Caden Elias (a birth story) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 02:34 PM - Thread Starter
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Okay guys .. I wrote this this morning .. it's not sugarcoated and it's kind of a rambler but I had to get something down before I forgot all the details....

Well, right now it's 4 am and Caden is sleeping like a champ ... in fact he slept so good tonite, I was worried about him, and I couldn't sleep ... so anyway I'm up.

I'm trying to think how to write this birth story. I have to say that having this baby at home was harder than I thought it was going to be, but I am glad I went through with it.

I started having contractions saturday off and on, but only had a few so I wasn't sure if it meant anything. I knew that I felt cramping in my back which wasn't there with the painless braxton-hicks type "practice" contractions I had been having throughout my 3rd trimester. Saturday nite they were more frequent but still few and far between so I went to bed. I had a dream that a little boy came into my room. To tease him I said, "Hi Kai" knowing that he wasn't. He said I'm not Kai, I'm Caden! I laughed and pointed to my rounded belly and said "no you're not, this is Caden in here." Right after that I woke up to the sound of heavy breathing, which really creeped me out, since I was the only one in bed at the time. I thought it might be chad asleep on the couch in front of the TV, but he was in the back on the computer. I was having contractions about 10-12 minutes apart at that point. I think I woke myself up breathing through my own contractions in my sleep. This was about 430 am. I tried to go back to sleep after that but I couldn't get comfortable. I tossed and turned until about 6, when I realized that if I was going to eat something I had better do it, because my labor might make it too hard later. So I had some cold macaroni and some OJ (and then prayed it would stay down). Throughout the morning I labored, finding that standing and swaying was the best way to get through each contraction. I finished putting together my birth kit, since the one I ordered UPS from the midwife supply had been delayed because of bad weather (it's still not here!). I continued to feel most of the pain in my back. I tried the birth ball but that made it worse. I took a dose of castor oil, had a bm and shortly after lost my mucus plug. After that things started to intensify more so I went in the back and got in the tub - the water felt good but I wasn't comfortable lying down and Kai insisted that he was dirty and need to get in with me ... I didn't have the energy or the heart to dissuade him so then I had 4 yr old in the tub with me which made things even less comfortable (now I know why all those home birth videos have necked kids running around - they want to be like their moms!) I ended up back in my bathroom, in the shower, trying to get some privacy. Chad is still asleep at this point, he went to bed shortly after I got up and found him on the computer. It's about 10 now and I send Kai to wake him up and come in the bedroom. He helps me through my contractions by rubbing my back with the back massager and his hands and by putting the heating pad on my back. I remember leaning over the bed and moaning and him laughing and saying, "we'll have to try this again in about 2 months!" I didn't have the strength left to get mad. For a while I just lay on the bed on my side even though it really hurt to lie down, and chad rubbed my back and i dozed inbetween contractions. I wondered if I was in transition or just tired because I got up so early. After a while I would break away from chad and jump up during the second half of the contraction and pace the floor because I just couldn't lie down through it. It was like I was trying to run away from the pain but I couldn't stop myself. I kept running into the bathroom to urinate because the pressure on my bladder was intense. (Plus I was forcing myself to keep taking sips of water because I didn't want to get dehydrated.) I ended up laboring on the toilet, clutching the seat like I was riding a bucking bronco - I'm suprised I didn't tear it off the hinges. At some point my water broke with a "pop" and I felt up into my vagina to see if the cord had prolapsed. I could feel the baby's head which encouraged me and i felt a lot of wrinkly skin, but I didn't feel any cord. I jumped up and got in the shower. The contractions were horrible now, I kept thinking about how nice it would be to have an epidural, but I didn't want to transfer to the hospital. I just kept telling myself to hang in there, it can't last forever. I started giving myself counterpressure in the shower by reaching around and digging my nails into my spine as hard as I could. I realized the hot/cold water faucets were behind me and I lunged back against them and started screaming through my contractions, bellowing until I ran out of air. I guess the position of leaning back against the faucets and the screaming opened everything up and in 2 or 3 contractions the baby's head slammed down onto my perineum and then stuck there. I wanted him to come on out. I got out on the bathroom floor and chad came in to see what all the screaming was about. I'm on the floor yelling that the baby won't come out and I want to die, kill me now! I guess I was being a little over dramatic b/c I had been trying to keep it together in front of him this whole time so he wouldn't make me go the hospital. Now I was panicing, I was afraid that I had pushed too soon and I was too swollen for the baby to get out, because in the shower I had started bearing down with the contractions to help ease the pain even though I wasn't sure I was dilated all the way. Thank god, instead of calling an ambulance, he had the presence of mind to call my doula, Candi. I was out of my mind with the pain, because now not only did I have a bowling ball wedged between my legs, the contractions were still torturing me. Listening to Candi's soft, calming voice instantly brought me back to reality. She was like the angel of hope shining a light for me. She explained that my perineum needed time to stretch, helped me breath through a contraction and then told me I could get on my hands and knees and push with the next one if I wanted too. So I did. And with one big push Caden slipped out into the world, pink and wet and beautiful! I reached back between my legs and he dropped into my hands, then I quickly turned him over with his head pointed down so the fluid would drain from his mouth. He stared crying almost immediately! Chad had the phone and he told Candi "he's out!" I put the baby on my chest and covered him with a towel. Chad handed the phone back to me and I thanked Candi profusely - she was my guiding angel in my moment of doubt and I'll never forget it. It was about 1244 then and chad started making phone calls. (My mom has a recording on her answering machine of the baby crying and Chad annoucing "the baby's here".) After that everything was a blur. I was so glad to be holding my baby in my arms. My mom and sister and chad's mom came to see the baby and my son Kai welcomed his new brother. Caden didn't want to nurse at first and the placenta wouldn't come out, so I tied the cord with some dental tape I had pre-soaked in alcohol and then cut it with some sterilized scissors. It was mostly white at this point and only a couple drops of blood came out when I cut it. I got in the shower and tried to deliver the placenta but it obviously hadn't seperated yet. I ended up visiting and chilling out with my family for a while but then my mom started to get worried about the placenta being in there so long. Caden was gnawing his fists hungrily now so I put him to the breast and he took to it right away, no problem. After a few minutes I felt a gush of blood spill onto the pad under me. Candi called back to check on us and chad started to tell her the placenta wasn't out yet. I knew I had to get busy (or someone was going to make me go to the hospital after all) so I gave the baby to my mom, then knelt and pushed the placenta out onto the pad. It was much bigger than I expected. I sat back down and laughed as my sister inspected the placenta (she's in nursing school and taking OB nursing this semester). I asked her,"Is it dirty duncan or shiny shultz?" We agreed it was shiny side up and chad saved it for the Dr. to check out later. After that things settled down and everyone went home. Chad ordered us some food and Caden and I camped out on my bed and got some much deserved rest. It's been peachy ever since!

