When are you going on leave? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 08:01 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I made my decision to go on leave from work (not sure if I'll be returning since I take my national certification exam for what I went to school for in January..) on December 20th, I'll be just a few days shy of 38 weeks. And for whatever reason I'm feeling some sort of guilt (?) for going on leave 'early' and not working til my due date..is this rational?

 

I'm thinking of asking my boss if I can come back and work a couple hours a day a few days a week but I'm getting really exhausted at work standing on concrete and bagging groceries does a number on my back (I've shortened my shifts to 4-6 hours at a time). 

 

So anyway, when are you going on leave? How far along will you be?


Kaitlyn - 21, single mother to an adorable baby girl born 1/18/2012 (:

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#2 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 09:04 AM
 
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Don't feel guilty!  I haven't been working since Thanksgiving (I do contract work and just happened to not have anything going on) and around that time I was having some early Pre-E signs so it was good that i could stay home and eat, drink and rest.  But if I hadn't been out of work coincidentally I think I would have stopped working or cut back around that time anyway (34 weeks).  Now at 37 weeks I can't imagine having to do anything more than try to get my house clean, wrap presents etc for Christmas.  Part of the reason is that half of what I do is sitting at a computer and the other half is standing and instructing, neither of which is good to do for long periods of time in pregnancy!

 

So, Don't feel guilty!  If you can make it work I think you should stop working when you feel you need to.  The way I look at it is now that I'm 37 weeks and can technically have the baby "any time now" I don't want to exhaust myself doing anything (work, housework etc) in case I go into labor.  I'd rather be well rested when labor hits.  

 

 

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#3 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 10:14 AM
 
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Honey, you have nothing to feel guilty about.  I think VERY few women would be interested in working a job where they're on their feet an entire shift at 37/38 weeks pregnant if there were an alternative.  (Hell, I was a cashier when I was an active and very non-pregnant teenager, and even then I found myself exhausted after 8 hrs on my feet!  It is NOT easy to stand that long!)

 

My last day is Jan. 3rd, which will make me 38.5.  I was going to go right up until I gave birth, both for financial reasons and because I was soooo bored at the end of my last pregnancy, when I wasn't working at all.  But, a couple of things lined up to convince me to go on leave after all:  I found out that I qualify for short-term paid disability leave for up to 4 weeks before I give birth (so even if I go at 42 weeks, if I'm out from week 38 on, I'll get paid for all of that), I realized how little I love this job, and I've been having some physical problems (rapidly climbing BP, though no other pre-e signs yet, fingers crossed). 

 

 


Mother of two great little guys, G (9/28/09) and W (1/20/12)

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#4 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 10:29 AM
 
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God, I would pay millions if I could go on leave from my family right now.  And, no, I'm not kidding.  I want a damn break!!

 

I SAHM/WAHM so it's not an issue...I'll be working up to the day I give birth and then back to working (part-time, mind you) a few days later.

 

With my first I was able to move to desk duty (I was a social worker that spent all my time in the community) around 37 weeks and then worked up to 40w.  In fact the day I told my boss would be my last was the day I went into labor.  Good timing, I suppose.  BUT I also had an option of sitting comfortably, using the toilet whenever I wanted, snacking at will, etc.  I think that was light years away from what you're dealing with!

 

When it comes down to it you're going to be a mother and that means you have the next 50 years of your life to feel guilty about this and that.  It's the nature of the job.  Do NOT make this something to feel guilt over!  Enjoy your time off before the real work starts.


Angela
Chatty Girl - 3/2006, Lovey Boy - 1/2010, Delicious Baby Girl - 1/2012
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#5 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 10:34 AM
 
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I second ColdandSleepy...being on your feet all shift is hard work.  No reason to feel guilty at all.

 

I kinda wish I could do the same, but I need to get as many paychecks as I can before the baby comes (there are no "benefits" that I can fall back on for money from my company, once I leave).  My job is not physical, so I'm working up until I have the baby.  Wish I didn't have to - I would love to spend more time with my DD and get the house in more of an order.


Wife to Phil, Mom to Saoirse (3/09), and Niamh (1/12)  waterbirth.jpg.crochetsmilie.gif
 

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#6 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 10:46 AM
 
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I worked right up to the week before I was due with the first one--BUT I was charge, so I could take breaks at will, I switched to mostly duties that I could handle and was able to delegate the rest to my staff.  For me it was really good to stay active for that long!  You have the opposite situation, and in your case I'm almost surprised you made it this long!  You're one tough cookie Kaitlyn!  Kudos to you!  If you decide on an even earlier date don't let guilt in!  Doing what is good for your body and mental stamina is what is best for you, and by proxy what is best for that little nugget!

