New Foster Parent with a question. - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 09-24-2014, 11:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Red face New Foster Parent with a question.

My husband and I have just gotten certified for foster care 2 weeks ago. We are on a group placement loop that sends general info (age, sex, race, location) on children that need homes. We are in a rural area and there is not a lot of need close to our home the closest we have seen in need with the ages we can do as we have 3 young bio children at home is an hour and 15 min away. Should we wait or should we offer to take in a child/children from that distance? It just seems like a long time in the car (visits, court, doctors, etc) for young children, foster and bio, but on the other hand we really want to provide a good home and love for children in need and I don't mind the drive myself. Any advice would be appreciated! Thank you in advance!
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#2 of 8 Old 09-24-2014, 05:37 PM
 
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Do not say yes until you are sure. If you have to drive to visits then it is a lot of work when you have bio children to take care of as well. Be patient, the right placement will come along. Since you are so far, can they provide a driver for visitation?

Me(33), Mama to a crazy DD (6), Wife to a wonderful mountain man(32) BF my babe for 2 years
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#3 of 8 Old 09-24-2014, 07:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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To be honest I am not sure. We have not had a placement yet and we had called to ask more information about 1 child but she was already placed. But I just was not sure if I was being unrealistic waiting for a placement a little closer or if saying I would take one that far away was unrealistic with that many children to haul that far. Sorry for all the questions and if I sound ridiculous. Like I said we have not had a placement yet and have not seen the same licencor person twice so I have more questions than answers.
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#4 of 8 Old 09-27-2014, 08:11 AM
 
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I would wait. The distance would be a killer, for me.
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#5 of 8 Old 09-28-2014, 06:34 AM
 
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Yeah, in our county, kid under 3 have to have 3 visits a week. That would be too much for 3 times a week.
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#6 of 8 Old 09-28-2014, 03:25 PM
 
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Three visits a week? That's a lot.
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#7 of 8 Old 11-21-2014, 06:20 PM
 
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Ask your agency/county if they will provide a driver, and if yes, how far they will drive. This could be a big factor.

You should also consider the county's requirements. Do you need to use a specific doctor? Does the child need to stay in the same daycare or school? How many visits (1x week, more? fewer?) are required? This will give you an idea of how much time you'll be in a car.

You can also ask the social worker how hard it may be to otherwise place these children. It may be better for the kids to be placed with you if it means all three brothers/sisters can be together than to have them placed in a location closer to their bio home. Brothers and sisters really benefit from being together (you can read a list of benefits on my blog http://thebeautifulopportunity.com .

Also, what about your significant other? Is he/she willing to drive or spend time away from you while you're driving?

A few thoughts.
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#8 of 8 Old Today, 08:04 PM
 
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That is pretty far. And agreed, the younger they are the more visits they're likely to get--so make SURE you know who's doing the visit driving. If you can find a local foster parent support group, they will let you know 1) what your agency/office is going to say; and 2) what the reality is likely to be. Because the two might be different.
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