 nak.gif Mommy to fencing.gifKai 2/03, hammer.gifCaden 1/08, energy.gif Kara 10/09, angel1.gif 3/21/13, &

rainbow1284.gif baby.gif  Cole 2/3/14 ♡ Happily unmarried to geek.gif Papa since 2002 ♡

~We may not have it all together  but together we have it all~ uc.jpgsaynovax.gifgoorganic.jpgintactivist.giflactivist.gif 

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#2 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 03:15 PM
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Congratulations on your new baby! His and your birth story was beautiful, it made me cry. I hope I am as brave as you were/are. Once again a big congratulations!

A wife to A, unschoolen mom to C (7), T (3) & little A (9 months).
Hey Nena, I know you are creepen on me. privateeyes.gif  Get a life. 
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#3 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 03:36 PM
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Congratulations!!! Beautiful....
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#4 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 04:11 PM
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Beautiful story! Welcome Caden!
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#5 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 04:44 PM
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What a wonderful story. Congratulations on your new baby!!!!

Jaclyn, Madly in with DH, Scott. Mama to Calli Elizabeth (23 months) & our new little man, Bode Keam (9 weeks).
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#6 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 04:59 PM
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Beautiful! Made me cry too. Welcome Caden!
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#7 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 05:01 PM
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Congratulations! What a wonderful story.

Any misspellings or grammatical errors in the above statement are intentional;
they are placed there for the amusement of those who like to point them out.
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#8 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 05:09 PM
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Sprat , Certified Professional Midwife, loved very much by Sprig , the most loving and gentle man in the world, our little Sprout, and now someone new!
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#9 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 05:27 PM
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Aaw! Congrats mama! Welcome EarthSide Caden!

Mum to DS (8yrs), DD (6yrs), and DS(3.5yrs). kid.gif

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#10 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 06:39 PM
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Congrats! Enjoy your new babe!

Give more**Expect Less
There is no such thing as bad weather. Only bad clothing.
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#11 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 07:31 PM
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Enjoy your babymoon!

Crunchy, pagan, vegan,homeschooling wife and mother of 3 beautiful daughters and 2 wonderful sons

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#12 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 08:08 PM
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Congratulations! Way to go mama, Welcome Caden!
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#13 of 14 Old 01-15-2008, 08:17 PM
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congrats mama and bravo!!!

 Mom of many minions . . . babyf.gif jumpers.gif     jumpers.gif     jumpers.gif
"And when our baby stirs and struggles to be born it compels humility: what we began is now its own." Margaret Mead 
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#14 of 14 Old 01-17-2008, 03:04 AM
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Congrats mama and welcome to your precious Caden! You did a great job!
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