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mamahen2coop 07-27-2011 06:08 PM

the whole story will have to come later but I have a minute, somehow, and I just need some hugs.

So last I posted in the "still prego" thread in the morning of 7/23 before I went to work. Id had some painful but irregular contractions through the night but fallen back asleep. I tiredly went to work and continued to have some painful but not too bad and irregular, like 5-15 mins contractions. It wasn't too busy at work so I got to leave at 1130. I went to Trader Joes and got some trail mix and some other things then Dairy Queen to get an ice cream cake for when ever the big day would be. It's a 20 minute drive home and I stopped for gas along the way. I tried to take a nap but they didn't really slow down so I got up and told DH that we should maybe start think about getting things ready just in case. At 1:15 I called the midwife to give her a heads up that they were painful and now about 5-10 minutes but that I didn't think she needed to come yet. DH and I did the "stuff" the midwife said we should do like boil water and get the bed made. DH moved the tub outside and got it all set.

at 2:15 I called the midwife back and said it was time to come since she was an hour away, and for the grandparents to come get the toddler. Contractions continued and got closer together and when I stopped counting them at 2:45 they were down to every 2-3 mins. I labored outside with the sun on my back for only about 30 minutes after we finally got everything "ready". the midwife showed up about 3:15-3:30 ish and I was 9 with a bulging bag of water. I knew I had a bulging bag because I could feel it! but still contractions weren't too bad, I was very surprised I was 9 since I figured I was about 5-6. I got in the tub then and had about 2 contractions before all the sudden I was pushy. it was strange to me it was like a light switch and not gradual. So I started pushing. DH was behind me pushing on my back which felt really good. I remember midwife telling me to slow down once I felt the burning but I never really felt it until the last push as he was crowning. I couldn't tell you what position I was in but I think half sitting on my left with my right up some because I delivered him myself after I finally just reached down and broke my water on the contraction before he was born. it was bulging out so I figured maybe that'd help it along.

The first thing I thought when his head was born but not his shoulders was that he didn't have much hair! I pushed without a contraction to deliver the shoulders and pulled my sweet little surprise baby up to see that it was a boy. The sun was shining, the birds were flying around, and everything was perfect. He was a little slow to cry and pink up so he got a little blow by O2 and his apgars were 6/9. He was 19.5 in, weighed 6lbs 9 oz and had a nice-for-mama 34 OFC which was a peanut after my DS1's 37 OFC. I had no tears, not even a skid mark, and everything was wonderful.

The big surprise was that instantly when I met him I knew he had Down Syndrome. Im scared to watch the birth video because in the shock of it I'm afraid of what free thoughts might have floated out of my mouth. We had done a quad screen with negative results and nothing abnormal was noted on the 20 week ultrasound. We hung out together outside in the sun and nursed for a couple hours. Papa took baby and held him skin to skin in the sun for awhile too while I got cleaned up.

The excitement started when baby started to sleep and got kind of pale and shallow respirations. We were already talking to the neonatologist because we didn't know how to proceed and being a nurse myself, I knew babies with Down Syndrome have high chances of cardiac problems I didn't want him being at home and having an issue. His O2 sat was low and he looked a little punky so we called the ambulance. They came within a few minutes and checked out fine when they showed up. A paramedic showed up about 2 mintues later and by then baby was a little pale again and they got more worried. At this point I started to realize he might have significant health problems and I started crying a lot.

We went via lights and sirens to the local hospital, where I happen to work on L&D so I had already told them we were coming and they had extra doctors and staff on hand in the ER waiting for us. He looked good when we got there so we went up to the nursery and got settled in.

Long story shortened... that was 7/23. he was still nursing and doing well with just O2 support for the first day. He started working harder and harder to breathe and now we are at a higher lever NICU and he is on a ventilator. He is doing well and I think they think the outlook is good he just needs time to rest and recuperate. I'm pumping and making my normal Jersey style quantities of milk which is good so he'll have something later when he can eat again. I feel so sad for all the poking and prodding hes been through and all the antibiotics and tubes and non-bonding time that he's getting. I wonder how all that imprints him for life. Obviously he needs what will keep him around for a life, but it's just not the serene, lounge around the house for 2 weeks, play with baby cloth diapers, nurse ad lib, babymoon that I had envisioned. DH and I are both still adjusting and grieving the vision of what our family was going to be but also looking forward to the new life and special baby that we have and what he will bring to our familes.

he's really super cute and very fiesty. i'm curious to get the genetic test back only to know what kind of dislocation there was with it. he has some of the outward features but not all and has no heart defects (YAY). Only time will tell about the rest but we're just hoping to get him better and out of here just as soon as he'll let us.


