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Old 11-09-2011, 08:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Are there any mamas on here planning on tandeming? How's the nursing going thus far?

 

I'm looking for advice/ ways to introduce dd to the idea that another baby going to be nursing at her "num-nums". 


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Old 11-10-2011, 12:24 PM
 
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Not any advice here, but it looks like we are headed in that direction. A few months ago DS was down to 1-2 sessions/24 hours, so I thought he was going to self wean (I didn't have much milk anyways). Now, he's picked up about 7+ sessions.. and my nipples aren't too happy! I keep telling myself it's his way of getting me ready for those newborn days again :) I do hear him swallowing more, so I know my supply has increased a little bit. I'm not sure what is causing the increase in nursing (I know he's cutting his bottom 2 yr molars), and he will be 2 this weekend (so maybe it's a I really want to be independent, but not so much- thing!). I have talked a little about sharing "mama milk" and I bought the book (haven't given it to him yet) Mommy Breastfeeds My Baby Brother to read with him. I also (much to DH's dismay) bought a baby doll to "practice" playing baby brother with him- I will probably start that next month- mainly just to get him used to the idea of me holding, changing diapers, etc on somebody else. He's pretty verbal, and today while he was nursing he popped off and said "share"... I thought he said "chair", and I asked if he wanted to move to the chair (we were on the floor). He repeated it.. I still thought he was saying chair. Finally, he said "baby brother- share"! Earlier he had said he didn't want to share "mama milk", and I explained that I had 2 sides, so he could pick one and his brother could have the other side. I almost cried when I figured out he was saying he would share! Then he brought his bear to drink "mama milk" (and that's the first time he's ever done that).

 

Sorry that was a long story! How old is your DD, Mommy2anangel?


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Old 11-10-2011, 12:42 PM
 
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I so wanted to tandem, but my son weaned around 16 months when my milk dried up.  He just decided it wasn't worth the work to get no reward.

 

I'm insanely jealous of you ladies that get to do this!


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Old 11-10-2011, 03:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by bentlaj11 View Post

Not any advice here, but it looks like we are headed in that direction. A few months ago DS was down to 1-2 sessions/24 hours, so I thought he was going to self wean (I didn't have much milk anyways). Now, he's picked up about 7+ sessions.. and my nipples aren't too happy! I keep telling myself it's his way of getting me ready for those newborn days again :) I do hear him swallowing more, so I know my supply has increased a little bit. I'm not sure what is causing the increase in nursing (I know he's cutting his bottom 2 yr molars), and he will be 2 this weekend (so maybe it's a I really want to be independent, but not so much- thing!). I have talked a little about sharing "mama milk" and I bought the book (haven't given it to him yet) Mommy Breastfeeds My Baby Brother to read with him. I also (much to DH's dismay) bought a baby doll to "practice" playing baby brother with him- I will probably start that next month- mainly just to get him used to the idea of me holding, changing diapers, etc on somebody else. He's pretty verbal, and today while he was nursing he popped off and said "share"... I thought he said "chair", and I asked if he wanted to move to the chair (we were on the floor). He repeated it.. I still thought he was saying chair. Finally, he said "baby brother- share"! Earlier he had said he didn't want to share "mama milk", and I explained that I had 2 sides, so he could pick one and his brother could have the other side. I almost cried when I figured out he was saying he would share! Then he brought his bear to drink "mama milk" (and that's the first time he's ever done that).

 

Sorry that was a long story! How old is your DD, Mommy2anangel?



That is so sweet!! Not too long :)

 

She will be 3 on December 10th, and I'm due right around a month after. We don't seem to have an end in sight as of yet, which I am fine with, and thankfully I haven't had any soreness or issues, just a drop in supply, up until about 25 weeks when my colostrum came in. She hasn't fully night weaned, I've been working on that for a very.long.time.. lol. But I am hoping this month is the lucky month, or at least by her birthday. *Sigh.. lol. 

 

I think it'll be okay, with introducing a new baby, I think I just need to broach the subject with her. She's very excited about having a baby. I don't know why I am having anxiety about it. redface.gif Maybe it's the thought of nursing 2 kids? 


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Old 11-10-2011, 03:37 PM
 
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i've tandemed before, but i don't think i'll get to this time, unless DS3 takes it up again (it wouldn't surprise me, he does occasionally ask for it).

