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#1 of 39 Old 05-12-2011, 07:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi everybody!

 

I just found out on Mother's Day that I'm pregnant with my first. Since I didn't think we would get pregnant on our first try, I'm still trying to get a handle on all the do's and don't's of pregnancy. I wanted to start this thread so we could share our knowledge about what to do and what not to do for a healthy pregnancy.

 

I just found out yesterday that hot showers/baths are really bad, especially in the first trimester. Thank goodness I found out because I've been taking super hot showers to ease my lower back pain! Man am I going to miss those hot showers!

 

Also, I know unpasteurized cheese should be avoided, along with raw fish (bye-bye sushi!).

 

Please feel free to add any tips as they come to you.


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#2 of 39 Old 05-12-2011, 07:54 AM
 
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there's nothing wrong with hot showers.  hot baths should be avoided, but only so hot that you have to slowly lower yourself into them.  a regular warm bath is fine.  the concern is raising your core body temperature and because a shower allows for evaporation, it doesn't heat you up nearly as much.

 

do: take everything with a grain of salt

 

don't: read What To Fear Expect When You're Expecting

 

do: get information from a variety of sources (books, websites, your care provider, strangers on message boards :P) and make your own decisions

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#3 of 39 Old 05-12-2011, 08:11 AM
 
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A variety of sources is great advice, so is the advice to stay away from that dang book! Follow your instincts. Just because your porvider says something doesnt mean its gold and you have to do it. You do not have to do anything except have a baby ;) Just because everyone else is doing ABC doesnt mean you have to either. Try to keep a well balanced diet but if all you can hold down is posicles, cola, tea, what ever, go with it. Its not forever and you arent goign to hurt the baby.

 

Most of all congrats!!!!


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#4 of 39 Old 05-12-2011, 08:14 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by thorn View Post

there's nothing wrong with hot showers.  hot baths should be avoided, but only so hot that you have to slowly lower yourself into them.  a regular warm bath is fine.  the concern is raising your core body temperature and because a shower allows for evaporation, it doesn't heat you up nearly as much.

 

do: take everything with a grain of salt

 

don't: read What To Fear Expect When You're Expecting

 

do: get information from a variety of sources (books, websites, your care provider, strangers on message boards :P) and make your own decisions


The showers I take are long and BOILING hot, and I would be shocked if they didn't raise my core body temp...so I'm making my own decision to lay off on the boiling hot showers. ;) But thanks for the insight. Agreed, fear is definitely an enemy, and it's good to be informed by a variety of sources.

 


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#5 of 39 Old 05-12-2011, 06:13 PM
 
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a great book is the natural [regnancy book by aviva jill romm. I was a doula and having number two...i've read every pregnancy book and it is my fav, balanced, info on herbs and if you only read one book, it's the one! also wise woman herbal for the childbearing year by susun weed has some do's and don't both have a lot of herbal info...some exercise info in the first etc. i like her balanced view on testing and mitigating problems,,,the uva ursi recipe for uti's was awesome, no antibiotics des[ite 3 uti's!


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#6 of 39 Old 05-12-2011, 08:11 PM
 
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I agree, Do take EVERYTHING with a grain of salt.  Do educate yourself with a variety of sources, then use your brain and think about it.

 

Don't watch baby shows on TV, no matter how educational or how real life or how you think you'll be educating yourself, just don't do it.

 

 


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#7 of 39 Old 05-13-2011, 06:56 AM
 
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Originally Posted by EngineeringMama View Post

Don't watch baby shows on TV, no matter how educational or how real life or how you think you'll be educating yourself, just don't do it.

 

 

 

oh YES.  this is also a very important don't!!
 

 


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#8 of 39 Old 05-13-2011, 07:04 PM
 
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If you have a kitty, someone else gets to scoop for a while. :) I like this one!

 

Be cautious of taking ANY medication or drug.

 

Avoid artificial sweeteners (good to do anyways!)

 

Avoid fumes from chemicals, cleaning products (also good to do anyways!)

 

Keep your preformed vitamin A intake lower than 10,000 IU.

 

Eat nutrient dense, preferably organic whole foods and drink plenty of water.