greenmama66 07-27-2011 06:19 PM

Congrats! You had a beautiful birth for him and he knew you would be the best momma to him! I can't wait to see pics as I'm sure he's just gorgeous.

guatemama1 07-27-2011 06:20 PM

Wow what a story. I congratulate you on your birth and wish your family the best. The little guy is lucky to have a mama like you.

no5no5 07-27-2011 06:30 PM

hug.gif  What a crazy, scary, wonderful day.  Congratulations on your beautiful son!  I hope he is out of the NICU and back home relaxing with you before you know it.  goodvibes.gif

yell 07-27-2011 07:46 PM

He is beautiful!!

Narleegates 07-27-2011 09:07 PM

what an absolute angel!

stellabluz 07-27-2011 09:12 PM

Beautiful story about a family you will no doubt be a mighty mama for. You can just tell. My midwife just had a very similar birth experience with one of her clients. This is her side work that you might find beneficial since you are thoughtfully considering his (and your) experience as of now and at the birth.

Lots of love your way.

Rach 07-27-2011 09:29 PM

He is beautiful! Congratulations! joy.gif

I'm sorry you're missing out on your babymoon at home, but hopefully he'll be home soon and you can pick back up on a nice babymoon with him. 

tourist. 07-27-2011 10:37 PM

Congratulations!  What an absolutely beautiful birth - such a wonderful way to welcome your son to the world.  While I'm sure it's of little importance now, but if you had known that he had down syndrome before he was born his birth would have likely been so much different, so much less serene and beautiful.  I'm so happy for you that his entrance into the world was so perfect.  He is adorable and I hope that you are home and enjoying your babymoon soon.  My thoughts are with you.   

lovelylisa 07-27-2011 10:50 PM

He's beautiful Mama, congratulations!joy.gifWhat a beautiful birth and a beautiful story. You'll be home soon with your babymoon.

Momsteader 07-27-2011 11:26 PM

DDDC but had to stop in and say he's beautiful!  My second son was in the NICU for almost a month. He didn't even get to bf until 3 weeks old. It's traumatic, but soon it will be just a memory and you'll be home with your sweet boy and get your babymoon.

Nightswimming 07-28-2011 06:57 AM

Congratulations!  He is beautiful and I hope he gets to go home with you soon.


As far as thinking about how his experiences outside the womb thus far will imprint his life ...while he has not had the most gentle introduction to this world it sounds as though he had an amazing experience growing inside you as well as an amazing birth.  That counts for a lot! 


Also, I believe that Elena Tonetti (made Birth as We Know It) who is very vocal about how early experiences imprint babies lives, says that if any kind of trauma occurs during a baby's birth it can be healed later on in life... (talks about healing at the end of the article) so don't stress about the experiences your son has had thus far.  You know he needs the care he is getting even if it isn't the care you wish he was getting.  You are not allowing him to be poked and prodded just because- you have a solid reason for this.  Keep explaining to him why the things he is experiencing are happening.  I think telling babies why something is being done to them and that it may hurt but still needs to be done is a good thing to do.


Lots and lots of hugs to you and your family.  Hang in there and think of the day when you will get to bring him home and give him lots and lots of constant love.,

octanebeetle27 07-28-2011 07:00 AM

DDDC but I have to say that your son is adorable and I loved reading your birth story! I hope that he's home soon and you guys can get lots of bonding time!

artekah 07-28-2011 07:33 AM

He is so handsome and sweet and you are such a good mama! I'm happy to hear you had the perfect, magical home birth you were dreaming of! joy.gif

I hope you all get to go home very soon!

greenmama66 07-28-2011 09:13 AM

He is a beautiful angel for sure!

HawaiianBlesing 07-28-2011 09:23 AM

What a beautiful inspiring story.  Your son is absolutely adorable.  Praying for a speedy release from the NICU and a fabulous baby moon when he arrives home.  (((hugs))))

JoEngland 07-28-2011 09:32 AM

He really is beautiful, and just from reading your story I can tell that everything will work out for the best! Big hugs to you, and I hope that you can take your sweet boy home soon! hug2.gif

mamahen2coop 07-28-2011 09:50 AM

Originally Posted by tourist. View Post

Congratulations!  What an absolutely beautiful birth - such a wonderful way to welcome your son to the world.  While I'm sure it's of little importance now, but if you had known that he had down syndrome before he was born his birth would have likely been so much different, so much less serene and beautiful.  I'm so happy for you that his entrance into the world was so perfect.  He is adorable and I hope that you are home and enjoying your babymoon soon.  My thoughts are with you.   