 

one bit of advice- don't plan on being able to nurse them together all the time.  especially at the beginning, trying to establish nursing, i found it was hard enough just to get the baby positioned right on the breast, nevermind the toddler who wants to do acrobatics.  while we certainly did our share of simultaneous nursing, i found that i usually ended up nursing them one at a time, which was easier in some senses, and frustrating in others (oh, i spent SO MUCH TIME NURSING!).

 

also, the book "adventures in tandem nursing" is an excellent resource of information and anecdotes from other tandem nursing mamas.

 

best part about tandem nursing (you know, aside from the warm fuzzies you get)-- the help with extra supply at first.  oh, having a toddler there to gulp away is such a huge help with engorgement!


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Old 11-10-2011, 05:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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i've tandemed before, but i don't think i'll get to this time, unless DS3 takes it up again (it wouldn't surprise me, he does occasionally ask for it).

 

one bit of advice- don't plan on being able to nurse them together all the time.  especially at the beginning, trying to establish nursing, i found it was hard enough just to get the baby positioned right on the breast, nevermind the toddler who wants to do acrobatics.  while we certainly did our share of simultaneous nursing, i found that i usually ended up nursing them one at a time, which was easier in some senses, and frustrating in others (oh, i spent SO MUCH TIME NURSING!).

 

also, the book "adventures in tandem nursing" is an excellent resource of information and anecdotes from other tandem nursing mamas.

 

best part about tandem nursing (you know, aside from the warm fuzzies you get)-- the help with extra supply at first.  oh, having a toddler there to gulp away is such a huge help with engorgement!



I'm looking forward to that, and her reaction to having actual milk back... lol. I was so engorged with her. Sheesh. 


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Old 11-11-2011, 04:05 PM
 
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Originally Posted by bentlaj11 View Post

Not any advice here, but it looks like we are headed in that direction. A few months ago DS was down to 1-2 sessions/24 hours, so I thought he was going to self wean (I didn't have much milk anyways). Now, he's picked up about 7+ sessions.. and my nipples aren't too happy! I keep telling myself it's his way of getting me ready for those newborn days again :) I do hear him swallowing more, so I know my supply has increased a little bit. I'm not sure what is causing the increase in nursing (I know he's cutting his bottom 2 yr molars), and he will be 2 this weekend (so maybe it's a I really want to be independent, but not so much- thing!). I have talked a little about sharing "mama milk" and I bought the book (haven't given it to him yet) Mommy Breastfeeds My Baby Brother to read with him. I also (much to DH's dismay) bought a baby doll to "practice" playing baby brother with him- I will probably start that next month- mainly just to get him used to the idea of me holding, changing diapers, etc on somebody else. He's pretty verbal, and today while he was nursing he popped off and said "share"... I thought he said "chair", and I asked if he wanted to move to the chair (we were on the floor). He repeated it.. I still thought he was saying chair. Finally, he said "baby brother- share"! Earlier he had said he didn't want to share "mama milk", and I explained that I had 2 sides, so he could pick one and his brother could have the other side. I almost cried when I figured out he was saying he would share! Then he brought his bear to drink "mama milk" (and that's the first time he's ever done that).

 

Sorry that was a long story! How old is your DD, Mommy2anangel?

 

Guessing your DS is nursing more because your colostrum came in. I'm thinking that's why my DD is nursing more.

 

AFM, I'll definitely be tandem nursing. DD is asking for it a lot more often than she used to. We got to one point in the pregnancy (when my milk was gone) that she was going once every few days, but the second my colostrum came in she was all for it. Now she's wanting to co-sleep again and she's asking to nurse to sleep, nap, morning, and often between those times. Honestly, I love that I get some extra time in bed and it's not a fight to get her to sleep. I just don't have the energy these days!

 

I'm certainly more sore, but it's tolerable. When I get letdown it feels like someone has suddenly pinched my nipple really hard, which is weird. DD will be 3 in March and she understands that she can't do acrobatics while she's nursing because it hurts mama. I've also figured out that I'm much less resistant to nursing when we nurse laying down.

 

I need to get Adventures in Tandem Nursing again. I read the beginning when I was first pregnant, but the person I borrowed it from needed it back.
 

