When do/did you start to bond with your baby? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 08-26-2011, 06:06 AM - Thread Starter
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It occurred to me yesterday that I feel like I am pregnant, and I feel like I will have a baby in about 9 months, but that those two aren't really truly connected in my mind yet. As in, I don't feel like I have a growing baby inside me that I'm talking to, bonding with etc. Does that make sense?


I'm not concerned about this, but it makes me curious when others begin their bonding experience. When do you feel like there are two of you? Immediately? First heartbeat? First picture? The quickening?


I'm curious to hear your stories.

Married to my favorite man in '07. Our firstborn came along in April 2012 (HBC), and our second is on the way, due sometime in May 2014 (planning an HBAC).
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#2 of 5 Old 08-26-2011, 06:11 AM
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I think for me it's been different each time.16 I think the process this time started when we saw a beating heart on Wednesday (YAY).16 With no movement from the little one in the pictures it still felt kind of odd though.16 I think in general the "real" bonding time starts when I feel movement.

Brande: Mama of 5 and perpetual student.

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#3 of 5 Old 08-26-2011, 07:55 AM
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I agree. Feeling movement is definately a bonding time. I love it. I never complain about a wiggly baby inside keeping me awake. It is such a special thing that only I get to experience with the little one. I use that time to talk to and pray for baby, to think about the person s/he will become. Right now I am trying to love the little one and remember what a blessing s/he is. I am also trying to not complain about the adverse pregnancy symptoms because I feel like complaining leads to a lack of appreciation for this gift.

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#4 of 5 Old 08-26-2011, 08:22 AM
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For me it's when we find out the sex. Going from "it" to "she" really helped me bond with DD last time. We really need a gender neutral personal pronoun. I'm amazed that other things don't do it. I felt DD at 10 weeks (really!), saw her heartbeat at 6, but I didn't feel bonded until 20.


This time I'm feeling similar sensations already, but I'm not convinced enough to call it movement. Very specific referred gas sensations? 8.5 weeks is just stupidly early. But I bought a doppler, and I'm going to try to see if heartbeat lines up with where I'm feeling these odd sensations. If so, dude, I'm feeling movement before 9 weeks!


(Yes, I know THEY say it's impossible since the baby is so small, but I feel myself ovulate, I can feel my blood flowing through my veins, we all feel gas. Why wouldn't we feel an inch-long creature bouncing around in there?)

Ashley, Pagan treehugger.gif mama to E (6/09) and my beautiful hbac.gif baby T (4/3/12)
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#5 of 5 Old 08-26-2011, 09:29 AM
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This pregnancy and my last, I was bonding before conception.  I practice conscious conception and could feel my baby with me before conception even took place.  With my DD's I think I started bonding when I could listen to their heartbeat with a doppler around 9/10 weeks.  For me, quickening deepens the bonding....sooooo looking forward to that :)

Tanya treehugger.gif DH-Brian, DD Adri (8), DD Izzy (7), DS Ollie angel.gif (1/5/11 @ 17 weeks) and our rainbow1284.gif baby due April 12th, 2012.

Of all the lessons I did not learn as a child, or even as an adult; I learn through being, mother to my children. Through love and through pain, we are delivered and blessed!

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