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#1 of 3 Old 08-31-2014, 01:03 PM - Thread Starter
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Can you help?

Hello, I know that this maybe a little strange of a message to find on here but I am not sure where to turn. I am hoping that maybe someone will feel a connection to me.
I am a little older, I am 19 years old and have recently come out of foster care and sorted my life out and settled down and I am doing good but I would really like to be able to have parents, I attend school but I would like to have a mom and dad that is an online relationship and it is a parent/child relationship and it is just as if their child has gone to college and is living away from home it would mean so much for me to have parents of course not legally but the relationship someone I could talk to about everything and share my school work with when I have done good.

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#2 of 3 Old 08-31-2014, 05:54 PM
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Hi Girazol,

My heart absolutely goes out to you, but I am really worried about the safety of you confiding in, and receiving advice from, a totally unvetted stranger via internet. The situation could be really badly abused. I think a lot of people on the internet are more comfortable answering specific questions, and I think that's a safer option for you as well.

So here's what I'd suggest -
1. Do you have any contact information for foster care/social services in your state? Is there someone you've been in touch with there, who you could reach out to? Because you're over 18, they probably aren't legally obligated to do anything, but they might know of support groups, or organizations that help students in your situation. Ask if they can give you contact information, or help you get in touch.

2. Look for student groups that might deal with students like you. Is there a group on campus for students who are the first in their families to go to college? What about students who have lost a parent? Ethnic groups? Religious groups? Can you go to a few meetings and check them out?

3. What are your feelings about religious groups? I'm atheist, but have found Unitarian churches to be a really good resource, and they're sort of required to be open-minded. Would it help you to go to a few services at local churches, find one you're comfortable at, and then see if they have any kind of young adult group? Churches can be really great resources, so look for that.

There's an organization called Foster Care to Success that helps students in your situation. Their website is Unfortunately, I can't really see how, short of applying for a scholarship in January, you wind up on their radar for mentorship and care packages. You may need a social worker or professor to refer you. (This is why step 1.) It may be worth giving them a call and asking, though.
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#3 of 3 Old 09-04-2014, 09:47 PM
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Would you be willing to adopt this online community as a bunch of "aunties" and a few "uncles"? Post in the personal growth forum with specific questions/concerns/joys to share... Or keep this thread going and we can help hold a space for you to receive supportive posts.
I share MeepyCat's concerns and advise caution about online relationships. Keeping to a larger supportive community like we have here feels like a safer way to interact, in my overprotective opinion.

So, as a curious "auntie", I want to know: What classes are you taking? How many units? Do you have to work full time or part time while studying? Have you remembered to drink enough water today?
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