So stressed, and words of kindness would be great. - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 07-31-2014, 06:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So stressed, and words of kindness would be great.

So I am currently 33 weeks and working a part time job at Subway. Today has been a very stressful day ladys and I felt like I really need to vent a bit. I am in over my head in worries and things I am probably over reacting about. My fiance and I are in our own apartment and pay every utility. And what has been stressing me out is it is coming to light that I may not even get a maternity leave due to our financial situation. He works 35 hours a week and I was working 25 to 30 but recently got my hours cut hard core to 15. Rent is due tomorrow and we
Will barely be able to pay it. Afterwards we will have about 30 dollars to our name. I've been crying a lot lately due to this stress and always told myself we will be prepared for her to come. And now she is right around the corner and we have nothing still. Just a vent like I said. I've been so use to living from paycheck to paycheck because it was just me and my fiance. And now pay check to paycheck scares me. It's like no matter how hard we work, we won't ever catch a glimpse of hope that we will be able to give our daughter the things she needs... well I am done venting. Thank you for reading, any kind words of motivation would be appreciated.
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#2 of 5 Old 07-31-2014, 06:34 PM
 
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#3 of 5 Old 08-01-2014, 09:04 AM
 
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I'm so sorry you're going through that...I know how hard it is to be financially strapped and expecting, how stressful and emotional it is. Things that helped me when we were in that spot: prayer, taking it day by day, being thankful for the things we did have. And if you qualify for WIC - it can help with basic groceries and even a breast pump after delivery. Take a deep breath! It will work out.
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#4 of 5 Old 08-02-2014, 03:52 AM
 
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Yeah, I definitely feel overwhelmed by the idea of not enough money and too much work, or sometimes not enough work. I usually don't let it bother me but this week I got a little teary at one point. I usually choose to make a conscious decision to ignore the thoughts because I know we will be ok, but I also often think that I should be doing more to provide for us. I used to have four jobs and I've been slowly cutting back to one this summer but now I think I will have to pick up another again after the baby comes. I will get maternity leave but I can't afford not to work during that time.

Though I've never utilized the services, my friend is really good at finding support in the community...free food, baby supplies and classes, and anything else they seem to need. She sort of made it her job at one point to find this stuff.

The only suggestions I can make are to get another job (try care.com and craigslist), try to get things free (try Front Porch Forum and Freecycle), or downsize your life (cable, movie rentals, car use). I resorted to taking the bus this summer...not that pleasant, but much cheaper. You could also take advantage of some of the free meals in your community, usually at local churches.

Ugh! And there's family sometimes who can help. Good Luck. I think it will only get harder from here with children.
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#5 of 5 Old 08-02-2014, 06:07 AM
 
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Every time I get stressed about something, I write down what I can do about it... This has seemed to help most of the time. Instead of focussing on the stress-inducer, I now focus on how-to-get-out-of-stress and writing it down and doing even something small from my list seems to help a lot and that new energy helps me do more from the list.

Can you ask nearby churches / food ministries for help? Apply for WIC? Foodbank?

Other than WIC, are there any other financial aid you can apply for?

Write down all the expenses in a month and see where you can cut it down. Strip the budget to bare essentials. Can you do rice and beans. Eggs for protein instead of meat? Read up the posts on the financial forum on mothering.. There are some amazing ideas out there.

nerdy mom to DD1 7yo, D2 infant
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