Weekly chat 7/15-7/21 - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-15-2014, 08:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Weekly chat 7/15-7/21

Hi everyone! I just noticed we needed a new weekly chat. So here it is. How was everyone's Tuesday? Mine was kind of boring - just work, at which I complained about a whole bunch of things, hopefully not annoying too many people.

I'm still tired all the time, and although my morning sickness is gone, I still feel kind of not quite right in the evenings. Right around dinner time, which makes it difficult for me to decide on what to make, since nothing sounds good.
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Old 07-15-2014, 10:47 PM
 
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Oh that is too bad. I get tired too a lot. Tonight my husband and I made wedge salads. Veggie ones. They were really good. I put goat cheese in it. I made myself more salad then realized I was full! Haha. My husband was so helpful making it even though he started not feeling well. He thought he might throw up at one point. I worked today. Now I am hanging out with my puppies and watching A Haunting. It is pretty scary. My husband is sleeping. He can't handle the heat! Actually yeah it has been really hot. I was telling him I am glad I am not further along in this heat. I don't know how I managed it last year.

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Old 07-15-2014, 10:49 PM
 
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Well this week has been a bit slow for me. I've just been laying around and haven't really been able to do anything. I've been having constant headaches and I've been trying to avoid taking tylenol. It doesn't seem to help much anyway. I'm hoping these ease up soon. I hope everyone else is having a smooth week!

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Old 07-15-2014, 11:15 PM
 
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Hi everyone! I'm so glad that I'm able to log in again and access the group! I felt so guilty that I was one of the original mamas in here, a co-leader, and couldn't even get in! So I'm back, and hopefully things go smoothly now and I can get to know you all!

Today was a stressful Tuesday for me. Wednesday is busy this week! We have LLL in the morning, then home for lunch, my older two kids have judo class, then I have my midwife appt. Whew! I'm hoping the kids are in decent moods and can cooperate and get along.
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Old 07-16-2014, 12:01 AM
 
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I think I'm having some heartburn that can't decide if really wants to be heartburn or not. Either way, it is annoying. The headaches and tiredness are going on here too. I think part of it is my allergies, since I haven't been able to continue my allergy shots. That and I think today has been a fibro flare day. Ugh. Fibro sucks.


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Old 07-16-2014, 11:35 AM
 
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Ajoye, I'm not 100% either. But mostly, I feel at a reasonable level of functioning. I have usually held on to light nausea and headaches throughout my pregnancies, but this one is different. Rough at the beginning, but tapering off. But I still have moments of nausea, lightheadedness and malaise, like this afternoon. Just standing up watching the boys in the yard was too strenuous, lol. I needed to sit down with my feet up like ten minutes after going outside. But yesterday, I was busy busy and walked 3 miles.


Liladancing, Agreed! I am freaking hot, too. Hotter than anyone else in the house, like sweat beading and running down my body while dh tells me it really isn't that bad. WHAT?? He told me last night I turned the a/c on so high it was like arctic winter. Hahahaha.


Amraw and Green, Sorry you aren't feeling great this week. Hugs sent to you!


Lmevans, glad you came back to the ddc. I was wondering what happened to you. Also, Rosiewik and some of the others...teachermama...that were around early on.


AFM: I am unambiguously constipated and it's frustrating. I am doing a lot of things right, but not everything. I'm drinking hot lemon or ACV water each morning, taking stool softeners daily, taking magnesium, eating greens daily and a small amount of fruit. I am probably eating too much protein though and not enough fat... and cheese. Too much cheese to help me out. But I've been reading a book called Grain Brain that is fantastic and has motivated me and more importantly DH to clean up our diets once more. I try to do this all the time but he is rarely as supportive as necessary and ends up always suggesting pizza or pasta when we don't have a meal planned out.
He even threw away the tortilla chips and popcorn we had stashed. Cheating on grains and sugar had started to become normal for a bit so I am feeling supercharged and optimistic about our diet and habits right now. Feels so so good.

Wife to my Sweetness and Light, DH (03), WAHM to DS('01), DS('11), and DS('13). Encouraging mothers everywhere to write for their lives. Expecting our fourth and final baby( It's a GIRL!!!) in January 2015.
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Old 07-16-2014, 11:53 AM
 
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I think I'm having some heartburn that can't decide if really wants to be heartburn or not.
I'm just starting that heartburn but not feeling. Right at bedtime. Yuck.