 

I personally think the whole "eat loads of dairy" thing is a load of BS.

 

I agree with the previous comments about books/TV - NO to "what to expect" or TV baby shows, and a big YES to Aviva Jill Romm, Susun Weed, and Ina May Gaskin!


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#9 of 39 Old 05-14-2011, 07:46 AM
 
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Don't tell anyone your due date unless you want weeks of annoying phone calls and emails right before you are due. You will be anxious and annoyed enough at the end of your pregnancy, you don't need 25 calls a day from well wishers asking you how you are feeling and saying, "wow, I can't believe you are still pregnant." If you do feel inclined to give them a date, add 2 weeks to your actual EDD :)

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#10 of 39 Old 05-14-2011, 11:55 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eaglevoice View Post

Don't tell anyone your due date unless you want weeks of annoying phone calls and emails right before you are due. You will be anxious and annoyed enough at the end of your pregnancy, you don't need 25 calls a day from well wishers asking you how you are feeling and saying, "wow, I can't believe you are still pregnant." If you do feel inclined to give them a date, add 2 weeks to your actual EDD :)



This!! IT really stressed me out as i ended up goign 2 weeks over and I believe our c section was partly due to all the stress from insane relatives etc. phoning continually..hard to go into labour when youf eel like a watched pot!

 


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#11 of 39 Old 05-15-2011, 08:30 AM
 
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You should read The Pregnancy Book by Dr. Sears. He actually goes over the bath thing in there and it says basically that you'll get out before you get to 102 degrees, which is when it can harm the baby. He still says to limit time, but not entirely limit them. Also talks about other things. 

 

I think I avoided more than I needed to last pregnancy. I also think I got more testing done that I needed to last time. So this time I'm writing on my blog about my pregnancy and the more natural choices I'm making and why. If you'd like to check it out it's theadventuresoflactatinggirl.com


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#12 of 39 Old 05-15-2011, 10:50 PM
 
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Lessee...

 

DO make decisions based on what you feel is right.

 

I agree, DON'T read that "What to Expect" book, nor a ton of websites.  Remember: people want readers and higher ratings.  They can't hook you in if the answer to the question that you're looking up is  "nothing's wrong."  They want you to come back again and again, wondering when the sniffle you have is going to turn into full-blown cancer, like they've told you.

 

In that vein, DO think of most pregnancy info books/websites as your annoying, schizophrenic, hypochondriac aunt who you don't like to hang around with for longer than 5 minutes at any given time.

 

DO be proud of what your body is doing and try not to focus on the fact that you feel like an elephant.  (Someone please remind me of this when we're 9 months down the road and I'm posting my millionth complaint about feeling fat).  If you start to feel alone or frustrated with your weight gain, stretch marks, etc, then DO DO DO visit The Shape of a Mother religiously.

 

DON'T buy everything you see scrolling down the side of your computer screen.  Seriously, you won't need it....You won't listen to anyone and you'll buy it anyway, but you won't need it. 

 

DO graciously accept hand-me-downs.  You're saving the sanity of some poor sap who did the above-mentioned.  And you get to spend more money on things like diapers...and massages.

 

DON'T expect a day to go by, where someone isn't going to give you advice about something.  Listen to those you trust.  Punch the others in the nose.  Seriously.  (me included.  Here's my nose...)

 

DO expect at least one fight with your SO, three with your mother, and 19,875,674 with inanimate objects.


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#13 of 39 Old 05-16-2011, 06:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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These are all great suggestions ladies...thank you!


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#14 of 39 Old 05-16-2011, 11:50 AM
 
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I always took hot showers, I couldn't live without them lol. Really hot baths area no-no and jacuzzis. I couldn't be in a hot shower to long at the end though, I always felt like I was going to pass out, I'd have to stick my head out and breath cold air for a minute. Lube up that belly after you shower even though there's no guarantee it will do anything for stretch marks. Do not stress out if you get them, it's normal.

Research anything big you plan on buying. Check different website for reviews so you don't waste your money with junk.

Don't watch those baby shows, don't read horror baby stories or research too much online. They will only make you nervous.

Do your own research on things like circumcision, breastfeeding, vaccinations, cloth diapers, epidurals/natural birth.... Don't just do what everyone else is doing or what your mother or sister did.

