Weekly Chat Thread: June 23-30 - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 28 Old 06-23-2011, 04:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We don't seem to be getting much action in these threads, so I'm making this one until the end of the month, and then perhaps we should move over to monthly threads until things pick up in a few months?

 

I'm in need of a vent. 

 

DH is a paramedic. He only graduated last year, and he's been working for a private company, instead of our city paramedic service. It was a nice option to gain a bit of experience and references, but to be honest- the work sucks, it's not all that related to "real" paramedic work, it's completely unregulated (he's worked 128 hour pay periods, with none of that being overtime, and has never signed a contract), and.... his boss is a douchebag. The joke is that the only difference between God and "boss" is that God doesn't think he's "boss". (ie Boss thinks he's God...). 

 

A few weeks ago there was a hiring competition for the city paramedic service, and DH applied. It was a last minute thing, and he had to give away two of his shifts with his current company, one he took care of, and just let his boss know, and the other he had to call his boss for help to find someone to take it over. Other than this, I should add that DH has basically been the company slave for the past year-- they say jump, and he says how high. We've cancelled countless family outtings, camping trips, special ocassions because they've told him last minute they need him to work a shift. About 3-4 times they've given him less than a weeks notice (sometimes only a day) to say "hey we're sending you up north for two weeks, and no you don't have a choice". He booked off the day of my graduation 6 weeks in advance-- but then they called him the day before and said he was working, and when he said he couldn't, they flew off the handle about what a hardship they were putting him through... that kind of thing. He works all the jobs nobody else wants, constantly picks up extra hours when other guys call in sick, and give away shifts, or forget they were working (it's not uncommon for him to get a call at 630am saying so and so forgot they were working today, can he get dressed and get to the site adap!). And he always always always does these things. 

 

So anyways... he didn't think giving up two shifts (after a year of saving their butts...) would be a huge deal, but he got an email from his second in command boss telling him that he was extrememly disappointed in his attitude, and the obvious lack of respect for his current employer, and the fact that he was placing a future position ahead of his current one... that they questioned his true commitment and loyalty to the company, etc etc etc. It went on and on basically saying that they didn't feel they could count on him, and didn't trust that he had the company's best interests at heart. This was obviously a shock after everything he has done for them in the past year (on top of being one of the lowest paid employees...). I should also mention that it's not uncommon for employees to work for both the city and this private company. About 50% or more of them do work for both. 

 

And then things blew over.... he hasn't heard anything. Until today when the July schedule came out, and he wasn't on it. At all. Not even once. And he's been working full time or over full time for a solid year. They didn't even bother to tell him, or to call him in for a warning or anything, just sent the schedule and waiting for him to flip. So he called his second in command boss (nobody 'bothers' big boss) and asked for an explanation, and was assured that he wasn't being fired, they were just concerned about the past month and thought he "needed to take a step back and evaluate whether he wanted to stay with the company, and that they would see what happened in August."

 

Kablammy. No notice, and then essentially fired him, laid him off, whatever. They want him to work his next five days of shifts, and then they don't have any work for him until at least August... if they decide that they will give him shifts at that point. 

 

I'm just so angry about the whole thing. I'm not worried financially... We put pretty much one of our whole incomes in the bank every month, plus we have about $10,000 in savings, and a $25,000 line of credit... plus DH will be able to find another job soon-- he's had tons of people offer to hook him up already. And it's not even that I'm angry he's not working-- we've got tons of stuff around the house and yard for him to easily spend the next several weeks just getting it 'ready for baby'. We've been planning on finishing the basement of our house-- but haven't had time. Now he can do that while he's looking for a new job. We'll be able to actually see each other a bit this summer... take a weekend off here and there and go camping etc. Plus-- a new job will have somewhat set hours, a contract, an HR department, likely a health plan, and... not the the "god boss". And-- even in a non-paramedicine job, he'll still probably be doing more paramedic work than he currently is (think the paramedics that attend concerts, or football games, that's the type of stuff he's doing right now). 

 

So really... him NOT working for the company, is a complete blessing. I've been trying to convince him to quit for weeks... months even. I'm just so angry at how it's happening. The fact that they are trying to turn this around as his lack of commitment or dedication to the company is a joke. And the fact that they so publicly sent out a schedule that did not include him at all-- he was pretty much the last to know-- all his coworkers know that he just all of a sudden isn't schedule for the entire month of July. He's mortified. And of course he's worried about the fall out in terms of references and the like. It's just... so stupid. 

 

Anyways.,.. like I said, I just needed to vent, and normally I call my mother to vent, but I know DH is sensitive about this, and wouldn't want her to know about how it's all going down, so I just needed to get it out there. I'm trying to convince him to call them tonight and say he quits, and they will need to cover the rest of his shifts, but he's not sure yet. Then we could go camping this weekend and let some stress off. I have the whole weekend off. 