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AFM: I am unambiguously constipated and it's frustrating. I am doing a lot of things right, but not everything. I'm drinking hot lemon or ACV water each morning, taking stool softeners daily, taking magnesium, eating greens daily and a small amount of fruit. I am probably eating too much protein though and not enough fat... and cheese. Too much cheese to help me out. But I've been reading a book called Grain Brain that is fantastic and has motivated me and more importantly DH to clean up our diets once more. I try to do this all the time but he is rarely as supportive as necessary and ends up always suggesting pizza or pasta when we don't have a meal planned out.
He even threw away the tortilla chips and popcorn we had stashed. Cheating on grains and sugar had started to become normal for a bit so I am feeling supercharged and optimistic about our diet and habits right now. Feels so so good.
We've been working on the diet clean up on & off for over a year now. I'm so grateful that we started when we did. But we still fall off the wagon when things get too busy like they are now. I'm not constipated yet, but things are definitely way slower. When I actually get stuck LOL I'll have a cup of coffee. Dried apricots & kalamata olives can also help.

AFM: I definitely need to drink more water. And remember to take my vitamins. And my depression meds. The only thing I'm remembering to take always right now is my calcium - cuz it's a sweet chewy vitamin. I couldn't stomach the thought of taking any more pills.

I'm still exhausted, especially at the end of the workday. Still nauseous if I don't eat frequently enough. Still have a tendency to vehemently decide I don't like whatever I'm eating half way through it. I seem to mostly like spicy or very plain foods. BUT! There's good news. I got my genetic test results back (I'm old so insurance covers it), everything is good & WE'RE HAVING A GIRL!!! So very excited!

Loving mama to Aden (8/5/2010) and DSD (15).
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Old 07-16-2014, 01:31 PM
 
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I got my genetic test results back (I'm old so insurance covers it), everything is good & WE'RE HAVING A GIRL!!! So very excited!
Congrats! Glad everything is looking good. I'm hoping for a girl too.

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Old 07-16-2014, 04:34 PM
 
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What does LLL and AFM mean?

I get heart burn too. Just take tums or also been experimenting with liquid calcium. My doc doesn't think it is effective. But she also said it wasn't bad for me.

I really think I am having a boy. I had another dream about it last night. It was a really long dream but these are the highlights. I was in Oregon and gave birth. Somehow my husband slept through the whole thing. But my mom was there. They weighed my baby boy and he was over 10 pounds! He had cute red hair. My husband showed up at some point and we were talking about names. It was sort of a strange hospital environment actually. They put me in these weird teetering metal device and I was trying to balance and try breast feeding for the first time as well. Difficult! And my mother in law had to make fun of my nipples saying hers were superior. Haha. Shortly after we were leaving and I was breast feeding while walking. All weirdness aside it was a very happy and pleasant dream I keep thinking of. When I woke up I told my husband. And I also told him I would kill him if he slept through the birth. I doubt highly that would happen though.

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Old 07-16-2014, 08:14 PM
 
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Well I'm glad I'm not alone with all this tiredness. It's kinda funny because I feel extremely tired, and motivated at the same time. Lol. I thought to my self I'm going to clean the living room, and vacuum too...I never made it to the vacuum. I'm glad DH is happy to help out around here, but I know he is getting tired too. That's just one more reason I'm happy that I have not been feeling sick anymore. For a while I couldn't even send a text without feeling motion sick. And I am so very thankful to be getting an appetite back. I pretty much felt like I had a hangover the whole time I was pregnant with DD. So far it's looking like this pregnancy is going to be a little more kind to me.

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Old 07-16-2014, 08:21 PM
 
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Feeling pretty good this week, other than a few headaches, which started last week. It was suggested I try an amber necklace along with the EO I've been using to get some relief.
I had my first appointment with my home birth midwife. It went really well and I'm excited about going through this pregnancy with her, in a much more natural way than my previous pregnancies/births.
I also was able to start running again after some spotting early on...took a 2.5 mole run tonight in our cool Ohio weather.
Hope you all are having a great day/week
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Old 07-16-2014, 10:27 PM
 
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Although I wish we were all feeling better and more energetic, it makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one so fatigued! My nausea has let up, but I still feel sooo tired and cranky most of the time. I was starting to feel just...lazy. I have to remind myself it's okay not to get everything done, my body is working hard growing a baby!

