The "Last Week of Summer" One Thread for September 9th - 16th - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 11:32 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all the replies guys.  I'm still totally freaked out.  I mean, I knew, sure it *could* happen but now that it has I'm not sure I'm ready.  DH assures me this is completely normal and does not make me the worst person in the world but I remain unconvinced.  I'm a bit of a control freak so the idea of not being completely in control of my body really freaks me out.  Plus I had some stomach issues a couple of years ago and never really fully recovered so the whole morning sickness thing really freaks me out.  Although if it's how I've been feeling the last few weeks I can handle that.  Part of my body issues stem from my mother constantly telling me that "she was skinny too before she had kids" implying that once I have them I'm going to turn into a whale.  It doesn't help that she insinuates I'm fat every chance she gets (I'm 5'7'' and 140 lbs right now which is a bit higher than I like).

 

There's also the fact that I really have no idea how far along I am because I haven't had a normal cycle yet.  There are two possible times that it could have happened, one before I started charting and keeping track when we were just not trying not to and one after when we were trying.  Those were about 2 weeks apart.

 

I hear everyone on the finances thing, that's one of my big hang ups.  I know we do well for ourselves and are saving a ton right now but knowing that daycare will take a really large chunk of my salary is really scary.  There are plenty of people who aren't nearly as well off financially as we are and they manage so I know theoretically we'll be fine but it's hard to convince myself of that without actually seeing what it'll be like.

 

Regarding my mother, she's undiagnosed but I'm pretty sure she has something called borderline personality disorder.  We just had a truly craptacular day with her on Saturday and my brother is preparing right now to cut her out of his life.  DH and I are working toward the same thing and I know the baby will be one of the last straws.  She's currently throwing a tantrum because my bro and his wife and baby didn't go to her house this past weekend (3.5 hrs away) because the 4 wk old baby had a cold.  Apparently there was name calling, accusations of being selfish, threats to cut them out, random insults at my dad's gf (they've been divorced for 18 years), etc.  When we saw my grandma this past weekend she kept talking about how important mothers are when one first has a baby and all I kept thinking about was how to keep mine the hell away from us (I guess if I'm protective of it that's a good sign, right?).

 

So yea...still freaked.  Called and left a message for my doctor to get in.  I know it's possible this one won't stick too since it's my first cycle off the pill.  I didn't temp today but my temps have been falling some and IIRC that's not a good sign either.

 

And I'm really, really gonna miss sleep.  I do love it so.

thumbsup.gif It's all gonna be OK. Pregnancy lasts almost a year for a reason. The preparation is a process. In a lot of ways having a baby simplifies your life, puts things in perspective, YK? I would recommend a book called "the Birth of a Mother". I remember reading it when I was pregnant and it helped. Get your library card out and start reading! Just stay away from the scary books, there is no good gonna come out of worrying more.


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#32 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 12:58 PM
 
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Hi ladies,

Sorry I have been gone for so long. A couple months ago my husband I decided to stop trying which is why my fertility friend is pretty much blank. Last month after 16 months of TTC we finally got our BFP! Unfortunately at about 5 weeks we lost the baby. Now I am 18dpo (the following month) and I'm like 99% sure I am pregnant. Mostly because I had spotting at 10dpo and idk why else I would have been spotting except implantation bleeding. Last month when I got my bfp I kept testing negative until 18dpo so the negatives haven't been very discouraging. I just received my wondfo tests in the mail and I am going to test tomorrow morning. The dpo is all kind of blurry to me because I wasn't paying any attention, I honestly didn't think I could ovulate if I didn't have a period and I didn't think to consider the miscarriage a period. I guess really I'm only like 85% sure I'm pregnant, everything is just timing exactly how it did when I got my bfp. If I ovulated like last month we definitely bd around the right time... so we will see. Emotionally I am all over the place. I can't get over that I clearly had implantation bleeding and that we have increased fertility after miscarriage. I am totally anxious right now. My plan is to just finish work, go to the gym, and then go to bed early that way I can get up early.

