When are you planning on telling your children? - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 11:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
Frenchie2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 218
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I have a 7 year old and 3 year old.  I am only 5 weeks, but wondering when we will tell the 7 year old.  My DH travels Monday - Thursday, so I am alone with the boys all week long.  I know that my napping and overall exhaustion is annoying for my 7 year old even though he is very sweet and understanding.  I am thinking that if we tell him that there will be a new baby, it might make the slower pace for the next couple weeks a little more bearable for him.  If anything were to happen, I think that he would handle it fine. I know that I cannot wait until the 2 trimester because I will be showing way before then and he will definitely notice and question it  (when I was preggers with my youngest and he was 3.5, he looked at me at about 6 weeks and said, 'you look like you have a baby in there.') When are you planning on telling your kids? 

Frenchie2 is offline  
#2 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 12:09 PM
 
biffer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: California
Posts: 300
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

My guys are only 2.5 and LOVE babies but I think they don't really understand the whole concept of baby in belly but we will be starting a co-op preschool next month so I think it will be easier once they are in that environment to get that conversation going. So to answer your question... probably not till 2nd trimester some time.


twin boys born 11/28/08, pregnant with #3 due 3/13/12

biffer is offline  
#3 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 12:29 PM
 
Montessortof's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 76
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I already told my son, Charlie. He'll be three in August. Mostly I told him because I suck at keeping secrets and I want to talk about things with my husband without using code words.

 

Charlie is in day care, so he has seen a lot of his friends' moms have babies in their tummies and then later he's seen them with the babies after they're born. So I think he has a decent grasp on the concept for his age. It's been about a week, and he will sometimes say, "Hi Mom! Hi baby in Mom's tummy!" He also asks when it's going to come out, and I say, "Not for a long time." That seems to satisfy him, but I expect a lot more questions as he ponders it over the next 8 months.


Tess - Mom to Charlie (8/12/08)

Montessortof is offline  
#4 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 01:13 PM
 
bcblondie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: winnipeg
Posts: 3,293
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I haven't told william (2.5) yet. In nov I miscarried and he kept saying. "baby gone" and things like that. :( Best to wait for 12ish weeks.


Mom to angel baby, grew wings at 5 weeks in May '07, William, born Dec '08, and another angel who grew wings at 8w4d (lost at 11w) in Oct '10. Rachel born Feb 2012, Another angel Lost Sept '13. New bean due Nov '14!
bcblondie is offline  
#5 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 01:48 PM
 
Montessortof's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 76
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I think if I did have a miscarriage, I would just keep telling him "Not for a long time," because I'd be trying to get pregnant again right away anyway. He wouldn't know the difference.


Tess - Mom to Charlie (8/12/08)

Montessortof is offline  
#6 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 03:33 PM
 
JunebugsMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1,075
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Honestly I think we will just wait until my 6 year old notices that something is up (and hopefully that won't be until after our 8 wk U/S).  I just couldn't bear telling them about a m/c :(

JunebugsMom is offline  
#7 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 08:07 PM
 
Dandy Lion's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Salt Lake City
Posts: 661
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I told my 5 year old daughter. I've been so tired, and I feel like I needed to explain it a little to her. I'm hoping she doesn't announce it to much, and I really hope we don't experience a loss. I kinda feel like I'm jinxing this pregnancy with how many people know.


Happily married to my soul mate, and a mommy of two girls + another baby due in June!

5****10****15****20****25****30****35**stillheart.gif*40

Dandy Lion is offline  
#8 of 34 Old 07-07-2011, 08:51 PM
 
Harmony96's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Lash-tastic Texas
Posts: 3,146
Mentioned: 13 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 20 Post(s)

Haven't told DD (4-1/2) yet b/c she is a huge blabbermouth, lol.  Will probably tell her in another week or so when we start telling people IRL.


Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

Younique has new products 9/1/14! Come check it out!!
Want to get paid daily and start earning as soon as 24 hours after sign up? Join my team!
Harmony96 is online now  
#9 of 34 Old 07-08-2011, 11:35 AM
 
freelancemom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Guatemala
Posts: 86
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I've told my sons, 5 and 4. The younger one was very worried that I had been eating a baby (since it was in my tummy, how else did it get there?!), but the 5 year old is happy. He said he couldn't decide if he wanted a brother or a sister and maybe I could have two babies? I said it really wasn't up to us, so now he's settled on a little sister. They know that the baby has to spend a lot of time in my belly and we looked at some pictures so they can see how it will grow. It's a good biology lesson, lol. 

