1/20/2012...with a challenge! - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 05:32 AM - Thread Starter
 
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How's everybody doing today?  Who delivered last night?  I can't wait to hear of our newest arrivals!!

 

Things here are fairly boring.  I am still looking for a dresser/changing table (I went to get the one yesterday and someone bought it shortly after I left the day before!).  I might run up to some stores by my folks house and deliver flowers to their house for their 39th wedding anniversary. :)

 

And now...your challenge!  If you haven't delivered yet take a "mama's eye view" of your belly and post it.  Bonus points if we can see your toes in it!


Angela
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#2 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 06:04 AM
 
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Still here-- but-- I've been in what we're really hoping is really early labor for 18 hrs now.  My contractions have progressed ever so slowly from 3 minutes apart to 1:30 apart.  I just finally got up from 5 hours of the worst sleep ever, sleeping every 2 minutes and then waking myself up moaning, because it just wasn't restful and everything is way too intense lying down.  

 

I'm drinking some water and then I think I'm going to put my pants on and go for a walk around the block.  Things need to either move forward or backward... I feel like being outside and in motion will help with that.


Mother of two great little guys, G (9/28/09) and W (1/20/12)

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#3 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 06:17 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Exciting!  I hope this is it for you!!


Angela
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#4 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 07:29 AM
 
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Headed to the OB for an 11am appt.  Just had a talk with my dh about what "might" happen today and what we should be prepared for.  It was a bit like a pregame huddle.  LOL.

 

All joking aside, he thinks that my fluid will be lower than it has been and that they'll want us to check into the hospital today to have this baby.  He knows another couple to whom that has recently happened, but they were doctoring with the practice that we left, so it doesn't surprise me. 

 

After a FLOOD of tears, I think we settled on letting things go through the weekend should everything look the same today as Tuesday (with progress to my cervix).  I'd like to say that "we won't make it that long", but, alas, I've said that for the last two weeks.  :(

 

42 weeks .. and the real pressure ... comes tomorrow.  I'll be back to vent this afternoon!

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#5 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 08:22 AM
 
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No baby here last night. I was up for a portion of the night with contractions that were really achey, but not intense and MORE show (seriously, how much could there be in there???) but no baby. I am now hanging out at 4-5 cms, so I just need labor to start in earnest and I will be ready to rock and roll. I am crossing my fingers for this weekend as my schedule next week is wide open so I could have 1 week to rest before going back to work. 

 

I have a photo of my belly from about 10 days ago. It has been a very long time since I last saw my feet :)

view of belly.jpg


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#6 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 08:54 AM
 
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My tummy at work.  Last day of work!

20120120094913.jpg


Wife to Phil, Mom to Saoirse (3/09), and Niamh (1/12)  waterbirth.jpg.crochetsmilie.gif
 

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#7 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 10:45 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Nakey belly!

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c81/africanqueen99/395w.jpg

 

No luck on the dresser.  I swear to all things holy...I *know* to not waffle on things that I find in thrift stores so why did I not just buy the one I wanted on the first day?!


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#8 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 11:49 AM
 
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Nothing new here either.  Tomorrow is my EDD but I've never counted on this little guy being on time so I'm not anxious or stressed.  I'm scheduled to work until I have him so I'd really like to get in at least 2 more days (Sat and Mon).  I told him that Tues would be a convenient day to arrive!  Of course he'll probably wait way longer!

 

Today my mom, son, and I ran errands, went out for lunch, and let DS play at the indoor play area in the mall.  I have a batch of liquid hand soap cooking on the stove since we were getting really low.  It smells good!   I also need to sew a gift for a birthday party on Sunday.  Got the fabric I needed today.  Other than that everything has been quiet. 

 

I'll take a picture and post it in a bit!

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#9 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 12:03 PM
 
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P1020915.JPG

 

My belly - day before my due date!

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#10 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 12:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
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^^^ Love the sweater!

 

Ok, I'm a dope.  If you use photobucket which of the four code options do you use to put the picture directly into the post and not just link it like I did?


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#11 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 12:39 PM
 
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Oh well ... unless there is a miracle in the next 12 hrs or so, I lost my battles today.  :(

 

My OB appt started at 11am and lasted until 2:30pm.  Baby, fluid, etc is all fine -- 1 cm dialated and 70% effaced.  Dr. wanted me to admit to the hospital this afternoon since tomorrow will be 42 weeks.  My husband and I had compromised before we left that Monday would be okay as a compromise if necessary -- he'd give me the weekend.  Well, she scared the living daylights out of him and he's sitting in the office asking me to "just appease him" by scheduling it for Sunday.  Well,  they don't do that on Sundays and when every other day in the beginning of next week was booked and I flat out REFUSED today, they gave us tomorrow. 

