I could desperately use your thoughts and insight on an issue we are facing right now...
My two year old is toilet trained, has been for about 4 months or so... self led toilet trained. Both in our home and also while we are out on errands and such, during waking hours. I should add she's gluten sensitive, to the degree of having behavioral outbursts. Also, her body physically reacts to gluten from an elimination standpoint.
Anyway, for a few months now she's been sleeping in undies at night, per her own wishes... but each night at about 2-4am she wakes wet in her bed/ bedroom, needing a change of clothes and then comes to sleep in our bedroom. She was sleeping in our bed after her nightly changes but we are expecting a new baby this December so we've urged her to just sleep in our room on her own mattress should she need to join us at night.
She rooms with her big sister (age 4). Her bedroom is lightly lit (not dark), she can get from her bed to the lightly lit bathroom on her own, the toilet it accessible to her, she can remove her undies/ PJ's and pee on her own but she's just not waking to do so... or something.
During the days, when she passes out on the couch or something, she'll sometimes wake and fuss/ seem startled. Then she launches into a mini fit where she pees herself which makes the fit even worse and longer lasting. I don't shame her or make a big deal about pee accidents but I am beginning to wonder if something else isn't going on here that I can help her with.
When we've tried upping her magnesium intake (and also on occasions where gluten has snuck in her diet somehow) she does have uncontrollable daytime accidents that also send her into a tizzy. She's very hard on herself :( and I worry that the nighttime accidents are impacting her self image.
Like I said, she's got a history of food sensitivities and gut health issues and I know bed wetting can be linked to this (not sure what else we could possible need to remove as we just finished a year long elimination diet adventure to pinpoint the gluten thing) but I know it can also be a number of other things like the new baby that is on the way or her very young age, etc.
Has anyone dealt with something similar and found a solution that worked? What can I try before we launch another lengthy and exhausting food elimination ordeal?
For the daytime sleep, is it possible to get her to the toilet as soon as she wakes up? So she can wee before she freaks out and an accident happens.
Mother of two spectacular girls, born mid-2010 and late 2012
If she wakes from a nap and hasn't peed already I can walk her to the potty and avoid the accident. The problem seems to be she's waking with the pee sensation just before she can't control her bladder anymore... which results in the accident that in turn sends her over the edge :(
I could care less if she's in diapers or not but she's got strong ideas about things and she was refusing diapers at night which began the trying for nighttime dryness thing. Remind me, their physiological development at age 2 or 2 1/2 may not support nighttime bladder control correct?
Hubby also thinks we should have her back in a cloth diaper at night. We are going to try it out tonight but my gut is telling me it is something more that we are missing here :( I really hope it is not.
Could you (or do you already) lift/walk her to the potty just before you go to bed? My daughter trained at about 2.5 and as soon as she was day trained wouldn't pee in a diaper at night (even though she had one on). She would rarely wet the bed, but would wake several times to use the potty (and I would have to wake to help her!). I started to lift her onto the potty for a pee before I went to bed (about 3 hrs after she had gone to sleep) and this got her into the habit to go through the rest of the night. If your daughter is not ready for a pee at this time, maybe you could set an alarm for 2ish and lift her then, hopefully getting her before she wets. Annoying, I know, but if you get her used to getting up at this time, maybe she will begin waking herself in time. I've only just stopped lifting my daughter for a pee before I go to bed (she's 4 now) and she has transitioned easily into just waking herself and using the potty whenever she needs it.
Do you tapper her liquids in the evening?
Does she get a night pee right before bed?
I used to take DS to the pot just before I went to bed each night. We coslept and had a little potty on a mat in our bedroom. I would take him to that then put him back in bed, then clean the pot out before I got in bed. He eventually started getting up on his own. There are a couple of things that helped us though... We were (are) in the same room as each other, so if I heard him stirring I could ask him if he needed to pee and gently guide him (half asleep) to the pot. DS would be inconsolable when he did wet the bed (like your LO, it sounds like). We started putting him in cotton training pants at night under his pjs. I talked with him during the day about waking up when he felt himself first get wet or even when he starts to pee, but just kind of vague non-conversation about how our bodies can do all kinds of neat things, like sometimes tell our sleeping self that it has to pee, or that it just did and now we have to get up and get new pjs. I also told him about wetting the bed when I was a kid, and that it isn't something that will happen forever. All of this seemed to help. The cotton pull-ups would hold enough moisture close to his body that he would wake up before soaking the bed (most nights). Actually, we usually made it to the pot, but when we didn't between the pull-ups, and the talks we had we were able to cope with it a lot better I think. And it took a little bit but he never went back to diapers at night. Good luck mama!