 

Gah!

 

SO..... anything interesting happening with anyone else? I can't be the only one with a crazy life. 


Doula mama, medic daddy and Tenley Harper born naturally 11/29/11 delayedvax.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFcd.gif

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#2 of 28 Old 06-23-2011, 04:46 PM
 
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What a bunch of jerks!! I'd be tempted to finish out the week, wait the month, by which time it sounds like he could have a new job, and not bother mentioning to them until they've sent out the August schedule that, oops! he doesn't work for them anymore! Except it sounds like they rely on him so much that they'll have to eat their words before August rolls around.

 

I'm having employment issues this week, too. I had to tell my daycare girl's mom on Tuesday that she can't come here until she is lice/nit free. On Wednesday, she got the grandma to pick her up from school (yes, she went to school with LICE! Again!) and today I didn't hear from them, but the secretary said she called in sick, so hopefully they're taking care of it! I think the mom is upset with me... I guess I will find out in a  day or two if I still have a daycare kid! I don't have her over the summer & there's only 4 days left of school, so financially it's not much of a difference (if having her here meant re-infestation, it could be cheaper this way!) SO is a school bus driver, so we have to prepare for a few lean months in the summers anyway, we're ready.

 

My son had a field trip today and I had totally misread the permission slip... I thought it said for them to be at school promptly at 8:51 (they start school at 8:50) and I thought "That's weird... must be a typo... I guess they have to put in that kids need to be on time though... some parents!" Well imagine my surprise when the phone rang at 8:10 this morning, and the secretary is saying the bus leaves in 5 minutes, where's your DS? Luckily he was ready to go, so I sent him running up the street to catch it! We live a few houses from the school.

 

I made plans today with a friend who we always say "We should get together soon, I haven't seen you in forever!" so I'm excited about that. They're coming over for a barbecue :) She told me we HAVE to start seeing each other regularly before the baby comes, because she doesn't want to feel like another lookie-loo when she comes over to see it! We always have a blast when we do get together. Shopping for a new barbecue has been on my To-Do list since we moved, so I guess we have a deadline now!

 

 


~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.

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#3 of 28 Old 06-23-2011, 05:30 PM
 
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Man, I'd be furious too!! *hugs*

 

The construction on our house has begun, just in time for the rain to come pouring down! We're rebuilding a sunroom and making it open to the kitchen, which will be lovely - I can't wait for it to be done :-) The current sunroom is a two story structure, that has a workroom with a door to the furnace/laundry room on the basement level, and a door to the powder room on the main floor level (yep, the access to the sunroom was through a bathroom - old houses are so cool LOL) So yesterday, just after the worker guys left, it started POURING. At this point, the second level, with the access to the bathroom, has been totally demoed, and they had begun taking down the first level, with the access to the basement. And the water came pouring in under both of those doors. My husband went out in the pouring rain to try to at least drape some tarps over the open spots where the water was coming down into the (former) workroom and then flowing under the door into the basement, and I was on towel brigade in the powder room especially. He tucked the edge of one of the tarps up in front of the powder room door on the outside, and that seemed to help a bit, as did the fact that the wet wood of the door and sill swelled quite a bit.

 

I emailed the contractor last night, and he just got the message tonight (not totally his fault, I know he isn't the greatest about reading his email, so if we'd continued to have trouble today I would have called him) and if we have any more water coming in at all, he'll be out tomorrow to put up plastic sheeting over the doors.

 

I know I'll love the space when it's done, but wow. Day three and I'm already ready for it to be finished.


I'm Heather, newly married (12/5/10) to James! partners.gif
We are currently "mama" and "papa" to Maisy cat.gif and soon... parents to BABY NEW YEAR 2012!! babyf.gifWe're happily planning a h20homebirth.gif and intend to femalesling.GIFbfinfant.gifdiaper.gif

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#4 of 28 Old 06-23-2011, 07:22 PM
 
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When I worked as a paramedic- it was much the same if you didn't get into the right setting.  I got burned out on the BS and took off for Alaska- it was amazing working there, and you really had to be on your toes.  Loved it.  :P  If ever you guys want an adventure- it's a great place to work in that field. 

 

Beyond that, I am really sorry your DH has to deal with that- ick!

 

We're doing ok here- some of the closing costs on the house had been miscalculated so we're needing to pull more money out than we were initially told, but that's ok.  We'll manage, but it will make for a tighter couple weeks than I would like! (Nothing like being told- hey- we need an extra 5K in 2 days....!  at 5 pm on a Thursday, no less.) I sought comfort in a yummy cold cucumber salad for dinner- life is suddenly all better. :D

 

 

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#5 of 28 Old 06-23-2011, 08:03 PM
 
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Sorry about all the craziness, Jenine Jessica - I hope things settle down soon!