 

I spent the last 2 hours (including time spent at the OB) sobbing hysterically.  :(  DH and i got to the point in the office while we were waiting for the doc that we weren't speaking, i was getting worked up, and I don't know about you ladies, but I sweat BUCKETS during this pregnancy.  OB demanded I get another Strep B test and though I refused, she told me they'd give the baby antibiotics automatically if I didn't, and I don't know what to believe anymore, so I just took off my pants and let her do her thing.  I was, of course, all sweaty so she felt the need to test to see if I was leaking fluid.  I wasn't leaking fluid.  But I was sobbing.  I was so mad I asked my dh to leave the room ... which just made him get up and try to console me ... and I pulled away.  I know this sounds childish, but then the OB starts asking if I have a history of depression.  SHE JUST DOESN'T GET IT -- AND NEITHER DOES HE.  It didn't have to be this way .... I feel such disappointment and failure I can't even express it in words.

 

Will I be happy to be off of this expectation roller coaster?  Sure.  But I wouldn't trade sanity for the natural birth for which I Had prepared.  Not to mention that I AM fearful of the induction ... that I'll end up with a c-section.  To the drs, it's a better risk to take than a stillborn baby ... of course to my dh, too .... but they see things worlds different than me.

 

Sorry to dump on you guiys, but I feel very alone and abandoned right now.  Even my mom thinks this could be all for the good .... and I can't for the life of me understand why God chose someone willing to go the distance to have a natural birth to draw this out and make it so that I don't even have a choice int he matter. 

 

So sad today.  :(

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#12 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 12:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm sorry to hear this, Lisa.  I completely understand your feelings on inducing.  For my last pregnancy I went over and my OB said something along the lines of "If you don't have the baby by the next appointment then we will have to have a conversation about inducing."  So, all week, I stressed and stressed over it.  I called friends (mind you, I have nobody IRL that is as naturally minded as me, but they tried to listen and empathize) and heard the same things you're hearing.  I was mentally in a rough place because I already knew what natural childbirth was all about and just *thinking* about inducing scared the shit out of me.  Anyway, the next appointment was supposed to be on Monday.  So the Sunday afternoon before *the big day* I found a local place that sold the cohashes and went to buy them.  Then I drove home and spent the entire drive talking to my son and telling him that I was here for him and that I *really* needed him to come out.  I explained my fears to him.  I told him how great life in our family is.  I just spent that 30 minutes sharing my inner most thoughts with my baby boy.  And you know what?  He was born that night.  He got to pick his birthday, but my body and mind felt better just telling him that I needed him to listen and join us.  My mind couldn't birth him until I let go of the stress of the "what ifs"...and it worked.

 

I know it doesn't work for everybody like that, but maybe you can just go off on your own and really talk to your baby.  Get your head in the game and stop thinking about your husband and your doctor - they don't understand what you're saying and are trying to consider the health of the baby.

 

I know it sucks, though.

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#13 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 04:08 PM
 
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I'm really sorry Lisamarie!   I would be equally worried and upset.  I guess if I end up having to face an induction, I will call my hypnobirthing instructor and have her come and do another fear-releasing session with me.  Is this an option for you?  While I know an induction will not provide you with the birth you dreamed of, I know of women how have still had a natural, vaginal delivery even being induced with pitocin.  Will they use pitocin, cervidol, or ARM? I think hypnobirthing is a great preparation for being able to deal with an induction.  I know once your little one arrives, you will just be so overjoyed despite the means of his/her arrival. 

 

I think trying to get into the most positive mindset tonight will be so important for a successful induction tomorrow.  Maybe take a long, relaxing bath, listen to your hypnobirthing tracts, talk to your little one.  Try to come to peace with it - although I know it will be hard.  I know that you know that all the stress and anxiety you are feeling is only going to hinder the whole process.  Picture a smooth and successful induction with no further interventions.  Think of how proud of yourself you should be to bring your little one into the world peacefully and naturally even if things had to get started with a little help.

 

We will all be thinking good and positive thoughts for you tomorrow.  You can still do it!  (And I will remind myself to re-read my own words should I be in your situation in a couple weeks!)

