dealing with the old questions... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 10-22-2013, 07:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I was all set to have my reasonably thought out 3rd c/s, which would also allow me to handle a pregnancy after recently having been given a much better position at work.

 

But...

 

Now I'm back to wondering if there just might be a chance of a natural vaginal birth for me. I was pretty sad to have missed the opportunity the other two times. I never thought I'd have a c/s with the first and didn't even prepare for the possibility of any problems arising during labor. After three shifts of midwives, I final ended up with a c/s. With the second, I was all set for a VBAC with a doula and plan, and I never went into labor. I walked into the hospital at 42 weeks, on the last day before being dropped by my midwife group, and had a c/s. It turns out I had a window on my uterus from the first c/s which could have created a tragic situation. This eased my disappointment about the second c/s a bit. It seems now that the risk of a vaginal birth is likely higher than that of a c/s for me, but I'm back to reading all the "trust your body" stuff and now I'm wondering if I shouldn't try for a VBAC after to c/s. 

 

The thing is it poses a few logistical problems:

 

1. I was just promoted at work and am planning to return to work asap for just two days a week (while pumping) and dh will stay with the baby. I just have to do the two days for seven weeks and then I'll be off for three months. This will keep work happy. I hope.

 

2. I would need to get new providers and go to a hospital much further from my home that has an anesthesiologist on 24 hours. This presents the problem I had originally... I think I went to early b/c I was worried about the distance. Also, I already have two kids and this would cause logistical problems there.

 

Thoughts?

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#2 of 3 Old 10-24-2013, 03:39 PM
 
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I wouldn't want to tell you what you "should" do. But since you asked, IMO....

"Trust your body" has lots of meanings. One interpretation of what your body has told you so far: after a long long labor, with (hopefully) good CNMs, your body and your baby needed a c/s. and that your scar is very vulnerable, and your body told you a 2nd time you needed a c/s. I have to admit, I'm not a "birth works" kind of person because honestly, evolution leaves in its wake a lot of dead mothers and babies if we don't intervene. Not to use scare tactics- but just to say that birth works for us as a species but no promises for any one individual. I do TOTALLY believe you should avoid any interventions that are not needed, and be a very involved decision-maker in that process, when interventions are needed. So, conclusion is, if I were in your shoes I would have a c/s. you will and should mourn what you have lost, that vaginal birth experience, and that is a very very serious/ important loss.

Just one perspective.
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#3 of 3 Old 10-24-2013, 07:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks Ratchet!

 

I do often joke that I am hormonally challenged. It took me a year to get pregnant with my first; the second came quickly, and then it took about five years of trying to get pregnant with this one. It also seems strange that I never went into labor with the second. I had the c/s at 42 weeks and he was almost 11 pounds... so I'm pretty sure the date wasn't worn for anything. 

 

I suppose the c/s is likely the least risky at this point. I think you are correct though. I have to allow myself to feel the loss of that experience. I guess I just never saw myself as the c/s mom, but indeed it's better than a tragic ending. 

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