Neonalee, congrats on the news you're having a girl! So exciting!!

Liladancing, that is such an interesting dream! It does sound comforting/positive. Hopefully your husband doesn't sleep through the birth, though that seems highly unlikely Also -- I believe LLL stands for La Leche League, the breastfeeding group. I'm not sure what AFM stands for?

How do people add the little baby timelines at the end of their posts? They're so cute.
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Old 07-17-2014, 11:01 AM
 
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Well I guess the second trimester doesn't want to be so kind to me. I woke up this morning in severe pain on my left side that would not let up. I couldn't move at all and was afraid I was losing the baby. I managed to make it to the bathroom to check for blood but there wasn't any. The pain lasted for about two hours and then suddenly just disappeared. It didn't ease up, just gone. I was reassured that it was just round ligament pain but I couldn't believe that it would be so painful. Has anyone else experienced this before?

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Old 07-17-2014, 11:25 AM
 
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What does LLL and AFM mean?

I get heart burn too. Just take tums or also been experimenting with liquid calcium. My doc doesn't think it is effective. But she also said it wasn't bad for me.
AFM = as for me
When I had heartburn with my son I took a papaya extract chewable tablet. I think it had peppermint too maybe? You can take as many of those as you want. I was taking the calcium based ones but I read something about using caution with how many you take so I switched to the papaya. I honestly can't remember why to use caution though.

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Well I guess the second trimester doesn't want to be so kind to me. I woke up this morning in severe pain on my left side that would not let up. I couldn't move at all and was afraid I was losing the baby. I managed to make it to the bathroom to check for blood but there wasn't any. The pain lasted for about two hours and then suddenly just disappeared. It didn't ease up, just gone. I was reassured that it was just round ligament pain but I couldn't believe that it would be so painful. Has anyone else experienced this before?
I haven't had that kind of excruciating pain, I'm so glad it wasn't something major. How scary! With DS I didn't have the ligament pain, but this time I am. Not fun. I really need to start some kind of daily movement. I think that will help. Yoga, bellydance, even walking. Anything. But it's 100 degrees here every day or higher and I haven't had the energy for anything other than possibly walking. Last night I was reading about fit2be.us and that sounds like something I/we should do.

Loving mama to Aden (8/5/2010) and DSD (15).
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:56 PM
 
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I haven't had that kind of excruciating pain, I'm so glad it wasn't something major. How scary! With DS I didn't have the ligament pain, but this time I am. Not fun. I really need to start some kind of daily movement. I think that will help. Yoga, bellydance, even walking. Anything. But it's 100 degrees here every day or higher and I haven't had the energy for anything other than possibly walking. Last night I was reading about fit2be.us and that sounds like something I/we should do.
I'm right there with you. It's pretty hot here too so I'm having a hard time finding the energy to do anything. I checked out the fit2be.us and it definitely sounds like something I want to try. I love that they have exercises designed for pregnant women and I definitely need to get some activity in. I hope that helps with the pain.

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Old 07-17-2014, 03:47 PM
 
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How do people add the little baby timelines at the end of their posts? They're so cute.
You just custom make your own then put the right code on your profile. In your signature. It is lilypie.com

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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Old 07-18-2014, 07:41 AM
 
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Amraw, I have had some wicked RLP. I know that was scary but it is harmless besides sucking up loads of time. As things keep progressing, we all just learn to move WAY more carefully. HUG!

Well I am trying my best to eliminate grains and sugar and limit fruit. So far, the past few days have been great and I feel good. BUT we are driving down to CT to visit the in-laws and there will be an amazing pie and italian cookies and all sorts of bad goodies. Ugh. I KNOW DH is going to eat them because he cannot resist and it was all purchased for us and our visit. I want to hold out, but also if we don't eat it, no one will. It will be thrown out. To me, if I just had it at my house, I'd throw it away knowing full well that I don't want to put it in my body, but I feel bad in my in-law's house. AND I've got to be honest, it is the best italian pie in the world. I don't know if I am strong enough. Over the weekend, I would usually eat like three pieces because it is sooooo good. This will be hard.