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#14 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 04:28 PM
 
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lisamarie I am so sorrry. I'm so angry for you. Even f'ing ACOG says after 42 COMPLETED weeks, not at the beginning of 42 weeks. I'd be really tempted to have some thing happen to keep you from going tomorrow as there's absolutely no medical reason for you to be induced.  Just out of curiousity, what is your family history regarding length of pregnancy? How long was pregnancy for your mother, grandmother, even great grandmother (if you can find out). It could be that you're actually a 10 month mama. Or it could be that your dates are off. If your due date is based on LMP and you have longer cycles than 28 days, then it could easily be several days off.

 

10 months mama articles http://www.birthemissary.com/1/post/2011/09/10-month-mama-patience-in-pregnancy-past-42-weeks.html

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/pregnancy/pregnancy-health/lobbying-grows-for-the-10-month-baby/article1757689/ http://news.icm.ac.uk/science/10-month-mama/7543/

 

There used to be a website whose owner routinely went to 46ish weeks. She had a section on "10 month mamas" with lots of stories, Sadly, the site disappeared years ago and now all the archives seem to be gone as well. This is a link to some stuff someone copied from it, though. http://angusbirthcompanion.moonfruit.com/ten-month-mamas/4520942714 I don't agree with all of it, but there's some good stuff and a lot of reassurance.

 

 

I have nothing to report, unfortunately. Except that I'm obviously getting very stressed, I had a complete melt down today because I couldn't find the needle I need to finish making N's stocking. I was finding it all the time months ago and now I need it, it's nowhere to be found. I'm sure dh thinks I'm completely insane.

 

Anyway, I just posted to reply to lisamarie and so you guys don't think I've dropped off the earth/had this baby.


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#15 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 04:30 PM
 
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Lisa, just wanted to let you know I'm rooting for you!  I ditto what Juneboymom said, use any resources you have available to get your mind in the right space for the current circumstance. I can definitely understand how you feel and just know that you do have some people who totally empathize.  And there is still time Mama!  I know you have the appointment, but maybe you can keep working your husband to get him on board to giving you the weekend, and then use every trick in your arsenal to coax this little one out by then.  Sending you labor vibes!

 

For me, I'm feeling a little discouraged... I've been having a decent amount of BH and cervical pinchiness for days now, but it doesn't feel like its going anywhere.  It's hard to not focus on it too.


Happy Wife Since '05 and NEW MOM! in '12

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#16 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 06:16 PM
 
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Oh, ladies, thank you so much for your eyes, ears, and concern.  smile.gif  Here's an update:

 

When I last wrote, I was simply hysterical.  Part of that hysteria was brought on by the doc I saw today.  She's the one who gave me a litany about rejecting the 28 week Rhogam shot (I'm Rh neg) and, in so doing, flat out asked me if I even wanted her to check the baby's heartrate because that "might not matter either"!  I think she's a woman who is passionate about her cause and purpose -- I do recognize that doctors just do not understand (yet I go there anyway -- thanks dh!).  But, since I am also that way, we don't mesh well.  Today, after allowing her to explain how a labor resulting in c-section would be soooo much better than a stillbirth, she had my hubby convinced.  On top of feeling bullied and, I also had an overwhelming sensation of guilt ... we sat in the room not looking at each other or speaking -- but when she (the doc) came back to see what we had decided, DH was the one to tell her to schedule for Monday.  Problem was, Monday was booked -- we sent her back for Tuesday -- Tuesday was booked -- we sent her back for Sunday (they don't do sunday) -- and finally had to settle on Saturday.  By the third time she returned, I was in full-fledged hysteria and just felt like the universe was showing me who was boss!  I continued to sob ....

 

So, she makes the "appt" for tomorrow and can't resist herself to stop there -- it's been more than 4 weeks since my last group b strep, so we need to do one.  I told her NO, I was negative last time, we're not doing that.  Her response?  "Well, then its likely that your pediatrician will just administer antiobiotics to your baby upon birth."  So I stood up in my sobbing hysteria, took of my pants and got in the saddle.  THAT WASN'T ENOUGH FOR HER.  I was sweating like a pig .... she thought it might be that my water broke and felt the need to do all these tests on it as I lay there a mess.  She tells me to get up and then realized she forgot to do the strep test.  Did I tell this story already?!  LOL.  I think I may have.  Anyway, it was at this point I asked Al to leave because I wanted to kick this bitch in the face.  The nurse asked her what was wrong with me and she explained that "things aren't going the way she would've liked".  Still ... the insults weren't over.

