Baby #4 - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-17-2011, 09:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Got a huge BFP just a little bit ago. This is baby #4 for me, my other 3 kiddos are 8yo, 2yo, and 9mo old. We are planning a UP/UC except one visit to confirm the pregnancy and to be sure on dates I know the OB will order an US. joy.gif


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Old 06-17-2011, 10:35 PM
 
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Awesome! I also got a super dark BFP today, this is #4 for us, and we are also doing UP/UC:-)


Jackie and Rafael (4/15/04)
DS (4/25/05) my unschooled airbending pokemon wizard 
DD (10/05/06) my spirited pixie, who weaned at 3 yrs 10 months
DD (7/27/09) my UC water baby - I mean toddler!

DS (2/21/12) UC #2! My littlest love

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Old 06-23-2011, 10:32 PM
 
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Um...just took the test a few min ago...#4 for us, too. O.M.G!!! Every time I get pg (we were always "trying"), I still get freaked out when it happens, like "uh, oh man, what have I just done?!" lol. Obviously this is REALLY early, I'm due end of Feb/beg of March (I know the date I concieved, but never share the due date...TOO. MUCH. PRESSURE!!!)

 

With G-d's help, we will be having another happy, healthy homebirth...and finding a new used car so that everyone will fit. Palm to forehead.


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Old 06-24-2011, 01:13 PM
 
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Congrats! I am prego w/ baby#4. My IUD failed! Holy Crap! Surprise! My last period was April 17th so I had an ultrasound 2weeks ago to confirm IUD gone BUT couldn't confirm a baby! Today they did follow up and we heard the heart beat. I cried so hard! Because even though this pregnancy was a shocker, I spent 2 weeks dreading a miscarriage everyday! With my previous pregnancies I never worried... This time that's all I've done! I have no prego symptoms either. Now, I am just happy and grateful that I have a gift with no morning sickness! I am due Feb.14th 2012! I am planning a water birth @ birthing center in Portland, OR. What about any of you guys? I am really going to need a baby moon with this little critter. My kidlets at home are Victoria Winter 14yrs, Jack 6yrs and Rowan 4yrs!

hugs!

Jessica

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Old 06-25-2011, 09:01 AM
 
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#4 here, too! Got a "holy crap" BFP last night. We were definitely not trying to have another baby right now--our kiddis are 4 1/2, 2, and 5 months. I got pregnant during my first postpartum cycle and we only DTD once! Guess God really wants us to have another one! eyesroll.gif

 

We're moving across state in 2 weeks and I've already started researching midwives in the area. I'm sad that the midwives who caught all 3 of my babies won't get to catch this one, but it's going to be a new adventure. thumb.gif


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Old 06-25-2011, 11:33 AM - Thread Starter
 
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#4 here, too! Got a "holy crap" BFP last night. We were definitely not trying to have another baby right now--our kiddis are 4 1/2, 2, and 5 months. I got pregnant during my first postpartum cycle and we only DTD once! Guess God really wants us to have another one! eyesroll.gif

 

We're moving across state in 2 weeks and I've already started researching midwives in the area. I'm sad that the midwives who caught all 3 of my babies won't get to catch this one, but it's going to be a new adventure. thumb.gif



LOL I hear you on not trying for another one! This is one is planned but my 2nd and 3rd are 11 months and 2 days apart. Middle one was born October 28, 2009 and the little one right now was born September 30, 2010. But we are more then likely done this time if this one is a girl. If not we want to try one more time. After that we are DONE! LOL


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Old 06-25-2011, 02:44 PM
 
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Good luck sister! I understand about changing midwives... mine relocated to another town. So I'm looking too! Do you plan to go to a birthing center or have a homebirth? I like the idea of homebirth, but honestly.. we live in an apartment! Could you imagine the neighbors! Ha! (We're catholic too!)  

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Old 06-25-2011, 03:14 PM
 
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I've birthed in an apartment and my neighbors never knew. lol. I think it's really exciting that there is a little group of us expecting our 4th. I'm really glad I posted on here and found you all. My kids are 6, 4.5 and 1.5. All are homeschooled in a super tiny house. I'm a die hard homebirther. Still nursing my little one, though trying to cut back a bit. Nausea hits me early and I've already got the waves of it with this one. Praying and praying that everything will be good. I am super psyched! I hear after 3, it's all pretty mellow. I hope so. :)

 

Congrats to all of us, and as we say in Israel, B'sha'ah tova ([the birth should be] in a good hour)


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Old 06-25-2011, 03:30 PM
 
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Okay, just posting so that I can change my subscription notification from nothing to something. lol.