 

I am super tired right now, I am sick again :-( This time its a nasty sinus infection...started antibiotics yesterday, and I'm a little less weak and lightheaded today (I almost passed out driving home from work yesterday), but, exhausted still and I can't hear out of my right ear really at all.

 

The fun thing here is that my "little" brother is competing in the World Freestyle Kayak Championships this week, and he is currently 5th (which was the cut off for the final rounds) so he will finish no worse than that, hopefully, he will do even better! I'm super proud of him and it has been a fun family affair getting up all wierd times of day/ngiht (he's in Germany and we are in the US) to watch him compete live! Of course, the whole staying up for a couple hours in the middle of the night thing probably isn't helping my recover lol...but, its worth it.

 

I'm up to like 6lbs gained now...but, thats still better than my previous pregnancies, so I am hoping this is a good sign!

 

Oh, and I am working on my application for grad school now, trying to get in for August - looks like the second 8wks end on Dec 21st, so now I am hoping baby comes at least a week late (I'm due the 15th) lol!

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#6 of 28 Old 06-23-2011, 08:23 PM
 
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These employment issues sound SO frustrating!
My DH's company is working on some really big name contracts, which basically mean I won't see him except sometimes in bed for the next few months. At least they're giving him a raise!

I'm having some food issues:
We went to a party this week, and I cycled there, up a monster hill, and I was so hungry when I arrived. DH was going to the store, so I mentioned that I wanted to eat a chicken sandwich. He got excited that I was having a "food craving", and told his friends, who also got excited. You know how everyone wants to be involved with what's happening with the pregnant lady. The thing is, I don't feel like I have food cravings. I feel like, oh, I'm hungry, and something actually sounds good, that's what I'll eat! But it just feels like normal eating to me. And I guess the trouble is, I feel really embarrassed about having attention drawn to my eating, pregnant or not. It makes me feel really body-conscious, as if massive breasts and a chubby belly didn't do that enough!
Anyway, DH and I worked it out, and he agreed not to draw attention to my eating, even though he thinks I'm quite strange. I guess I am! And I got my chicken sandwich that night. smile.gif

The other thing is that I realized I'm not eating nearly enough. I'm little, and fairly inactive, and non pregnant, I only need about 1200 calories per day. I found an awesome pregnancy calorie calculator that tells you what you need based on your size, activity level, and trimester of pregnancy (because if I ate the recommended 2400 calories, I'd be the size of a house in a month!), and it says I need about 1600 now. I've been eating close to 1200, but also waking up with massive headaches that eating cures. The trouble is, I just cant figure out how to eat that much! I'm still rather limited as to what doesn't make me feel sick (though its MUCH better), and all I really want to eat is fresh fruit and veg, which is really low on the calories! Ive been trying to add so more grains and a good amount of dairy to round it off....but this is going to become much more of a challenge as baby grows and wants more!
It's just so strange, after living my whole life conscious that I dont eat too much, now I'm struggling to eat more! My 19-year-old self longed for this!

Maker-mama, joyously loving my boy, Winter Rhys, born 12/2011, and our twins, Wren and Forest, born 4/2014.
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#7 of 28 Old 06-24-2011, 07:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm the same way with food 'cravings'. Sure I have cravings-- but not anything stronger or weirder than I got -before- I was pregnant! Yes sometimes I really want pizza, or would kill for a glass of pepsi... but that's me normally too... it's just funny seeing how people make such a big deal out of it now that it's a "pregnancy symptom"!

 

I've wondered if I'm not eating enough either, but from start to week 16 I'd only gained 4-5lbs, and now at 17w1d, I'm all of a sudden up almost another 3-4lbs. I'm not sure what happened this week, ubt maybe I'll stop worrying about it, and just eat when I'm hungry. I started this pregnancy at a healthy, slightly low weight, but with a high fat concentration around my belly and thighs so I'm trying to make sure that if I'm gaining any weight, it's baby, boobs, placenta, etc, and not extra fat I'm piling on. I'm like you, and more sedentary than I should be, so I don't need to contend with extra fat- weight is fine, fat no. 

 

DH is working hopefully his last shift right now, and then when he gets home I think we're going to go to the grocery store quickly, then head out to my father's trailer/campsite for the weekend, and it sounds like we'll even be alone. It'll be good to get away from it for awhile and just breathe. It honestly seems like it's been years since I've seen him for more than half a day at a time. 

 

insidevoice-- that's part of the problem is the burnout. He's working crazy stupid hours, sometimes to the point of like 4-8 hour shifts... but for 21 days straight without a break... but none of it, or almost none of it, is actual work that is related to paramedicine-- it's things like people walking up needing a bandaid, or with a stomach ache... and so he's been getting to the point where he keeps saying he doesn't know if he even wants to be a paramedic anymore. And it's because this job isn't really -being- a paramedic. So yes... it will be nice for him to go to a job where he actually feels like he's making a difference again. 