 

THEN she proceeds to ask me if I have a history of depression and when I kindly explained that I was just incredibly upset about this change of events, she told me I should go talk to someone if I can't control my emotions like that.  I, again, KINDLY said "I don't mean to be rude, but the less you say at this point, the better."   The woman just couldn't shut up.  I didn't say another word to her during our time there .. I walked as fast as I could out the door and lost it. 

 

On the way home, my DH suggested calling them back to see if we could go to a hospital 1 hr away to get the Monday appt.  (This physician group practices here, but has a HUGE hospital about 1 hr away.)  It was thoughtful of him and perhaps I should've taken the extra time he was offering, but I just felt completely defeated. 

 

My mom is really good about snapping  me back into shape.  :)  She was sympathetic, but helped me see that this may have to happen, not because I need it medically, but because its just in my cards.  She also helped me realize how the baby was not getting anything good from my outburst.  The feeling of failure and disappointment kept tears welling up into my eyes for another hour or so, but I eventually came around.  By that time, my DH was totally bummed and felt shitty -- headache, nausea, etc.  I basically blamed him for the whole thing because I told the truth:  if he wasn't in the picture, I would be waiting it out until WHENEVER it was the right time ... I didn't care what that or any other doc said.  I don't believe that lines they are feeding me and I'm not worried about all of their risks.  What I am worried about is the havoc I just agreed to let them wreek (sp?) on me.  I know he felt/feels bad ... everyone just wants a healthy baby and no one around me knows that we've got that regardless ....

 

I've been back-and-forth with my hypnobirthing instructor who, while wonderful, is far too compromising.  She tried to be encouraging and let me know she'd be around tomorrow and that I can call should I want her to be there as my doula, but she's all like "don't feel bad if you decide in favor of epidural", etc.  I know she's trying to make me feel better .... but it didn't work.  :)

 

AFRICANQUEEN99:  I wish I could do what you suggested.  I tried all week to "bond" with the baby ... to talk to him/her and convince it it's okay to come out.  I didn't really beg, but I guess I should, huh?  lol.  Probably part of my problem is that I feel disconnected from it -- perhaps because I don't know the sex?  I don't know ... I don't feel a bond and I don't know how to do it.  Even with the prospect of he/she arriving tomorrow, I feel like the whole thing is still quite unreal.  I've probably brought all of this on myself ....

 

DEVASKYLA sent me some hypnobaby tracks (I got them and they work great ... i will do them tonight!) that focus on the baby coming out ... I will try to convince him/her while doing those tracks.  THANK YOU!!!  :)

 

I'm not completely hopeless, either.  I know that my body works and I know that baby is totally healthy.  I know that just by accepting what is supposed to happen tomorrow might help it happen tonight. 

 

I'll post sometime if I am successful and get to labor at home ... otherwise, I'll talk to you ladies postpardum!

 

Thanks again for all of your insight and support.

 

 

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#17 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 06:34 PM
 
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Your mom sounds a lot like mine. They were pressuring me to induce with ds1 (ON my due date, because the idiot dr just kind of out the wheel in the general right place, which was several days off). I basically told him I wasn't coming in, he told me my baby could die & that he wasn't taking responsibility, I told him that was fine (& I wish I'd told him I knew he was talking out of someplace other than his mouth). Then we told my mom what happened and both her & my sister started calling, begging me to listen to the dr because obviously he knew better and I was just going to have to suck it up etc. Dh finally hung up on hem & disconnected the phone because they were stressing me so much.

 

Honestly, it's your body, not theirs. They don't have to live with the possible physical consequences of an induction. My dh will never forgive himself for not getting me out of the hospital and trusting my judgement. It took me over a year to recover from the physical damage and a lot longer to mostly recover from the emotional. And a lot of that time was spent very resentful of dh. It nearly destroyed our marriage.  I don't say this to scare you, but to let you know that it's important you don't do anything just to placate other people. It might make them happy short term, but if it doesn't work out well, you may have a very hard time forgiving them for forcing you into it.


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#18 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 06:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Please, please, PLEASE don't think I wrote what I did to say you've brought this on yourself.  I would never even think that!  It's so hard when you're in a high stress situation (which pregnancy is...and then you throw in those stupid dates and everybody thinks you're insane for not inducing) to think clearly.  It's also very hard to bond with fetuses.  I had a whole thread about it once upon a time.  I feel for you, Lisa.  I really do.


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#19 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 07:48 PM
 
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Lisamarie.....I'm speechless at your experience and so sad no one is listening to what *you* need. I hope whatever you do, that you have a positive experience. 