 


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Old 11-12-2011, 12:29 AM
 
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It's looking like I'm going to be tandeming too. I really don't want to, I don't even want to be nursing right now. I'm trying to limit ds3, but he freaks out & lifts my shirt which is really making me want to lash out at him. I'm not, but I sure want to. Except for when he has a quick bit to go to sleep, nursing is just making my skin crawl these days. Most of the time it doesn't hurt anymore, although it has done for most of the pregnancy.

 

I never had the slightest interest in doing tandem nursing, I weaned ds2 while I was pregnant, but he was 3 1/2 & ds3 is only 2 1/2. I was really hoping he was going to wean, he was down to once or twice a day when I got pregnant and it seems like the second I got pregnant, he started trying to nurse constantly and he hasn't stopped since. I'm just not up for the huge fight of trying to wean him right now, especially after we just finished potty training (day anyway)


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Old 11-14-2011, 06:52 AM
 
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It's looking like I'm going to be tandeming too. I really don't want to, I don't even want to be nursing right now. I'm trying to limit ds3, but he freaks out & lifts my shirt which is really making me want to lash out at him. I'm not, but I sure want to. Except for when he has a quick bit to go to sleep, nursing is just making my skin crawl these days. Most of the time it doesn't hurt anymore, although it has done for most of the pregnancy.

 

I never had the slightest interest in doing tandem nursing, I weaned ds2 while I was pregnant, but he was 3 1/2 & ds3 is only 2 1/2. I was really hoping he was going to wean, he was down to once or twice a day when I got pregnant and it seems like the second I got pregnant, he started trying to nurse constantly and he hasn't stopped since. I'm just not up for the huge fight of trying to wean him right now, especially after we just finished potty training (day anyway)


I totally get what you mean by the skin crawling and I hate it when DD starts grabbing at me freaking out when I try to tell her no. Someone in LLL suggested that I take her up to the bed every time we nurse. This not only makes her not want to nurse as often (having to stop her playing to go upstairs and lay there), but it also feels a bit more comfortable for me.

 


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Old 11-14-2011, 12:10 PM
 
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Sorry I haven't been able to reply... DS turned 2 yesterday, so we were in party mode around here :)

 

HCM- Thanks for the tips! Part of me is really glad to have a cold weather baby again.. I love being snuggled up inside with a nursing baby. It will definitely take some practice to try tandem nursing. DS has been really adament about getting "mama milk", so I'm wondering how it will go when he really does have to share!

 

Lactatinggirl- I bet you are right about the increased nursing from the colostrum. I do hear more swallowing now. It was just a shock that he went from so few times to so many!

 

The soreness for me is tolerable, too. It does however get to be irritating.. in a make my skin crawl kind of way... sometimes. I guess when he's not drinking his latch gets lazy, and it feels so,so weird. I've even limited his sessions (give him a 1 or 2 min. warning and then count down the last 10 sec), and sometimes that works, and he unlatches and doesn't ask for more. Most of the time, though he just asks for the other side. I hate that I feel like I have to limit him sometimes, but I think I would go crazy if I didn't. Devaskyla, thanks for your story! It's good to know that I'm that the only one who's struggling!


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Old 11-14-2011, 05:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sorry I haven't been able to reply... DS turned 2 yesterday, so we were in party mode around here :)

 

HCM- Thanks for the tips! Part of me is really glad to have a cold weather baby again.. I love being snuggled up inside with a nursing baby. It will definitely take some practice to try tandem nursing. DS has been really adament about getting "mama milk", so I'm wondering how it will go when he really does have to share!

 

Lactatinggirl- I bet you are right about the increased nursing from the colostrum. I do hear more swallowing now. It was just a shock that he went from so few times to so many!

 

The soreness for me is tolerable, too. It does however get to be irritating.. in a make my skin crawl kind of way... sometimes. I guess when he's not drinking his latch gets lazy, and it feels so,so weird. I've even limited his sessions (give him a 1 or 2 min. warning and then count down the last 10 sec), and sometimes that works, and he unlatches and doesn't ask for more. Most of the time, though he just asks for the other side. I hate that I feel like I have to limit him sometimes, but I think I would go crazy if I didn't. Devaskyla, thanks for your story! It's good to know that I'm that the only one who's struggling!