 

 

In other news-- It's been so exciting to really and truly be feeling the baby move the last few days. Feeling it now and realizing that this is definately baby moves, I'm realizing that it has been baby movements since about week 15, I just was a bit in denial. It's so interesting feeling it, and can't wait until I can pick out individual movements and kicks etc. 


Doula mama, medic daddy and Tenley Harper born naturally 11/29/11 delayedvax.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFcd.gif

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#8 of 28 Old 06-24-2011, 09:08 AM
 
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Azadehhast: I definitely feel like I'm the same way.  My last doctor visit was last week, about 13 weeks along, and I lost 3 pounds and I haven't been sick.  I also haven't really been working out.  I just walk the dogs.  I got a club sandwich for lunch and could only manage to eat half and I went out for breakfast and got two pancakes and could only eat half.  I just can't manage to eat very much at once.  Then I'm not hungry until the next regular meal.  So, the whole eat a bunch of small meals doesn't work.  I still haven't gained any weight.  I'm not too concerned yet, but we'll see.

 

One a different note; you know the saying, "when it rains it pours".  That's what's happening to me now.  We just bought a new car and we took my husbands car in to get some maitenance done and his car is in sad shape.  We knew the shocks were getting bad, but we didn't think we had to replace them.  I guess the shocks are so bad they've worn down the tires in weird patterns.  So we need new shocks and struts, new tires, and a head gasket is leaking!  Also last time someone put in spark plug wrong and that has to be replaced.  So, the coolant and oil are leaking because of the head gasket.  Also, his car is all wheel drive so everything is twice as expensive!  So we now have a huge bill!  Also, we want to have the birth at a birth center and we're expecting to have to pay out of pocket, unless he manages to get a job where they have the right health coverage.  So, that may be about 4,000 for that.  The car bill is about 4,000, they said they can pretty much guarantee the car will last another 150,000 miles.  Plus just buying a new car...irked.gif.  Oh, plus we're moving and have to pay for that too.  We just can't win.  

 

Good thingsorngbiggrin.gif:  I'm not tired anymore!  I bought some new maternity clothes that I'm excited about.  I got a new job and I love the people I work with, plus I only work 6 hours at a time and it's not super boring!  It's sooo nice to not have to work full time!  That was a killer in the beginning.  


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#9 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 07:56 AM
 
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ugh , i had a wonderful day off with the dp and ended up sleeping most of it! i was so exhausted.  my energy level has been high to normal lately but it was like id been hit with a ton of bricks.  baby must be going through a growth spurt.  all i want to eat is fruit fruit and fruit! oranges especially and seltzer.  i dont even normally like seltzer.  i am so impatient i want to feel the baby move!  we are doing a very hands off approach to this pregnancy and im hoping that everything goes normally.  my dp had a baby abour 7 or 8 years ago now with another girl but it was stillborn at 7 months from gastroentrsis where the intestines dont go fully into the belly, so needless to say ive been having nightmares about it.  very worried.  i dont know if he could handle another stillborn kid, especially since his mother just passed almost 2 months ago.  trying to not let it get to me too much. 

 

im also having employment issues.  i feel like my boss has suddenly turned on me in almost jealousy?   she never had kids and had wanted them, so im getting an aggressive feeling from her among other things like her lying and manipulating about my pay and raises etc etc so i am very much looking for work, i have a couple options lined up doing flowers with very nice wonderful people.  who actually understand design! god my bosses arrangements are a mess, if she did my wedding i would chew her out its sooo SLOPPY!  she never learned how to tie a ribbon wrap on a bqt, and they are an absolute mess. her big arrangements have huge holes in them, its a miracle this women is in buisness im glad im leaving.  plus the shop is filthy ( the whole back smells like decaying dead rats )and she has a stinky somewhat violent 44 year old schizophrenic who lives in the shop and hes held people up on the street with flower knifes and gone to jail!!! oh the things you find out!

 

 

get me OUT!


 heartbeat.gifMomma to baby boy Ember.babyf.gifborn at home 12/22/11.  Madly loving his daddy Thimble guitar.gif since 6/26/09. 

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#10 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 08:39 AM
 
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rustydaisies~ that sounds like a movie! I'm glad you have other options!

 

Yesterday, both the kids had birthday parties that started at the same time. The families live a few doors down from each other, but one of the parties was at a lazer tag place. I called and asked if my son could go along in the car with his friend, and they had room. I did a ton of walking while the kids were at their parties and then picked them back up and we walked home. So glad that worked out! SO came home from work, and we went to Home Depot to get a barbecue. Blobby LOVES steak... usually I can take it or leave it, but yesterday I cleaned DD's plate after eating my whole meal. And citrus... I've been drinking lemonade and orange juice like crazy.

