Birds do it... Bees do it... even Ladies in their Forties do it.... 40+++ Spring TTC - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 08:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Here it is ladies the Spring 40++ TTC thread. Thanks for all the suggestions on the thread name. Let's add to our BFP's list we have a had a good start to spring.

 

Pass the fertility goddess game:

 

Sign up with a pm to me and I will add you to the list. Get the address for the person next in line, and send the goddess to her with a treat, wish, prayer, ttc tip, whatever is in your heart to share and add. When you receive the goddess let us know online, and share the token you got from the previous player if you so wish. Some things may be better private, and I know some of us believe in keeping some things close in order not to spoil them. Here goes:

 

Buzzer Beater

Kristin0105 lady.gif

LitMama  hearts.gif

Karalina   lady.gif

contactmayadust.gif

Stealthee

WaturMama

 

 

Previous threads: http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1288625/fabulous-40-ttc-new-year-and-new-hopes/500#post_16392793 

http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1267754/40-ttc-awesome-autumn-for-starting-a-baby-thread

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Babies Born

kbhlmh/Karen (44) Kevin (boy) born 12/05
noordinaryspider (42) Terran born 1/18/08
Hockeylover/Juls (44) Twin Girls born 12/08
Juneau (44): Baby Girl Eliza Jane born 1/12/09
DoulaMomVicki: Edie Mae born 1/25/09
WV Mommy/Erika (41): Josiah Born 2/5/09
Veganmama719 (41): Declan James born 8/2/09
saoirse2007 (39): It's a Girl!!! Rauri born 8/16/09
ElliesMomma(41) Welcome Shawn Robert born 09/8/09
Pookietooth/Jen (44) Baby Girl 10/28/09
Stealthee (41) A new baby boy, born 1/31/10
Grace24(39) Xavier, born 2/15/10
Sunrise/Sara (43) Lucy, born 2/28/10
zonapellucida (40) Bennet, born 2/28/10
BuzzerBeater (46) Georgia, born 5/20/10
LisaSedai (42) Lily Elise, born 6/17/10
pitchfork (41) Fiona Ellen, born 8/31/10

kel32brown/Kelli (43) baby born 10/6/10

karen1968 (41) Paige Marie, born 11/5/10

M0xxie (43) 1/29/11

2bpeaceful (42) ds born 2/5/11
sneezykids/kelli (41) Claire Katherine (4/25/2011)

Bhappy/Karen (43) Quinn 6/8/2011  


BFP's:


Ompath (40) EDD 12/1/10
NeverBeenHappier (39) EDD 12/5/10
mentalgiant (43) EDD 2/27/11

karmab (42) EDD 6/28/11

greenmama66 (44)

maritimegirl (45)

bookwormommy (42) EDD 8/8/11
mamamerle (40) 8/8/11

Saoirse2007 (41) EDD 10/25/2011

moona (41)

EonJourney (41)

Lotus1 (40) EDD 12/27/11

Music.mama.pdx (44 ) EDD

ContactMaya (44) EDD 01/24/2012
purplefish

Fuller2 (43)

Homebirthy (44) 3/2012


HOPEFULS:

alittlesandy/Sandy (40)

beachlover (44)

Boozhemama (40)

contactmaya (44)
fuller2 (43)

gerlassie (42)

Gumblossom 44

Halifax40 (43)
heathenmom (39)

homebirthy/Amy (43)

hopeful mom2be (43)
Karalina (45)

kay99 (40)
kbhlmh (48) 
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/8fcb8
kittyl/Kitty (42)
 Kristin0105 (45) 
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1dfb40
lauraloveshorses (40)
lauri0115(43)
LitMama (43)

lotus1 (40)
 lovestolearn (47)

lovetolaugh (40)
lovbeingamommy/Kate (45)

mamapajama (40)
MI_Dawn (39) http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/212b8a
moona (41)
music.mama.pdx (44)
naturallyspeaking (39)
nymomma

purplefish
reikibirth/Toni (45)
saoirse2007 (41)
Sapphos/Laura (41)

Shelley71 (39)
shy (40.5) 
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/25ec6f

skeemama

Spiralchrissy (39)

StargirlHB
Stealthee (42)

Stevi (42)

TenzinsMama

THANKFULFORFIVE (42)
Waturmama (44)




GETTING READY

carfreemama (42)
Folaboye

 



 

If you have information to edit or update, please PM me and I will make changes and additions ASAP. I have a really good feeling about the spring for us we have several new BFP's! Let's add to the BFP list.

