Where are you in the adoption process? ROLLCALL - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-31-2005, 03:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I thought it would be nice to see where everyone is in the adoption process and share a little about our experiences.

We are in the process of adopting our second child. We are approved and just waiting for a match. We are using LDSFS and are looking for an infant of any race and would accept special needs if it felt right. Our daughter was adopted through LDSFS at birth. It was a transracial, special medical needs adoption. We are thrilled with our daughter and our experiences so far. Haley is almost 2.5.

We would like to adopt a few more times after this.

So, how about you? Are you an adoptive parent? Where are you now? Plans for the future? Past experiences? Were you adopted? Are you a birthmother?
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Old 01-31-2005, 04:51 PM
 
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We are currently paperchasing to adopt #4 from Haiti. This will be our first adoption, and we're soooo excited. We have 2 more documents to collect before we can schedule our homestudy visits. DH keeps putting off his physical- he's afraid they'll want to do a prostate exam :LOL

We're also waiting for a response to a letter we wrote the the director of Haitian social services (IBESR) asking for preapproval to adopt. We don't meet the legal requirements to adopt from Haiti (VERY few adoptive parents do, this is common), so we're waiting for preapproval before send our dossier to Haiti.

To be honest, I've been feeling a little apprehensive about Haitian adoption lately. I keep hearing stories of adoptive parents who have been stuck in process for months (sometimes years) on end. It's so tempting to choose a different country where timeframes are more consistent. But both DH and I feel drawn to Haiti, this is where we feel we should be right now, so I guess we'll stick with it. But we're not going to file any papers with immigration until we receive the preapproval.

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Old 01-31-2005, 08:06 PM
 
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We have adopted two children from China, in 97 and 01. We are now in the process of readopting them. In my county, it's a complete PIA--like doing a private adoption from scratch, and I have to admit, I've been dragging my feet. We will need an entirely new homestudy, and the judge in this court will only let you use a SW of her choosing, which really ticks me off. We had a great SW for our adoptions and post placements and it just kills me to start this stupid process all over again with somebody new.

However, we can't take the tax credit on #2 until the readoption is complete, so that's a motivator. The only real reason I'd do this is that dd#2 won't be a citizen until we do. My physical is Thursday, and I'm hoping the doctor won't want to check my prostate, either. :

:LOL
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Old 01-31-2005, 08:22 PM
 
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We are in the process of homestudy and paperchasing for a Haitian adoption as well. I am basically in the same place as annethcz. We don't fit the requirements for a Haitian adoption and with the stories of people waiting for so long we are tempted to switch programs as well. But we really feel drawn to Haiti and that it is where we are supposed to adopt from. Either way we are also waiting on pre-approval. We probably have another 2 months until our homestudy and paperwork is done and then it has to go to the Canadian government which will take about a month and then on to Haiti. We have been at this since mid-October and it seems to be taking forever!

Shawna, married to Michael, mommy to Elijah 1/18/01, Olivia 11/9/02, and Eliana 1/22/06
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Old 01-31-2005, 08:29 PM
 
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We are in the information gathering stage of adopting #3 (first adoption) from China. We don't meet the age requirement yet so we are in a holding pattern until my 30th birthday. We hope to have all the docs done and be DTC (Dossier to China) right after my birthday. As It stands now that means we have 1 1/2 years to go until we send in out paperwork and 2 to 2 1/2 years until we hold our next child in our arms. It feels like an eternity right now, but the plus side is we have tons of time to paperchase and save, save, save.

Mom to dd1 7/00 reading.gif, dd2 12/03 upsidedown.gif, and ds 2/07 afro.jpg - home forever 9/07
In raising my children, I have lost my mind but found my soul. -Lisa T. Shepherd
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Old 01-31-2005, 09:28 PM
 
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We brought our son home from Ethiopia on November 20th (National Adoption Day!). We had started the process the pervious September, so it took us 14 months. We didn't actually apply to the placement agency until February, though. We had to take state-mandated classes and do our homestudy first.

We have a bio daughter who will be three in February, and our son will be 2 in February. The kids are officially 355 apart, but our son's birthdate is approximated (although we feel it's very accurate).

We both hope to adopt again. We will go back to Ethiopia. We plan to adopt a 3-5 year old boy when our kids are 6 and 7. But I told our agency's director to keep us in mind for any child she feels would fit into our family, because we know that the right child will come along for us at the right time, just as our first two did.

Namaste!
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Old 02-01-2005, 01:35 AM
 
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We're 18 months into TTC and starting to examine other options to become parents. We've found programs that we're interested in, but there isn't much chance that we'll be able to do anything concrete for several years as DH and I are both graduate students and have very, very little income.

However, I do have an interview for a job that would be part time until graduation and full time afterward that has as a part of their benefit package a comparitively large adoption benefit... so that would potentially move the timeframe up a little bit.

Spending all of my money and time on this wild, wild life.
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Old 02-01-2005, 02:45 AM
 
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Hi, I am an adoptive mom. Our daughter has been with us just over a year and we finalized in November. We did a domestic transracial adoption, and everything has gone great.

My son is a bio-child. He's great, too.