Oh yeah, and to top everything off my husband is working out of town and won't be home until Thursday night so idk if I should call him if I get bfp or just wait. I'm sure he will be excited but scared, we did not plan on getting pregnant so soon after (like I sai, it seems dumb but we didn't know we could). It feels good to be back on mothering during this emotional time. I'll have to go back and get updates on everything that has happened while I was away. Hopefully there are a lot of bfps. Baby dust to all.

-Emily

hola.gif Married to and TTC with my best friend since 03/06/11 luxlove.gif. One angel.gif and hoping for our rainbow!. bouncy.gif In the meantime, just loving life and trusting God.
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#33 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 01:36 PM
 
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Hi Everyone, 

This is LisaAdkins20, I changed my username :) 

After taking the whole summer of TTC, my DH and I are back on TTC #1! Could I be moved to WAITING TO O?

 

It is so very encouraging to read that I am not the only one who goes from the gut wrenching need/want of a baby to total panic after unprotected sex :) In one moment I think that maybe we should wait one more year, and I feel confident in that decision. The next day all I want to do is to have a baby here already. It is so confusing, and I think it confuses DH more than me. Sometimes I feel like I can't tell him about any of this, because I know that he is nervous and that he is worried. And I don't want him to be even more worried when he know how i feel sometimes....

 

Also, regarding the finances, I am completely freaked out. We will have to start paying if student loans starting January, and I am not sure how we can afford a baby. But before now, our main point was to graduate so that we can afford a baby. I am starting to believe that there is never a time in which we will be able to truly afford one, so I guess we are just going to have to deal with it :)
Our cars are paid off, and we don't have any other debt other than student loans and our house payment. SO I guess that is a good point to start at right?

 

I am also worried because all of my family is in Germany, and I never imagined myself having my own family so far away from them. I already miss them so much and I don't know how I am going to do this without them here to support me! 

 

On top of everything, I am just feeling terribly emotional.... redface.gif

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#34 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 01:54 PM
 
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Hi all....I'm back. Miscarried my little miracle baby at 5w6d. My midwife gave me the go ahead to start trying again immediately. She told me that many women are most fertile after a miscarriage - the only reason to wait would be a 2nd trimester loss or else for emotional healing.

 

I never saw a heartbeat, but I'm not sure if this makes it easier. I got a very early BFP and have been celebrating this new life for weeks now. It hurts an awful lot to lose this pregnancy, but I'm determined to move forward.

 

I already started temping this morning, so can you please add me back to Waiting to O? (And remove me from graduates, please?) Thank you so much. Best of luck to you all! stillheart.gif


Wife to the sweetest man in the world and Mama to 2 precious boys (7 and 9), and one little miracle girl (born June '13)

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#35 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 01:54 PM
 
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Anyalily - This time around I am completely with you on the anxiousness. I feel more scared than excited about the idea of being pregnant although the idea of having a baby fills me with tons if joy. I also know what you mean about trying to lose weight. I have gained back every single lb I lost before the first pregnancy. (emotional eating and drinking). I have been going to the gym every day a nd eating smaller portions, but if I'm pregnant this month there is no way I will be as small as I want to be. For me it's all about vanity though, I want to be all belly when I'm pregnant, not all fat. My plan is to just keep exercising and replace fat with baby even if the number on the scale goes up.

ahikaru Being 2 months away from debt free is exciting. My husband I recently had the finances talk too, I think it's funny that you say "we well have 9 months" because I have said the same thing before. Last month we accidentally and pregnant (proving all the "as soon as you stop trying it will happen" Sayers right) and DH was really confident about money even though the month before he said there was no way. I think they can look at things more realistically our at least more positively when having a baby is a reality. and justjenny after my loss I said I would aLONG time to test that way I could save myself the heart ache and anxiety but as soon as I saw that implantation bleeding it was all I could think about (probably because it caught me off guard) and I'm anxious anyway.

congrsts Amanda! I will be praying everything goes smoothly. I'm sorry about your mom. My mom had borderline personality disorder asking with other things. I have moved 10 hours away from her because if it. I think it's important that you take care of your self and family and not worry abut what she wants. I'm sending you lots of strength during this trying time.

