Cyrus’s Birth Story
It has taken me a long time to process the birth for whatever reason. I have done it in small segments and am now ready to write and share the whole birth story. This is rather long but it was really important for me to share all of it.
My midwife was going to be out of town until December 3rd. I had known this since before we conceived. (I knew that I would not go into labor while she was out of town as with my first I went into labor as she drove into the city limits.) This time we had a backup midwife that I like but I was just sure that I wouldn’t go into labor until my midwife got back into town. On the morning of the 2nd I woke up and just had so much to get done. I picked-up the entire house (something that I had not done in a while), fully cleaned my bathroom, organized my large menstrual pads on the back of the toilet with a peri bottle and put them in a cute basket (so not me), then I just had to make organic rice crispy treats. Then I finished up my final project for an independent studies class that I was taking this semester. Then I was completely starving and hadn’t cooked any dinner so I threw the diapers in the wash (since I hadn’t washed them yet) and we headed to sweet tomatoes for dinner.
On the way there, at about 6pm, I started feeling some pressure in my uterus. It wasn’t anything that I could time and it wasn’t crampy like with my previous labors. I had pressure off and on while we were eating and I went to the bathroom 4 or 5 times while we were there. On the way home I told peter that I was going to get in the bath and if the pressure like feeling didn’t stop then he should call the midwife. He said “but she isn’t back yet” I told him that she was back because I wouldn’t be going into labor until she was. While soaking in the bath the pressure began to get stronger and stronger so I had peter call our midwife. He paged her about 8:00pm and she didn’t call back so he called the back-up midwife and she came right over. (They had both told me to call right away since my labors in the past had gone fairly quickly). Right before she arrived peter put the boys to bed. When our back-up Jayme arrived she checked me and I was a 6 so we called the girls mom so she could bring them over and we called my brother so that he could be there to help with the kids. A few minutes later our midwife Jenny came in the door. I was so excited to hear her voice. I told her that I had told the baby to wait until the 3rd and she laughed and promised she wouldn’t kill me until after the baby was born. (Turns out she hadn’t returned our page because her plane was just landing. I knew she was in townJ). She brought in all of her stuff and started helping peter set up the tub. I stayed in the bath for a while and my best friend came over. She sat in there with me while peter sat up the tub. It was kind of weird because the last time that she had sat in the bathroom with me I was having an awful miscarriage. This was very healing to actually be having my baby but I was still really worried. I started to get really cold so I got out of the bath and sat on the toilet until the tub was ready. Our hot water heater doesn’t work well and Peter usually has to boil most of the water on the stove.
As soon as the tub was ready I got in the tub about 9:00 pm. I was using hypnobirthing (The mongan method) that I have used with all of my births and I did not have any pain. I usually don’t catch my labor so early on so it felt really weird to be in the tub just hanging out and talking with everyone around. The boys were in bed but the girls each took turns getting in the tub with me. My neighbor and close friend came over and we told her she could stay. Around 9:30 I started feeling my body begin to push the baby down. With my second child it only took about three of those before he was out so that is kind of what I was expecting. Peter got in the tub with me around 10:00pm and my neighbor Ashley and my brother went to wake up the boys. The pushing urge was coming closer and closer together. Both boys had a chance to get in the tub with me and put water on my belly. They were really excited. Every time that I pushed his head would begin to crown and then it would go all the way back in. I was starting to get nervous. With my first child that was happening and then his heart rate dropped because his elbow was stuck on my pelvis. I was starting to worry that something was wrong. Both Jenny and Jayme were checking the baby’s heart rate frequently, which helped me feel better.
At this point I started trying different positions to see if that would help move the baby down. It didn’t seem to be helping. Every time that I pushed Peter could see the head and then when I stopped pushing his head would go back in again. I could still feel the bag of waters. I knew as soon as that broke that I would get to meet my baby. A little after 11:00 I asked Jenny if she could check me to see if she could tell if there was a problem. She went and put on her gloves and then I had a really strong surge. I asked her to wait to check me until the surge was over. It lasted forever then all of a sudden I felt the burning in the perineum and I knew that the baby was coming out. I felt a big gush of water and then his head was out and then it took a moment and then the shoulders were out. The baby came out facing down just like he was supposed but he never turned so when I passed his shoulders I also passed his back and then his whole body was out. I was so excited. I brought him up to me and as I did I felt kind of a pop and saw a plume of blood. I didn’t really think anything about it until a moment later when Jenny was fishing in the water and she mumbled “where the he** is the cord”. At that moment I knew exactly what the popping had been and I said, “It broke! The cord broke!” Jenny grabbed the cord and asked Jayme to grab a clamp. They clamped the cord but the baby wasn’t crying. Jenny flipped him over and rubbed his back. That is when I notice that our baby was a boy. Jenny handed the baby back to me and started doing mouth to mouth. I was so scared but I knew that Jenny knew what she was doing and that I had no control over the situation. I just spoke to my baby and let him know how worried I was and how badly I wanted to meet him. Jayme brought over the oxygen and gave him a little blow by. Finally his color started to return (he had been awfully white) and he started to get his tone back. I didn’t realize until several days later how worried I had been. I just couldn’t believe that was happening. I had been worried my whole pregnancy that something was going to go wrong and here it was happening. In reality that moment was just that, a moment, but it felt so long and so scary. When I watch the birthing video it is amazing how relaxed I look because I certainly did not feel relaxed. The cord was just really short and must have had a week area and that is why it tore. Within in 15 minutes of the birth he was nursing and looking up at me. I couldn’t believe I finally had him in my arms. The water was so bloody from all the blood that had come out of the cord and all of the regular blood so we got out of the tub and headed to the family bed.
I had torn a little but Jenny told me she wouldn’t stitch me if I would stay in bed for 3 days. That is not something that I had ever done but I really wanted to have a baby moon this time. I stayed in bed 4 days and it was wonderful getting to know my little man. He weighed in at 7lbs 14oz and 21 1/2 inches long. We named him Cyrus Austin Wayne.
A week after he was born I was having a really hard time processing everything. All of the what if’s were coming up. I feel that we made the right choice about homebirth and that his birth went just as it was supposed. The bag of waters slowed down the pushing which kept my cord from tearing while he was still inside. He is 2 ½ wks old now and is nursing great. He is a true miracle and we are so grateful to have him finally with us.
Congratulations on the birth of your son! I'm so glad that everything went well, and he is happy and healthy
Oh, Nicole, I just don't have any words to describe how your story hit me. I, too, have been afraid for you this whole time. Not for any good reason, just that after several losses it becomes hard to believe it will ever really go right again. And now to hear the story, and realize how badly things could have gone, and how they just didn't go that way, well, it just fills me w/ great joy! I am so happy for you and your family. Ben's Mommy suggested someone start a BAL thread (baby after loss). I think it's a great idea. You all could really give hope to others who've lost babies and gone on to have a healthy babe.
Awesome Mama...isn't it cool when you can see that everything happens the way its supposed to (re: the cord issue and bag of waters)...I'm glad you didn't get out of bed for 4 days - that sounds divine!
Wow what a great story... big hugs
and congrats to you!
Beautiful birth story. It's so cool your body knew how to birth the baby for his safety. I'm glad everything ended up being ok. That must have been so scary for you. Thank you so much for sharing your story! Congratulations!
Welcome, Little Cyrus!
What a great name! I LOVE it!
Way to listen to your body!