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#7 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 11:40 AM
 
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With my first I worked full time up until my due date and would have kept working except my boss made me stop.  Then I sat at home for 2 weeks since he was so late.  It sucked.  This time, I hope to work until I have the baby - my boss now is much more flexible and the other vets would cover for me if I went into labor at short notice for work.  I just work 20 hrs a week outside the home and it's almost easier than keeping a 2.5 yr old entertained.  It's a fairly physical job but at least at work I have a great support staff to help me!  I'm also going to go back much sooner - probably after 4-5 weeks for 1/2 days on Saturday when my husband is home.  Since I'm just part time I don't get any short term disability coverage and I'm the primary income for the family so I also don't have much of a choice financially.

 

I'm probably the exception in that I want to keep working!  Kaitlyn, you should NOT feel guilty at all.  Most people start their leave a few weeks early.  It's hard on our bodies and there is a lot to do to get ready!  Enjoy your time and take it easy.  Not many of us have had the school/work load that you've had for this pregnancy.  You deserve to have a little break before baby gets here!

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#8 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 11:44 AM
 
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i'd really like to work up until i have this baby, but like others, my job is not physical and i have complete control over when i take breaks, if I want to be sitting or standing, and even my in and out times are pretty flexible. but i have to use my sick time for my maternity leave and don;t want to use more than i have to before the baby actually comes, otherwise, that's that much more unpaid time i have to take. Plus, with my dd, my mw made me stop working about two weeks before my due date and i about went stir crazy waiting for the baby to come (she was 10 days late!) and even though life is more hectic with one kid at home, I just know i'd get cabin fever.

 

all that being said, if i had to be on my feet the whole shift, i definitely would be considering stopping now (i'm 36 wks), or even sooner...so don't feel guilty at all!!!

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#9 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 12:47 PM
 
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I would love to start my leave already but am hoping to work up to the end. I have a horrible ear infection/ sinus infection/ pink eye that I am miserable. Add to that I am up all night going to the bathroom or with insomnia and it stinks. Everyone says the last month is the hardest but I had no idea it was this uncomfortable.

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#10 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 01:55 PM
 
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I will be done with work after this Friday! I am a Montessori toddler teacher, so my job is extremely physical - I spend all day with twelve lovely toddlers! The school I work at closes for winter break after the 16th, so that's it for me...no point in going back at the start of January at 38.5 weeks! I am having a bit of guilt over stopping so early (35.5 wks). I probably would have tried to work until a week or two before my due date if the semester break wasn't there. I am very thankful for this time off though - I have been working full time since I was 14, and am not really sure what to do with myself with all the time I will have smile.gif

Mama to DD born 1/28/12, and baby #2 on the way in January '14!

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#11 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 02:19 PM
 
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I finished my last final on the 12th, and I've already stopped working because my contract ended (and there was no funding to renew it anyways, not that they would have done so right away... I worked for a non-profit health care cooperative) I am so grateful for this 'nesting' time I have (even if it is financially terrifying - let's just say no one is getting Christmas gifts this year).

 

I looked at leaving work as one of the first assertive steps I took of hopefully many to put my family first. 

 

I'd say if you are feeling moved to reduce or eliminate work at this time, there is no reason to feel guilty! I felt guilty too - like I should have found another job that I could have worked for the extra month (really) so we'd have extra money... And so many women kept telling me stories of how they worked until their babies were nearly born on their desks and speaking about it sounding very proud of their choice, so I really didn't have anyone to talk to who was on the side of "it's good to do what you need to do to take care of yourself, even if that means leaving work early..."

 

 


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#12 of 13 Old 12-14-2011, 02:56 PM
 
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I won't really get a full leave. I have to finish up my winter births prior to my baby coming and then will have postpartum visits and will still be doing prenatal visits for people who are due in the spring. I plan on rescheduling any visits that fall within the week of me having my baby or having the women see another midwife if they need to be seen right away, but otherwise it will just be work as normal.


Erika, mama to three beautiful kids (plus one gestating), and wife to one fantastic man.

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#13 of 13 Old 12-16-2011, 03:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I love reading these responses (; I also love how good you ladies make me feel about my decisions. There aren't enough thanks in the world for how reassuring you all are to me..my mind wants to work longer but my body has had it. I've gained so much weight in a short amount of time that I'm really just exhausted. I'm going to try and locate some people who may need short term babysitting as a way to make a wee bit extra money in the meantime since I'm not comfortable not doing anything..and the less I have to do the more time I have to dwell on the 'woulda coulda shouldas' so I'm going to try and remain busy. (: 

 

If I didn't have a job standing on my feet all that - or a job that actually provided adequate breaks - I would go right up until I gave birth. 


Kaitlyn - 21, single mother to an adorable baby girl born 1/18/2012 (:

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