I definitely do a count down with DD, especially at night, and she usually unlatches and goes back to bed, sometimes I have to count to 5 a couple of times, but she unlatches which I'm happy about. We really do need to night wean completely. I don't want to have to be nursing 2 at night. Ah.

 

I also make her ask for it if she wants it. I can't stand the shirt pulling. When she started doing it during this pregnancy, I'd hold onto my shirt and hold her at arms length and ask her what she wants, and it worked after a few tries, now she doesn't pull on my shirt. What she does now, is say "Mama, I'm tired, I want some num nums" lol. 


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Old 11-14-2011, 10:06 PM
 
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bentlaj, You just reminded me of something I've been avoiding thinking about. WIth my other winter baby, I had horribly painful nipples due to Raynaud's. (think that's what it's called). I don't have trouble with nursing toddlers or summer babies, just with ds3 as a newborn in March. Really hoping that doesn't happen again. Maybe still nursing ds3 will help with it.


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Old 11-15-2011, 11:24 AM
 
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bentlaj, You just reminded me of something I've been avoiding thinking about. WIth my other winter baby, I had horribly painful nipples due to Raynaud's. (think that's what it's called). I don't have trouble with nursing toddlers or summer babies, just with ds3 as a newborn in March. Really hoping that doesn't happen again. Maybe still nursing ds3 will help with it.



I was thinking about it after I had already posted (because I had gone outside w/ DS).. how horrible my nipples feel when I get cold (goosebumps)! They seize up like they are on fire (and I don't have Raynaud's, so I can't imagine how bad yours must feel :( !


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Old 11-19-2011, 08:54 AM
 
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I wish DD would work with things like counting. When I try to unlatch her, warning or not, she flips out. Especially right before bed. Ugh.


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Old 11-20-2011, 05:32 PM
 
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I usually have to give a 2 minute warning and then count down from 10. I try not to do it during the day (for whatever reason his nursing doesn't hurt/irritate me as much when we are in the rocking chair as it does laying down at night). It's the nighttime nursing that's really driving me crazy (and subsequently my husband). I usually have to give him 2 minutes/count down 3 or 4 times before he will unlatch and go back to sleep. He went from 1-2x at night to waking up 4-5x. I tried to give it the old "this too shall pass" but in my cranky pregnant state it's not going too well. Especially when he wakes up at 4 or 5 am and wants to nurse for an hour before he goes back to sleep. After a few nights of that I really tried to get him to unlatch, and that's when he wasn't having it at all! DH's solution is to "just wean" him... but DS really isn't ready, and part of me isn't (although I don't know how many more nights I can take). I just wish I knew what was causing the sudden night wakings/nursing marathon. Did anyone go through a big change right around 2 yrs? Did it last for long? I hope it's not him being clingy (for lack of a better term) because of my growing belly. I'm scared to nurse 2 at night, too!


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Old 11-23-2011, 09:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I usually have to give a 2 minute warning and then count down from 10. I try not to do it during the day (for whatever reason his nursing doesn't hurt/irritate me as much when we are in the rocking chair as it does laying down at night). It's the nighttime nursing that's really driving me crazy (and subsequently my husband). I usually have to give him 2 minutes/count down 3 or 4 times before he will unlatch and go back to sleep. He went from 1-2x at night to waking up 4-5x. I tried to give it the old "this too shall pass" but in my cranky pregnant state it's not going too well. Especially when he wakes up at 4 or 5 am and wants to nurse for an hour before he goes back to sleep. After a few nights of that I really tried to get him to unlatch, and that's when he wasn't having it at all! DH's solution is to "just wean" him... but DS really isn't ready, and part of me isn't (although I don't know how many more nights I can take). I just wish I knew what was causing the sudden night wakings/nursing marathon. Did anyone go through a big change right around 2 yrs? Did it last for long? I hope it's not him being clingy (for lack of a better term) because of my growing belly. I'm scared to nurse 2 at night, too!


Hugs! Is he getting any teeth in, molars maybe? That could be a possibility, or he's getting colostrum and doesn't want to give it up?

