Looking over for me UPDATE - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 31 Old 07-25-2011, 08:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I just started bleeding tonight.  I am so sad.  If it was just blood I would be hanging on to hope, but it is thick, dark blood with clots and I checked my cervix and it is super soft, swollen and open.  I have never felt it like that, but it certainly isn't the firm, hard cervix I had a couple weeks ago.  

 

What bites is I know this baby has been growing.  In just the last couple days I got that sensation that you can feel your uterus when I lightly leaned against counters and such, and I had strong pregnancy symptoms all day.  Then tonight I felt a little gush and checked and saw blood.

 

I am upset and crying but know it hasn't even come close to really hitting me yet.  This is pregnancy number six and my first miscarriage.  I have been blessed, but boy does this hurt.  Really wishing I hadn't told so many people.  I was so excited and just felt so optimistic.  We have been car shopping, and planning the bedroom and baby shopping, and maternity shopping.  I want to scream!

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#2 of 31 Old 07-25-2011, 09:11 PM
 
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Elisa I'm so sorry. hug2.gif


twin boys born 11/28/08, pregnant with #3 due 3/13/12

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#3 of 31 Old 07-25-2011, 09:20 PM
 
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I'm so sorry. hug2.gif

Wife to DH, mama to bikenew.gif DD (7) ribboncesarean.gif, babyf.gif DS born 3/12 ribboncesarean.gif, and have had five early losses. angel1.gif
I have Stiff Person Syndrome and my other car is a candy apple red Rascal. Feel free to ask me about it. wheelchair.gif
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#4 of 31 Old 07-25-2011, 10:10 PM
 
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I am so sorry.

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#5 of 31 Old 07-25-2011, 10:58 PM
 
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So sorry grouphug.gif


treehugger.gif geek.gif Mama to Lauren Philippa Elethea (3) energy.gifand expecting a little Jay bird March 2012! 3rdtri.gif

 

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#6 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 04:50 AM
 
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I'm so sorry for you.  It hurts, I know.  Try some rescue remedy.   Hugs Hugs and more hugs.


Amy,  organically growing 5 homeschooled sweetieshomeschool.gifhomebirth.jpg5 lossesbrokenheart.gifbelly.gif due this summer!
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#7 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 04:59 AM
 
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Oh I'm so so sorry.  :(  Big gentle hugs Mama.


Mama to 4 amazing little people, another little expected 3/6/12!
Avid Unassisted Birth supporter/Mama

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#8 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 05:57 AM
 
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I soooo sorry.  Big hugs to you.

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#9 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 06:48 AM
 
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I'm so sorry.  Sending comforting, healing thoughts your way. hug2.gif


“He allowed himself to be swayed by his conviction that human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them, but that life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves.” 

- Gabriel García Márquez

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#10 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 07:45 AM
 
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Hugs, mama. So sorry.

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#11 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 07:55 AM
 
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I'm so sorry. The pregnancy and birth loss forum have been so supportive to me through my losses, and it was healing and helpful for me to read other's stories, you might want to check it out.


DS: 18 DD: 15 DD: 8  angel1.gif 11/10  angel1.gif 4/11
  adoptionheart-1.gifDD: 3  angel1.gif 8/11

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#12 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 09:17 AM
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss.


Mom to DS(14), DS(12), DD(9), DS(6), DS (4), and DS(2)  

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#13 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 09:49 AM
 
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Hugs to you. It's never easy to lose a baby, no matter how early.

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#14 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 10:24 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I was up most of the night crying and reading about miscarriage and spending time on the pregnancy and birth loss forum.  Thank you for all your support!

 

My bleeding stopped as suddenly as it started, but it was still worse than either of the other times I have bled in pregnancy, and this is the first time I passed clots.

 

It's still my cervix that has me the most concerned.  It feels so big and swollen and seems open at least on the lower end.  I thought the cervix stayed firm and hard during pregnancy, and read that an open cervix was a sure sign that miscarriage was inevitable, but I also read last night that the cervix goes from firm to swollen and soft (but closed) in early pregnancy.  This has me clinging to the slightest hope.  