SORRY for any spelling/grammar errors, I am on my phone.

hola.gif Married to and TTC with my best friend since 03/06/11 luxlove.gif. One angel.gif and hoping for our rainbow!. bouncy.gif In the meantime, just loving life and trusting God.
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#36 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 02:00 PM
 
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Let's test on Sunday, OK?

update!


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#37 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 02:34 PM
 
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SweetMama34...   The emergency room doctor told me the same thing about "no reason to wait to try again" with an early loss. He said the body does not go through anything to really heal from in the first 3 months. I also read many many times over the years that fertility is raised for the three months following a miscarriage. I hope you are part of that statistic and get your new BFP right away!


43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#38 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 03:44 PM
 
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Thanks, Stevi. :)


Wife to the sweetest man in the world and Mama to 2 precious boys (7 and 9), and one little miracle girl (born June '13)

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#39 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 04:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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InLove2009 - Welcome back! 
 
SweetMama34 and FreedEm- welcome back to you both, too. I am so sorry for your losses. I hope your stays here are short and sweet! FreeEm, do you want to be in waiting to know?
 
I have moved everyone as requested. Please check and make sure you are where you want to be. I am still a baby threadkeeper, just getting the hang of it.
 
I'm off to the gym. I took a fun Zumba class yesterday and I now am going to go play around with the elliptical and watch some stupid TV. I have been sticking to my diet the last couple of days and already the pounds are sliding off. Watch, this is the month I get the BFP! I have been trying to diet for ages...
 
Ciao bellas!

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#40 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 09:37 PM
 
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Hi ladies,

Sorry I have been gone for so long. A couple months ago my husband I decided to stop trying which is why my fertility friend is pretty much blank. Last month after 16 months of TTC we finally got our BFP! Unfortunately at about 5 weeks we lost the baby. Now I am 18dpo (the following month) and I'm like 99% sure I am pregnant. Mostly because I had spotting at 10dpo and idk why else I would have been spotting except implantation bleeding. Last month when I got my bfp I kept testing negative until 18dpo so the negatives haven't been very discouraging. I just received my wondfo tests in the mail and I am going to test tomorrow morning. The dpo is all kind of blurry to me because I wasn't paying any attention, I honestly didn't think I could ovulate if I didn't have a period and I didn't think to consider the miscarriage a period. I guess really I'm only like 85% sure I'm pregnant, everything is just timing exactly how it did when I got my bfp. If I ovulated like last month we definitely bd around the right time... so we will see. Emotionally I am all over the place. I can't get over that I clearly had implantation bleeding and that we have increased fertility after miscarriage. I am totally anxious right now. My plan is to just finish work, go to the gym, and then go to bed early that way I can get up early.

Oh yeah, and to top everything off my husband is working out of town and won't be home until Thursday night so idk if I should call him if I get bfp or just wait. I'm sure he will be excited but scared, we did not plan on getting pregnant so soon after (like I sai, it seems dumb but we didn't know we could). It feels good to be back on mothering during this emotional time. I'll have to go back and get updates on everything that has happened while I was away. Hopefully there are a lot of bfps. Baby dust to all.

-Emily

You're not alone, for sure! So sorry to hear about your loss...and thank you for being back here, to show those of us in a similar situation that there's hope in our very  near future! Best of luck to you...keep us updated!


Wife to the sweetest man in the world and Mama to 2 precious boys (7 and 9), and one little miracle girl (born June '13)

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#41 of 62 Old 09-11-2012, 10:22 PM
 
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Anyalily, ggreat job sticking with the diet and wtg on the weight loss already!

Married 12/08 to Chilean DH and mama to DD 2/2/10. We're a bilingual home and we familybed1.gif and toddler.gif

 

Expecting #2 in late June!

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#42 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 04:54 AM
 
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No AF yesterday, so I tested this morning and pos.gif It's faint, but it is definitely there smile.gif (click for a larger picture)



joy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifyikes.gifbouncy.gifbanana.gif - That about covers my feelings!