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Old 11-23-2011, 03:55 PM
 
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I usually have to give a 2 minute warning and then count down from 10. I try not to do it during the day (for whatever reason his nursing doesn't hurt/irritate me as much when we are in the rocking chair as it does laying down at night). It's the nighttime nursing that's really driving me crazy (and subsequently my husband). I usually have to give him 2 minutes/count down 3 or 4 times before he will unlatch and go back to sleep. He went from 1-2x at night to waking up 4-5x. I tried to give it the old "this too shall pass" but in my cranky pregnant state it's not going too well. Especially when he wakes up at 4 or 5 am and wants to nurse for an hour before he goes back to sleep. After a few nights of that I really tried to get him to unlatch, and that's when he wasn't having it at all! DH's solution is to "just wean" him... but DS really isn't ready, and part of me isn't (although I don't know how many more nights I can take). I just wish I knew what was causing the sudden night wakings/nursing marathon. Did anyone go through a big change right around 2 yrs? Did it last for long? I hope it's not him being clingy (for lack of a better term) because of my growing belly. I'm scared to nurse 2 at night, too!


Personally, my DD who is 33 months is getting more clingy because of the belly growing. She's been night weaned for some time, but she still wants to nurse back to sleep for the last hour or so of sleep time (partially because I'm trying to get her back to sleep). From what I've heard from other tandeming mamas, daddy basically takes over for the toddler's needs at night when the baby is born. I'm hoping the transition will work well, but honestly, I'm trying to not even worry about it until the time comes.


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Old 11-29-2011, 11:39 AM
 
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I forget about the teeth, but yes, that is part of it. I guess it's a combination of things (nothing is ever simple, huh?). I actually got a nice break over Thanksgiving.. he was too distracted playing on Nanna and Grandpappy's farm (and with Nanna and Grandpappy) to do much nursing during the day. He also slept until 4 am without nursing the first night we were there! Nothing like good country fresh air and exercise to help with sleep. It just reminds me about how lazy I've been lately with getting enough exercise for both of us :(  Now we are back into our routine, and it's back to nursing like crazy, but the break really helped with the agitation and frustration!! Now I know I just need to leave the house and get more exercise.

 

If you co-sleep, do your DC sleep in b/t you and your S/O? I've been wondering if DS sleeping b/t a bedrail and DH would make a difference.

 

Hope everyone is doing good. I really need to read Adventures in Tandem Nursing, but I couldn't find it at the library :( It's hard to believe how close it's getting to meet our new LOs, and start newborn nursing again! I'm already sleepy just thinking about it..haha!


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Old 11-29-2011, 05:19 PM
 
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Right now DD sleeps next to me (and often tries to sleep ON TOP of me) and when DH comes to bed he gets on the other side of her. I've heard about a lot of moms who co-sleep after the baby is born doing this kind of sleep arrangement: older child - partner - younger child - mama. The partner takes over most of the nighttime parenting for the older child in that situation, which would obviously mean that you're not nursing as much at night. I doubt that DD would accept daddy at night when mama is available, but maybe once the baby comes and mama isn't as available, she'll be more okay with daddy cuddles.


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Old 12-17-2011, 11:40 AM
 
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Hey, Devaskyla- I've been thinking about you and wondering if nursing your DS was going any better for you? We've had some rough nights... it seems like that's when I have the hardest time tolerating nursing- but things have been better recently. He's really responding well to 1 minute sessions (sometimes just one side, sometimes both) at nights, and I've been putting no limits on the daytime nursing to help "make up" for it. I hope it remains as "easy" for the next few weeks. Did you say you had night-weaned already? I hope it's going better for you (or maybe he's at least let up some). I'm hoping against hope that DS won't cut his top molars until well after the new little guy gets here because I think that was part of the rough nights last month.

 

I finally got around to buying "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" and already love it, even though I've only read a few pages. It started out talking about the struggles of weaning vs not during pg., and it makes me feel less "alone"! I, also found it interesting that some cultures will abstain from sex while BF until their child is well into toddlerhood. That would help with not having to struggle with being pg and BF, but I don't think DH would go for 3+ yrs of nothing... haha!


