not sure when to be excited... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 08-22-2011, 08:52 AM - Thread Starter
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I am here after a loss at 10 weeks in june. Not sure when I will be able to get excited really.... maybe after 10 weeks? 


Anyone been through this? Thoughts?

homescholing traveling mama of two ('08 and '12) expecting May 2015!
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#2 of 10 Old 08-22-2011, 08:59 AM
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I had two losses back to back at around 9 weeks both times. When I was finally pregnant with my son (last pregnancy), I knew right away that it was going to be fine. Trust your body and your instincts. Also, if you feel excited, that's great! Go with your emotions and don't hold back! I think that being excited and sharing news is what you should feel/be doing! Don't think or worry about the "what ifs." I know it's really hard, I've been there. But there's nothing you can do. Trust your body to take care of your little bean.


Congrats, mama!

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#3 of 10 Old 08-22-2011, 05:42 PM
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Congratulations!  My losses were all very early, so I felt much safer with my dd and this pg after seeing the heartbeat.  I was still pretty nervous last time, but this go around I just feel pretty optimistic (maybe because I feel SO sick and sore bbs all the time!)   I would say to try and let yourself enjoy it, but don't feel guilty if you don't feel all giddy and bonding until things are further along.  Whatever you feel is perfectly fine.  A loss is really hard to go through- and I can't even imagine one so late as yours.  That was still quite recent, and if you need to take some more time to mourn that- or just to trust your body again- while this babe gets on a healthy roll, that's okay.  -hugs-

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#4 of 10 Old 08-22-2011, 07:13 PM
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I had a 9 week loss earlier this year as well. I am trying really hard to just be excited and enjoy however much of this pregnancy as I get(though I obviously want a baby!). I thought about trying to keep it secret longer and all, but I just want to normalize it. (((hugs))) it is not a fun boat to be in, half expecting things to not go well.

Wendy,loving wife to Brian, happy mama of Trinity(15), Christian(15), Gavin(13), Logan(11), Griffon(9),Jubilee(7), Epiphany (4), and Lucian Danger( born 18 April 12) <3
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#5 of 10 Old 08-23-2011, 04:04 PM
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I can relate, too. I had a mc last year at 11 wks.  I feel excited now, and I'm just trying not to worry too much.  I guess I'll feel more confident after I get past the 12/13 week mark.  That's when we're planning on going public.  I have told my close friends now though. 

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#6 of 10 Old 08-23-2011, 05:11 PM
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I'm in the same boat. I just don't feel right. I m/c between my 2 boys. I'm just waiting

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#7 of 10 Old 08-23-2011, 05:25 PM
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Right there with you ladies. All 4 of my losses were between 4.5 and 6 weeks, and I'm only at 4 wks now.. I just try not to worry until I've been given a reason to worry. I know, its far easier said than done.


Carolyn, married to M, momma to K (09/'09) and C (04/'12).
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#8 of 10 Old 08-23-2011, 06:28 PM
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i'm also worried, my hubby has already spilled the beans (fortunately to close friends only) but it's my first and i have no idea what he common protocol is right now (6-8 weeks.)  It was also an unexpected pregnancy, so I had been drinking quite a bit before i realized i was pregnant.




happily married to my rock and roll cowboy guitar.gif since 2009, living the dream with our Rosebud, 26/04/12 joy.gif

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#9 of 10 Old 08-24-2011, 06:32 AM
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Me too!  I'm not officially here because my last pg in February ended in May at 14 weeks.  I don't know when I'll be comfortable being officially pregnant.  Maybe after I see a heartbeat, it'll become real real.  Besides, my hcg has been really low these past few weeks, so anything could happen. 

Married to one of the last good guys left Jim
Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then:

And THEN twins: Matt 11/14 and his guardian angel Billy 11/18/14 - 11/28/14

Ten days in our lives, a lifetime in our hearts

The whole story at:
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#10 of 10 Old 08-24-2011, 12:48 PM
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I had a miscarriage at 17 weeks 18 months ago. It took me a long time to get over it and while I hoped to get pg again soon it didn't happen until just now (and surprised us both!). One of the hardest things about the mc was dealing with other people's reactions and telling people. I won't be telling people for a long time. At some stage it is going to be obvious but as I am overweight I can hide it longer than most!! I actually have a good feeling about this pg but also don't feel like sharing with others just yet. So I understand how you feel. 


miscarriage risk is relatively low after the 1st trimester (12 or 14 wks depending on how you calculate) so i will feel safer talking about it with close friends after that. My mother lives far away but I am sure she would suspect if she was here. I literally went up a cup size between 4 and 5 weeks. To me it is so obvious! and it would be to her, too. 


My kids were devastated by the miscarriage, too. They still talk about the baby that died and ask me how old he would have been, etc so I would prefer to avoid another trauma for them, too. If I did have a mc and had to explain to them why I am upset it is different from telling them and them being excited for a long time and then disappointed. 


Sending positive thoughts,.....

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