 

Did I tell you guys about Friday? DD fell on the playground after school and bashed her cheek on a wooden retaining wall. Her cheek swelled up so huge! And it's all purple. She looks like Violet Beauregard in Charlie and the Chocolate factory, when she's turning onto a blueberry! We went to emergency in SO's school bus, because he had to go back to work, DS was pretty impressed by that. She had a concussion and we had to wake her up all night. The first wake-up, SO went int here and he was asking "What's my name?" and she was saying "Caitlin" then she refused to tell him her name. I couldn't figure out if she was being stubborn because she thought the questions were dumb, or of she was getting defensive because they were actually confusing her. I grabbed her out of bed & told her she wasn't getting back in until she answered my questions, went to her brothers room and said "Who's that?" "Where are we?" and she said Roland, Rolands room. Phew! She kept telling me how annoying I am the rest of the night, but she answered everything right away.

 

I'm 34 today! Mom is taking me out for lunch and to get a hanging basket :)

 


~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.

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#11 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 09:41 AM
 
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We had a fairly quiet weekend but I am SOO TIRED!!  My kids have gone on sleep-strike lately, I think in part because the days are so long.  Couple that with middle of the night thunderstorms and a nearly 3 year old who is suddenly terrified of storms, and I'm running on about 3-4 hours of sleep a night.  Ugh. Hopefully the sleep problems will end soon because I am getting really irritable and am not the parent I want to be at all.  Patience?  Pft, not today. 

 

In general though things are going pretty well.  Still in my normal clothes (including the jeans I am wearing today) and not having a problem with that, though I am beginning to feel like I swallowed a slowly inflating balloon.   Nothing visible though. 

 

It's supposed to reach the 90s this week, so I am really hoping the community pool repairs are done so we can head  to that soon.  Oh, and i want to use water to burn off energy so maybe the little guys will sleep at night.  ACK!!!

 

On a positive note, I made two birthday cakes for my mom- both ice cream rolls, one was vanilla with maple nut filling and the other was chocolate with black cherry.  I may have had more cake than I really should have... nom nom nom... 

 

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#12 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 10:06 AM
 
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Happy birthday Mummoth!!! Oh, poor little girl and her prize fighter cheek. You should definitely get a photo of this for childhood memories.

We've had some shocking news In my family. My mother's oldest (of 9) brother was murdered in Saturday. Wow, murdered. He got in a yelling match with some man over his (my uncle's) girlfriend, and the man pulled out a gun and shot him. In Texas, because if there's anywhere in the US where someone will shoot you at a yelling match, it's Texas. Needless to say, the whole family is mourning and in shock. For me, I didn't know this uncle well, and don't have many memories of him; mostly I have everyone else's memories, but still, the whole thing is incredible. So please, send wishes of peace for my mother, her sibs, and my cousins.

In a very different note: I talked to my dad about baby things yesterday, and finally concluded that men just don't get nearly as excited as women do about the magic of making babies, and its because, I think, they dont have the experience of it. Other women know the wonder of first feeling movement, or belly and breasts rapidly expanding, and the magic of feeling miserable and from that misery coming a new person. But not men. Realizing this makes me give DH some grace for not being as amazed by it all as I am.

And, the fickleness of fundal height: I am absolutely positive if my dates, but here I am at 15 weeks and my fundus is an inch below my navel (it should be halfway between navel and pubic bone at 16 weeks). I'm also only 5 feet tall, but I still have to grow a normal sized baby. So it just shows me the sillinesses of the "supposed to bes", since our bodies are all so wonderfully different.

Maker-mama, joyously loving my boy, Winter Rhys, born 12/2011, and our twins, Wren and Forest, born 4/2014.
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#13 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 01:46 PM
 
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Oh yep, we took a picture that night! The bruising was worse the next day, and the swelling has gone down a fair bit now. Her brother insisted that we go to the candy store for gum balls, so she could hold one in her other cheek and even her face out! It was her show and tell today, she walked to school with both her hands covering it, so she could do a grand unveiling for her class:

 

Photo47-1.jpg

 

So sorry to hear about your uncle. It's tough even when you aren't close to the person, when someone like your mom was... you don't want her to be grieving! Your DH will get more excited when it's obvious that something is happening in there... when he can feel or even SEE it move. It just takes them longer to get into it, it's like they need proof or something.


~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.

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#14 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 02:21 PM
 
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Oh my gosh!  What a big bump!  She looks like she handled it well though... 

 

 

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#15 of 28 Old 06-27-2011, 03:15 PM
 
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I heard the heart beat today for the first time!!! Yay!! :love: And took a video so my husband could hear too. My midwife was chuckling about it - I had to put my clothes all back together again and run out to the car to get my cellphone to use the camera.

