40+ TTC Summer of Love Thread - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 08-25-2010, 06:43 PM
 
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mentalgiant - thanks for your post. Good inspiration for us!
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Old 08-25-2010, 11:07 PM
 
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Hi ladies.I come and read this thread from time to time, but haven't posted much. I just read mentalgiant's post and felt so heartened by it! Well done, teaching that doctor. Beautiful. I really don't like the negativity surrounding older mother's. I live in Australia (it may be the same in the US) and an older mother is described as "elderly". I had my last baby at 41 and was called an "elderly multi-gravida" in my medical notes. It is ridiculous.

Now I'm 43 and hoping for another little one to complete my family. Sometimes I feel selfish, as I already have five children, but the sibling clostest to my 2 year old is 10, and I'd really like him to have a sibling close in age to grow up with (especially with his elderly parents!).

A bit of background for me: I'm using TCM and acupuncture (which I believe helped me conceive last time - 7 months after my DH had a vasectomy reversal), I'm still breastfeeding my son and don't want to wean - I'll let him decide when he is done. I'm also taking loads of supplements in the hope I'll make a nice juicey healthy egg! I'm using FF too.

Now, I'll go back and read the thread properly!

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Old 08-25-2010, 11:49 PM
 
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P.S. I forgot to say I'm on CD 1. I had an encouraging chart http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/186327 and felt some pregnancy symptoms, but it wasn't to be! This is my 4th pp cycle, but I've been wanting to ttc since my little boy was 10 months old!

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Old 08-26-2010, 01:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mentalgiant View Post
I am sending positive vibes to all...and please remember..doctors are not Gods..and when we let them control our thoughts sometimes they can control our destiny. I learned that the hard way....by the grace of a higher power I snapped out of it and said I wass going to someday prove him wrong!
what a fabulous story! you are awesome to be so assertive. thank you for being such a good example for all of us!

xo

~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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Old 08-26-2010, 01:58 PM
 
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I think CD11 could have been O day for sure (with CD12 being the day of the temp shift/1dpo). You don't have enough temps before it to just go by this chart and I can see why a computer program interpreted it as it did. I'd probably take into account when you usually ovulate and what your low and high temps usually look like (tho I think I remember that you just started temping again, so maybe you don't know your usual highs and lows). CD16 could be implantation dip.
dare i even renew my hopes and re-cross my fingers?

http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/27628e

i removed a small patch of ewcm on cd 14, and switched to research method to get the above dotted crosshairs (days 13 & 15 didn't have any detected cm). it still leaves me with a very low coverline. is this chart triphasic?

i find that just can't stop thinking about the possibility of an earlier ovulation. maybe i am just so used to obsessing during my LP, that i just have to find hope here...

i was reading about post-o ewcm about a week after o, due to estrogen surge. that might fit my chart situation?

xo

~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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Old 08-27-2010, 09:42 PM
 
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I was due to start Monday and waited until today to test and.....

BFP!!!

 Mommy to Emily (16), Cal (12) and Claire Bear (3)
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Old 08-27-2010, 09:44 PM
 
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Happy Friday to all you lovelies,

Welcome gumblossom!

Mentalgiant, thank you for sharing that wonderful story with us. Not only is your story inspiring, period, but so is your spirit.

BHappy, I say re-cross those fingers and toes!

AFM, AF showed her face Wednesday, right on time. But I was expecting that this month. The big news is actually that I got my baseline ultrasound and started my lupron/menopur injections with estrodial tabs last night. It began with the high of seeing 16 follicles on the ultrasound screen! The NP who was doing it said my number was "excellent" and that "one of these follicles will produce the egg that will get you pregnant" (I guess my hospital trains 'em well to use positive affirming language).

As for the drugs...it took me about half an hour to spread out all my supplies under surgically-bright light across my dining room table and make sense of the mixing instructions. But the injection itself wasn't bad, and I realized that between acupuncture and monthly blood draws, I've lost any fear I once had of needles. It was weird psychologically... clinical, formal, and so very deliberate. Quite unlike some of the more poetic aspects of procreation! But DH was great, infusing the experience with warmth, humor and love. And so we are off on a new journey...