 

Do any of you have any information on this?  Are any of you cervix checkers that can tell me what your experience is?  I feel like I am in denial, and just don't want to accept reality.  I feel like I am in complete disbelief to still be hanging on to hope.  On the other hand I feel it is over but know I need the confirmation to start healing and accepting it.

 

I am scheduled for an u/s tonight at six.  I will give you all an update.

 

 

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#15 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 10:36 AM
 
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So sorry, honey. grouphug.gif


jog.gif   mama to DS 7/09 and married to DH bikenew.gif

 

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#16 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 06:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just got home from the u/s.  

 

She found a heartbeat!  joy.gif  I am elated and exhausted.  She said placenta looks fine and she see's no indication on what caused the bleed.  Baby is measuring 8.5 weeks.  By my dates I will be 8 weeks tomorrow.  The heartrate was in the 130's which she said was fine but it seems a little slow.  I am just in shock.  I grieved all night and all day and this just feels so surreal.  Thanks for all the support and hugs!

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#17 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 06:40 PM
 
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Wow, what amazing news! So happy to hear it.
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#18 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 06:55 PM
 
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I am so happy for you. You don't know me, but I've read some of your posts and I'd have missed you!


Mama to two June bugs, ages 3 and 5, and a m/c at 8wks on 8/11/11.Rainbow Girl rainbow1284.gif 7/25/12

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#19 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 06:56 PM
 
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Congrats! 

 


Married to a WONDERFUL man, SAHM of Israel 9(b) , Ireland 5(g) , Iceland 4(b),  Italy 2(g), Scoltand 9 m(g), and pregnant with baby #6

 

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#20 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 07:18 PM
 
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Woot!  I'm glad everything is OK.


Mom to DS(14), DS(12), DD(9), DS(6), DS (4), and DS(2)  

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#21 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 08:42 PM
 
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Wow, what a relief. I'm so glad you and your bean are sticking around! 


twin boys born 11/28/08, pregnant with #3 due 3/13/12

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#22 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 09:00 PM
 
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Wonderful news! joy.gif So happy for you, mama!


treehugger.gif geek.gif Mama to Lauren Philippa Elethea (3) energy.gifand expecting a little Jay bird March 2012! 3rdtri.gif

 

***4***8***12***16***20***24***28*babygirl.gif*32***36***40**

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#23 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 10:19 PM
 
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That is great news!!! You must be exhausted:) I hope you are able to have a solid, peaceful sleep tonight!!

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#24 of 31 Old 07-26-2011, 11:42 PM
 
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joy.gif   Such great news!

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#25 of 31 Old 07-27-2011, 01:48 AM
 
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carrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gif


          Me & him and our beautiful fur boys Duke and Chopz
Forever missing our little ones lost
 
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#26 of 31 Old 07-27-2011, 03:51 AM
 
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Oh my that IS fabulous! Congrats momma!


Living a life like no one else, with my husband, and all our children
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#27 of 31 Old 07-27-2011, 04:14 AM
 
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This is great news, I bet you are so happy joy.gif

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#28 of 31 Old 07-27-2011, 04:57 AM
 
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YAY!!! joy.gif


“He allowed himself to be swayed by his conviction that human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them, but that life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves.” 

- Gabriel García Márquez

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#29 of 31 Old 07-27-2011, 11:09 AM
 
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aw, I am soooooooo happy for you!!!!! lol.gif


jog.gif   mama to DS 7/09 and married to DH bikenew.gif

 

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#30 of 31 Old 07-27-2011, 11:16 AM
 
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Oh my!  Such joyful news!  joy.gif  


Catherine and B stillheart.gif DS1 (6) biggrinbounce.gif DD (4) loveeyes.gif DS2 (1) drool.gif and expecting #4 shamrocksmile.gif on March 17, 2014.  
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