 

It was hands down The Coolest Thing I've Ever Heard!! Grow baby grow!!


I'm Heather, newly married (12/5/10) to James! partners.gif
We are currently "mama" and "papa" to Maisy cat.gif and soon... parents to BABY NEW YEAR 2012!! babyf.gifWe're happily planning a h20homebirth.gif and intend to femalesling.GIFbfinfant.gifdiaper.gif

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#16 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 06:01 AM
 
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Wow.  There has been a lot going on here lately.  First,

Happy (belated) Birthday, Mummoth!  I hope it was a good one. AND - I couldn't imagine intentionally sending my child anywhere at all while carrying head lice.  We have been exposed twice now (by my nieces & nephews - apparently my sibs don't think it's a big deal to spread the stuff around) and wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy!  I think this parent has no right to be offended, if that is the case.  About the bump:  we've been using arnica cream/gel/tablets in our family  and it helps a lot with pain and swelling. 

 

JenineJessica - Employers who treat their employees that way do not hold on to quality employees for long, so they're only hurting themselves.  I hope your DH will find a position with a company that can appreciate his dedication.  ((HUGS)) ... My DP and I have some experience with crappy employers, so I know the frustration and anxiety that it can stir up. 

 

Futuremamaheather - I hope your remodeling is finished soon and you don't have to deal with any more water issues.  We're getting ready to start a big project and I hope it goes smoothly and quickly.  DP is replacing the floor in three rooms, though, and adding a half-bathroom upstairs.  And new cabinets in the kitchen. I keep trying to think of ways to avoid having to stay somewhere else with the kiddos while he works ...  YAY on hearing baby's heartbeat!!  It's exciting.  My new midwives get almost as excited as I do - totally normal to be fascinated with the stirrings of life!!!

 

My 2yo is asking for me.  To be continued ...

 

 

 

 

 


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#17 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 09:05 AM
 
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Wow Mummoth, what a bump that is.  Sounds like a lot of crazy things going on.  I'm sorry to hear about your uncle Azadehhast.  Things have been looking up for us.  We went over some finances after the insanely expensive car repair bill and we'll be fine!  What a relief because we're planning a road trip for the end of august and into september.  We're going to hit a whole bunch of National Parks out west.  I'm so excited!  Hopefully we'll hit Yellowstone, Glacier, North Cascades, Olympic Peninsula, Crater Lake, Redwoods, visit my sis in San Fran and then Yosemite.  One last big trip before baby.  My anxiety about health care is pretty well gone as well.  Now I just need to focus on the move and finding an apartment for us in Denver.  

 

I'm still not showing, but I think I've finally gained a pound, or at least my shorts are getting tighter.  So, I'm still not in maternity clothes at 14.5 weeks.  I guess that's alright since I still haven't bought maternity shorts.  I can't find any I like.  The ones at motherhood are so short or tight.  I like the bermuda style(to the knees), but with a wider leg.  Any suggestions?    


Married to my love.  Expecting #1, EDD:12/23!  Hoping for a waterbirth.jpg at a birth center.

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#18 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 11:03 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ccsunflower View Post

  My anxiety about health care is pretty well gone as well.  Now I just need to focus on the move and finding an apartment for us in Denver.  

 

 



Denver!  What a great place!  do you have a Doula?   or are you looking for one, a really great friend of mine is a fabulous doula and if  you want her info pm me : )  also you are "due" a day after me : )  


 heartbeat.gifMomma to baby boy Ember.babyf.gifborn at home 12/22/11.  Madly loving his daddy Thimble guitar.gif since 6/26/09. 

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#19 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 11:23 AM
 
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Ccsunflower: I don't know how familiar you are with Denver, so I just wanted to mention my experience with finding apartments from a distance. While I still lived in Germany, I used craigslist and google street view to find a place in Vancouver, and it worked out so well. You can put in the address of the place you're thinking of, and go to street view, and see what kind of neighborhood it is, in terms of greenness, dirtiness, graffiti, and much more easily avoid the yuckier parts of town that you might not have known about otherwise. Good luck!

Maker-mama, joyously loving my boy, Winter Rhys, born 12/2011, and our twins, Wren and Forest, born 4/2014.
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#20 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 01:06 PM
 
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I just got back from a midwife appointment and wow! Have things ever changed since I had my first two kids! She told me she's required to offer me a consult with an OB because of my weight (I'm fat) I asked what the OB would do and she said they'd probably have some nutrition information for during the pregnancy and tell me I should lose weight postpartum, and there'd probably be a lot of statistical information. She said that OB's recommend that overweight women (and she stopped and told me this won't be the case for me, I've had two normal healthy births, and she absolutely considers me a candidate for another home birth) INDUCE at 40 weeks!! ON the due date?! I was totally gobsmacked! Apparently, there's a slightly higher risk of having a still birth if you're over weight. I said I think there's a much, much higher risk of complications from an unnecessary induction than there is from me being fat. I said I don't think my weight postpartum is any of their business or concern! I asked if I could have a consult with a nutritionist instead, because I felt that I'd get much more information about nutrition from them and a lot less fear mongering about birth! The midwife was in full support of that decision and put in a referral for me to see a nutritionist. My BP was 120/70, the baby's heart beat was 150, and I'd lost another 2 pounds.