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Old 06-25-2011, 05:48 PM
 
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Originally Posted by londongandert View Post

Good luck sister! I understand about changing midwives... mine relocated to another town. So I'm looking too! Do you plan to go to a birthing center or have a homebirth? I like the idea of homebirth, but honestly.. we live in an apartment! Could you imagine the neighbors! Ha! (We're catholic too!)  


Our insurance will only cover CNMs, so we'll probably end up having this one in a hospital, but one of my online friends has used this particular group and speaks highly of them. There is a freestanding birth center where we're moving, but it would be completely out of pocket and we're a single income family, so I don't know if that's going to be an option this time. greensad.gif

 


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Old 06-26-2011, 08:00 PM
 
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Hi Everyone!  I'm expecting #4 also!  We're excited but a little apprehensive because of our age spacing.  I have three boys (9,7 and 5).  I've had multiple miscarriages since my youngest was born.  I'm so hoping it works out this time.  My last two boys were born at home.  My 7 year old was born in the tub and my youngest son was UC.  I found a midwife that I loved and because of all my miscarriages I will have her at the homebirth.  I'm so glad there are so many Mama's expecting #4.  I'm the only person I know that wants four little ones.


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Old 06-27-2011, 02:12 AM
 
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I'm also psyched about this group for us expecting #4. It's the one I look most forward to checking!


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Old 06-30-2011, 01:54 PM
 
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so...hi. :) What week is everyone? I'm still super early, due @ the end of the month. We have 1 girl and 2 boys...I really have a feeling this is a girl. Anyone else have any gender predictions about their babes?


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Old 06-30-2011, 02:01 PM
 
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how do you multi quote? I'm clicking on multi and then reply at the bottom of the pg, but it's not coming up. :/

 

 


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Old 06-30-2011, 02:32 PM
 
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Als o expecting #4. My boys are 5, 3, and 1 :)


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Old 07-01-2011, 11:27 AM
 
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so...hi. :) What week is everyone? I'm still super early, due @ the end of the month. We have 1 girl and 2 boys...I really have a feeling this is a girl. Anyone else have any gender predictions about their babes?



I'll be 6 weeks tomorrow (woohoo!), due the 25th. All my babies have come before their EDD, though, so I"m predicting around the 20th. The 14th would be so cool, but I think that'd be pushing it. eyesroll.gif

We have 2 girls and a boy, so I think evening things out would be nice, but I must admit that I do love buying pretty girly things for my girls. orngbiggrin.gif Either way, I'll be thrilled. 


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Old 07-06-2011, 08:46 PM
 
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Hello Ladies!

I love our expecting #4 group! Way excited for all of us. love.gif I love sharing this unique pregnancy with you, I know I will be chatting more on this thread then any other in my Mothering.com life! I am still so new, that I have trouble with the abbreviations... where do you guys come up with this stuff? Am I missing a link or what? What does UP/UC mean? (Thanks for any clue, really!)

Help! What are you going to do about transport? What do real people drive that sits 6+ passengers and groceries? Hate to sound bias, but I just never considered a minivan or an SUV. My Subaru legacy has been perfect.. until now. Remember in the early 80's  big families had station wagons and all the kids just sat everywhere, even in the way back!  (Before seat belt laws) Ahhhh. the freedom. And those awesome VW vans. I swear 12 peoples could sit comfortable! What to do now? I know all of you are in the same (big) boat!

Thanks!

gender prediction? a girl

due date prediction? I tend to go past & to go into labor on the full moons. According to US (ultrasound, right?) on Feb. 13th. But, the full moon will be on Feb. 7th 2012. Maybe I will be a little early this time! It will be fun to look back ladies and see for all of us!  

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Old 07-06-2011, 09:11 PM
 
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Congrats! I am prego w/ baby#4. My IUD failed! Holy Crap! Surprise! My last period was April 17th so I had an ultrasound 2weeks ago to confirm IUD gone BUT couldn't confirm a baby! Today they did follow up and we heard the heart beat. I cried so hard! Because even though this pregnancy was a shocker, I spent 2 weeks dreading a miscarriage everyday! With my previous pregnancies I never worried... This time that's all I've done! I have no prego symptoms either. Now, I am just happy and grateful that I have a gift with no morning sickness! I am due Feb.14th 2012! I am planning a water birth @ birthing center in Portland, OR. What about any of you guys? I am really going to need a baby moon with this little critter. My kidlets at home are Victoria Winter 14yrs, Jack 6yrs and Rowan 4yrs!

hugs!

Jessica

crazy! I am pregnant with #4 after my IUD failed too! I am still in shock a bit, but starting to feel more glad everyday. My due date is Feb 21.
 

