What if labor doesn't start - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 12-24-2014, 11:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What if labor doesn't start

I have a concern that will become a worry as the month of January goes by. I know babies come in their own time, due dates are estimates, etc. BUT what if labor DOESN'T start on it's own? With my son I had no doubt about when conception occurred. I had no signs of impending labor & I was induced at 42 weeks & a couple days. When he came out (by CS after 30 something hours of labor) he looked overdue, as I was told.

I hold on to the possibility that labor never started because he got stuck on my pelvis & never positioned correctly but I don't actually know if that's a fact.

My doula, my ob, no one is worried about this. How do I reconcile "baby comes when ready/your body knows what to do" with that not having happened last time?

Please ignore typos, I'm mobile.

Loving mama to A (8/5/2010) R (1/3/2015) and DSD (16).
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#2 of 7 Old 12-25-2014, 10:12 PM
 
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I think it is normal to worry about the things that troubled you with the first birth experience (or second or third, etc) as you prepare for the next birth. This is your only point of reference, so of course you are going to feel concerned. This is my second birth, too, and I feel some worries about how things will go as well...will it be as slow as the first time around? Will I have back labor again? Will I bleed a lot afterwards like the first time? It helps me to talk to people about how different their birth experiences have been and remember it is different every time. What else can you do but trust in your body and trust your health care providers?

Have you talked with your doula/ob about your concerns? I talked in detail with my midwife about my first birth and it really helped me process my concerns and understand better why certain things had gone the way they did. It helps me to discuss my fears and make friends with them.

I hope this is helpful and that I'm not totally missing the mark here...try to relax as best as possible (I know, easier said than done) and trust that everything will be fine no matter what happens.
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#3 of 7 Old 12-26-2014, 10:31 PM
 
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Well I thought just what you said before. And it really sounds like a hypnobabies thing that baby's come at their own time. Then my daughter died. She was still born at just under 42 weeks based on my period. But they based her due date on her size early in the pregnancy and said I was 41 weeks when she died. If you go past your due date I would get an ultrasound to check your fluid levels. They didn't do that for me till they fiund out she died and my fluid had nearly run out. Keep up with your kick counts. If your baby is kicking then they are alive. I really do not mean to scare you I just wish I had known this could happen. My baby was fine up until the day I went into labor. Her autopsy showed a perfectly normal baby girl too. She died due to lack of oxygen and we haven't had any real conclusive answers about that. Your risk for having a still born baby increase when you pass your due date. I wish I had known that. And for me because I had one stillborn baby my risk is greater for it than other women. I thought that everything would be fine and it wasn't. I am sorry to be such a downer. I bet everything will go fine for you. Feel free to ignore anything I say. I would just ask for an ultrasound or a non stress test of both if I passed my due date if I was you. That way they can know for sure your baby is still okay in there. I wish you the best and I really am grateful you could help me with the hypnobabies stuff you sent me.

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#4 of 7 Old 12-27-2014, 08:44 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Operamama, my ob is unconcerned. But you know how the they are. My doula also is not concerned but in a kinder way, if that makes sense. I asked the ob at last appointment about my previous birth & he of course hadn't looked at the records other than to verify the CS details for vbac success.

Liladancing! That makes me so so angry for you! When I went over with my son they were doing ultrasounds & checking the fluid level. And now they are checking that & monitoring twice weekly already (benefits of maternal age). I'm so sorry your care was lacking. I hope this delivery is quick & smooth for you.

Please ignore typos, I'm mobile.
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Loving mama to A (8/5/2010) R (1/3/2015) and DSD (16).
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#5 of 7 Old 12-27-2014, 09:24 AM
 
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Liladancing, that is so heart breaking. I can't imagine.

Neonalee, I hope this time is different for you, and your fears are laid to rest.

I hope we all have smooth, calm labors and deliveries this time around. Here's to holding our little cherubs soon
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#6 of 7 Old 12-27-2014, 12:18 PM
 
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Well that is good they are checking you neonalee. So sounds like your birth team is doing a good job. Thanks for the condolences. Yeah I still miss her and what they did was negligence. We are in the process of sueing them to get justice for our daughter. And I met with the board of nurses to see about taking the midwives lisence away who made the call to send me home from the hospital at 4cm dialated and with our daughter showing signs of distress. Her bit strip from her last non stress test where she was monitored for 4 hours shows lots of bad signs of distress that is probably the most damning thing against the people we are sueing. Our expert midwife and expert Ob are all just appalled at what happened. The gross negligence. When I met with the investigators from the nursing board they were shocked too and shocked that the midwife never even apologized. The only good news is she already lost her job and all her privleges to deliver at the only hospital she could deliver at. In fact everyone involved either left the practice or was fired. It is really disturbing.

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#7 of 7 Old 12-27-2014, 12:19 PM
 
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I keep worrying about my son and praying for him. But I woke up this morning believing he would make it to birth. I hope for a long and happy life for all our children.
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Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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