 


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#2 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 11:21 AM
 
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I would like to join in. Maybe I'll learn something new from my peers? (grin)


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#3 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 04:03 PM
 
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Hi Kristin, can you add me to the hopeful's list. I'm 44.

 

Thankyou for getting the new thread up and running.I love the title!

 

I'm 12 DPO and fully expect AF today or tomorrow. My temp dropped this am, though it isn't below cover-line. My boobs still tender, and one thing I noticed was I've had no pms symptoms, but I wonder if that is cos I'm sugar-free. I did a couple of tests yesterday, both BFN, and I didn't even bother today.

 

If my LP ends up being longer than 14 days I'll test again, but I'm fully expecting AF. Then I don't know what's going to happen with TTC. Not sure if I want to keep discussing it with DH - we are slowly making progress, but we never end on the same page...I just wish I could accidentally get pregnant and it would be a "fate-acompli". Hope everyone else is doing okay....

 

Stargirl.I have the same problem with formatting my messages. I end up having to click on the source  button a few times, and the "normal" one until it works.A little frustrating.I'm not sure why it happens, but I always preview my message and play around with it then. HTH.


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#4 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 05:12 PM
 
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hi stevi!

 

still sick...ugh

 

ds (4) has to have a tooth pulled :(  his baby sister hit him in the mouth with a bottle last Nov and now there is an absess and the root is dead...I am sooo sad-he won't get a new tooth until he is at least 6 :(

I will google alternatives this weekend

 

love the new thread title...I hope srping works its magic on this thread!

 

Eta: due date October 25


mom to ds '07 first day of a new year, dd '09 in the caul, and  ds '11 at home Oct 24th

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#5 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 06:23 PM
 
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Oh Saoirse I feel your pain. My 6 year old fell down two steps when he was 2 and hit one of his top front teeth. We ran him to the dentist the next day and he thought it would be fine, but sadly a few months later it absessed and he too had to have his pulled. It made me sad at first seeing that big gap in his smile, but I promise eventually you don't really notice it all that often. Just becomes the norm. He's finally lost his two bottom teeth in the past month, so  I suppose sometime in the next year we'll see the beginning of that adult tooth in that top space(well I suppose he'll lose the other front top tooth first(although our youngest dd didn't lose them until she was 8) but it will seem odd when he finally has two teeth up there again...lol

 

I saw your u/s post. I think 1.7  nuchal fold is a great number. Mine was 1.3 with my youngest and he was perfect and I was 41 at the time of the test.

 

When do you expect the results?

 

Kristin love the new thread title:-)

 

Hi stevi...welcome

 
AFM, I'm 1 DPO  so not much to report...lol
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#6 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 07:17 PM
 
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Hiya Saorise2007!

 

Thank you BeachLover!


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#7 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 09:38 PM
 
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Hi All,

 

Welcome, Stevi and Stargirl (sp?)! Hello to all other mamas! I look forward to catching up with you soon...

 

I am hopelessly behind after being in post-surgery land all week/weekend. I'm on #3 in a series of 4 outpatient surgeries for a knee problem, and this one was supposed to be relatively minor, but completely kicked my @#$. I was up all night one night being sick to my stomach from the meds, and I have to admit, I did think "this is a great reminder of what the first tri will be like."

 

In fact, it was kind of a downer week in other ways as well... I went to see my new TCM practitioner, a young woman in her 20s who has no experience working with fertility issues. She made several comments that were meant to be encouraging but left me in tears... along the lines of "well, it's certainly not impossible for someone your age and with menstrual clots (stagnant blood) to get pregnant." She seemed to think that my series of UTIs and knee surgeries (and post-op infections) over the past several months have created some obstacles for me, and that I need to clear them out before I can conceive. That did seem to make sense. I can actually correlate the deterioration of my CM with the onset of these other health issues. Interesting. And yet it really brought me down to think I've been thwarted by health issues beyond my control. 

 

THEN my DD's father became problematic again (he's threatened by my DH's role in my and my DD's life and periodically threatens legal action, etc.) and the stress was so tremendous I just felt ready to give up on ever moving forward toward the life that I envision for us. I really felt doomed to spend the rest of my fertile years just trying to ward off these attacks, never able to really transcend the stress.

