Normally I hate this part. Loathe and dread it. Waited until 14-15 weeks with my second because it is just so painful. However I have recently decided to use a new meteric in telling people.
I told my sister, becuase she watches my kids and would be suspicious. Then I told mom, dad, DH told a brother, and a family friend, because they all live in the same house and its only fair to tell them all so its not quite so hard to keep the secret. DH and I don't have to tell anyone else until I feel like it. By this measure he gets to tell his coworkers whenver he feels like it. And I love this :grin: its so nice feeling no pressure to tell people I don't want to tell just because they are related or this or that. Just one other household :happydance:
It helps that this is my fourth, so its not really news to anyone and isn't an announcement status thing. I'm telling everyone in person thus far but I am contemplating a facebook announcement eventually. This way Idont have to tell anyone to thier face if I think it will go badly. I hate facebook though, and would need to set up a profile, so it would be entirely as a cop out bwhahaahahahaha
You know, I start to tell people right away! I don't really understand the idea that we should celebrate publicly but suffer privately. If I were to miscarry I would want my tribe's support as much as their shared joy after a successful birth...you know? I've already told just about everyone
We have told a few close friends for support and because we see them all the time, so they would figure it out quickly. We are waiting to tell families in person next weekend, which will be after the second ultrasound. I prefer to wait for family and close friends once we have a confirmed heartbeat. I will wait until I'm either showing (which will likely be soon as I showed at nine weeks with my first!), the end of the first trimester, or if I start puking all day at work, whichever comes first. :-D
I was so excited that I had to tell my best friend and sister on the phone. I will probably wait until a heartbeat for others unless it is obvious. I can't wait to share the news since this will be my last planned pregnancy
I agree with you, Mama2ChicknLil. Granted this is my first pregnancy so I haven't had the experience of a loss and having to come back to people with bad news, but I feel like I would want to have poeple to lean on in that case who were informed from the start. My wife and I have also been doing all sorts of fertility, so anyone in touch with our lives knows that this has been a big ordeal. We told my brother and his wife, my parents, my oldest dearest friend, my cousin, and another couple that we're good friends with right away. My wife's family is unfortunately not as supportive as mine, so we'll tell them once the bump is obvious. Since then (I'm 6w4d now), we've told probably 8 other people, a few coworkers and other friends and family. After 2.5 years of trying, it feels so good to celebrate with those who know how hard this journey has been! And everyone seems to have a healthy understanding of the fact that it's early, and we're not out of the woods yet. I think that's the thing - telling people who can sit with you if the pregnancy doesn't work out.
I told my mom and dh mom right away. I told some close friends in a secret fb group for homebirth in our area. I told my Dad, which is the person I dread telling. He did better than last time. He is a anxious negative person and I have to remind him that it is happy news. He took a few minutes but he called me back and sounded excited so I am happy with how that went. I was too excited too wait though and I made a fb announcement this week at 6 weeks.
I told DH right away, and my SIL that I see a few times/wk. Other than that, I would ideally like to wait a few weeks to tell others. 5wks tomorrow. It's kind of fun to have a secret for now We have 3 20-somethings who live with us, so it also feels like a game to see who's brave enough to ask first.
We're a bit cautious in telling people early due to multiple losses, but we did tell immediate family so we'd have their support and prayers. I'm not sure if we'll tell our church friends as soon as we see a heartbeat or if we'll wait until later. I think we'll probably tell them sooner, though, for the support and understanding if I am not up to doing much for the first trimester, or if I lose this one too. We probably won't make a general Facebook announcement or anything like that for our extended family and old friends until the second trimester.
This is tricky for me. We told everyone about our first (DD) around 7 weeks after an early ultrasound. Then our second and third we had decided to wait till 12 weeks but didn't make it that far with either (miscarried at 6 and 8 weeks.) Then with our DS we waited till 14 weeks to tell everyone. With my last pregnancy we told family right away again (last Thanksgiving) and lost the baby days later (7 weeks). It was nice having the support with the last miscarriage that we really didn't have with the other two but I still feel conflict on when to announce. My husband wants to tell family right away again and I just don't know.
