Does your ob/midwife allow you to bring your children to appts? - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 14 Old 05-11-2011, 09:48 AM - Thread Starter
 
MadelinesMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Springfield, Mo
Posts: 221
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I just made my first ob appt and the receptionist informed me that they do not allow children at any of the appointments.  I am pretty shocked.  I don't have anyone close by that can watch my daughter.  So I guess this means my husband has to take off work every time I have an appt and he won't be able to go to the ultrasounds unless we can find someone to babysit.  I'm pretty frustrated right now.  Choosing another ob isn't really an option.  My insurance only covers two ob/gyn offices and there is no one at the other office I would consider using. 

 

Is this normal? 


Married to my other half

Mama to Madeline (07-10-07) and Finley (10-17-11)

MadelinesMama is offline  
#2 of 14 Old 05-11-2011, 10:15 AM
 
EngineeringMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 26
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Hugs mama! For OBs it does seem pretty normal. Midwives or OBs in birth centers seem to be more open to allowing children at visits.

 

Take a deep deep breath.  There may be options in your area your not aware of, you may be able to get your daughter into an hourly care arrangement at a local day care center. It's not optimal, but more reliable than a babysitter who may not be available when you need her to be.  Start now looking for babysitters and you just may find someone great, cheap or willing to barter with you.  Reach out to local play groups, search online, start trying to get some mama friends. SitterCitty is an online service for finding sitters although there are others that can help find someone.  Even your local Red Cross may have a list of teenagers who've been through their babysitting classes that could help. I've two and a third on the way, finding a few baby sitters will really help, juggling one is one thing, but having a couple of sitters on call can make being a mom of two far more manageable. 

 

Good luck, happy hunting.

 


EngineeringMama is an Active Duty military mom, wife to an Active Duty military dad, with two amazing little HypnoBabies (1&2) and a third bean-o on the way with a mid-January 2012 Guess Date.
EngineeringMama is offline  
#3 of 14 Old 05-11-2011, 01:36 PM
 
thorn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Alpharetta, GA
Posts: 2,420
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Yes, my OB office is very child friendly.  I choose not to bring my kids if I don't have to though, I tend to talk with him for a lonnnnng time and my kids would be really irritated and want to leave.


Christine, mom to C(7.5) - E(5) - J(3) - B(10 mos)

Doula, childbirth educator, Co-leader of ICAN of Atlanta

 

"Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it." ~Anonymous

thorn is offline  
#4 of 14 Old 05-11-2011, 07:47 PM
 
Eaglevoice's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Southern California
Posts: 3,425
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Bring them anyway...tell them you have no other option. I'm sure they will get over it.


Jenn, future midwife, mama to 2 sweet girls (6/05) and (5/07). 
Eaglevoice is offline  
#5 of 14 Old 05-12-2011, 03:45 AM
 
eli's mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: CT
Posts: 1,190
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by Eaglevoice View Post

Bring them anyway...tell them you have no other option. I'm sure they will get over it.



yeah that!

 

I'd be pretty peeved about that.  I see a hb midwife either at my house or hers and kids are always running around.  She has a lake house that she stays at all summer and she loves to have the kids come swim while we have appts.  Good luck mama!  You can find a better office!


Jessie. Mama to bikenew.gif(7) : broc1.gif(4) and : toddler.gif22 mo 

eli's mama is offline  
#6 of 14 Old 05-12-2011, 05:41 AM
 
Mommyofalmost6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Where ever the Navy says so
Posts: 277
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Actually there is a good chance they will make you leave and not have your appt. Been there done that sadly.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eaglevoice View Post

Bring them anyway...tell them you have no other option. I'm sure they will get over it.



 


Navy wife, mama of 3 girls, 3 boys, 2 kitties and wanting more. No vax, no circ, trying to live as natural as  we can. We are working on it
Mommyofalmost6 is offline  
#7 of 14 Old 05-12-2011, 07:50 AM
 
Sweet.Bee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Heidiland
Posts: 930
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mommyofalmost6 View Post

Actually there is a good chance they will make you leave and not have your appt. Been there done that sadly.


I have to agree. I saw an obgyn (before pregnancy) recently, and she not only sent me away when I bought my son, but she billed me for the "appointment" I didn't have. And this was after they never told me not to bring him. Of course, this was the world's worst doctor (for other reasons I won't get into), so maybe they are not all crazy. Still, I would not risk it.