As for a m/c, I will tell them if it comes to that. I think it's important that children know about their siblings that didn't make it into the world. My parents had a stillborn baby at 7 months and it was very important for me at the time to know what was going on and to grieve and I think that helped me when I lost my babies.

freelancemom is offline  
#10 of 34 Old 07-08-2011, 12:41 PM
 
Montessortof's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 76
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by freelancemom View Post

The younger one was very worried that I had been eating a baby (since it was in my tummy, how else did it get there?!)



LOL, I love it! Very logical!


Tess - Mom to Charlie (8/12/08)

Montessortof is offline  
#11 of 34 Old 07-08-2011, 01:01 PM
 
3surfboys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: VA
Posts: 324
Mentioned: 10 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 14 Post(s)

we aren't going to tell our boys (10, 8, 4) until at least after my first prenatal visit at 8 weeks.  This is a surprise baby and while I don't think it will cause a negative reaction in the boys, it has been hard for dh and I to fully accept it as real.  Honestly, I've woken up several mornings and asked him if I was dreaming up the pregnancy.  We'd really rather not tell "the world" until early Sept, so it might be best to keep it from the boys as long as possible!

 

For some reason, I'm really dreading the inevitable question from people: "so you decided to try for a girl?"  I might need a t-shirt that says, "I have 3 boys and I want another!" 


Laura ~ Mama to three wild and wonderful boys , our rainbow baby girl on 7/2/12 and expecting #5 on 12/24/14

3surfboys is offline  
#12 of 34 Old 07-09-2011, 07:45 AM
 
freelancemom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Guatemala
Posts: 86
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by 3surfboys View Post

For some reason, I'm really dreading the inevitable question from people: "so you decided to try for a girl?"  I might need a t-shirt that says, "I have 3 boys and I want another!" 


Why do people always assume you'd want one of the opposite sex? I grew up with all sisters and everyone assumed my parents were trying for a boy (there were 5 of us). Now I have two boys and would LOVE two more and everyone says, "Oh, now you can finally get your girl!" Of course, I will be thrilled with anything, but I find it odd that people assume you must want the gender you don't have. shrug.gif

 

freelancemom is offline  
#13 of 34 Old 07-09-2011, 03:15 PM
 
mamathomas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: RI
Posts: 242
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

We told our 27-month-old DD right after we got our BFP.  We want to be open and honest with her throughout the whole pregnancy (on a level that she can understand) and for her to be involved every step of the way.  She went with me to my first appointment with my midwife yesterday and she will be coming to all of the other appointments too.   We are planning a home birth and she will be in the house with us; of course she will have the option to leave the room at any point or stay with us, totally up to her.  If we did experience a pregnancy loss, we would explain things as best as we could to her.  She is a very intuitive little lady and would know something is up; I don't want to try to hide anything from her. 

 

I also still breastfeed DD and have already noticed a change in my supply and it is becoming increasingly uncomfortable when she nurses.  Also trying to explain that as best as I can and hoping that if weaning is in our future, either on her part or mine, that by being honest with her it might help facilitate a more gentle experience for both of us.   

 

 Besides, if I'm as sick with this baby as I was with DD in my first trimester, there will definitely be no hiding anything from her!!!

 

 


“He allowed himself to be swayed by his conviction that human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them, but that life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves.” 

- Gabriel García Márquez

mamathomas is offline  
#14 of 34 Old 07-09-2011, 06:08 PM
 
Harmony96's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Lash-tastic Texas
Posts: 3,146
Mentioned: 13 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 20 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by mamathomas View Post
 Besides, if I'm as sick with this baby as I was with DD in my first trimester, there will definitely be no hiding anything from her!!!

 

 



DD was 25 months when I got pregnant with DS, and I had a little morning sickness with him, including some occasional vomiting.  DD would watch me making use of the toilet with great interest and then use the limited vocabulary she had to describe what I was doing.  "Mommy burp," she said.  lol.


Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

Younique has new products 9/1/14! Come check it out!!
Want to get paid daily and start earning as soon as 24 hours after sign up? Join my team!
Harmony96 is online now  
#15 of 34 Old 07-09-2011, 10:27 PM
 
GrowingPeaPod's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 19
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

My DS turns 7 in a little over a week. Next weekend we are having his birthday party and then next day my SIL from out of town will be here for a few days so I am thinking we will probably tell DS next Sunday morning and then to help him feel included have him either wear or shirt or some how be in on the telling of our family. His dad and step mom are expecting in Sept so he gets the concept really well and when he first found out they were pregnant thought it was time for DH and I. Lets hope he keeps that mentality.

GrowingPeaPod is offline  
#16 of 34 Old 07-10-2011, 07:53 AM
 
8inTulgeyWood's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 107
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I am planning on making a treasure hunt with my GPS unit.  We love to geocache, so they will think its just a regular cache we are looking for and not know its just for them.  Inside I will have a note and maybe some pink and blue treats.

8inTulgeyWood is offline  
#17 of 34 Old 07-10-2011, 08:10 AM
 
happyblessedmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 635
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

We won't be telling for a while since they would likely spread the news and we would like to do that ourselves. I'm thinking 3-4 months at least.


Mom of 7, ages 12, 11, 8, 6, 4, 3, and 18 months!grouphug.gif
happyblessedmama is offline  
#18 of 34 Old 07-10-2011, 05:03 PM
JMJ
 
JMJ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,301
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

We told our DD (27 months) right away.  She's so young that I don't think she really gets it.  The news of my pregnancy is public knowledge.  Of course, I'm afraid of having a miscarriage (I'm 4 weeks today), but I would rather have the support of the people around us if we did.  I don't want to lose the chance to bond with my baby and allow my daughter to bond with her sibling even if it ends up being for a short time.

JMJ is offline  
#19 of 34 Old 07-10-2011, 10:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
Frenchie2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 218
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I love hearing everyone's different reasons and plans.  We decided to tell the boys, but I don't know when.  We just saw my friend and her 9 week old this weekend and my 7 year old did not want to give up holding him and when anyone else was holding him he was cooing and making a fuss over everything that he did.  We will probably tell them next weekend since we will have a family party and I am a little nervous about someone else spilling the beans.

Frenchie2 is offline  
#20 of 34 Old 07-11-2011, 03:59 PM
 
StacieM's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 1,569
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I have no idea when we'll tell the kids.  It will be a while.  I don't even feel like telling anyone for a while.  I'm hoping to be able to wait until Sept/Oct to really tell anyone.  I'm coaching a softball season that ends in the middle of October - I will still have 5 months to go at that point and am currently hoping/planning to wait until then to say anything.  The only really reason I will say anything then is because I want to tell the head coach that I don't plan to be around for the Varsity season for the first time since 2002.  I've been on the Varsity staff since I started there and only coached JV last year for the first time.  This year, I plan to only coach the JV season.  That worries me a little because we have a new coach coming out to help.  I want her there.  She'll be great for us all, but I do worry she will "take my place" because she's got the same qualifications I had when I started.  I could just coach through the season because I've done it before, but it wasn't easy.  I'd rather just focus on baby and family this time around.

 

Anyway - getting off track, sorry. 

 

So basically don't know when we'll tell them and don't really have any super solid plans about it yet.


Stacie (34)
DH (34) ~ DDs (14, 11, 10) ~ DS (6) ~ (11/06) ~ DD (3) ~ DS (1) ~ Surpise BFP 7/2011 pos.gif

Yes, I have a blog for moms too orngbiggrin.gif

StacieM is offline  
#21 of 34 Old 07-13-2011, 08:58 PM
 
lilkat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Twin Cities, MN
Posts: 916
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by mamathomas View Post

We told our 27-month-old DD right after we got our BFP.  We want to be open and honest with her throughout the whole pregnancy (on a level that she can understand) and for her to be involved every step of the way.  She went with me to my first appointment with my midwife yesterday and she will be coming to all of the other appointments too.   We are planning a home birth and she will be in the house with us; of course she will have the option to leave the room at any point or stay with us, totally up to her.  If we did experience a pregnancy loss, we would explain things as best as we could to her.  She is a very intuitive little lady and would know something is up; I don't want to try to hide anything from her. 

 

I also still breastfeed DD and have already noticed a change in my supply and it is becoming increasingly uncomfortable when she nurses.  Also trying to explain that as best as I can and hoping that if weaning is in our future, either on her part or mine, that by being honest with her it might help facilitate a more gentle experience for both of us.   

 

 Besides, if I'm as sick with this baby as I was with DD in my first trimester, there will definitely be no hiding anything from her!!!

