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Old 08-20-2011, 10:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Is this anyone else's definite last pregnancy? How do you feel about it?

 

I have serious pelvic issues related to pregnancy (I think SPD) and they've kicked in even earlier this time around. I swore that if I had hip trouble again this time around, we were done. And considering the shooting pains down my leg, the grinding in my hips, and the burning in my pelvis...yeah, we're done. Not quite at the point where I want DH to make the vasectomy appointment, but I don't ever want to get pregnant again.

 

I'm kind of conflicted about this. Like, it's the right decision as I enjoy walking, but I'm pretty young and I'm really good at this whole mom thing. I like kids, I like babies, I actually like giving birth (even though DD was a c-section after 40 hours of natural labor)! So many of my friends are just starting their families at my age, and I'll have my second and final kid (hopefully) a few weeks shy of my 28th birthday. I guess I feel too young to be "done" but my body can't handle another one of these. I'm worried about handling this one.


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Old 08-20-2011, 11:15 PM
 
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This is definitely my last, as well. My partner's not a sperm-producer, and it took us over a year to get pregnant--you can imagine the stress of it. If something hadn't happened in the next few months, we were resigned to sticking with just the one--it was just getting to be too much.

 

I'm a lot sadder about it than I thought I'd be. I mean, we knew what we were getting into, but there's still part of me insisting that no, we don't have to stop, we could totally keep going! (We really can't.) When I was younger, I always thought that I'd have a bunch of kids, and now that it's becoming reality that no, this is going to be it...I'm having a really hard time of it.

 

Also, like you, I'm fairly young--thirty--so most of my friends are just starting their families. I've already got an eight year old, and now this one, and I'm wrapping it up.  It's strange and a little isolating.

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Old 08-21-2011, 05:05 AM
 
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Well, I personally thought the last one was my last.  This one was a happy surprise.  I think after this DH is concerned for my safety (I'll be 35 when the baby is born so he's worried I'm getting too old to handle the stresses).  I'm 99.9% certain this will be our last, and it's kind of sad to be enjoying this for the last time, but I have a nice large family (and anyway I'm not writing anything in stone).


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Old 08-21-2011, 07:21 AM
 
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Yes, this is most likely our last, although DH said that about the previous one (I always wanted one more, just not quite this soon!)  But I think 5 kids is all we'll be able to handle. I'm only 32 and I like having all my pregnancies in my 20's to early 30's, and then having the next 18 years to raise them up! So I do feel settled with this being my last, but I also know that I'll always have a pang of longing about pregnancy, birth and the newborn stage!


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Old 08-21-2011, 09:53 AM
 
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We always said 6, and this is #6, so......

I'm pretty sure we're done after this one. I love being pregnant and giving birth, and I feel so blessed to have a large happy healthy family. But yeah, I am MOSTLY sure this is it. smile.gif


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Old 08-21-2011, 10:19 AM
 
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We also were done with our last but our excited to be having this one. This will be our last baby, Hubs will go get a vas. I already went through the "oh this is the last time I am doing this" etc with the last baby so I have that bitter sweetness out of my system and it just feels final and like it's a good thing that this is the last. No sadness about it. I am 29 and this is my 4th baby and I guess the only thing I regret is that I never got ot be pregnant with one of my sisters. They haven't even started having kids yet.


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Old 08-21-2011, 01:28 PM
 
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I spent the last 6 years basically assuming that dd would be our only-- so I feel like this babe is sort of a bonus!  Really, I was so conscious of her being "it" that I feel like I cherished the dickens out of every single moment and stage with her- and yet I still had a little inkling of longing.  I'm excited to be doing it again, but I really feel like I'll be able to comfortably say that this is it.  Not scheduling the V just yet, but I'm turning 35 this fall, dd is starting kindy, and I just feel like this little bird will be the icing on the cake  :) 

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Old 08-21-2011, 02:20 PM
 
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I'm a lot like the previous poster. This is likely it for us. I am not 100% satisfied with that decision yet, but I spent the past 4+ years thinking I may not get the chance to have another (I was a single Mom for 2.5 years). I have been in fear of infertility my whole life and I have now had the opportunity to conceive quickly & easily TWICE. My DH is on board with 2, but would have been okay with just my DD and no more, also. I am not set on being done, but this is our compromise. I won't say the decision is 100% yet, but financially #3 would be a bigger burden on us - requiring new cars, a bigger house, etc. AND, DD will be 5 when this one is born, so not sure we want to keep "starting over".

 

For now, I am trying to enjoy this and be thankful for one more chance at this whole thing.

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Old 08-21-2011, 03:49 PM
 
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I thought I was done after #2. But evidently not.

 

I am going to be 40, and judging from my past 2 babies won't be fertile again for at least 3 more years so yes, I think this is our last. I actually suspected that I was entering early menopause for the last year. I've had hot flashes, night sweats, and a few irregular cycles. I thought my body was beginning to close up shop for good and I was OK with that, maybe even looking forward to it a little.

 

I am not sad about this one bit. DH and I have said all along that we wanted 2, maybe 3 so things have worked out pretty well for us.


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Old 08-21-2011, 03:58 PM
 
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I thought I was pretty comfortable with three... then came dd4... and... now dc5!  Whoa!  We'll be at max capacity for our Suburban (which is our only vehicle), so we better at least hold off for a while more ;)  I do try to enjoy every time like it's the last, since you just never know!  But... we don't do anything to prevent or achieve.. things just happen!  Or at least that's how we operate.... but I think I'll take a more active role in not trying to achieve after this baby is born.

 

(unless of course this baby is a boy... there's no way we could end on a boy... everybody will just say, "Oh!  You finally got your boy!" as if that's all we were ever trying for and our four girls were just practices.... ugh...)


