care for the children.  You don't have to have a lot of money but enough.  In Canada, you get money when you foster so it may be different that way.  Good luck! :)

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#4 of 6 Old 03-04-2014, 09:00 AM - Thread Starter
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thanks for a little insight. we for sure aren't ready yet to adopt. I don't want to have any bills that are in collections or anything else that could count against us. we just want to start moving towards it. moving towards something but not knowing exactly what you are moving towards makes things difficult...

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#5 of 6 Old 03-04-2014, 06:17 PM
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I can give my experience which may or may not apply in your situation/location/agency/etc. 


In my experience adopting from foster care they will do everything they can to help you qualify. My income is low, my credit was not checked. I had to submit proof of employment, paystubs or w2s etc. i had to fill out a simple financial worksheet that listed monthly bills and i just had to make sure my income was high enough to meet those obligations. They looked at my ability to support my current family NOT whether i could afford to add another child. I didnt have to submit actual bank statements or anything like that but other people may have had to do so, i dont know. 


In terms of things like length of relationship, length of job etc they are usually just looking for stability, and may have a certain length of time you must have had xyz....like, married at least a year if you are married, or held a job for a certain length of time. It cant hurt to go to an orientation and just see, they are usually pretty upfront and you can even ask about your specific situation and what you might need to qualify. 


I have to say, from personal experience, that adding a child to the family when you are under financial stress or undergoing major life changes like a new job isnt probably the best idea so waiting awhile couldnt hurt. 


Fostering first instead of just adopting has both pros and cons so you might want to look into that option as well. 

Katherine, single homeschooling mom to Boy Genius (17) geek.gif  Thing One (6) and Thing Two (6) fencing.gif and one outgoing Girl (12) bikenew.gif and hoping for more through foster care and adoption homebirth.jpgadoptionheart-1.gif 
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#6 of 6 Old 03-04-2014, 08:41 PM - Thread Starter
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thank you so much! this is the insight i was looking into.

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