 

Somehow, though, I emerged! Ta-da! Persephone returned from her trip through the underworld!

 

For this, I think I have to thank my wonderful family, the new perspective I've gained from doing LOA exercises (I can now hear the Universe sending me its multitude of hopeful messages), and of course... a little estrogen! Man oh man, I love the Beauty Goggles of an approaching ovulation. The world is fresh and new, life is full of limitless possible... even my DH looks a little bit hotter as he sits reading his newspaper. 

 

So I'm now probably on O-day today. We got in some good BDs. My latest obsession, though, is wondering exactly how long DH's swimmers can live in my sub-par CM? Does anyone know? I seem to recall having read 6 hours somewhere (as opposed to the 3-5 days of my previously-luxurious CM... DH and I used to have pretty regular chemical pregnancies, some of them with a 3-5 day stretch). Which makes me wonder if we need to getting in two sessions per day?

 

Hope everyone is well... I'm sorry this post was all about me. I can't wait to read and catch up with all of you!

 

xo


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#8 of 500 Old 04-18-2011, 11:15 PM
 
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Kristin, I love the way you wrote the thread title!! love.gif

 

My friend IRL, M0xxie had a beautiful baby girl on 1/29/11, so that can be updated. Also you can delete 2bpeaceful from the BFP list since she is on the babies born list for that pregnancy.

 

More later, but just wanted to show up on this excellent thread. grouphug.gif


treehugger.gifMama to DS (3/05 )carrot.gifh20homebirth.gif, wife to DH bikenew.gif, remembering rainbow1284.gifdog2.gifdog2.gif and angel1.gif Spirit 1/07, angel1.gif Hope 5/09, angel1.gif Harmony 6/10, angel1.gif Love 5/11, angel1.gif Joy 6/11
 

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#9 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 03:55 AM
 
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Litmama have you tried "preseed"? It is supposed to help out the swimmers. I have used it and got pregnant when I did, but not sure if it really makes the difference. I often wonder about how long the window of opportunity really is. Last cycle my cervix was definitely shut up tight the day  before O, then open on the day of. I think in the past my window of opportunity was much longer. My first pregnancy I got pregnant from sex at the end of my period - around day 7. And I'm certain of it because my boyfriend lived in another town and we only saw each other every two weeks. We were quite young, so much more fertile than now obviously.

 

I'm sorry your TCM lady didn't make you feel too good. Just remember what my TCM woman said - we've got plenty of time, and the acupuncture will really help. I sure hope your knee issue is going to be solved soon.

 

As for me, I was silly enough to do another test today, and predictably, it was BFN. I still have symptoms, even felt nauseous tonight because I was hungry, and quite fatigued. But, unless there's two lines, I just can't think that I'm pregnant. Tomorrow is when AF should arrive - 13dpo - I've had an 11 and 12 day LP since the miscarriage in Dec.

 

I'm reading The Power, hoping I can use the laws of attraction, but it is sometimes hard. I'm also reading about the primal diet - all good stuff for my head and heart.

 

Well, I have to run - we are going out for dinner (my DH's staff dinner).I'd rather stay home, but know that I need to sometimes make the effort for my DH.


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#10 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 06:12 AM
 
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Hurray for the new thread!  Thanks Kristin.

 

Welcome Stevi!  Weird, I was just thinking about you.  This might sound a little creepy, but I followed your posts during your second m/c and have occasionally stalked you ever since.  It was before I even joined MDC and you were one of the few women here who was my age without children already.  I was hoping so hard for a good outcome during your ordeal.  So, I hope I haven't weirded you out and I'm really glad you decided to join us.

 

Gumblossom:  Well, shoot.  Sorry that it feels like AF is on her way and that TTC is still up in the air.  How are you liking The Power?  Would you recommend it?  I've not heard of it before. 

 

Saoirse:  Sorry that you are still feeling sick and that your son has to get a tooth pulled.  Poor little guy. 

 

Litmama:  A rampage of appreciation for wonderful families and LOA!  Glad you made it past surgery, discouragement and belligerent ex.  I'm sure you know all the usual TTC tricks of improving CM, but just in case: Evening Primrose Oil, grapefruit juice, green tea, guifenesin, Chinese herbs.  :)   No disrespect toward your TCM practitioner, but  maybe it would serve you better to find someone who has experience in fertility issues.  In the Bay Area, you are spoiled for choice.  I graduated from the American School of Traditional Chinese Medicine in S.F. 10 years ago and I could recommend a couple people if you are interested.