 

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Old 07-07-2011, 08:16 PM
 
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I am expecting #4 as well. I am due February 7th, so almost 10 weeks! First trimester has almost flown by! 

We are planning our first homebirth. I have never used a midwife before and am very excited about using one this time. My first appointment is the 19th.

 

I dont post on this forum very often but think I should stick around :)

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Old 07-09-2011, 02:52 PM
 
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crazy! I am pregnant with #4 after my IUD failed too! I am still in shock a bit, but starting to feel more glad everyday. My due date is Feb 21.
 

 


dear mrs sauce,

So, how did you know you were pregnant? Did you have a Mirena or the copper 10year IUD? It doesn't matter now! hee hee! But it sure is interesting! It still doesn't seem real to me yet, ya know? I talk to EVERYONE about it, just so it will sink in!

jess

 

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Old 07-10-2011, 12:43 PM
 
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well, I had a paraguard 500 copper IUD that was supposed to last 5 years, but only ended up working for about a year for whatever reason. I started wondering if I was pregnant when everything started smelling disgusting! my period was late, but I was having cramps and spotting so I kept on thinking it would show up any day and at first when I started noticing the strong odors I just assumed that my house and car just smelled really bad, which is a possibility with 3 kids and a not-so-tidy husband. When I started feeling really queasy I looked at myself in the mirror and I just 'knew'. Went and saw my doctor, she did the test and I think she was more surprised than I was. Had an ultra sound to confirm and find out where the IUD was, saw the pregnancy and the IUD just sitting in my cervix. My doctor was able to remove it that day and I was really worried for a while about miscarrying but I think I am kind of past that now. I know what you mean about the whole thing not seeming real!

 

what about you? what kind of IUD were you using?

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Old 07-11-2011, 01:05 PM
 
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dear mrs sauce,

I had the para guard since last October. I had very heavy and long periods. In March it was impossible to describe heavy.(I knew something was wrong but didn't do anything about it.) When I didn't have a period in May I "knew" I was pregnant. I had a negative test and my husband thought I was crazy. On June 4th I retested with a very faint line! My midwife did an US for ectopic pregnancy- but the IUD was missing- gone! My husband laughs about it now and tells people I used my Jedi mind trick to get rid of it! I've had 3 US -one a week; according to my last period April 17th I should be farther along = they couldn't see a viable pregnancy- just a yolk sack. I was told to prepare for miscarriage. I was totally worried sick over this. I went from disbelief -hello IUD?! to wanting the baby who wasn't there! Finally we heard a heartbeat! I have now changed caregivers. NO MORE hospital hassle. I am interviewing midwives in water birth centers. I just want a calm pregnancy.

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Old 07-18-2011, 08:13 PM
 
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it's kind of crazy that there are two paraguard babies in one thread.

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Old 10-16-2011, 03:58 PM
 
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So I have a really annoying story that I totally have to share.

 

Well, let me give you some history. Like everyone here, I have 3 other children and for each of them, I've done an ultrasound to know the gender ahead of time. Yes I realize that this isn't necessary and I also realize that this is one of my quirky things that is important to me and some will disagree, and that's fine. With our first, I was SO SURE I was having a boy and when I found out I was having a girl, I was really glad to know, though I could hardly believe it!

 

With my second it was REALLY important to me to have a boy (so I would have one of each), I was like OBSESSED with it in a crazy way. So I went to find out and I was really happy to find out that it was a boy and I was all good with that.

 

With my third I really EXPECTED that it would be a girl but really just wanted a confirmation. Imagine my surprize when it was another boy! I was really distraught about it and it took some warming up to the idea, but, as always, when the baby comes it's just love love love and everythign was dandy.

 

Now with this baby, I've been having dreams that it is a girl. My sister (on the other side of the globe) has dreamt that it is a girl. I was like 100% sure it was a girl (also because we concieved on the 0+12 method) but I also realized that I love my boys and for the first time, I didn't really care if I had an ultrasound or not. I just figured it was a girl. I was so sure about it. And if it wasn't, well there is nothing I can do about it now, and that's perfectly alright, too!

 

Anyway, I was also having dreams of twins. And they were getting more and more frequent. Because my midwife kind of bailed on me, I was feeling a bit nervous about actually being pg with twins and never knowing unless I confirm via ultrasound. But I was still willing to hold out on the basis that, eventually, SOMEONE would figure out they were twins and all would be well. I was very "Zen" about the whole thing.