Eat as healthy as you can.

Be active, no marathons but don't get too lazy.

Stay home as long as you can before going to the hospital if that's where you plan to deliver. Sitting in waiting rooms and triages sucks when you're having contractions. You might have a false alarm the first time you go anyways lol. Most likely the baby will not just slide out of you in the car (well with your 1st anyways) so stay at home comfortable as long as you can stand.

Do not climb up on things.

They say to stop wearing heels once you get big.

Do leave your midwife or doctor if you are not comfortable with them, find someone you trust and like.

Don't drink too much caffeine. Try to limit it to a cup of coffee a day. If you love soda and can't give it up like I used to, switch to caffeine free and even limit that.

If you are using disposables buy a pack here and there of the bigger sizes like 3 and up. Everyone buys the tiny sizes for you.

 

 

 

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#15 of 39 Old 05-16-2011, 02:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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mrspnut82, those are really great tips. Thanks!!!


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#16 of 39 Old 05-17-2011, 03:41 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by demoonunit View Post

Hi everybody!

 

I just found out on Mother's Day that I'm pregnant with my first. Since I didn't think we would get pregnant on our first try, I'm still trying to get a handle on all the do's and don't's of pregnancy. I wanted to start this thread so we could share our knowledge about what to do and what not to do for a healthy pregnancy.

 

I just found out yesterday that hot showers/baths are really bad, especially in the first trimester. Thank goodness I found out because I've been taking super hot showers to ease my lower back pain! Man am I going to miss those hot showers!

 

Also, I know unpasteurized cheese should be avoided, along with raw fish (bye-bye sushi!).

 

Please feel free to add any tips as they come to you.

 

Oh oh, I will research tomorrow but why? I drink a lot of raw milk and I was just going to order some cheese. Eeek.



 

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#17 of 39 Old 05-17-2011, 05:45 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Pasteurized cheese is fine, but you want to avoid unpasteurized cheeses. They say that anything made with raw milk is risky.

 

http://www.babycenter.com/404_is-it-safe-to-eat-soft-cheese-during-pregnancy_3175.bc


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#18 of 39 Old 05-17-2011, 01:36 PM
 
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Thanks for all of the tips, everyone. This first-time mamma to be is grateful. namaste.gif


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#19 of 39 Old 05-17-2011, 08:00 PM
 
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Congrats!!

 

If you haven't, make sure to watch the Business of being Born.  Also, Orgasmic birth(don't be scared by the title!) is another good one that changes your ideas about birth some if you have ever watched any TLC shows!

 

Make sure you research breastfeeding before delivery.  You will be a lot better off if there are issues if you have an idea of where to find support and info beforehand.

 

Do attend a natural childbirth class, but make sure it is not offered by a hospital!  The hospital class is pretty much a "turn you into a yes patient class" and not a "preparation for birthing class"

 

Do read Ina May, Henci Goer, and ignore anything that makes birth seem scary!

 

Good luck!!  Starting out already knowing about how to find info on this site gives you a great leg up when it comes to parenting!

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#20 of 39 Old 05-18-2011, 12:18 AM
 
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DO read about and research c-section, as even the best plans can sometimes go awry.  Having a plan and knowing the things you want before the surgery if it is needed will help.

 

DO get a second opinion if any doctor says you need a procedure you don't feel comfortable with, including surgical birth.

 

Um, that is about all I can think of that hasn't been mentioned.

 

I will reiterate though that all you need for baby is; a place for baby to sleep, something to keep baby warm, a safe way for baby to ride in a car, something to catch babies poop and a way to feed baby.  Everything else is a nicety.  If you don't have a bouncer or a swing when the baby is born, it is NOT the end of the world.


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#21 of 39 Old 05-18-2011, 07:18 AM
 
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 If people offer to tell you the scary birth story of their own, their wife, cousin, sister, etc. don't feel afraid to politely decline. Just say, I'm focusing on the positive but I appreciate you wanting to share.

 

Exercise, even if it's just walking every day. Good for you and baby. My co-worker is 38 weeks and she is still riding her bike to work every day!

 

Use Midwives. There is no comparison to OB's, they are so much more relaxing and gentle to be around.