for sure! I would have probably had to have many more ultrasounds, more monitoring, who knows what they would have done after he was born. I am SO grateful he was able to be born peacefully and have a couple hours of just mama & papa time before all this started. He was really pretty good for the first day and a half, nursing, breathing with just a little oxygen. So we did have some early bonding time. But then he started working harder and harder and it's been since Tuesday am since we've gotten to hold him greensad.gif. breaks my heart. But at this point I still just want to do what ever he needs to just get better and home. They said as soon as he's off the ventilator we can hold him again so I'm looking forward to that. He's very feisty and I'm thinking they might try to wean him off of the vent today. He's just so special and we just feel like he was meant to be with us. He was able to give us our homebirth experience which is priceless and I'm glad that he was able to be part of the process. I'm also VERY grateful that I'm not trying to recover from a c-section or any bad tears. I luckily had no tearing and my PP flow has been so minimal that I'm down to panty liners at day 5, which I thought was pretty good. Except i was supposed to be playing in my new mama cloth that I'm sure is just sitting in the mail box at home. Oh well. redface.gif

1fitmom 07-28-2011 10:10 AM

Your story is wonderful and your son is beautiful. Congratulations

Melly24 07-28-2011 09:16 PM

DDCC..My son spent 6 days in the SCBU for aspiration pneumonia after a beautiful homebirth. I mourned for the babymoon I had envisioned, and it was heartbreaking to see all the stuff that was done to him and all the wires he was hooked up to. Before we left the hospital, I spent some time telling him about the family he was coming home to, and that his world was one full of love and I apologised for all that was done to him in the previous week with tears rolling down my face. He gave me his first smile then. A proper smile and it made my heart sing! 


Congrats on your new special boy, and welcome to the world little one! xx

Gismobabe 07-28-2011 11:24 PM

I am glad your son got you and you got your very special son. I understand that you and your husband are grieving. I can tell you after my grieving experience (a very different one) that we as humans, are so adaptable and we are so able to see the sense and the good in all our experiences if we allow time to do its magic. I wish and am sure that you will adjust to your new situation fast and that you will get to hold your baby boy soon.

He is adorable BTW!

OurGift 07-29-2011 12:48 AM

Wow, what a beautiful story and an adorable angel you have there! I thought I would pass on this great blog that I have been enjoying for some months now. It is a blog of a photographer mother that has 2 little girls, one with Down Syndrome. and her birth story:

MCatLvrMom2A&X 07-29-2011 04:03 AM

He is beautiful and looks so happy in that picture. joy.gif

mugglesmom 07-29-2011 07:55 AM

What a lovely story!  I can feel the sun on me reading your words...ahhh.  He is so sweet, and looks so happy!

SoCaliMommy 07-29-2011 09:24 AM



 Congrats on your birth, he is so cute.



mumofmak 07-29-2011 11:52 AM

Lovely birth story and your son is just gorgeous! Best wishes for coming off the vent and going home soon. You gave your son such a gentle start and will make up for the time apart as soon as you can get your arms around him. We can all tell how loved this little boy is from just reading your posts - I'm certain he feels it in his heart. Don't forget to take care of yourself too!

Gismobabe 07-29-2011 12:23 PM

I love the birth story. It made me cry though because of the beautiful way she describes her pain.

Originally Posted by OurGift View Post

Wow, what a beautiful story and an adorable angel you have there! I thought I would pass on this great blog that I have been enjoying for some months now. It is a blog of a photographer mother that has 2 little girls, one with Down Syndrome. and her birth story:


mamahen2coop 07-30-2011 08:54 AM

Just an update on Dean. He's off the ventilator and has just been on 2L of O2 and breathing well on his own. Since 2L is high flow he cant go back to breastfeeding yet but he's been getting the colostrum I pumped before via a tube through his nose. He's off the bili lights for jaundice now and in an open crib instead of a warmer. He's definitely making progress but still have a ways to go to get off the oxygen. I dont know if they really know why he's not breathing adequately on his own or not but it seems to be just a really slow transition.
I haven't been able to download pictures from here but the wonderful lady (whom I just met randomly at work only a week before I delivered) who took pictures at delivery sent me another beautiful pic of us.


greenmama66 07-30-2011 10:07 AM

Beautiful pic- do they supplement him with anything else or is it just your colostrum? I pray he makes a speedy recovery and is back home soon in your arms.

JoEngland 07-30-2011 10:23 AM

I love the name, and the three of you are just beautiful! I'll be sending good recovery vibes Dean's way! goodvibes.gif

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