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I'm so sorry. I wish I had some great advice for you. I had a bad episiotomy with my 1st, only the problem was that he sewed me up too tight. "extra stitch for Dad, he said." So when I told him how painful it was at my checkup, I was lying on the table and he said," Kathleen, get me the scissors" and before I knew anything, he had cut me again! Still not as bad as yours, though. I also had an epidural gone bad for my 1st. I was wondering if it was just the epidural that was bad, or was the blood patch also bad? I refused the blood patch because they said there was potential for it to make the problem worse. I also couldn't stand the thought of going through the epidural procedure again.
Hugs, I hope this ends for you soon.
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