 

Hi Beachlover:  Welcome to the 2ww!

 

Waturmama:  Thanks for letting us know about Moxxie- another 40+ success story.  Love it!

 

Sorry if I missed anyone.  I did personals on my last post in the old thread too.

 

AFM:  I'm CD 8 and just thinking about my BD strategy.  :)  Last cycle started DTD at least once a day from CD 5 (I think) and it started to feel like a chore by the time I actually ovulated on CD16.  I don't think my DH minded though.  I'm thinking about every other day from now till CD 13 and then every day till I ovulate.  And just at night.  Anyone else hate morning sex? 

 

 

 


DS 31/01/10, TTC #2
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#11 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 08:46 AM
 
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Stealthee...   No, I am not weirded out in the least. I took a short break after my second miscarriage, then was on the One Thread on and off for most of 2009. I started TTC more regularly again in 2010, and have been on the One Thread ever since. Yesterday I decided I would like to be a part of the One Thread and a new thread, so here I am!

 

Everybody Think Fertile Thoughts!


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#12 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 08:58 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thread updated to here. You ladies are keeping me on my toes! Stealthee we will vouch for you that you are not really a stalker just an interested bystander. 

Stevi we cross posted LOL . welcome to our new thread. Hope your stay is short and sweet.

 

 

Hope everyone is having a great day. Waturmama thanks for the birthdate for M0XXIE.

 

I can't keep all that names straight for personals but I am thinking of you all. Will add, Litmama I agree with Stealthee I would find a TCM practioner who specializs in fertility. I think that is really important at our age ;)


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#13 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 11:29 AM
 
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Welcome Stevi - Good to see you over here too!

 

LitMama - I just had a surgery yesterday on my elbow, so I feel you on the health issues. I also have a cyst on my left knee, but for now I'm only doing physical therapy on that. Hope you heal quick and get back on track!

 

 

AFM: Elbow surgery went well! I believe the nerve is repaired because the only pain I feel now is obviously related to the surgery - the other pains seem to be gone!

 

As far as TTC goes...it looks like I did not ovulate this month. My monitor never read past high and went back to low yesterday. It was only the first month using it, so I know that might take a while. But, unfortunately, my temp never rose. greensad.gif  AF is due Friday. I called and left a message for my OB's nurse to see what they think. I don't know if they'll make me wait two more months since we've only been trying for four. I hope not. I'll update after I talk to them.


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#14 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 01:09 PM
 
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Shelley71...   Stress can totally screw up your cycle. Also, I would lie about how long you've been TTC, unless the doctor already knows.


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stevi View Post

Shelley71...   Stress can totally screw up your cycle. Also, I would lie about how long you've been TTC, unless the doctor already knows.



Ahh! I wish I had thought of that! I told them 4 months on the phone today. I quit BC last October though, maybe I can swing it that way (even though we used spermicide until January). LOL


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#16 of 500 Old 04-19-2011, 01:42 PM
 
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Shelley71...   When you see them in person be sure to drop that you've been trying for 6 months, and act like the 4 months was a mistake. Say you meant that you had been charting for 4 months, but trying since October when you quit BC. Grin


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#17 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 09:02 AM
 
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Nice new spring thread!

 

Saoirse - I tested BFN on Friday and read your post... which inspired me to wait until Monday to test again... then BFP!

 

Only thing is that I am having mild cramping since yesterday which is really freaking me out since I had m/c at 4 weeks last month.

With my son, I do not remember any cramping at all.

Still with nausea but manageable. With the baby that I lost in the fall I was nauseous at 4 weeks and progressed to HG at 5 weeks.

 

Gumblossom - how are you feeling?

 

Any one else have cramping that turned out OK?

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#18 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 10:44 AM
 
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Congrats lotus1.joy.gif Cramping is totally normal. I will admit though, that I've had two losses the last two months (chemicals I guess you could call them, although there was grey tissue involved both times) but anyways, I can distinctly tell when the cramping is pregnancy related and when it means things aren't going well. For me, when it's all over and not going to make it, I start getting that heavy crampy achey feeling in my labia area. In my good pregnancies, it's just a general cramp in the abdomen.