L.
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Old 02-01-2005, 03:44 AM
 
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We brought our dd home from China 4/29/04. She is now just about 20 months old. We completed our readoption in Nov., and have the adoption decree, but are awaiting an American birth certificate from the state. She should now be considered a US citizen but I have yet to have that affirmed by the powers that be. After we get her b.certificate we'll get her a passport to show her citizenship. We still have 1 more postplacement visit in April, then that's it!

We have 3 bio sons, so most likely we will not adopt (or birth!) again, but as I like to remind dh, never say never..... but I do feel our family is complete.

Looking forward to our 1st Chinese New Year all together!
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Old 02-01-2005, 05:04 AM
 
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I am in the process of adopting my second child from Guatemala. DS came home in Jan. 2002 at 5 months old. He is now 3 1/2! DD-to-be will be 2 months old tomorrow, and her case has just entered PGN, the final court. Of course, no one can say how much longer the process will take, but I am cautiously hoping for an early homecoming.

EFmom, could you readopt in another county? That's what I did (in Texas). My HS agency told me readoption was a big hassle in my home county (pretty much what you describe). They recommended going to another county (about an hour's drive from here) where the process was far simpler. I just paid the attoney and appeared before a judge for about five minutes, and that was that.
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Old 02-01-2005, 10:25 AM
 
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I am a single, WAH, homeschooling mom to 3 - one grown. I am just finishing (I hope!) the licensing process for domestic adoption and fostering. I am looking to foster high medical needs babies (preemie, drug-exposed, disabled, HIV+, or any combination). But at 47, I don't feel up to adopting an infant. 20 MORE years of full-time parenting!?! And we have far too many Legos aroung here for a toddler to be safe! I could, however, fall in love and forget I ever said this. I would also like to adopt a couple (or more?) school-age kids. Disabilities, medical needs, etc. could all be considered. I am a very verbal person, and I just love when kids get to the age to begin to have abstract conversations!

Rhu - mother,grandmother,daughter,sister,friend-foster,adoptive,and biological;not necessarily in that order. Some of it's magic, some of it's tragic, but I had a good life all the way (Jimmy Buffet)

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Old 02-01-2005, 01:26 PM
 
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Quote:
EFmom, could you readopt in another county?
I wish. In our state, you must use the family or surrogate court for the county in which you reside. I guess it must be part of the "Social Worker Full Employment Act."
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Old 02-01-2005, 02:03 PM
 
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our homestudy. Trying to save up the 600$ for the I600 form. Then we'll have another home visit and the waiting begins. Adopting 2 girls from Russia hopefully this year but could very well be next.

notes2.gifDina sahm to geek.gif, bikenew.gif, and joy.gif. I'm always computergeek2.gif, dishes.gif andhang.gif.
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Old 02-01-2005, 04:01 PM
 
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I'm currently in the saving money/getting life in order stage of planning to adopt from China. I'm thinking it will be at least 2 years before I begin the process, which make take me longer because of the singles quota. Assuming no winning lottery tickets and prince charmings show up in the meantime.
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Old 02-01-2005, 05:40 PM
 
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All done...for now!

Brought the last one (but the oldest one) home from Guatemala almost two years ago (February 26th). We plan to wait awhile before discussing if we want to adopt/foster again. We'll see!
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Old 02-01-2005, 05:46 PM
 
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Glad to see I'm not the only one with a seemingly never ending process, but gosh, couldn't someone fix this crazy system?

The most important part was done in August, when we brought Anna home from Guatemala. Her re-adoption in our county was completed in mid-December, but I'm still waiting on a birth certificate so I can apply for citizenship for her. My partner then has to do a second parent adoption this year.

This child will have three birth certificates, two passports, a green card, a social security number and three adoption decrees by the time we are finished.
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Old 02-01-2005, 06:04 PM
 
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Boy, Diane & EFMom, you 2 aren't giving me a lot of hope :LOL

IIRC, EFMom, you're in MN too, right?

I guess I just need to concentrate on getting a child home first, then I can worry about the PITA readoption stuff later.... (and PLEASE tell me that you're not in Dakota county, the judge sounds a wee bit unreasonable!)

New signature, same old me: Ann- mama of 2 boys and 2 girls, partnered to a fabulous man.
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Old 02-01-2005, 06:15 PM
 
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We have one bio baby, who has somehow suddenly become a 5 y.o. boy. Like his parents, he is of mixed European/Scandinavian heritage.

Our daughter, who turned one in December, was born domestically to birthparents from Jamaica and Belize. Her ethno-racial heritage is complex -- I'm trying to decide what the short description should be when strangers ask casually and a five-minute conversation isn't what I'm after. Any and all of the following would be accurate depending on your politics and the context: biracial, black/white, Jamaican-Belizian, Afro-Latina, Afro-Caribbean, Afro-Caucasian-Caribbean-Latina. I think that last one feels best to me for now -- want her to grow up knowing that we celebrate all parts of her heritage. If she wants to self-identify differently as she ages, she certainly can.

[As an aside, someone recently asked me what her *nationality* was. In all my busy thinking about how to honor her heritage, I forgot to say she was an American! Duh.]