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Old 08-27-2010, 09:46 PM
 
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I was due to start Monday and waited until today to test and.....

BFP!!!
Wonderful news and blessings!!!!! Congratulations to you


~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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Old 08-27-2010, 10:09 PM
 
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Litmama, that sounds very exciting. I hope you'll be announcing your bfp soon!

Sneezykids - congratulations! Fantastic news. Would you mind filling in the gaps for me - how old are you? How many kids do you have? How long were you ttc?

I've had my head in the Randine Lewis book all week. It's about the fifth time I've read it, but I never get sick of it and I'm trying to work out what I can do to ovulate earlier. The last couple of months it was later than before my last baby.It used to be day 14 or 15, now it has been as late as day 22. Lewis says this can cause problems with the egg and may mean a lack of estrogen. I still can't work out if I have kidney yang or yin deficiency. Can you have both? I do go to acupuncture, but my practitioner seems to think I'm pretty well balanced and I think I disagree...She is also very patient and believe I should just be patient and not to worry about my age...so easy for her to say! I think I will try some nettle tea which may help.

If anyone has any suggestions, I'm listening.

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Old 08-28-2010, 03:54 AM
 
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Sneezykids!

Oh, yay! What beautiful news!! Soooo happy for you!!!

We must have posted around the same time, and I missed your wonderful news earlier today. Please fill us in when you have a moment... how do you feel??

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Old 08-28-2010, 01:11 PM
 
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Congratulations Sneezykids!

LitMama - I love what your NP told you. Lots of good wishes from me that all your effort will be rewarded.

I'm 6dpo here and hopeful (just like last month)
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Old 08-29-2010, 01:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yay Sneezykids!! Wonderful news!!

Welcome, gumblossom!! I just added you to our first page "hopefuls" list. You'll find everyone's ages there. I hope your time here is short and sweet. If you and your TCM practicioner aren't in agreement, maybe consider finding a new one. Mine has a well-worn copy of Randine Lewis's book sitting on her shelf which I always find reassuring. You definitely have company here in TTC while nursing.

LitMama, I love the description of the start of your new journey. I hope it is short and sweet too. And...16 follicles!!

bookwormommy and Bhappy!!

saoirse

I loved your story mentalgiant. Great to have you "stop by." Can you tell me your EDD so I can add it to the front page?

AFM, I decided not to temp this month. Ds just started school and we have to get up very early (for us). I keep waking up about an hour before the alarm with allergies and I know if I temp then I'll never get back to sleep. Also, I am super busy as we are preparing to move. I wasn't even sure I wanted to try this month as I get super moody at the beginning of pg and that just seems like it could be over the edge. My TCM practitioner encouraged me (us!) to try anyway. I appreciated that so we will in a wacky not temping way (I'm a long time temp-er.)

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Old 08-29-2010, 02:18 AM
 
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waturmama, i hope your new schedule settles into normalcy very soon. also hoping for you to catch some of that when you're not paying attention to your chart!

xo

~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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Old 08-29-2010, 11:20 AM
 
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Congratulations sneezykids!!!

Hey Litmama, i saw your post, and wanted to ask you some questions. We seemed to be doing the same things but you are a couple of cycles ahead of me.

How did the soy affect you? I was very frustrated with what happened to me-it suppressed all signs of o, and only the temp shift showed that i may have ovulated, so i took a progesterone test, and i had. But i had no ewcm. I usually dont have a problem with that. It delayed O for 5 days too. Not good.

The following cycle, O was back to normal, but still ewcm was scant.I suspect the soy is the reason. I have never had a problem with ewcm. This cycle im taking epo to be on the safe side.