 

Have a good postpartum plan ready. Friends to bring over food, family that wants to come to HELP (not oggle the baby) and cook and freeze some food. If your DH is not a great cook or not so great at cleaning, teach him now. For the first 3 weeks after the baby all you should be doing is nursing, sleeping and eating. No housework, it's your babymoon.

 

Take photos and/or journal the next 8 months. It goes by SO fast (truly, my kids are much older, I wish I had a better record of both my pregnancies with them)

 

 


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#22 of 39 Old 05-18-2011, 11:18 PM
 
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Everything said is so true.  You don't need most of the baby supplies in stores.  Diapers, some onesies and sleepers, a few baby blankets, and somewhere for them to sleep is enough to get started.

 

Take a good childbirth and breastfeeding class if you can. 

 

Trust yourself!  Only YOU know what type of birth is right for you.  You know what is best for your baby, too. 

 

Avoid the baby shows - the majority of deliveries are uncomplicated and are nothing like the high risk deliveries on the shows.  Drama gets ratings.  Aside from the drama, they can turn you into a weepy mess.

 

If you're nursing, try to avoid keeping formula samples in the house, especially the first few weeks.  It can be tempting to have Dad give the baby a bottle when you haven't slept in days.  Remember that it is a learning process for both mom and baby when it comes to breastfeeding.  Give yourself time for that.

 

If you can see a midwife, I highly recommend it.  Many practices have a certified nurse midwife on staff now.  I felt that the midwife took much more time to take care of me, explain what was going on, and reassure me than the doctors ever did.  Their appointment times are often 30-60 minutes instead of 10 minutes with an OB. 

 

Do your best to eat well and get exercise.  If you feel like crud, get down what you can for now. 

 

 

 


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#23 of 39 Old 05-19-2011, 07:02 AM
 
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(from the perspective of a mother of 3)

rest. Eat what you won't have to see again.

Take more belly pictures than you think you'll ever want.

Do a belly cast (but buy supplies early because if you do what I did and plan to wait until 39 weeks to do the belly cast, you'll do what I did and go into labor at 38 weeks and never do the belly cast).

Go to a birthing class and make your husband/partner come with you. He won't necessary automatically know how to support you, so give him the tools he needs so he can learn how.

Bring two going home outfits to the hospital for your baby. If you only bring one your baby will poop on it.

RELAX and enjoy your pregnancy. Believe it or not, you'll miss this when it's over.

 

(from the perspective of a L&D nurse)

Drink more water than you think you handle.

(If you are having a hospital birth) See a midwife, not an OB. OBs are surgeons and they assume all pregnant women are high-risk until proven low-risk and treat you accordingly. Midwives assume all pregnant women are low-risk until proven high-risk and treat you accordingly. It matters.

If you write a birth plan keep it short, flexible, and polite. Nobody will read it or attempt to follow it if it's 4 pages long, iron-clad, and rude/condescending. That saying about catching more flies with honey really does apply to the hospital.

Do not be afraid to say NO, or ask for a second opinion, or ask for more time to make decisions you're faced with during pregnancy and birth. There are no do-overs so make sure you stand up for yourself and what you need.


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#24 of 39 Old 05-19-2011, 06:13 PM
 
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So true!  Spaghetti is a bad idea if you're going to be bent over the toilet later.  :)

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(from the perspective of a mother of 3)

rest. Eat what you won't have to see again.


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#25 of 39 Old 06-13-2011, 04:37 PM
 
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Remember that babies are MUCH easier to take care of inside than outside. The end of pregnancy sucks, but it's worth it to give your little one every single day you can.

 

Make sure you educate your dh/partner get them on board with your decision and tell him that if zie sides with the dr/ob/nurse/random person over you zie is in DEEP TROUBLE! :) (seriously, hearing too many stories about scared dh's being manipulated by medpros into acting against their partners & even holding the woman down during procedures she refused) Get them The Birth Partner and make sure it gets read.