We have an open adoption with her birthmother, who I adore and think about every day.

Both kids are the most beautiful, delightful creatures ever to grace the planet. How's that for heartfelt hyperbole?
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Old 02-01-2005, 07:04 PM
 
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IIRC, EFMom, you're in MN too, right?
Nope. NYS.
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Old 02-01-2005, 09:27 PM
 
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We are in in the middle of our first adoption from Guatemala. This will be our third time becoming parents, we have 2 daughters by birth. We currently have embassy approval for the necessary DNA testing and are expecting it to be done any day now. I am not sure if our case have entered Guatemalan family court yet. Our daughter will be one month old tomorrow (Tuesday). We plan on visiting her next month.

Married to my high school sweetheart. We have four awesome kids.
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Old 02-02-2005, 03:41 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EFmom
Nope. NYS.


Hmmm.... I wonder what I've been smoking, to miss that one?

Sorry about that!

I'm relieved that I don't have to worry about that judge, but what a PITA for you!

New signature, same old me: Ann- mama of 2 boys and 2 girls, partnered to a fabulous man.
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Old 02-02-2005, 09:55 PM
 
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We adopted DS domestically (through LDSFS too, mamatohaleybug) at 2 days old. He's 2.5 now and we have our homestudy done and are waiting for a second. We almost had a twin placement a month ago, but the birthmom decided to parent the babies instead. So, we're just waiting for #2. We're also TTC, so one way or another I hope it doesn't take too long.
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Old 02-02-2005, 10:58 PM
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Hi,
We adopted DS 15 months ago. We are so lucky, and had a great experience with the placement agency. We've just completed our homestudy update and are waiting for a second child.
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Old 02-05-2005, 01:55 AM
 
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Hello everyone!

I am not in the adoption process, but will be someday. I am very involved with adoption and love hearing the success stories!
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Old 02-05-2005, 08:16 PM
 
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We're finished with our homestudy and waiting for dc #2 through Open Adoption and Family Services, who we adopted dd through two and a half years ago. I'm also trying to get through the Newman-Goldfarb protocal to have more of my own milk this time around...

We have an open adoption with dd and I think lovingly of her birthmom daily. I love that she gets to wrestle with her birthmom!
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Old 02-06-2005, 11:17 PM
 
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My youngest DS is from Guatemala. He is 2 years and 7 months old. We brought him home in December 2002 when he was 5 1/2 months old. I have five grown bios and 5 grandchildren. We have his New Jersey birth certificate and his passport. We chose not to readopt. Since we both saw him before the adoption was final, he became a US citizen as soon as the plane landed in the US. And yes, our son has 3 birth certificates, 2 passports, 2 names, a social security card, a green card, but only one adoption deed.

Kathi

:::Mom to 5 adult children and 8 year old, Dakota "Why do they call it homeschool, we're never at home?"
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Old 02-07-2005, 01:18 AM
 
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I don't think I've ever posted in this forum, so this can serve as my introduction as well!

DH and I are in the very beginning stages of adopting from South Korea (we've been to an adoption seminar, settled on an agency and are doing some research on adoption practitioners in our area while DH makes an appointment for a physical and we get a copy of our marriage license and all that other fun paperwork).

We started TTC a year ago, and when I never got pregnant, we decided to go ahead and adopt now, rather than waiting (we'd originally planned to have two bio kids and then adopt, but plans have changed).

Looking forward to getting to know all you other adoptive mamas.

Kimberly: blogging wife to Todd and work-at-home-struggling-with-work/life-balance adoptive mama to Adam (2005) and Leah (2008)
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Old 02-07-2005, 01:24 AM
 
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I haven't posted much in this forum, so I'll introduce myself as well.

DH and I have been TTCing for a year. I am ready to start the adoption process while we sort through why we aren't getting pregnant (we think it's my thyroid). Unfortunately, I'm having trouble convincing DH to go that route. He has agreed that we can pursue adoption eventually, and I think we've settled on Guatemala. He just isn't ready to take that step. So, I'm kind of in limbo trying to figure out how to convince him to move forward.
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Old 02-21-2005, 01:43 AM
 
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I am the bio mom of my biggest babe who is 28 years old now. Kathi, you are the first mom I've "met" with a bigger gap between your oldest and youngest Solomon is his name...
My littles both joined the family through infant domestic adoption. Delany (DD) will be 5 next month and came home when she was 7 weeks old. Mandela (DS#2) was 12 hours old when I met him and I actually got to room in with him in the hospital He's 15 months now.
DH says we're done; I'm thinking that when ManMan is 3 we may look into young toddler adoption from wherever in Africa or Haiti adoptions are still being done. Twins, sibs or attached friends; it will be a twosome
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Old 02-21-2005, 12:24 PM
 
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We are in the waiting stage adopting a girl from S. Korea. We have one bio son, who will be 7 in April (yikes!) I am a SAHM, but I also am working towards my master's while ds is in school, and dh is in the Air Force, 3 years from retirement. So far, our adoption process has been relatively easy; except for a delayed homestudy because of a sick social worker, it has been moving along. We expect to have a referral late summer/fall and travel around this time next year to pick her up!

edited for bad spelling
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