Im also seeing an RE for the first time tomorrow (monday). I am very hesitant to, because of the cost, ( i am paying out of pocket) I want to try injectibles, and if that doesnt work, im out i guess. (wish i could do ivf)

From what i understand of injectibles, they may increase your follicles/eggs, but that doent necessarly mean increase quality. Im afraid of what they may do to my body.

As for you, why are you taking lupron and menopur, as opposed, to say follistim or gonal f?

I just wanted a precsription for follistim, minimum dose, which is why i am seeing the RE. Im not sure how much he can help me otherwise.

How long have you been seeing your re, and how do you feel about it?

I dont want to do the baseline tests (for fsh etc) because i am breastfeeding and they will be inaccurate. Dont feel like paying the earth for it either, since i wont be going onto ivf.

I have researched many of the drugs, and know which ones are safe while breastfeeding.

Anyway, my appointment is tomorrow, and it will cost $375 just for the consultation, in the realm of $600 or more for a minimal dose of follistim (which is fsh injected near your ovaries), then all the other tests, and presumably ultrasounds.

For all i know the only reason i didnt conceive this month was because of the lack of ewcm, which i normally dont have a problem with, last month the soy stopped me,... and there's always been a reason (like timing, or method) that could have been why i didnt conceive.


Sorry for the novel...

Perhaps others have advice to offer.

Good luck everyone!
Maya
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Old 08-29-2010, 12:16 PM
 
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bfn this am. woke with a high temp, but it was 45 mins later than usual. took a test anyway, because i just wanted to stop wondering. ff on fam thinks i O'd on cd17. it's looking right. if cd11 had been O, i would've got a bfp by now at 15dpo.

just gonna try and chillax through the rest of this lp...

xo

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Old 08-29-2010, 02:29 PM
 
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BHappy, sorry about the bfn! Hope you can enjoy some chillaxation today.

Hi Maya! Yes, it sounds like we're trying very similar things. So let me answer your questions...

First, on soy:

I'm sorry you had those experiences with soy. My experience with was a little different than yours, but I only tried it one cycle because I had some concerns, too. I took 200mg/day of Nature's Way EstroSoy (from cd2-cd7 or something like that, only 5 days). I actually have very little ewcm typically (my fertile fluid is more watery than stretchy) and the soy seemed to actually increase it and make it more classically ewcm-y. I also had major o symptoms... super strong o pains, followed by a huge and very distinct temp shift. At the time, I felt it had delayed my o by a couple of days (I was o-ing cd10-cd12, and that cycle I o'd around cd14), but in retrospect I see that my o-day is that late sometimes anyway. The thing that concerned me is that I had symptoms of ovarian hyperstimulation -- a very bloated, very heavy, painful feeling in my uterus and abdominal area generally. I think we did conceive that month -- I had implantation cramps, tingly boobs, etc. and a BFP followed by AF. And at the time I chalked the bloating and "lead womb" feeling up to that. But now that I've had ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome explained to me, I wonder if that's what was happening? It freaked me out a little to think that I may have had that response without having any way to monitor it. And even though soy didn't suppress my o, it scared me to think that it might, so I didn't try it again. But all that being said, I have heard wonderful stories of soy bringing BFPs to many other mamas.

Now, about REs and injectables:

So I've been seeing my RE for about 6 months now. It's been a pretty positive experience for us, but not without some drawbacks. My RE has a very warm, caring demeanor, sense of humor and uses lots of positive affirming language ("when you get pregnant..." "once you're pregnant..." etc.) Since the nurses are like this, too, it's possible it's an institutional thing (maybe they hire or train for that?). Whatever the case, it's an important part of my positive experience here. It was critical that when I first met him, he believed me that I had been having chemicals (other docs, even my gynecologist, didn't). One thing I love about my RE is that he's actually friends with the prominent TCM practitioner who trained my TCM person and wrote some of the books that sit on her shelf. He's very pro-TCM. The infertility practice is also very responsive via email and phone, which helps. Although the nurses have given me either no information or bad information in the past You just have to be your own advocate and information guru.