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Old 08-21-2011, 04:38 PM
 
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Quote:

Originally Posted by judybean View Post

(unless of course this baby is a boy... there's no way we could end on a boy... everybody will just say, "Oh!  You finally got your boy!" as if that's all we were ever trying for and our four girls were just practices.... ugh...)


Terrible, isn't it?  Like it even matters.   I hate the, "well, if this one is a girl, you'll have to have one more...."  Makes me cringe.

 

I think DH will be done at two.  I think he was sorta done with one--we have a lot of things we want to do, and I'm hoping I'll be ready to move on to other-than-baby-things once this little blueberry is school-aged.  I'm treating it like my last, because it very likely will be.  DH is willing to get a V when the time comes, so I think he will ultimately make the decision.   


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Old 08-21-2011, 07:32 PM
 
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Yes, this is our last as well. Our lifestyle is very fast-paced and hectic (work takes us on the road a lot, it's hard to keep to a normal schedule)...having one child was a major adjustment and I'm a little worried about how we'll juggle two. That said, I grew up very close to my brothers, and I see how lonely my only-child husband has been his whole life. Plus our daughter is having all sorts of interesting experiences "on the road" that I wish I'd had growing up. So we'll go for one more and make it work! (If I have twins, though I'll probably lose my mind. I'm not a "natural" mother with newborns, they stress me out to an amazing degree.)

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Old 08-21-2011, 07:36 PM
 
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Last pregnancy (again shy.gif ) here too.  We thought DD1 was the last.  Then surprise DD2 was the last.  Then surprise DS2 was the last.  So, we're on the last one again.


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Old 08-21-2011, 08:53 PM
 
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I wasn't sure I wanted 3. But I knew if we decided to have 3, that would be it. So, sometime in the next few months DH will get a vasectomy. Hopefully there's only one in there!

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Old 08-22-2011, 09:51 AM
 
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This is my last, but I'm not at all upset about it. I have been on the fence about sticking with one or having two for a while, so I'm actually kind of relieved that this is the last one and I no longer have to either convince my SO to have another one or wonder if it's what I want. I'm pregnant, so number two is coming either way!

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Old 08-22-2011, 11:03 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sallyrae17 View Post

This is my last, but I'm not at all upset about it. I have been on the fence about sticking with one or having two for a while, so I'm actually kind of relieved that this is the last one and I no longer have to either convince my SO to have another one or wonder if it's what I want. I'm pregnant, so number two is coming either way!



This feels like me, exactly  :)  It's such a relief to have the decision be MADE, finally!

 

 

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Old 08-23-2011, 11:46 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by judybean View Post

 

(unless of course this baby is a boy... there's no way we could end on a boy... everybody will just say, "Oh!  You finally got your boy!" as if that's all we were ever trying for and our four girls were just practices.... ugh...)



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by justKate View Post

Quote:


Terrible, isn't it?  Like it even matters.   I hate the, "well, if this one is a girl, you'll have to have one more...."  Makes me cringe.

 

I think DH will be done at two.  I think he was sorta done with one--we have a lot of things we want to do, and I'm hoping I'll be ready to move on to other-than-baby-things once this little blueberry is school-aged.  I'm treating it like my last, because it very likely will be.  DH is willing to get a V when the time comes, so I think he will ultimately make the decision.   



I'm done no matter what, but for these very reason that if we have a boy I kind of hope it's not a boy even though I'd actually like a boy this time. The first 3 times I honestly wanted a girl, and after DD#3 was born people said so much stuff about boys that my 3 year old decided she wanted to be a boy when she grew up and I was SOO mad at all those stupid idiots for saying things like that in front of my daughters. even now everyone says "Oh I bet youre praying for a boy" or "Chris sure is sweating hoping this one is a boy."   I'm conflicted though because I really would like a boy and I really did want girls the first 3 times, and Chris always wanted 3 girls, but now he wants a boy. urrggh, it's annoying. it doesn't really matter what babe is we'll love the crap out of it, although I am worried about the amount of attention a boy would get from my grandparents, they tend to very much show how much they prefer boys, and my girls would notice. so i guess I sort of want a girl just to protect my girls.


Courtney and Cree, baby made 3, added one more then there were 4, sakes alive, then we had 5, another in the mix now we have 6!

A Momma in love with her Little Women-Jewel Face, Jo Jo Bean, June Bug, and Sweet Coraline.

 

 

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Old 08-23-2011, 12:07 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AbbieB View Post

I thought I was done after #2. But evidently not.

 

I am going to be 40, and judging from my past 2 babies won't be fertile again for at least 3 more years so yes, I think this is our last. I actually suspected that I was entering early menopause for the last year. I've had hot flashes, night sweats, and a few irregular cycles. I thought my body was beginning to close up shop for good and I was OK with that, maybe even looking forward to it a little.

 

I am not sad about this one bit. DH and I have said all along that we wanted 2, maybe 3 so things have worked out pretty well for us.

I really felt like the last one was the last. I'll be forty on Friday. I'll be a grandmother any day now. I married off my oldest dd 14 months ago. I sent my oldest ds off to college last week. My third ds started high school last week. It's a little odd to then have a 5yos, 3yos, and 1yos at home. Oh well, what can I say? I guess I am a freak in this society. But ya know, I believe that God created women and he gave us a childbearing season. So really it is society that is freakish, not me!
 

Oh, sorry, I quoted you to say that I, too, have been experiencing a lot of perimenopausal symptoms over the last 18 months. In fact, my periods were so long spread out and erratic that the only reason I found out I was pregnant was because I did my normal, every six week pregnancy test. (I did that to keep myself from going crazy!)

 

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