Wife to my Sweetness and Light, DH (03), WAHM to DS('01), DS('11), and DS('13). Encouraging mothers everywhere to write for their lives. Expecting our fourth and final baby( It's a GIRL!!!) in January 2015.
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Old 07-18-2014, 01:17 PM
 
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Well I am trying my best to eliminate grains and sugar and limit fruit. So far, the past few days have been great and I feel good. BUT we are driving down to CT to visit the in-laws and there will be an amazing pie and italian cookies and all sorts of bad goodies. Ugh. I KNOW DH is going to eat them because he cannot resist and it was all purchased for us and our visit. I want to hold out, but also if we don't eat it, no one will. It will be thrown out. To me, if I just had it at my house, I'd throw it away knowing full well that I don't want to put it in my body, but I feel bad in my in-law's house. AND I've got to be honest, it is the best italian pie in the world. I don't know if I am strong enough. Over the weekend, I would usually eat like three pieces because it is sooooo good. This will be hard.
Just curious - why limiting fruit? I haven't been eating as well as I should, though I managed to avoid 2 donuts this morning. I count that as success.

Also - as a lifetime weight watchers member, I would suggest not to refuse/hold out. If it's the best & especially something you don't get often, have a small piece & plan for it by eating especially healthy the rest of the day. Decide in advance how much of X you are going to ENJOY and balance out the rest of your eating.

Loving mama to Aden (8/5/2010) and DSD (15).
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Old 07-18-2014, 10:51 PM
 
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Thanks writermama12, it was pretty scary but I'm glad it's normal.

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Old 07-19-2014, 02:39 PM
 
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Hi ladies! I haven't posted since the return to the forums. It's so much easier to post in this format!

Like many of you, my nausea has dissipated for the most part, but I am still tired much of the time. I'd like to think that I'm getting some energy back, but I can't really tell yet, lol. RLP has been pretty bad on and off. It's the worst when I go from a seated position to standing after I rock my 2.5 year old to sleep and then it usually is pretty horrible when bend down to lay her down in her crib… I can only imagine how much harder that is going to become as I get bigger. My older daughter never needed to be rocked to sleep as a toddler, so at this age she would just climb in her crib and give me a kiss goodnight and that was that, pretty much.

Writermama12, what on earth is Italian pie?! Even though I don't know what it is, I totally want some, haha. Now that my appetite is returning, I've become somewhat of a bottomless pit. It's really dangerous, especially when my mother brings me her home made lasagna and insalata caprese!

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Old 07-20-2014, 04:08 AM
 
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hi everyone! i'm at 14 weeks, 1 day now... just got back from a week away at a cottage with my hubby and kids. it was a nice time away, but i came back exhausted!!

i *think* the morning sickness is mostly over now, but it's hard to tell because i was taking diclectin at the beginning of last week... it knocks me out and makes me feel like a zombie the rest of the time, so i've been off of it for the last 4ish days now. so happy that i managed to not barf at all during my week away. waiting to see if it's over now or not. i'll still take it if the m/s is bad, but i'd rather be AWAKE this summer with my kids!!

there have been a few random times when i think i maybe might have felt the baby kick, but i'm not altogether convinced yet. but maybe. i'm hoping it becomes a little more regular, i love the kicking part!!!

oh, and very exciting news.. my cousin has decided that she is going to breastfeed this babykins, so she has started in on the protocol to induce lactation... she will be on hormones/meds from now until six weeks before the birth.. then she will start pumping like crazy. hopefully she will build up a good supply!!! i am just so proud of her for doing this.. it's quite an under taking... and since i get to enjoy the pregnancy part, i am just thrilled that she will get to enjoy the nursing part... such a special bond!! i will pump for a short time after the birth, give her my colostrum and a bit of milk, but after that i will only pump for comfort and let my supply slowly go away (she lives 9 hours away, it would be too complicated to pump/donate to her full time, and at that point, i'll probably just want my body back).

Momma to K ('01), E ('03) and A ('07)
Acting as a Gestational Surrogate for my cousin, EDD Jan 17th
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Old 07-20-2014, 11:10 AM
 
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@shelley4 , good for your cousin! lucky babykins has two amazing mothers.

awhile back you said you were open to questions, so I'm going to feel empowered to ask (but won't be offended if at any point you let me know IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS )...my most burning curiosity is how you are framing this within the family context...what are you telling your kids, what will you tell babykins, what about aunts & uncles and grandparents? Obviously, you're not being secretive, and it's early yet, but there must be some interesting subtleties you and your cousin have discussed.