It's a sticky subject in more ways than one, but tomorrow I plan to tell my sister. Everybody duck and run. My husband wanted to tell everyone so badly last time, and this time because we are telling ear
Owe (9weeks ish) he's more chill. I hope you find a balance that works for you @519
We're still planning an April Fools Day announcement. I got my 9 month old a shirt that says "Big Brother." I'm just going to casually text that pic to all of the close family & friends April 1
Cat is out of the bag for me at work, thanks to a sudden need to puke and only having enough time to find a trashcan rather than get to a bathroom. [emoji51]
So I still haven't decided when but I have figured out how I want to tell! I'm going to have a set "Dig" game set up (scrabble without the board) with mommy, daddy, DD's name, DS's name, baby Spencer and the due date spelled out. Send out a picture of the set game, saying "look how the game turned out!" and see if people actually look at it and figure it out. What do you guys think. Cute? Tacky?
Sorry your bitti bub "outed" you at work flamingo. I've been telling people as I get opportunities, every waitress will know soon enough, so it seems fair to tell friends in advance.
we were going to wait until we found out if it was an ectopic pregnancy or if we were going to get a heartbeat.
but my first appointment isn't for another 2 weeks when I get to 10 1/2, and it already feels like it's been forever holding it in! Plus i'll be seeing my folks next weekend, so we'll tell them then, they'll be first. In the meantime, I've come here!
Before the end of the first trimester we'll only tell people we're comfortable with sharing any potential mourning, folks who'd support us. Hence my folks and not his.
I'm waiting til Easter. My husband's brother will be back home and the entire family will be together that day. We have a big basket of eggs that sit on the dining room table with everyone's names on them. There is 20 of us all together. I'm going to sneak in an egg that says BABY on it and see who discovers it first. I figured that would be a fun way to announce and everyone finds out at the same time. I'll call my side of the family the same day and let them know the news as well. Easter feels like so far away.
I'm a very private person and don't feel the urge to make an announcment.
But i guess April 1st might be a fun day to tell those who would want to know (family).
There are some people in my life who may find the news a little hard to deal with, so i plan to tell them face-to-face beforehand so they don't get shocked by rumors or anyone else telling them.
I want to get my first ultrasounds first to make sure Junior is healthy and all is well, before i tell anyone.
I'm only 9 weeks and people have already started asking me if I'm pregnant! So I'm pretty much telling anyone who asks or if the topic is relevant in the moment. I strangely feel more weird about people wondering if I'm pregnant than actually knowing for sure.
@madeaux, My sister came right out and asked me. ? I was so upset that she did. I knew I couldn't lie but I really wasn't ready to tell and had a way I wanted to announce it to my family.
So now my family knows but we are still waiting to tell my DH's family and friends at least until after my ultrasound this Friday. I hope I get to announce it when and the way I want with the rest of family.
I am 8 weeks and I've had to tell quite a few people already. I play roller derby so I had to tell my team why I'm going on a leave of absence. I had to tell my boss because my morning sickness has been kind of bad. I've told select family members and other close friends, but not planning on doing an official announcement until some time after my ultrasound on the 23rd, maybe not until like 13 weeks.
I've enjoyed slowly telling people about this pregnancy. I even waited a few days to tell my husband, and it was actually really nice.
I've told the closest people to me, but I like the April 1st idea to tell everyone on Facebook. A sister of mine and I had a fight recently, and I haven't felt up to telling her, but I don't think she will be offended. She isn't really into the whole 'getting excited over babies things'.
We went ahead and announced to everyone (we'd already told family and a few friends) last week when we saw the heartbeat. I know I'm not totally out of the woods for miscarriage yet, but I decided I'd rather have everyone know for the support if we do have another loss, and so they will understand why I'm basically a hermit right now.
How did it go for anyone planning to announce on April Fool's?
I'm trying to come up with clever easter-egg based ways of sharing it with my DH's family this weekend.
I had to tell my co-workers because of heavy lifting at my job. I have been dreading it because I work in a hospital and I didn't want any slack about my plans for a homebirth. I e-mailed a pic of DS wearing a big brother t-shirt to the grandparents at 11 weeks.
we decided to announce today by sending friends/fam a photo of our 2 year old in a big sister shirt. we are going to easter brunch with my husband's family and she'll just show up in that shirt over her easter dress. she's a good announcer.
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