Regarding funding and lack thereof, I'm right there with ya, sister. I'm lucky in that we have 100% coverage for OB/GYN and 50% coverage for infertility. My RE actually goes over insurance and costs with me at every visit, and said that because I had had 3 miscarriages in a row (chemicals) he could bill all of the initial tests as an OB problem. So, I got all my blood work and the saline sonogram, etc. for free! He also explained to us that if DH could get the same insurance plan through his work, we would each have 50% coverage and "zero out" the costs of anything billed under infertility. Alas, that doesn't work for us, as our workplaces offer completely different health insurance plans. But beginning with the first baseline ultrasound last week, and picking up the injectable drugs at the pharmacy, we are now down to 50% coverage, which was a shocker. I paid $128 for the first ultrasound and $328 for a 5-day supply of drugs. We actually had no idea how we would pay for it (we have an extremely tight budget and zero disposable income) but resolved to find a creative solution. So the ultrasound went on a credit card, and the pharmacy agreed to bill us. We're now in the process of creative fundraising to try to pay for subsequent ultrasounds and drugs, which need to be paid for next week. I'm told injectables run about $2K per cycle (after insurance) so we are selling big ticket items (we even talked about selling one of our cars), DH is moonlighting like crazy, and we will probably borrow money from family or a bank. We're really taking this one step at a time, and if we end up looking at IVF, it'll be the same deal. We did do a tiny bit of looking into IVF in other countries. But I'm trying to remain positive and hopeful that we won't need to go there.

We're using menopur rather than any of the other drugs because that's all my clinic offers. They negotiate a bulk-rate deal every year, and this year it's menopur. But my RE really believes it works better because it's organic, not synthetic. It's true that injectables do nothing for egg quality, they only help you grow larger follicles and more of them. For a woman my age, they expect me to release 3-4 eggs per cycle. So the benefit of using injectables is that you are simply getting more chances each cycle, with the hope that one of the eggs will be a good, healthy one. I see it a way to speed up my natural process -- I'll get 3 or 4 tries rolled into one cycle. I feel fairly certain that I still have a few good eggs left, so using injectables makes me feel that I'm just going to get to those good eggs more quickly. Egg quality I feel I'm working on by doing acupuncture and making dietary changes. My family calls me the Comtessa Kale I don't think western medicine addresses egg quality at all and so takes a fatalistic point of view... my RE says he feels there is now way to "undo the damage". But that's why we take a multi-modal approach, right?

As for failure to conceive even when all the stars are aligned, I share your puzzlement. Even though we have conceived more than 50% of the times we've tried, I still wonder why each time we don't. I do think there are probably subtleties to the process I might not yet understand. I read recently, for example, that one of the things that can happen to eggs as they age, is the protective outer shell can become thickened to the point that sperm can't penetrate them. So maybe there are some things that are just beyond my control, and I try to get my zen on about that. And just keep doing what I can to change what I can.

Hope this helps! I trust other members of the tribe will have more wisdom to share... and please feel free to PM me if you like! Take care.

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Old 08-29-2010, 06:56 PM
 
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Hey Bhappy, sorry about your bfn. I got mine too this morning on 14dpo. I didn’t have any expectations at all, so I didn’t even really care. (how can I get pregnant without any ewcm because of that stupid soy!)
No period yet tho.

Anyway. Thanks for responding Litmama. You took twice as much soy as I did (I took 75-100mg days 3-7)
Some have suggested taking a smaller dose. And I guess I could experiment with that, but don’t want to waste time.

Interesting about overstimulation in your case, because too high a dose of soy can actually have the opposite effect, like it did with me. I wish I could understand why!

Anyway, 2k on injectibles, ouch! I mean, a minimum dose could be as little as 5 days worth of $60 vials. So under a $1000.