 

 



This sounds a lot like us! I'm working on my doula certification, too, and we talk about birth and babies a LOT around here, so Renny already knows a lot. She knows that babies grow in their mamas' wombs, and she's seen me use my Diva cup and all. We've even talked about a baby sibling, and just the other day she told me that Daddy should go find me a seed so I could grow a baby sister in my womb.  So I'm going to tell her this weekend, once I've A) officially missed a period and B) have more time to really talk to her about it. I'm going to emphasize that it's just a little seed right now, so that if I MC, I can tell her that the seed just didn't grow, and we'll try again. I'm planning a homebirth, too, so Ren will definitely be around for all my prenatals and the birth, too, if she wants.


treehugger.gif geek.gif Mama to Lauren Philippa Elethea (3) energy.gifand expecting a little Jay bird March 2012! 3rdtri.gif

 

***4***8***12***16***20***24***28*babygirl.gif*32***36***40**

lilkat is offline  
#22 of 34 Old 07-14-2011, 09:12 PM
 
cameragirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Sacramento, CA
Posts: 2,045
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
We told our almost 5 year old DD today. She had the biggest grin. smile.gif We got confirmation with a viability scan, and I showed her the pictures and just how tiny the baby is. I think she had a clue something was up, because she had been asking the past two weeks if "God decided to give me a baby soon."

Wife to DH, mama to bikenew.gif DD (7) ribboncesarean.gif, babyf.gif DS born 3/12 ribboncesarean.gif, and have had five early losses. angel1.gif
I have Stiff Person Syndrome and my other car is a candy apple red Rascal. Feel free to ask me about it. wheelchair.gif
cameragirl is offline  
#23 of 34 Old 07-15-2011, 06:22 AM
 
Harmony96's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Lash-tastic Texas
Posts: 3,146
Mentioned: 13 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 20 Post(s)

We told DD yesterday.  She came up to me and put both her hands on my tummy and said, "Wow!  That's so cool!"  Then she gave me a hug, lol.  

 

Then this morning, she ran into DH in the kitchen and said, "Did you know Mommy has a baby in her tummy today?"  :D  lol


Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

Younique has new products 9/1/14! Come check it out!!
Want to get paid daily and start earning as soon as 24 hours after sign up? Join my team!
Harmony96 is online now  
#24 of 34 Old 07-18-2011, 11:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
Frenchie2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 218
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

We told our 7 yo and 3 yo on Friday night.  My 7 yo was over the moon about it and has not been able to stop talking about it.  I want to thank you Lilkat for the seed idea.  Since I am only 6 weeks, I told my DS that sometimes the seed doesn't grow just like our veggies seeds that didn't grow in our garden and that is why we don't want a lot of people knowing.  He is so geeked and keeps looking at my belly and saying, 'I can't believe we are going to have another baby!'  My 3 yo is not as aware of what is going on and I think he will understand more when my belly starts getting bigger and we start doing more planning with getting clothes out and organizing everything for the babe.

Frenchie2 is offline  
#25 of 34 Old 07-18-2011, 01:19 PM
 
cygknit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 401
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I wasn't planning on telling mine anytime soon. At 4 and 2 they are too young to keep it quiet (or be expected to) and I want to wait until September to tell people IRL. Yesterday, we were all at Target and walking through the baby aisle (our T is newly redone and I can't find anything!) and SO asked if we needed anything for this one. My 4 yo said, "we need THIS for our baby!" I was a little surprised! We hadn't been talking about it around him, but I guess he just knows.

 

Oh, and for the morning sickness mamas, he was 15 mo old when I got pg w/his little brother. He used to accompany me into the bathroom and pretend vomit right along with me. "Look mama! {sound effect}!"


Mama to two June bugs, ages 3 and 5, and a m/c at 8wks on 8/11/11.Rainbow Girl rainbow1284.gif 7/25/12

cygknit is offline  
#26 of 34 Old 07-18-2011, 06:19 PM
 
Brisen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Eastern Ontario
Posts: 6,874
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)


 

 Quote:
Originally Posted by cygknit View Post

 

Oh, and for the morning sickness mamas, he was 15 mo old when I got pg w/his little brother. He used to accompany me into the bathroom and pretend vomit right along with me. "Look mama! {sound effect}!"

