I hands down recommend getting an experienced doula in on the birth scene- I myself would never give birth without one, though I believe finances are playing into my friend's decision to go without all together. Meaning it will be her husband and I with her.
Words of wisdom? Advice?
"Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you."
read Birth Partner by Penny Simkin, depending on how much time you have you can also look at the recommended reading for doula training courses, here is DONA's list
How long do you have till your friend's due date? There are many books and videos to give yourself a crash course on doula support.
Also, if you're not comfortable being the main doula-type support, and your friend is concerned about money, maybe you can find a newly trained doula in your area who is willing to work for free or a reduced fee?
Books I suggest:
This is a great overview of labor and pushing positions:
This video has some techniques for massage and pain relief in labor:
This video is a great childbirth ed. crash course, and it has some wonderful visuals for labor and pushing positions:
The best of luck to you and your friend on this journey!
Many newly trained doulas may be willing to forgo charging or charge very little in order to get births toward their certification. Perhaps see if there are any doula training courses in your area or a DONA contact where you could find a newly trained doula.
Otherwise, I second the recommendation for the Birth Partner. It is written with doulas and dad's in mind as the birth parters and is a great reference. I keep it in my doula bag! There are also drawings of different positions that you will find helpful.
Married to my love , Mommy to W ('09) and Doula.
God has answered our prayers & we welcomed our baby girl earth side 11/24/13
If all you do is be there for your friend, it could make all the difference. Don't feel like you need to read a bunch of books or learn a bunch of new skills. They did a study where the labor support/doula did nothing but sit in the room while the woman was in labor and answer questions if she was asked. She didn't touch the woman at all. And the study showed that women had better outcomes just by a supportive knowledgeable person being in the room. Your friend asked you to be there for a reason. Maybe she finds your presence calming, or you've been there through tough times with her in the past. Talk to her about what kind of birth she would like to have, practice some comfort measures with her and see what you can do to support here. Good luck!
Married to a wonderful woman since 2010. Baby boy C arrived in June 2013!
Check out our User Agreement.
I suggest any of the Ina May Gaskin books and just making sure you protect the birth space and support her husband. Some people at a birth don't realize the little things that can throw a mom off so just be in tune to what she needs.
|Doula , Doula Students|