Im thinking once I get a prescription I will shop around for unopened used items you can get on the internet. Could be an option?
I might have to lie about breastfeeding also. I think the re might actually have to do the blood tests in order to prescribe the injectibles. I wish I could avoid that. Waste of money and time.

Sigh…still not sure I should do it, but I guess a couple of grand is not much in the big scheme of things……


If i could have one normal cycle where everything was lined up perfectly (no soy, good timing, no other factors), then i could finally be convinced that my eggs arent fertile anymore(shells too hard maybe?) Then i could make peace with this loss of fertility after having taken it for granted my whole life (thanks mother nature).

I would go the tcm way, but feel i only have 1 or cycles left and then i'll quit.

Anyway congratulations on getting 16 follicles. That sounds extremely hopeful.
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Old 08-31-2010, 11:46 AM
 
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good morning all. is on her way. huge temp drop this a.m. and spotting now. well, in a way its like a rebirth each month. a chance to awaken anew, and who knows what beauty there might be in this new cycle!



xo

~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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Old 08-31-2010, 10:38 PM
 
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BHappy - I love what you wrote this morning. It's so true and so beautiful.

Today I've been trying (with mixed success) to stay balanced and not miss out on my life because I'm wishing away two weeks of it.
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Old 09-01-2010, 03:02 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I love that, too, BHappy.

Mixed success sounds like a good beginning, bookwormommy.

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Old 09-01-2010, 03:49 AM
 
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I love that, too, BHappy

Bookwormommy, wishing you well in finding your balance and in being in the present moment, it sounds like good practice for any spirit.

AFM, things are moving more quickly than I could have imagined. After 5 days on injections, I had an ultrasound this morning which showed two follicles large enough to release, one on each side. I think one was 14 and one was 18 (mm?). I had fully anticipated spending another week or so on the drugs, but because one follicle is about to grow too large, my RE is having us take the trigger shot tomorrow night rather than wait for others to grow. Our IUI is scheduled for Friday morning.

I spent half the day away from work doing this (during a very intense time at work) and when I got back it was difficult to concentrate on anything else. So many logistics... from arranging for time off work to lining up finances to booking extra acupuncture appointments. Yowza! And DD's birthday and party at our house is this weekend, too.

I'm exhausted, but excited. It will all be worth it if this is the path that brings us to our babe. We talked the other night to some friends who had their son (at 43 1/2) via Clomid and IUI. They are now so happily involved in family life they barely remember how the actual conception took place. I keep reminding myself that's what this is about, creating family.

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Old 09-01-2010, 03:44 PM
 
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Thank you everyone! I'm feeling good! Sore boobs, a little bloated, not very hungry (except for CARBS) and pretty mellow feeling. I am experiencing that zap in energy where you can nap during anything! Good luck to all you momma's!

 Mommy to Emily (16), Cal (12) and Claire Bear (3)
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Old 09-01-2010, 10:46 PM
 
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Hi Waturmama....my EDD is 2/27/10 ..a week before my 44th bday.

Sending hugs and baby dust to all...
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Old 09-02-2010, 02:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
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What a wonderful due date! I'm a pisces mama of a pisces, myself. Lots of good wishes to you!!

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Old 09-02-2010, 11:55 AM
 
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Congratulations sneezykids and mentalgiant!

Litmamma, i hope this is the cycle for you. It sounds hopeful.
Any particular reaso you are doing an iui rather than the old fashioned way? Was that the RE's recommendation?

Im still thinking about it for the cycle after this. (on cycle day3 today)
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Old 09-02-2010, 12:47 PM
 
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Hello all....

Well, I got my first BFN, followed shortly by AF. I didn't think anything miraculous would happen on the first try, but still, it was disappointing. I made an apt. w/an RE. I have slightly mixed feelings about it - part of me worries he will essentially tell me I am too old, my eggs are too old, etc, etc. I hope my SO comes, as he is the one who is the most worried about the safety and health ages that could come w me being 44.