 

How many dpo were you when you got your BFP? Will you get betas done? I never choose to anymore, but I know many like to know what's happening.
 

 
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#19 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 11:07 AM
 
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Lotus1...   I can't help with cramping info, I only had cramping near the time of the miscarriages. But I have headr many women complain of cramping around the time of their BFP, and go on to have full term pregnancies. Try to think positive!

 

AAM...   The BDing has begun, I'm hoping to keep it going everyday until after I ovulate.


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#20 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 11:15 AM
 
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Beachlover - My cramping is general in the abdomen, off and on, seems more on right side. Today is 14DPO.

 

I will get betas done but am waiting a little bit. My doctor has already ordered the test, so all I have to do is show up at the lab. But I'm afraid b/c of what happened last month.

 

Last month I had a beta of 32 at 11DPO then spotting followed by cramping at 13DPO, rechecked beta - down to 7. Next day heavy bleeding x 4 days and some greyish tissue too. Then 1 week later beta down to 1. guilty.gif

 

I had a beta last week at 7DPO and it was 2. Way early I know but I asked for the test. However, this was higher than my last beta after m/c. Friday's HPT was negative at 10DPO and Monday's was BFP at 13DPO. redface.gif I used FRER which I think is sensitive at 25 miu.

 

Hoping this is a good one!

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#21 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 03:45 PM
 
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Congratulations Lotus. I usually get cramping in early pregnancy. I hope this one is a sticky one for you.

 

After getting my hopes up a little because AF didn't turn up yesterday at 13 DPO like it usually does, she came today. I can't say I'm surprised. I really didn't feel pregnant.I guess it is good that my  LP is a day longer.

 

I just want to get pregnant already but I know I need to be patient.I'm tired of the ttc and tired of the battle of wills with me and my DH.He doesn't want to change his mind, so it looks like I won't be properly ttc until November (that was his compromise). It's crazy to wait that long, but it's better than nothing at all.

 

 

 


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#22 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 05:13 PM
 
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Lotus.joy.gif...go get your betas!!!!! you are pg- it will be nice for you to see.

I got my beta done the day after my Monday bfp and it was 66....so it must have been dang small on the friday!! I got them rechecked in a couple of days to check for doubling...takes some of the fear out of it....


mom to ds '07 first day of a new year, dd '09 in the caul, and  ds '11 at home Oct 24th

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#23 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 05:30 PM
 
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Woohoo lotus!!! joy.gif jumpers.gif joy.gif

 

I have been having a lot of cramping this pg too.  I did a search on these boards and found a thread I had started asking about cramping the last pregnancy. innocent.gif There are lots of happy stories there about crampy pregnancies resulting in babies. Many women seem to think they get crampier with each successive pregnancy. Maybe things are moving faster. I found that comforting. Lots of good wishes to you!!

 

gumblossom (((hug))) so sorry about AF, and about the "compromise." I don't think it is really a compromise, but it doesn't sound like you are on board with it. I hope things improve there.

 

AFM, I was 6 weeks yesterday. I hope to have an u/s next week, but for a variety of reasons am having a tough time getting it scheduled. Yesterday I had a change in my symptoms and I totally freaked out. I had my dh convinced the pg was over. I sobbed to him, myself, a good friend, journaled. In some ways I think I was letting go off all the little worries that I have been keeping at bay. I feel lighter today. (Good that I am still having plenty of pg symptoms). It is sad to think of losing the pregnancy, but also scary to think how old I'd be by the time I got to ttc again and what it would mean to me to have had one more m/c. I hopehopehope I don't have to deal with that and the little one is growing along just fine.


treehugger.gifMama to DS (3/05 )carrot.gifh20homebirth.gif, wife to DH bikenew.gif, remembering rainbow1284.gifdog2.gifdog2.gif and angel1.gif Spirit 1/07, angel1.gif Hope 5/09, angel1.gif Harmony 6/10, angel1.gif Love 5/11, angel1.gif Joy 6/11
 

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#24 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 06:15 PM
 
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Just had to pop in from Club Bajingo to say, this is the cutest ttc thread title ever. Good luck all! dust.gif



ecstatic about BFP #2 after another round of Clomid,
TWINS!
EDD 2/15/2015
thrilled to welcome #1 after 17 months of ttc, 1 round of Clomid

DS LG  08/03/12
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#25 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 06:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you it was a group effort. :) good luck to you too.