I have a huge extended family, with a few shady spots in our collective history having to with paternity/maternity questions...things my close cousins and I have surmised about from time to time but never gotten a real handle on, so I suppose that's where my fascination originates.
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Old 07-20-2014, 11:44 AM
 
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@shelley4 , good for your cousin! lucky babykins has two amazing mothers.

awhile back you said you were open to questions, so I'm going to feel empowered to ask (but won't be offended if at any point you let me know IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS )...my most burning curiosity is how you are framing this within the family context...what are you telling your kids, what will you tell babykins, what about aunts & uncles and grandparents? Obviously, you're not being secretive, and it's early yet, but there must be some interesting subtleties you and your cousin have discussed.

I have a huge extended family, with a few shady spots in our collective history having to with paternity/maternity questions...things my close cousins and I have surmised about from time to time but never gotten a real handle on, so I suppose that's where my fascination originates.

awesome questions well, my kids are 12, 10 and 6. we've talked to them about how babies are made since they were small.. in fact, the older two attended each of their sibling's home births. they are very familiar with how babies get OUT, lol. we've also told them about eggs and sperm, and how they come together to make a baby, etc. so after we received our first positive home pregnancy test, we decided tell the kids about the general situation.. about how cousin really wants a baby, and has tried a bunch of times, but she just can't carry her own. and that i want to help by carrying her baby, and that it might, or might not work. they had never heard of surrogacy before, so that part was new, but we do have friends who have had to adopt, etc because they couldn't carry their own babies, so it wasn't a completely strange concept to them. my youngest, 6 yrs old, probably had the hardest time wrapping her head around it, but understood that cousin's egg + her hubby's sperm = cousin's baby. and not even a little bit ours. which is really important, i didn't want any of my kids to even have a tiny thought that maybe this would be a sibling that we'd be giving up, etc.

after we had our first ultrasound confirming our heart beat, the docs said our chances of success was about 95%, so we went ahead and told our kids "hey, it worked!!". the kids were thrilled. they love babies, and they are so proud to be "big cousins" this time, instead of big brother/sisters. they are very happy that our family can help our cousin's family. we wanted to tell them early, so that they would have 7+ months to really get used to the whole idea before the birth. i've talked to my doula about this extensively, and she recommends NOT having my kids attend this birth, as it's a real bonding event, and it will be very emotional to see me handing the baby over, etc. so the first time my kids meet the baby, it will already be in cousin's arms. we always, always refer to the baby as cousin's baby (or baby LJ, since the mother is L and the father is J).

i do worry a bit that my kids will be sad after the baby goes home (they live 9 hours away), we are all bound to love this baby, no matter what, and of course we will all feel a special connection to him/her. so we are all going to try to make the transition as smoothly as possible. my doula has been a big part of this plan, and she is willing to be with us as much as we need her after the birth.

as for extended family, we have a huge family on my cousin's side... they all live on this small island in northern ontario, and they all know that she has been trying to have a baby for a long time. since she has had so many losses, she didn't want to tell anyone at all until we were pretty sure that this plan was going to work. so she waited until after the heart beat ultrasound, and she told the family herself. they were all pretty happy and supportive (except her MIL, who is thankfully not related to me!!). but my cousin and i decided at the beginning that the rest of the world is just going to think whatever they want to think, and we are just not going to care... if they are negative, then they do not need to be a part of the process. i am glad that i live so far away, so i don't need to deal with any negativity. on my side, i think my mother had the biggest problem with the idea, but she's not a big babies/children kind of person, and just didn't understand why i would want to do this at all. she's sort of come around now.

as for the babykins, we are all just going to be very honest to him/her from the start. he/she will know that my cousins are the genetic parents, and that i just carried him/her. i'll be happy to answer any/all questions that he/she might have as they grow up. most of all, i want this baby to know just how very wanted and loved they are, and that he/she has amazing parents and i am very fortunate to play a role in their journey.

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Old 07-20-2014, 08:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by shelley4 View Post
the rest of the world is just going to think whatever they want to think, and we are just not going to care... if they are negative, then they do not need to be a part of the process.

...

most of all, i want this baby to know just how very wanted and loved they are, and that he/she has amazing parents and i am very fortunate to play a role in their journey.
awww there are tears in my eyes. thanks so much for sharing!
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Old 07-21-2014, 10:12 PM
 
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Is it time for a new weekly?