I got The Infertility Cure and immediately thought - now this is much more my speed! I love TCM, have used acupuncture successfully for many things, and like her overall approach. I'm going to start using some of her supplements/diet/etc.

Any thoughts about the first visit w the RE? Anything I should or shouldn't ask?

Thanks all!

Mama to AJS - 22, CRS -17 and forever in my heart GHAB 8/5/11/(18 weeks) angel2.gif

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Old 09-02-2010, 07:02 PM
 
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Hi Mamas,

Just wanted to let you know that We had our baby! Fiona Ellen was born at home in the water Tuesday morning after a 4 hour labor! she is beautiful and healthy, and I am fine too. I'm 41, soon to be 42, and we tried for about 2 years, with no medical interventions, just to give you all some background. I did work with a wonderful TCM throughout the (very difficult) pregnancy, and she was a godsend. I wish I had started with her before I got pregnant.

Also, some of you may remember that DH lost his job the week we found out we were pregnant, well, he has been unemployed this whole pregnancy, which ended up to be a blessing, as I could not take care of myself, never mind DS1, AND he just got a job that will start when the new baby is a few weeks old! So we really have been smiled upon by grace.

love and sticky vibes to you all, and thanks for being there.

Wife to Bear - Mom to DS 7, gifted with SPD and DD 2, a Joybunny!
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Old 09-02-2010, 07:45 PM
 
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Congratulations! I love the name Fiona. It's nice to remember when I'm immersed in ttc land that I'm doing this to have an actual baby at the end!
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Old 09-03-2010, 03:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you for sharing your wonderful news, pitchfork! That is so lovely how that worked out with your dh's job. I love that. Happy baby bonding.

music.mama.pdx. Sorry about af. Does it look like your SO will go w/you to the RE? How soon is the appointment? I think TCM is great--it has been for me and many others here, and it seems especially good that it ressonates for you so well.

treehugger.gifMama to DS (3/05 )carrot.gifh20homebirth.gif, wife to DH bikenew.gif, remembering rainbow1284.gifdog2.gifdog2.gif and angel1.gif Spirit 1/07, angel1.gif Hope 5/09, angel1.gif Harmony 6/10, angel1.gif Love 5/11, angel1.gif Joy 6/11
 

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Old 09-03-2010, 09:41 PM
 
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Congratulations, Pitchfork! wonderful news.

I'm a big fan of TCM and acupuncture. It helped me when I was ttc my 2 year old (when I was 41) and really helped me through my pregnancy too. I hope it will help this time too.
I'm reading the book The Fertile Female, written by the same author who wrote Inconceivable (Julia Indichova). She is great. She is so positive and says that we don't need to be so scared about "aging eggs" etc, that we CAN get pregnant and we shouldn't listen to all the negative talk from health professionals, or listen to statistics either. I really do agree with her. I get so frightened by the stats : only a 5% chance of getting pregnant. But how do they get that statistic? Is it from all births? Is it from women with fertility problems who go to fertility clinics? Is it from Catholic countries? Third world countries?I'm just a bit of a sceptic when it comes to stats.

I'm really glad I got that book, and also Spirit Babies by Walter Makichen. It is a beautiful book.
I'm feeling more relaxed about it all now.That said, I don't know how relaxed I'll feel when I'm in the tww.

I'm coming up to ovulation soon, and just wondered if anyone can help me make sense of opk's. I seem to get two days of positive opks, when I test in the morning two days in a row. Does that mean I'm catching both ends of the surge? I also have O pain, usually later on the 2nd + opk day. Should I still be ttc the day after that? Or has the window of opportunity gone?

Music mama - sorry about the bfn. I love Randine Lewis too.I think I've read that book about 5 times. She's the reason I went to acupuncture and I'm so glad I did. Whether I'm ttc or not, it really helps keep me healthy and relaxed.

Wife partners.gif and mama of five grouphug.gif,  Alfie angel2.gif 12/10  and Louie angel2.gif 6/11, CPangel1.gif5/12, CP angel1.gif3/14
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