Anyone else starting to stress more? - Mothering Forums

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Old 08-11-2011, 07:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I do have a history of PPD/OCD/GAD and I am under a lot more pressure at work right now...but, I also always seem to get more stressed around 24-26 weeks...I think it just seems so much more "real" now...and so much closer...

 

I am just starting to panic about everything...breastfeeding, pumping, keeping my house in order, having time for everyone, paying for Christmas (we don't spend much at all, but, that just means I really don't want to reduce what we spend), paying for daycare, paying for all the baby stuff we still need (which all of the sudden seems like a lot even though I really have finished most of the big item shopping)... I can just feel my blood pressure go up even as I write this.

 

Just wondering if anyone else is going through this right now...this is when I went back on meds with DS2 but I am too afraid to take anything now that more warnings and stuff seem to be coming out...that and I am really just hoping this is "normal stress" and it probably is because I have plenty of happy care free times too... I know from therapy that if I can take care of the things I am concerned/obessing over than I will let go and be ok, but, some of this I just can't take care of right now!

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Old 08-12-2011, 10:37 AM
 
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Yes....I think it's "normal stress"...I definitely am worried over the same things you mentioned.  I feel like I have nothing, though!  I haven't even started researching what I want.  Lack of money right now is a big part of that.  Anyway, I'm not to the point where I'm feeling anxiety, just worrying and knowing that it'll all get done by the time babe gets here.  I feel like the Fall will be my big nesting time.  I bake/cook a lot in the Fall and my son will be in school, so I'll have time to go carseat/furniture shopping then.  Also, to help ease my stress, I buy something for baby every time I go shopping ( I do a bi-monthly shopping trip).  It's usually Swaddlers and some long sleeved onesies.  Just little things to help me feel like I'm getting somewhere.  


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Old 08-12-2011, 10:49 AM
 
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Yeah...though I stress and worry about a lot of things I shouldn't. I'm terrified (and excited) about being a parent, especially being raised in such a twisted way, I don't want to make the same mistakes! Plus money is super tight...I'm worried we won't have enough for essentials and stuff.


in love with and married to my best friend ♥ snuggling my baby girl Ari Grace, 12-4-11

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Old 08-12-2011, 10:59 AM
 
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I think it's "normal" stress... in that, I'm growing a human being inside of my body, and all my hormones and body parts are out of whack, and I GET to feel crazy, kind of way. 

 

I'm feeling remarkably calm so far, just stressed about not knowing the sex yet. I have a touch of OCD, and so the lack of knowledge, and not be able to plan accordingly (specifically, go through the 12 boxes of sorted boy/girl clothes I have, figure out if I need anything, pack away the rest, etc)... well it's driving me mad. But I don't feel worried about anything else. 

 

DH on the other hand, has been unemployed for the last 6 weeks (he quit a very horrible job, very good thing, but has been too busy working around the house to you know... apply for another one), and he is freaked out and stressed to the max. Some days I want to tell him to just go outside and come back when he's human again. 


Doula mama, medic daddy and Tenley Harper born naturally 11/29/11 delayedvax.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFcd.gif

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Old 08-15-2011, 01:42 AM
 
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It sounds normal, but with that said, now would be the time to rally the troops! Do you have family or close friends nearby that can help you with the housework? As far as the money situation and paying for everything, maybe you and your SO need to sit down and itemize your expenses, figure out a budget, start stashing away extra cash into savings for when the baby comes, and start living according to the new budget now, so you're accustomed to it by the time the baby arrives. As far as having time for everyone, go easy on yourself, Your first priority should be yourself, with your children and husband all close seconds. Think of it like this analogy: If you were on a plane, and there was suddenly low pressure and everyone needed to put on their oxygen masks to survive, how much of a help would you really be to others if you started in on helping other people put their masks on before your own? In order to have a clear mind and survive, you have to stop and put on your own oxygen mask first, then tend to others. Be kind to yourself, take of yourself first, and then attack the items/fears/tasks on your list one by one. Good luck. :)

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Old 08-15-2011, 09:17 AM
 
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Normal and totally expected pregnant mama response!  That little quiver of stress you are feeling is what often kick starts my nesting.  I get a little hyper -- where is the baby going to sleep?  Do I have diapers?  Do I have clothes?  Will I need to pump?  How are we going to manage?  Will there be enough money, time, food, etc, etc, etc?  

 

Completely normal!  

 

What helps me...lists!  I love to write it all down.  What do we really need?  Do I know anyone who can loan me things?  Are there things I can pick up at garage sales?  At resale shops?  When my mom calls and if I need anything for the baby, I like to be armed with a list.  Aunt V wants to buy something for the baby....sure, here is a website with our cloth diaper registry.  

 

This is also the time when I get incredibly frugal and start socking away a little extra cash.  5 or 10 dollars -- any little bit of money helps.  

 

I also started planing Christmas.  Our baby is due Dec 26 -- there is no way I can pull off a big Christmas this year.  So, I called my in-laws, told them my low key plan (no travel, minimal gifts, simple food) and they are completely on board.  If my MIL want to have an elaborate meal, she can do that herself.  I am planning on a very simple holiday. 

 

But really, I think the pregnancy stress is very normal.  I know that I have recently become extremely task-oriented.  All this kicking in my belly is a constant reminder that I have a deadline coming and need to be prepped.  I kind of like this phase of pregnancy.  I always get a ton of stuff done!  


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Old 08-15-2011, 04:29 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruthiegirl View Post

What helps me...lists!  I love to write it all down.  What do we really need?  Do I know anyone who can loan me things?  Are there things I can pick up at garage sales?  At resale shops?  When my mom calls and if I need anything for the baby, I like to be armed with a list.  Aunt V wants to buy something for the baby....sure, here is a website with our cloth diaper registry.  

 

I also started planing Christmas.  Our baby is due Dec 26 -- there is no way I can pull off a big Christmas this year.  So, I called my in-laws, told them my low key plan (no travel, minimal gifts, simple food) and they are completely on board.  If my MIL want to have an elaborate meal, she can do that herself.  I am planning on a very simple holiday. 


 

This is SO me. I'm driving DH crazy with all the planning and sorting and lists, but it makes me brain feel better. 


Doula mama, medic daddy and Tenley Harper born naturally 11/29/11 delayedvax.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFcd.gif

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Old 08-15-2011, 05:10 PM
 
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It's normal to be stressed, some stress is a good thing, it's when it gets in the way of functioning that it is problematic. 

 

My stress is largely related to baby/moving/Christmas- to make myself feel better (and because I can't really shop for Christmas stuff now and move it!) I'm set up a 'baby' envelope and a 'Christmas' envelope. That way, I know I can go out and get all the 'stuff' at once. 

 

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