 

But my husband was really freaked out. He wanted things to be like like they have always been. He wanted to know gender so that we could bond and narrow down names. He also wanted to rule out twins. Ultimately, he convinced me to go on that issue alone, because in my country a home twin birth would require different arrangements, so we went.

 

When we went into the doc, she barely said two words to me. She asked what I wanted. I told her an ultrasound. She looked for about 30 seconds, said she "thought" she saw only one baby and that she "thought" it was a boy. And that was it. I asked her to please look again for either a second baby or to confirm that it was in fact a boy but she refused. My husband asked her as well and she still refused. She asked us if we wanted a referral to a more invasive ultrasound (which takes about 30 min to complete) and we said "no." We just wanted to check for twins and the gender WITH CERTAINITY. She said "well then it's one and it's a boy" and basically said goodbye. I asked her for an order for a hemoglobin/hemocrit/iron test and ONLY that and she ended up giving me an order for syphillis and toxioplasmosis and a whole host of other stuff that I didn't want. Basically, the appointment was worthless.

 

I have no idea if she was just in a bad mood or rushed or wanted to pressure us into a more invasive ultrasound or what but it is what it is and despite our assertiveness and our arguing with her she refused to turn back on the machine and look again. Worst of all, when she was looking at the gender, I actually did not see a penis and testicals and both my husband and I know how to read ultrasounds ourselves so we were sort of shocked to see that she "guessed it's a boy." It was very quick and the baby did move, so maybe we are missing a split second of somethign that SHE saw that we didn't?

 

At any rate, now we are in a quandry. We THINK there is only one baby (I only feel movement that is comiserate with only one baby, so I feel a bit more confident about that, and chances are we'd see some overlapping babies on the ultrasound, right?) but neither one of us is convinced of the gender. I really DID want a girl, but I know that I'd love a girl or boy equally and deep down, I'm totally okay with either gender, but the question is now do we try and find another doctor that is DECENT (I've been asking around and, yeah, not really finding anyone)...or hire the only decent doctor we know to do this privately (money we don't really have and kind of against our principles!) or just deal with the fact that we don't know the gender and be at peace with it?

 

I flip flop on this one. Part of me wishes I had never gone in in the first place, because I was totally fine with not knowing (but thinking that it was definately a girl) but now I"m feeling like I have to undo that negative experience and get some certainity and clarity.

 

What do you all think and what would you do?

 

 


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Old 10-17-2011, 03:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jul511riv View Post

So I have a really annoying story that I totally have to share.

 

Well, let me give you some history. Like everyone here, I have 3 other children and for each of them, I've done an ultrasound to know the gender ahead of time. Yes I realize that this isn't necessary and I also realize that this is one of my quirky things that is important to me and some will disagree, and that's fine. With our first, I was SO SURE I was having a boy and when I found out I was having a girl, I was really glad to know, though I could hardly believe it!

 

With my second it was REALLY important to me to have a boy (so I would have one of each), I was like OBSESSED with it in a crazy way. So I went to find out and I was really happy to find out that it was a boy and I was all good with that.

 

With my third I really EXPECTED that it would be a girl but really just wanted a confirmation. Imagine my surprize when it was another boy! I was really distraught about it and it took some warming up to the idea, but, as always, when the baby comes it's just love love love and everythign was dandy.

 

Now with this baby, I've been having dreams that it is a girl. My sister (on the other side of the globe) has dreamt that it is a girl. I was like 100% sure it was a girl (also because we concieved on the 0+12 method) but I also realized that I love my boys and for the first time, I didn't really care if I had an ultrasound or not. I just figured it was a girl. I was so sure about it. And if it wasn't, well there is nothing I can do about it now, and that's perfectly alright, too!

 

Anyway, I was also having dreams of twins. And they were getting more and more frequent. Because my midwife kind of bailed on me, I was feeling a bit nervous about actually being pg with twins and never knowing unless I confirm via ultrasound. But I was still willing to hold out on the basis that, eventually, SOMEONE would figure out they were twins and all would be well. I was very "Zen" about the whole thing.

 

But my husband was really freaked out. He wanted things to be like like they have always been. He wanted to know gender so that we could bond and narrow down names. He also wanted to rule out twins. Ultimately, he convinced me to go on that issue alone, because in my country a home twin birth would require different arrangements, so we went.

 

When we went into the doc, she barely said two words to me. She asked what I wanted. I told her an ultrasound. She looked for about 30 seconds, said she "thought" she saw only one baby and that she "thought" it was a boy. And that was it. I asked her to please look again for either a second baby or to confirm that it was in fact a boy but she refused. My husband asked her as well and she still refused. She asked us if we wanted a referral to a more invasive ultrasound (which takes about 30 min to complete) and we said "no." We just wanted to check for twins and the gender WITH CERTAINITY. She said "well then it's one and it's a boy" and basically said goodbye. I asked her for an order for a hemoglobin/hemocrit/iron test and ONLY that and she ended up giving me an order for syphillis and toxioplasmosis and a whole host of other stuff that I didn't want. Basically, the appointment was worthless.