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Old 12-17-2011, 04:36 PM
 
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Thanks for thinking of us. If he's nursing strongly, it's ok, but when he's just nursing slightly, it drives me crazy still. I think it's a difference in the way his tongue moves. I've been nursing him as long as I can manage to get him to sleep, then cuddling him when I can't take it anymore. Seems to wok well most nights. Most days he's not nursing at all during the day, so that makes me life easier. When he does, I usually limit him to a couple minutes on each side. And then he cuddles for a few minutes. At least he's usually not upset anymore about being limited. He hasn't really nursed during the night in a long time, unless he's having a really bad time.

 

Sending you "no molars" vibes for the next few weeks.

 

Somehow I think my dh would be less than impressed with 3+ years of nothing, too. lol


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Old 12-18-2011, 12:45 PM
 
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Glad to hear things are going better and he's doing well with the cuddling, too. I sometimes wonder if DS will ever just want to cuddle! I agree with you about the way they nurse making a difference. It's when DS is sleepy that he nurses funny.. it almost tickles, but it's what agitates me the most. Even if I try to relatch him, it makes no difference. I'm hoping that it's a sensitivity issue that will go away once DS2 gets here. Sometimes I think painful nursing would be easier (but that's probably because I don't remember exactly how it felt when he was a newborn).

 

Another thing I just read in the "Adv. in TN" book was how suprisingly big your toddler will seem when you are nursing a newborn, too. I bet that's true, because sometimes I can't believe how big he seems already!


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Old 12-18-2011, 05:30 PM
 
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Had a reply & it got eaten.

 

Anyway, yes toddlers seems very much like "big kids" once you have a newborn. You really have to struggle to remember that they're still little too.

 

Tickle works as a description. To me it feels like he's flicking his tongue against me. Over & over & over...*shudder* I've heard it's a pregnancy thing and goes away as soon as the baby is born. I sure hope so!


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Old 12-19-2011, 12:04 PM
 
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I know I will have to make myself remember that DS1 is still little... I was raised more in a "let's get them independent" way, but my husband's culture is more "family" oriented which I love (not that my family isn't loving, but they don't get the whole babywearing, still BF, etc things). I'm not in a hurry for DS1 to grow up, though, it's already happening too fast :)

 

How are you other nursing mamas doing? Anyone having qualms about trying to breastfeed 2? I'm not too nervous about having 2 to BF as much as I think I'm more nervous about BF a newborn and working on latch. I guess ignorance was bliss for me with DS1 as he needed minimal help with latching/eating. I'm a little scared that it might not go so easy this time even though I should "know" what I'm doing better.


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Old 12-25-2011, 12:39 PM
 
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Devaskyla View Post

Thanks for thinking of us. If he's nursing strongly, it's ok, but when he's just nursing slightly, it drives me crazy still. I think it's a difference in the way his tongue moves. I've been nursing him as long as I can manage to get him to sleep, then cuddling him when I can't take it anymore. Seems to wok well most nights. Most days he's not nursing at all during the day, so that makes me life easier. When he does, I usually limit him to a couple minutes on each side. And then he cuddles for a few minutes. At least he's usually not upset anymore about being limited. He hasn't really nursed during the night in a long time, unless he's having a really bad time.

 

Sending you "no molars" vibes for the next few weeks.

 

Somehow I think my dh would be less than impressed with 3+ years of nothing, too. lol

 

Ugh I totally get what you're saying about the lazy suckling. Absolutely drives me crazy. Also when she's so close to asleep that she loses her latch and then latches back on when she starts sucking again (making a "pop!" noise) I feel like I could scream.

 

Something that really helped us with daytime nursing was telling her we have to do it in the bedroom laying down. Not even on the couch laying down. Then she can't get distracted and she has to REALLY want it to agree to it, which most of the time she doesn't because she realizes that she'll fall asleep if she nurses in the bed.
 

 


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Old 01-13-2012, 01:14 PM
 
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How's it going  everyone? I can say that it is a love/hate thing for me. The first week I tried nursing them at the same time, but lately I have made DS1 wait until I was done. Naptime is the hardest if DS2 isn't asleep already. We also started night weaning the past 2 nights, b/c nighttime was too hard on me... nurse one then the other would wake, then do it all over again! DH has been sleeping with DS in his bed, and last night he didn't wake up at all for the first time ever!! Here's to hoping this is a new trend!