 

Read "The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth"

 

Research everything. There are very few situations where you won't have time to do some research about whatever it is your care provider thinks you should do. This goes especially for "low fluid", "overdue" & "big baby"

 

There's very little a newborn needs, loving arms, diapers (& even those are optional for some people :) ), food,  & clothes. It's much easier to go out and buy what you decide you need after the little one is here than to try to return a bunch of overpriced stuff you discovered you didn't need. The one caveat to this is a good baby carrier; a woven wrap or a MT are great for newborns and can still be used when the baby gets bigger, unlike a stretchy wrap. Especially if you have a high needs baby and once you can wear them on your back, you will wonder how the heck anyone manages without one.

 

If you're having trouble nursing, get help A.S.A.P. One way that seems to help avoid major latch issues is to allow the baby to self attach after birth. If the baby has a tongue or lip tie that is interfering, get it clipped, even if you have to contact a lot of different people to find one willing to do it.

 

Watch UC videos on youtube. When you know what normal birth looks and sounds like, it's easier to know when something isn't normal. Get your partner to watch too. It will probably help them be more relaxed. If you would like the link to my UC video from ds3 (although we just caught a bit of transition and the actual birth) please pm me.

 

Have fun! There are some sucky parts about pregnancy, but there's lots of fun and exciting stuff too.


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#26 of 39 Old 06-13-2011, 08:05 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Devaskyla View Post

 

If you're having trouble nursing, get help A.S.A.P. One way that seems to help avoid major latch issues is to allow the baby to self attach after birth.

 

 



I will second, third and fourth this!!!  Even if you think you'll be able to handle it, the slightest amount of stress can affect your breastfeeding, not to mention your sanity.  I would add that if you're having a hospital birth, be weary of hospital-selected "lactation consultants".  Don't get me wrong, some are great and have the mother's best interests in mind.  Unfortunately, some will side more with doctors or are stretched so thin between all the mothers they have to see that they don't spend the time needed with each mother.  For me, the hospital's LC hurridly checked out my chest, told me I'd most likely not produce milk, due to the distance between my breasts, showed me how to latch ONCE and then shoved a formula sample pack into my arms.  Hire an LC that you trust and interview them before you have the kid.  Assume you're going to have issues and be proactive.  Breastfeeding is HARD!  One of the the best things you can experience, but HARD!

 


Wife to Phil, Mom to Saoirse (3/09), and Niamh (1/12)  waterbirth.jpg.crochetsmilie.gif
 

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#27 of 39 Old 06-13-2011, 09:02 PM
 
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DDC crashing - I eat lots of sushi, and I'm pregnant. Rules are for generalities - we're all individuals, with different risk tolerances.

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#28 of 39 Old 06-14-2011, 08:42 PM
 
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also ddc crashing but i could be a january as late december : ) babies like to stay warm ha

 

i loved what bean sprout said about eat what you dont have to see again.  that is def my eating philosophy at 13 weeks cereal is my best friend


 heartbeat.gifMomma to baby boy Ember.babyf.gifborn at home 12/22/11.  Madly loving his daddy Thimble guitar.gif since 6/26/09. 

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#29 of 39 Old 06-14-2011, 09:04 PM
 
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Do's : Drink fruit juice such as pomegranate,cranberry and pear

 

Don't : Eat processed food

 

Do's : Go outside, breathe fresh air, relax and do mild exercise such as walking or stretching

 

Don't : Sleep the whole day or just sitiing the whole day, you will feel weak

 

 

 

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#30 of 39 Old 06-15-2011, 06:59 AM
 
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My theory is that if you're good to your body it will be good to you...so sushi is fine whereas cocaine is not.  Caffeine won't kill you, but 100 ounces a day isn't helping!

 

Another thing that I'd really suggest as it worked well for me is to involve your partner in the birthing plans.  I was soooo caught up in having the birth I wanted that allowing my partner in was a second thought.  Luckily we took a crunchy childbirth class and he realized what I wanted v. what I needed.  When you're in the late stages of labor and actually delivering your physical and emotional senses are in another place.  You will want an advocate - why not have it be your partner?  Besides, it's pretty common when going through transition to have a "WTF was I thinking?!?" moment and that person, if prepared, can help empower you to pull through it.


Angela
Chatty Girl - 3/2006, Lovey Boy - 1/2010, Delicious Baby Girl - 1/2012
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