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#26 of 500 Old 04-20-2011, 06:29 PM
 
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i am not ttc nor am i 40+, just had to say that i LOVE the title of your thread.  awesome!

 

good luck ladies (i may just be joining you in another year or two -- if/when we decide to have another).


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#27 of 500 Old 04-21-2011, 05:51 AM
 
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Hello everyone!

 

Stevi:  LOL!  I really am just a concerned bystander.  Thanks Kristin, for vouching for me. 

 

Shelley:  Glad that your surgery went well.  Did you hear back from your OB-Gyn yet?  I wouldn't think they would make you wait another 2 months.  The situation at 40 isn't the same as at 35, unfortunately.  But I would also, um, stretch the truth if necessary.
 

Lotus:  Yay!!!  joy.gif joy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif   Sending you lots of sticky vibes.  goodvibes.gif  I had a lot of early cramping during my pregnancies, but it did feel different than AF cramps or m/c cramps. 

 

Gumblossom:  Sorry about AF.  I'm praying for a happy accident to find you. 

 

Waturmama:  It's so hard to relax and enjoy the beginning of a pregnancy once you've experience loss, isn't it?    hug2.gifI hope you find a way.  I'm glad you're feeling better today.

 

AFM, DH and I had our 4 year wedding anniversary yesterday.  We went out to dinner and DS came along.  We thought about getting a sitter, but we really like his company and he's such a huge part of celebrating our relationship together.  20 April (2009) was also the date of my LMP when I was pregnant, so I'm hoping that this is a fertile time of year for me. 



 


DS 31/01/10, TTC #2
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#28 of 500 Old 04-21-2011, 08:05 AM
 
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waturmama !!! joy.gif

 

i just happened across a thread in the dec 11 ddc, and saw a post from you !

 

so so so very happy for you mama love.gif and blessings on you and your baby.

 

 

just popping in here. almost 34 weeks and getting ready to see this little one in the near future. sending love to all of you ladies ! xo


~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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#29 of 500 Old 04-21-2011, 10:57 AM
 
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BHappy! So glad to see you. Wow, 34 weeks. That is awesome. Thank you so much for your fertile mama blessings on me and my little one.

 

Stealthee, thank you for your understanding.

 

I'm loving the thread title love that we're getting, and that it truly was a group effort.

 

gumblossom, I keep thinking about you, maybe because your story is so familiar to me. Maybe because two days ago when I was freaking out worrying about this pregnancy, I felt frustration and great sadness about the time when we didn't try--something I hadn't felt for a long time. I think I wrote this before, but does your dh understand the odds? Now I hope and imagine that your personal odds are better than those because you do feel a baby calling and I believe in those baby callings. But the stark numerical odds aren't good and would probably say that if you start now it is unlikely you will conceive before November anyway. In a way it seems that his side of the compromise ought to be your age and that for each individual month the odds are low. I think he can trust that if you get pregnant it is because a baby wants to be with you. Maybe you've said all this. I think you are going to want to know that you did everything you possibly could do. And maybe you have, so this is moot. I truly hope that that helps in some way and does not add to your stress.


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#30 of 500 Old 04-21-2011, 04:25 PM
 
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Waturmama, thankyou for your wise words. I started the day feeling quite sad and angry that I'm not pregnant this month. But I took myself outside to the garden - pulling weeds, cutting back the overgrowth, clearing beds for new vegetables, and it helped me gain some clarity. I keep thinking that I should let it go, loving my DH enough to let this rest, but hard as I try, I just can't(just born stubborn I suppose).

 

Later on I was reading something - it may have been on a thread on the net, or a book, but I remember it saying something about getting to your fifties and looking back - with regret, or without regret, and it helped me gain perspective. Honestly - if I can give this my best shot, and still don't get pregnant, then there will be no regret. If we get pregnant and have a baby - will we feel regret? I seriously doubt it. If I have another miscarriage? No, at least I'll know I was trying for a healthy baby.

 

So it seems it is still a question of integrity - I have to give this my best shot if I'm to live authentically.

 

We are going away this time next week, for a few days, taking the kids, but will get some time alone too I think, so that might be a good time to discuss it.

 

Is anyone doing anything fun for Easter? It's going to be low-key here. We will have an Easter egg hunt, and probably do some special baking.

 

Lotus - how are you feeling? I hope that little bean is burrowing in...


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