 

We were talking about our toddler's looking big compared to our newborns, but big is an understatement. DS1 has a big head anyway, but when he nurses he looks like a giant!!!

 

I wish I could say I love tandeming, and it does have it's awesome moments (DS1 is so tender to DS2 when i'm holding them both and one is nursing). But, it hurts and still feels weird when DS1 nurses. I'm hoping once the exhaustion wears off (if it does!), it will be easier.. especially if DS1 truly night weans.

 

Typing with one hand, so excuse the typos!


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Old 01-14-2012, 08:43 AM
 
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I've heard that the first few weeks tandem nursing are the hardest (baby isn't out yet, so I don't know yet for myself). Have you read Adventures in Tandem Nursing? I'm almost done with it and it's been really helpful in figuring out how we're going to do it. Also I went to a "Nursing and Beyond" meeting for my local LLL (it's meant for those nursing past a year) and it helped me a ton with figuring out how we're going to co-sleep and nurse and stuff like that. One mama suggested you on your back and a pillow on each side. Baby in the crook of your arm nursing on one side (arm resting on the pillow) and toddler laying on the pillow nursing on the other. Seems like the easiest way to nurse both while lying down.


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Old 02-25-2012, 10:34 PM
 
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How's tandem nursing going for everyone?

DD1 wanted to nurse more often than DD2 in the beginning. Then we were having latch issues. I decided to decrease DD1's nursing on purpose down to just before nap and before bed. I feel bad because she's still asking for it over and over, but I was feeling so irritated every time she nursed that I think it's better to not do it. Decreasing nursing and working on her latch (weirdly actually pointing my nipple down when she latches on helped) has made it a much more tolerable experience for me. Almost so much so that I could see increasing a bit again, but I don't want to hate it and try to decrease again after all the progress we've made.

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Old 02-29-2012, 01:26 PM
 
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LG, I read your earlier blog post, but haven't had a chance to comment. I'm going through almost the exact same issues! It's been really tough... especially with a demanding toddler that wants to nurse way more than a newborn! He is soo adamant (stubborn like his mama..haha!). I tried nursing less and he demanded it all.the.time! I tried nursing evertime he wanted and he still wanted it all.the.time! Things are sometimes better... the weather has been nice, so we can get outside a lot more... that helps on so many levels. I cannot distract him while we are inside for anything, but outside he could care less (even if DS2 is nursing). I have read most of "Adv. in TN". It helped to know that the struggles were something other people went through, too, but I still struggle with my feelings of guilt... mostly just wanting DS1 to "grow up and wean, already"... and knowing that he still needs to nurse (despite what DH says) vs. my desires. It's so hard when I was all gung-ho to let him nurse as long as he wanted, and now I want him to wean. I know he's cutting molars again, so that doesn't help the situation. I'm hoping when they finally poke through he will get some relief and not want to nurse as much. I think it sunk in for him the last couple of weeks that DS2 is here to stay for good... he has gotten a little rough a few times (trying to push DS2 out of my arms). I've been really trying to lay on the one-on-one attn thick, but sometimes it doesn't seem to matter he just wants to nurse and nothing else!

 

Hopefully everyone else is enjoying their tandem relationship! I wish I didn't feel so "ugh" about it, b/c it does have it's awesome moments!


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Old 02-29-2012, 07:31 PM
 
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I totally get what you mean. I tried for a couple of days letting her nurse every time she asked and I just ended those days feeling horribly irritated with uncomfortable nipples. I was hoping it would lose it's appeal if it wasn't something I was constantly saying no to.

 

I've been letting her nurse a little more, but I already had one day that I felt super irritated. I let her have her morning nurse again and she was super happy, but then at naptime we were at grandma's house so I tried to get her to nap on grandma's bed and it just didn't work (which is rare) and then about a half hour later we tried again. So we had one short and two long nursing sessions by 3pm and I was grinding my teeth at the end. Even with the fixed latch it's kind of irritating. Just makes me feel uneasy. I think it's just toddler nursing versus newborn, who I could care less if she nursed for 5 hours straight. Regardless, I've still let her had her morning nurse the last couple of mornings, even with me being irritated that day. I'm definitely nursing her when it's convenient for me and I feel like it though. I'm not sacrificing my sanity to make her happy. Happy mama is required to make happy kids.


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