Loving mama to Aden (8/5/2010) and DSD (15).
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Old 07-21-2014, 10:35 PM
 
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i've talked to my doula about this extensively, and she recommends NOT having my kids attend this birth, as it's a real bonding event, and it will be very emotional to see me handing the baby over, etc. so the first time my kids meet the baby, it will already be in cousin's arms. we always, always refer to the baby as cousin's baby (or baby LJ, since the mother is L and the father is J).
Shelley4, thank you so much for sharing your amazing story! You sound like an amazing mama I think it is so wonderful you have been so honest with your kids and that they have gotten to attend their sibling's births. I have wondered how children might react to attending a birth. When our baby #2 is born in January my son will only be 2, so I feel like he will be too young, and I'm wondering what we will do with him! Anyways, I think your plan sounds good -- though I'm sure it will be emotional to hand over the baby as you say. Thanks again for sharing your story -- I am really moved!
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Old 07-22-2014, 12:05 AM
 
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I've had two homebirths and my older children were present for both of them. When my 3rd son was born at home (1st homebirth), my oldest son was 4 years old and my middle son 2 years old (barely 2). I made sure to have somebody there JUST for them. I did not want to worry about them while I was laboring and I didn't want my husband to worry about doing anything else than just being with me. I also wanted my children to have the option to watch their baby brother being born or to not be present, and that couldn't have happened without the friend I had who came to help with them. My 4 year old ended up watching the birth, but my 2 year old was napping.

During the birth of my daughter (2nd homebirth/1st unassisted birth), my children were all asleep when I went into labor and my middle son (then 4.5 years old) woke up when I was nearing ready to push. Then when my daughter was crowning I screamed like a tea kettle and he ran to wake up his then 7 year old and 2.5 year old brothers, who all gathered around the birthing tub in the kitchen just as I leaned back against the pool with baby girl on my chest. It wasn't traumatic for him, but he was deeply concerned. I did let out a scream when my 3rd son was crowning too, and then my oldest son (then 4 years old) ran out of the room for a moment. He did come back, but made sure to sit in dad's lap for the rest of the birth.

Given all that, if you want to have your children present at your birth, definitely don't think it can't be done. I would just HIGHLY recommend asking them what they want, not pushing it on them, and making sure you have a babysitter that is solely for their care and needs for during labor, birth, and several hours afterwards. That person should be able to give all their attention only to your child(ren) and help create a positive experience for them too. Oh, and be fully prepared to answer every detailed question they have about babies, procreation, anatomy, and anything else birth may make them think of.


Mother, wife, doula, and lactivist.
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Old 07-22-2014, 01:06 AM
 
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Greenmamma, Wow, thanks so much for sharing your experiences with homebirth. So cool. Did any of the littlest ones cry or become upset? I worry that if I go the HB route, that they might want me to hold them/nurse while I'm concentrating hard on getting a baby out.

Wife to my Sweetness and Light, DH (03), WAHM to DS('01), DS('11), and DS('13). Encouraging mothers everywhere to write for their lives. Expecting our fourth and final baby( It's a GIRL!!!) in January 2015.
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Old 07-22-2014, 11:27 AM
 
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writermama12, no, they didn't cry at all. I think they have a very real sense of what is going on and while they may be nervous, they let me have my space. But that is one of the reasons why I suggest making sure you have someone to be with your children, besides your husband. If they do start wanting to get too close for your comfort, then the babysitter can take them out to play or find another activity to distract them. This is important not only for the toddlers, but even for the teenagers too.


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Old 07-22-2014, 06:03 PM
 
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writermama12, no, they didn't cry at all. I think they have a very real sense of what is going on and while they may be nervous, they let me have my space. But that is one of the reasons why I suggest making sure you have someone to be with your children, besides your husband. If they do start wanting to get too close for your comfort, then the babysitter can take them out to play or find another activity to distract them. This is important not only for the toddlers, but even for the teenagers too.
Thank you for sharing, Greenmama! That is so interesting. We will probably have a relative take our son while I am in labor at the birth center. If he was a little older I would consider having him there, but at this point I feel like he won't understand what is happening and I worry it will scare him. I also don't want to feel worried about him while I am laboring. But this is good info to have in case we decide to have more kids. I think it would be amazing to witness a birth as a child -- what a learning experience! I wish we as a culture did not separate ourselves so much from birth/death experiences.

Just curious, what exactly is an unassisted birth? Is that where there is no midwife or doctor present, or is it where a professional is present, but doesn't do anything unless there is an emergency?
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