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#20 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 09:38 PM
 
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Lisamarie- im a stalker but I wanted to tell you that my heart goes out to you!! A bit of my background, it took ivf to concieve and I had a rough beginning and the specialist they sent me to was heartless!!! She basically told me oh well figure out how to deal with it if you loss this baby but we cant do anything for you.... I changed practices to an obgyn I love but with you its the end and I can understand how helpless you feel!!! I hope you feel more in control soon!! I know how hard it is to express yourself when your upset. I myself find it hard to get any words out!! Good luck tomorrow maybe they can offer some less invasive things like nipple stimulation or just a cervix rippening .... All I know is I hate pitocin and never want it again, I just hoping things start going your way!! Good luck you will be in my thoughts!! joy.gif
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#21 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 10:10 PM
 
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Just wanted to quickly post my belly shot with my upside down henna. :)

 

41weeks.jpg


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#22 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 10:28 PM
 
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I have got to the point where I am not even bothering to keep track of contractions anymore.  I figure when they get to the point where they are too painful or my water breaks...then I will pay attention smile.gif  I can't handle getting excited/anxious about every single one. Frustrating.

 

Went to the hospital this afternoon for my NST.  The nurse informed me that 20 women delivered today.  I wish it was contagious!

 

I am going to try and have a serious talk with my LO...maybe he will decide he's ready to come out now.  Its worth a try :o)

 

Strong positive vibes out to all of you!!


Mother of one hyperactive little boy bouncy.gif(9/07) and expecting baby number 2 (Henry Magnus!) on January 25th.

 

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#23 of 32 Old 01-20-2012, 10:58 PM
 
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Hugs chili... that's exactly where I was at too mentally when I finally actually went into labor yesterday.

 

Speaking of which... I had my baby!  Wren Louis, 9 lbs 2 oz, 22 inches long... born this afternoon after 25 hours of early labor, 1.5 hours of crazy active labor, and 11 minutes of pushing.  He had the cord around his neck when he was born and a mouth full of meconium (yuck) and was floppy and unresponsive at first, so we ended up on a bit of a rollercoaster to the NICU and such.  But he bounced back "surprisingly" quickly (according to the on-call pediatrician) and is doing great now and is back snuggled in bed next to me right now.

 

6734287689_3dfc5d1f25.jpg


Mother of two great little guys, G (9/28/09) and W (1/20/12)

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#24 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 12:07 AM
 
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Congratulations!


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#25 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 12:59 AM
 
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Aw, he's gorgeous!!!  How frightening to have his first few moments be so tense!!  I love the name.  Where did you come up with it?

 

BTW- its 4 am where I am at...wide awake.  Not that I could sleep even if I wanted to because our moron of a neighbor has decided its necessary to snowblow his driveway and the road in front of his house in the last hour- for the whole 2 stinking inches of snow we have.  Really?!  Damned good thing I don't have a sleeping baby yet jackass!!

Aaahhh...I have definitely reached the angry/bitter/easily irritated pregnant stage!  mischievous.gif  Watch out everyone...haha


Mother of one hyperactive little boy bouncy.gif(9/07) and expecting baby number 2 (Henry Magnus!) on January 25th.

 

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#26 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 01:27 AM
 
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Looking up videos for acupressure points to get labour going. Having a minor contraction after trying 1 point.

 

If anyone is interested, the 2 best videos I've found so far are http://www.wonderhowto.com/how-to-induce-labor-naturally-and-safely-with-pressure-points-235121/ & http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnEcLSHTI0s


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#27 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 06:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Weeeeee!!  Welcome to the world, Wren!  You're gorgeous!


Angela
Chatty Girl - 3/2006, Lovey Boy - 1/2010, Delicious Baby Girl - 1/2012
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#28 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 06:47 AM
 
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Congrats, Coldandsleepy!


Wife to Phil, Mom to Saoirse (3/09), and Niamh (1/12)  waterbirth.jpg.crochetsmilie.gif
 

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#29 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 07:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Devaskyla View Post

Just wanted to quickly post my belly shot with my upside down henna. :)

 

41weeks.jpg


LOVE it!  I meant to ask in the other thread, but did your husband freehand that?  It's uber cool.

 


Angela
Chatty Girl - 3/2006, Lovey Boy - 1/2010, Delicious Baby Girl - 1/2012
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#30 of 32 Old 01-21-2012, 04:35 PM
 
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The butterfly & the top part of the "frame" you can see in that picture I did with stencil, plus the little piece just inside the frame on the left in that shot. Dh did the rest freehand.


mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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