Hi there! I'm not a midwife, but I am in the same place as you... 2 little kiddos, plus I want more, so it wil be a while (seems like forever) before I get to begin formal learning & apprenticeship. So, for now I am reading midwifery texts. I figure any preliminary exposure will make studying easier on me in the future. If you want a decent guideline for what to read, I use the reading list on the texasmidwives.com site. As far as what happens when a birth goes wrong, that is also my greatest fear. However, I have heard it said that the fear subsides as you gain knowledge and experience. I look forward to getting to that place! Good luck!
Ooh, you could also do CPR certification and/or A&P classes, which are required by some programs
Believing, doting, simplifying, caffeinating, baking, midwife in training, and mothering like a dirty hippie.
#3 due in April!