~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.

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#21 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 03:16 PM
 
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I've been following, but hardly time to post. I've been taking 2 summer courses that are keeping me sooo busy.

 

I had an appt last week, heard the HB, and we have a u/s appt in 4 weeks (and we're finding out the sex, for sure!)

 

I feel baby move all the time. Yesterday I felt "her" right under my navel! Usually its way down low. DF has felt "her" a few times here and there too :)


 In Love stillheart.gif with my best friend & mama to three beautiful little boys! stork-suprise.gif Expecting #4 Oct. 2014!
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#22 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 05:08 PM
 
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I think for now we're going with the birth center and if not we're going to try for a home birth, but if we end up needing a doula I'll definitely let you know!  I began looking at places in Denver and I found a really nice house to rent but I e-mailed the person and they said they were in South Africa and they had the keys so I couldn't see it.  They couldn't speak english well.  It seemed really sketchy so I didn't reply.  I have a friend who lives in Denver who couldn't maybe check some places out for me.  So, hopefully we can find something nice.


Married to my love.  Expecting #1, EDD:12/23!  Hoping for a waterbirth.jpg at a birth center.

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#23 of 28 Old 06-28-2011, 07:07 PM
 
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WOW, Mummoth. That is just OUTRAGEOUS to me!! I had appointments with my midwife and my primary care physician (to establish care with a new one) yesterday, and they were like night and day. I left my midwife feeling warm and fuzzy (we'd had a nice chat and heard the heartbeat for the first time - it wasn't an official appointment) and left my new pcp feeling vaguely pissed off and uneasy. And this doc is on the crunchy side! She totally freaked out about my blood pressure, which wasn't even high, just "borderline", and this after I told her I get "white coat syndrome" too. The lower number was totally fine, the top number was on the high end of normal. Which, by the way, happened at my midwife's office two weeks ago. She just chatted with me for a few minutes, told me to imagine I was at the beach, and took it again. It was fine. Fortunately, my midwife had warned me that this doc can be like that sometimes - very crunchy and open to alternative stuff, but also very intense and "This Is A Big Problem". So I don't know. I'm walking more and drinking more, which were her recommendations, because they're good to do anyway, and pondering what I want to do about primary care docs. *sigh* We'll see what happens when my blood work comes in.

 

Anyway, it is just nuts to induce at 40 weeks on the dot for no reason other than the weight of the mom!! As an overweight woman myself, this is one of the reasons I chose to have a midwife accompany me through pregnancy and birth. The hysteria and scare tactics make me crazy. I'm glad that your midwife is treating you like the individual you are, and not a statistic.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mummoth View Post

I just got back from a midwife appointment and wow! Have things ever changed since I had my first two kids! She told me she's required to offer me a consult with an OB because of my weight (I'm fat) I asked what the OB would do and she said they'd probably have some nutrition information for during the pregnancy and tell me I should lose weight postpartum, and there'd probably be a lot of statistical information. She said that OB's recommend that overweight women (and she stopped and told me this won't be the case for me, I've had two normal healthy births, and she absolutely considers me a candidate for another home birth) INDUCE at 40 weeks!! ON the due date?! I was totally gobsmacked! Apparently, there's a slightly higher risk of having a still birth if you're over weight. I said I think there's a much, much higher risk of complications from an unnecessary induction than there is from me being fat. I said I don't think my weight postpartum is any of their business or concern! I asked if I could have a consult with a nutritionist instead, because I felt that I'd get much more information about nutrition from them and a lot less fear mongering about birth! The midwife was in full support of that decision and put in a referral for me to see a nutritionist. My BP was 120/70, the baby's heart beat was 150, and I'd lost another 2 pounds.