 

I have no idea if she was just in a bad mood or rushed or wanted to pressure us into a more invasive ultrasound or what but it is what it is and despite our assertiveness and our arguing with her she refused to turn back on the machine and look again. Worst of all, when she was looking at the gender, I actually did not see a penis and testicals and both my husband and I know how to read ultrasounds ourselves so we were sort of shocked to see that she "guessed it's a boy." It was very quick and the baby did move, so maybe we are missing a split second of somethign that SHE saw that we didn't?

 

At any rate, now we are in a quandry. We THINK there is only one baby (I only feel movement that is comiserate with only one baby, so I feel a bit more confident about that, and chances are we'd see some overlapping babies on the ultrasound, right?) but neither one of us is convinced of the gender. I really DID want a girl, but I know that I'd love a girl or boy equally and deep down, I'm totally okay with either gender, but the question is now do we try and find another doctor that is DECENT (I've been asking around and, yeah, not really finding anyone)...or hire the only decent doctor we know to do this privately (money we don't really have and kind of against our principles!) or just deal with the fact that we don't know the gender and be at peace with it?

 

I flip flop on this one. Part of me wishes I had never gone in in the first place, because I was totally fine with not knowing (but thinking that it was definately a girl) but now I"m feeling like I have to undo that negative experience and get some certainity and clarity.

 

What do you all think and what would you do?

 

 



I sorta had the same issue with my 2nd pregnancy. My oldest has a different dad then the younger 2 1/2 have, and the ex did cheat on me. Now I know my younger kids dad 100% and he had not been with anyone before me so really no chance of sti's or anything. I usually see the ob I saw for the pregnancy with the oldest just for confirmation of pregnancy and to have her order an ultrasound to double check dates and if I'm far enough along gender. She literally in front of him though he missed her comment flat out said he could be lying to me! Plus drove me insane cause I refused to let them do a HIV test.


Melissa Wife To James & Mama to Christopher Michael- 6/03 ,Ella Cheyenne- 10/09 & Xander Ryan James- 9/10 :
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Old 11-03-2011, 05:33 PM
 
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Well, it doesn't look like we are going to have another ultrasound. I guess we are just going to have a surprize. My ds1 says he's guessing it's a girl. My dd says it's likely a boy and I'm craving MILK MILK MILK and CAKE!!! (which are all supposed to be "girl" cravings) but, whatever. I've got my boys and girls names all lined up in lists and ready to go, so my basic problem is solved. When it gets closer I'll wash the boys clothes, mainly because my unisex stuff is in there and it the doc was right, I'm good to go and if not, we'll drag out the girls box and wash them, too.

 

I seriously can't believe I am going to have 4. Suddenly the idea of a *ahem* large family seems inevitable. Like I can see us having a 5th and then beyond...it doesn't seem so crazy now. It's like having a 4th was getting us over the hurdle. But I'm still coming to terms with the fact that I could be a MOM (mom of many), I feel like it's really changing my perspective of myself. Up until now, I've been the "young mother." Now I don't feel so young and I kind of feel more experienced...too experienced...to fall into that trap.

 

On the other hand, I'm rather young. In my early 30's, which (where I come from) is an age where many people haven't even had their first. In fact, I have friends that are just having their first now...and some of my "hillbilly friends" are on  their second, but for me to be having my 4TH...well, that seems really really ripe for a bunch of steriotypes (see "hillbilly friend" reference *wink*)

 

I've been rereading the Faber Maizlish books (How To Talk So Your Children Will Listen... Liberated Parents...and so on) and am really focusing on implimenting them. I'm also trying to get the household to run much smoother. I've been really giving the older children much more responsibility for themselves and their choices and actions and so far, so good. I would like my 5 year old ds to pick up some more of the slack, but he's been reverting back into "baby" mode with some frequency, so we are working on it (ie, "Let's use your grown up MANLY voice when you ask me for more soup, instead of the whiney hard to understand voice." that sort of thing.)

 

Anyways, we'll see how it goes.

 

How are your kids rolling with the growing belly and all that that entails? What changes are you all implementing to prepare for the expanded household?

 

And more importantly (and totally unrelated), do you think it's reasonable to be able to find a babysitter who will watch all of these kids?!  :)


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