Mothering Forum banner

Forcible Retraction Today -- What to Do?

2K views 4 replies 4 participants last post by  Yaliina 
#1 ·
I am really upset. Just took my intact son to an urgent care clinic (ZoomCare) because he doesn't currently have insurance. I applied through the state in June, and we are still waiting. It's really upsetting to not be able to go to our regular, trusted pediatrician!

He had some pain in his penis to the point that he was crying. I thought maybe he had a UTI. The doctor (a PA) took a urine sample and then did a visual exam.

My son (age 9) is extremely upset about having anyone look at his private area, so he was refusing to take down his pants for about 15 minutes, so I got distracted trying to get him to cooperate. I had meant to ask her if he could retract it himself so he would pull it back as far as it would go naturally (so far it only retracts so the very tip will show, but that's it), but I got focused on getting him to cooperate and forgot. She pulled the skin back under a paper sheet, so I didn't see how far, but he started crying. I figured it was because he had some infection/irritation. (This has been an ongoing problem since he doesn't always wash the area in the bath like he should.) However, on the way home, he said, "She pulled it back SO FAR and it HURT!" and has been crying since he got home. I had no idea this had happened! I feel so awful! Now he's saying it hurts worse than it did before we went to the doctor!

During the visit, she said it was unusual that it didn't retract yet, and I asked her at what age it should retract, and she said she didn't really know! I'd read about this earlier, but didn't remember the age. I just remembered it was something I shouldn't really worry about as long as things aren't infected or otherwise a problem.

So what should I do? Is he permanently damaged? I am so upset! Can I do anything to help him heal and prevent infection? I feel so horrible!
 
See less See more
#3 ·
Sorry sorry that the doctor was so uninformed - sadly very common in North America. I don't think they are taught much in medical school about intact male genitalia and many still rely on all the old myths and misconceptions that have been floating around for decades.

I hope your DS is feeling better. Application of Bacatracin to the tip of his foreskin should help it heal. It is better than Neosporin on the genitals from what I understand.

There is no reason to believe that your son should be retractable at age 9. A study in Denmark - an intact nation who do not mess with boys foreskins - found that the average age of retractability was 10 1/2. Most are retractable by the end of puberty, but it is nothing to be concerned about until about age 18, and then only if it is causing issues. There are some men who live their whole life content with a foreskin that is not fully retractable.

You might find the following website interesting: www.cirp.org/library/normal/
 
#4 ·
He shouldn't be permanently damaged unless you see some obvious damage. Just don't ever let them cut it and now he basically can't get phimosis so they never should.

Hydrogen peroxide is what I put on my cuts. Or rubbing alcohol. The former will hurt a lot less bad though
 
#5 ·
My son accidentally forcibly separated his foreskin when he was ... maybe 7 years old. He thought it was funny to pinch the foreskin and see it balloon as he peed- gross, but what can I say- boys will be boys, I guess. I found out when he started crying in the bathroom & I came to check. He told me what had happened, and showed me that his foreskin could retract a lot farther than before, but it was all red & irritated. We washed it well, put some numbing antibacterial ointment on it, and did this every day for a few days (switching to not-numbing after a day or 2). Eventually it healed back, and I'm pretty sure it at least partly re-attached, or maybe he was just frightened to retract it again, because he said it stopped going back as far. No permanent damage. I see this was a kinda old post, so I hope your DS's issue is all healed by now.
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top