 


I'm Heather, newly married (12/5/10) to James! partners.gif
We are currently "mama" and "papa" to Maisy cat.gif and soon... parents to BABY NEW YEAR 2012!! babyf.gifWe're happily planning a h20homebirth.gif and intend to femalesling.GIFbfinfant.gifdiaper.gif

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#24 of 28 Old 06-29-2011, 07:43 AM
 
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JenineJessica - what jerks! I got "fired" from a job in a very similar fashion - slaving for them for about 3 years as the lowest man on the totem pole, then they sent a new secretary down to tell me they just didn't have any more work for me, and tried to blame it on me. Despite the fact that I'd put in unpaid overtime, come in early, stayed late, never showed up late or left early, rarely called in sick, and saved their sorry butts so many times. They did that in an attempt to prevent me filing for unemployment, but ha on them, it didn't work. It was easily the best thing that ever happened to me, but at the time, it felt crappy and was sooo unfair. THEY were the jerks, and I wanted the pleasure of quitting, you know? I'm sorry you guys are going through that - it's just a crappy feeling.

Last week, I did some serious deep cleaning in the kids room to make room for another dresser, and accomplished that (yay) and this week, we're reorganizing and cleaning out the homeschool room in preparation for the new school year, which we'll start Aug 1.

I finally have some energy back, and my inventory levels are soooo low from being too tired to do much for the last 3 months... I've got some super busy months ahead of me to get enough inventory built up to last through March or so... Yikes. I almost can't think about it, it's so overwhelming. So I've been putting in some intense afternoons working.

This makes life boring for the kids, but they're coping. For August, at least, I'll have my niece here once or twice a week in the afternoons to hang out with the kids outside so I can get some work done. I think that'll help.

Having trouble finding modest, cute maternity skirts that I can afford that aren't denim. Yes, I know I can make some, but a) it's nice to actually buy clothes from time to time, you know? and b) see the aforementioned low inventory levels. I'm not sure I can take time to sew for myself when I really ought to be sewing for the store. And ALL of my maternity skirts are ones I've made. I really would not mind just buying a few.

Azadehhast - so sorry about your uncle. That's tough.

mummoth - good for you about the nutritionist!

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#25 of 28 Old 06-29-2011, 10:05 AM
 
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Heather~ even my mom thought it was crazy, and she tends to believe 'Dr. knows best'... though she thinks a midwife/hospital birth would be the best of both worlds. She sort of surprised me by knowing that an induction increases your chances of needing a c-section. We know a woman who had a c-section whens he was overweight and then got an infection, so she cane tot he conclusion that it's more important to avoid a c-section if you're overweight. GO MOM!!

 

Saratar~ thanks! I figure everyone could learn a little bit more about nutrition, and the information I get there will be good for my whole family. I can always consult with an OB later if I get high blood pressure or GD or some other problem.

 

ccsunflower~ that does sound pretty sketchy. When you find a good place, you'll know. When I was with XH,w e rented out our basement and the gut feeling I got from people was always right (unfortunately, I didn't listen to it and we ended up with tenants who did bone head things like leaving their Christmas tree propped up against the furnace)

 

I'm pretty happy with my midwives so far... she actually discouraged me from taking the GD test! SO has diabetes and I mentioned hat I've tested myself a few times just to see what my blood sugar was, and she suggested that since the stuff is available to me, I could just test regularly and monitor it myself. 


~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.

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#26 of 28 Old 06-29-2011, 11:43 AM
 
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Hi everyone - I don't really post much, but I do try to keep up with you all!  I too have enjoyed feeling regular movement and am so excited to find out the gender next week!  We already have a boy and a girl, but it is so fun to start finalizing names, etc.   Nothing to really  PREPARE per say...we don't do a nursery and already have most everything we will need since my older ones are only 3 and 1yrs old.  A few weeks ago I night weaned my very stubborn 16 month old with much apprehension, but I felt it was really necessary.  She totally surprised me!  It was a great success and really quite smooth.  Best part is that she usually sleeps through the whole night now without a  PEEP and still sleeps right next to me!  I love all the morning snuggles now as we just don't nurse in bed at all anymore.  Dr Jay Gordons Method is the best I think...it has worked well for both children.  http://www.drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html  

 


DS1 2/08, DD 1/10, DS2 12/11...#4 EDD 10/24 

Home schooling, home birthing, breastfeeding, bed sharing family!

 

 

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#27 of 28 Old 06-30-2011, 06:18 PM
 
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Mummoth.. that is soooo weird! I'm overweight, but I've never had any issues except one midwife who did the math wrong and said I had gained like 18 lbs in a month, when in reality I gained 18lbs the entire pregnancy.. lol that's strange!

 


creative crunchy christian wife to J stillheart.gif, Mama to three boys and one baby on the way!  chicken3.gif  doula in training love.gif

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#28 of 28 Old 07-01-2011, 05:01 AM
 
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I had a dream about the baby last night.  I could see the baby's shape through my skin along the left side of my abdomen.  The baby started sliding downward and just slipped right out, dangling at my legs.  I grabbed the baby and babe was fine but very small.  Smiled at me with closed eyes. 

 

This morning when I woke I rolled onto my back and felt the baby move for the first time.  It was on the left side of my abdomen, down low.  luxlove.gif


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