 

lol.gif

 

We wait until at least 3 months to tell anyone, including the kids.  Partly because I've miscarried before and I prefer to keep that private, but also because they're impatient enough through the last 6 months -- it's a long time to wait for a little kid!


Mom to DS(14), DS(12), DD(9), DS(6), DS (4), and DS(2)  

***4***8****13***17***21****26***heartbeat.gif****35****40

Brisen is offline  
#27 of 34 Old 07-23-2011, 12:41 PM
 
thegalawayhouse's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 8
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Dh and I have decided to wait till the kids notice my tummy getting bigger.  I say it will only be a month or so before that happens.  This will be baby #7 so I'm sure I'll start popping out sooner than later.  I'm terribly impatient tho, so waiting is driving me nuts!

thegalawayhouse is offline  
#28 of 34 Old 08-12-2011, 11:33 AM
 
Toposlonoshlep's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: happy in the world
Posts: 379
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Yes, same here, except I have 28 month old DS. DP and I told him right away and he totally gets it. He knows I have been exhausted and nauseous, and he is so caring. He keeps asking if my belly hurts, telling me things he wants to teach the baby, and before he nurses he always asks "just a little bit? Just to ten? Please?" (We count to ten on each side for shorter nursing sessions). He is very gentle. 

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mamathomas View Post

We told our 27-month-old DD right after we got our BFP.  We want to be open and honest with her throughout the whole pregnancy (on a level that she can understand) and for her to be involved every step of the way.  She went with me to my first appointment with my midwife yesterday and she will be coming to all of the other appointments too.   We are planning a home birth and she will be in the house with us; of course she will have the option to leave the room at any point or stay with us, totally up to her.  If we did experience a pregnancy loss, we would explain things as best as we could to her.  She is a very intuitive little lady and would know something is up; I don't want to try to hide anything from her. 

 

I also still breastfeed DD and have already noticed a change in my supply and it is becoming increasingly uncomfortable when she nurses.  Also trying to explain that as best as I can and hoping that if weaning is in our future, either on her part or mine, that by being honest with her it might help facilitate a more gentle experience for both of us.   

 

 Besides, if I'm as sick with this baby as I was with DD in my first trimester, there will definitely be no hiding anything from her!!!

 

 



 


buddamomimg1.pngWriter/Designer/Hip Hippie Russian Mama to Torngtongue.gif (3yo) and Kboc.gif(4mo)

 

 
 
Toposlonoshlep is offline  
#29 of 34 Old 08-13-2011, 01:58 PM
 
JunebugsMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 1,075
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Well I have a NT ultrasound at 12 weeks so I guess we will probably tell the kids (and everyone else) if everything goes ok with that. 

JunebugsMom is offline  
#30 of 34 Old 08-13-2011, 02:15 PM
 
RachaelsMommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 513
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mamathomas View Post

We told our 27-month-old DD right after we got our BFP.  We want to be open and honest with her throughout the whole pregnancy (on a level that she can understand) and for her to be involved every step of the way.  She went with me to my first appointment with my midwife yesterday and she will be coming to all of the other appointments too.   We are planning a home birth and she will be in the house with us; of course she will have the option to leave the room at any point or stay with us, totally up to her.  If we did experience a pregnancy loss, we would explain things as best as we could to her.  She is a very intuitive little lady and would know something is up; I don't want to try to hide anything from her. 

 

I also still breastfeed DD and have already noticed a change in my supply and it is becoming increasingly uncomfortable when she nurses.  Also trying to explain that as best as I can and hoping that if weaning is in our future, either on her part or mine, that by being honest with her it might help facilitate a more gentle experience for both of us.   

 

 Besides, if I'm as sick with this baby as I was with DD in my first trimester, there will definitely be no hiding anything from her!!!

 

 



 


I feel the same way. I told my kids they day after I found out. They are 4.5 and 2. I had thought about waiting, b/c I've had 3 m/c's. I decided if I waited to tell DD, then I'd wait to tell everybody, b/c I thought she should be the first to know. After some thought though, I realized there is never a "safe" time to tell them. Death is a part of life, and they have to deal with it sooner or later. I just felt like if I didn't tell her, then I m/c-ed, then she'd never know she had a brother or sister. Plus I'd be crying so she'd know something was wrong and I'd have to tell her anyway.

 


 


Erin~ Mommy to 3 curly-headed children and expecting #4 in December. ***4***8***12**16***20***24***28***32***36***40**
RachaelsMommy is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off