Mama to our little boy (3) babyf.gif , the amazing super squirmer, almost born in the taxi...

and our new baby girl stork-girl.gif, caught by her daddy in our bathtub!

Sweet.Bee is offline  
#8 of 14 Old 05-12-2011, 09:05 AM
 
pixelmixel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 23
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I was always allowed to bring my son. Matter of fact, my seven year old son was present at our midwife-assisted hospital birth of his little brother five months ago!

pixelmixel is offline  
#9 of 14 Old 05-12-2011, 11:34 AM - Thread Starter
 
MadelinesMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Springfield, Mo
Posts: 221
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I went ahead and called the other office that my insurance covers and they also don't allow children.  I guess I'm out of luck.  :(


Married to my other half

Mama to Madeline (07-10-07) and Finley (10-17-11)

MadelinesMama is offline  
#10 of 14 Old 05-12-2011, 12:15 PM
 
eli's mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: CT
Posts: 1,190
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Oh, that really stinks! Maybe you can talk to the OB when you see him/her and explain that you have no childcare...I'm sure you won't be the first, maybe they could make an exception?? 


Jessie. Mama to bikenew.gif(7) : broc1.gif(4) and : toddler.gif22 mo 

eli's mama is offline  
#11 of 14 Old 05-15-2011, 08:37 AM
 
lactatinggirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Roy, Utah
Posts: 940
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

My home birth midwife not only allows my child, but doesn't mind at all when I have to stop talking in the middle of a sentence or things like that to deal with her. She said she has 18 grandkids and 1 great-grandkid, so she's used to it. If at all possible, I'd change. I can't imagine a doctor helping you have your baby not wanting to be around kids. Seems like something wrong there. 


Superherolactivist.gif and mother to Peanut (03/20/09) and Twig (01/20/2012). Fighting for the rights of mothers out there who winner.jpg selectivevax.gif fly-by-nursing2.giffemalesling.GIFfamilybed1.gifhomebirth.jpg and much more! mdcblog5.gif 
 
 
 
    

lactatinggirl is offline  
#12 of 14 Old 05-18-2011, 11:25 PM
 
cameragirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Sacramento, CA
Posts: 2,044
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Last time my OB only asked that I not bring children to the first appointment, or to appointments if we thought something was wrong. (miscarriage, etc.)  Otherwise, they didn't mind.  I didn't have any other kids at the time, though. 


Wife to DH, mama to bikenew.gif DD (7) ribboncesarean.gif, babyf.gif DS born 3/12 ribboncesarean.gif, and have had five early losses. angel1.gif
I have Stiff Person Syndrome and my other car is a candy apple red Rascal. Feel free to ask me about it. wheelchair.gif
cameragirl is offline  
#13 of 14 Old 05-18-2011, 11:56 PM
 
LiLStar's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: WA
Posts: 3,355
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 20 Post(s)

ddc crashing but.. wtf? thats beyond unreasonable. i've never in my entire life had any medical professional, mainstream or alternative, have anything against my kids being present. I'm.. dumbfounded. it would actually be more understandable in other specialties, since most don't need to go to the dr every month so if it was a once a year thing it wouldn't be a big deal, but demanding moms get childcare every 4 (2, 1) weeks is ridiculous. If I'm paying a babysitter, which I RARELY do, I damn well be going out to dinner with my dh, ya know?! 

lactatinggirl likes this.

dd (7) ds (5), ds (2) &3rdtri.gif hbac.gif and the furbabies cat.gifZeus, Dobby, Luna, & Ravenclaw
LiLStar is online now  
#14 of 14 Old 05-19-2011, 06:50 AM
 
BeanSprout Mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 625
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Yes, my CNM allows children at visits.  But really, I'm a homeschooling mother of 3.  Either my kids come, or I don't.  I would bring them anyway and explain that you don't have any other choice. It's an OB office. You'd think that providers working almost exclusively with women of childbearing age would expect to see some kids tagging along at appointments on a regular basis. It's unreasonable to expect you not to bring them.

lactatinggirl likes this.

wife to my  love.gif, mom toenergy.gif, blahblah.gif, jog.gif, and 3rdtri.gif ! a person is a person, no matter how small.

****5****10****15****20****25****30****35stork-girl.gif***40*

BeanSprout Mama is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off