My DH was excited, but then told me "But don't have twins!" rolleyes.gif: And I'm sure his financial worrying will start again like last time. I definitely sit down and plan out a budget, but I don't just start worrying like crazy like my DH does, so I hear all of you ladies there!

Katie trekkie.gif - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13  hug.gif 

 

 

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#43 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 06:57 AM
 
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Congrsts Quinalla! What kind of test did you use, I've never seen one that looks like that. But definitely two lines, how exciting!

Married 12/08 to Chilean DH and mama to DD 2/2/10. We're a bilingual home and we familybed1.gif and toddler.gif

 

Expecting #2 in late June!

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#44 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 07:17 AM
 
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Thanks smile.gif It's from saveontests.com, I'm too cheap to buy tests in the store, so I just order them online for super cheap. I think they actually come from Canada, but you can pay with dollars. I used them for this time and when TTC for my DD, though I sprung for the pee-on-a-stick test this time, last time I just got the dip-strips like they have at the doctor's office as they are even cheaper.

Katie trekkie.gif - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13  hug.gif 

 

 

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#45 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 08:44 AM
 
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No AF yesterday, so I tested this morning and pos.gif It's faint, but it is definitely there smile.gif (click for a larger picture)

joy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifyikes.gifbouncy.gifbanana.gif - That about covers my feelings!
My DH was excited, but then told me "But don't have twins!" rolleyes.gif: And I'm sure his financial worrying will start again like last time. I definitely sit down and plan out a budget, but I don't just start worrying like crazy like my DH does, so I hear all of you ladies there!

congrats! how many DPO are you?


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#46 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 09:32 AM
 
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Congrats Quinalla!  How exciting for you :)  Thanks for that tip for saveontests.com. I'm frugal too and pregnancy tests are expensive!  I hate shelling out the $$$.


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#47 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 10:00 AM
 
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congrats! how many DPO are you?
13 DPO, I'm so excited!

Yeah, I might buy them at the dollar store, but we don't have any that are really convenient. I just can't see buying 1 or 2 tests in the store when I can get 10-15 tests online for the same price or cheaper including shipping. Store tests are great in a pinch, but when planning to TTC, it's pretty easy to order online when you start and tests will be there when you need them.

Katie trekkie.gif - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13  hug.gif 

 

 

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#48 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 03:19 PM
 
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oh btw...

 

 

 

my major symptoms were spotting 7-10 days after conception, bleeding gums and heartburn... you can move me to graduates please.


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#49 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 08:06 PM
 
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aHikaru & Quinalla...   Congratulations!!!!!

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43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#50 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 10:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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kitteh, thanks. I had another good day. I am hitting my stride.

 

Quinalla and aHikaru, wow wow wow! Two in one day. That is serious mojo. A BIG congrats to you both.

 

Quinalla, let me know when you want to be moved to graduates!

 

AFM, I peed on a Wondfo this morning, and BFN. No surprise, I am only 6 DPO today. I will try again tomorrow. Why not, right?

 

G'night ladies!

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#51 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 10:43 PM
 
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I also caught the testing bug after reading about the recent BFPs. I'm somewhere between 7 and 9 dpo and probably shouldn't even be thinking of POAS for another few days, but I went for it anyway and got the dreaded EVAP LINE, ugh. As if I need any more reason to overly obsess and delude myself, lol.

 

I'm sure I'll be testing every morning from now til the 20th. Thank god for internet cheapies!


Married 12/08 to Chilean DH and mama to DD 2/2/10. We're a bilingual home and we familybed1.gif and toddler.gif

 

Expecting #2 in late June!

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#52 of 62 Old 09-12-2012, 10:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I also caught the testing bug after reading about the recent BFPs. I'm somewhere between 7 and 9 dpo and probably shouldn't even be thinking of POAS for another few days, but I went for it anyway and got the dreaded EVAP LINE, ugh. As if I need any more reason to overly obsess and delude myself, lol.

 

I'm sure I'll be testing every morning from now til the 20th. Thank god for internet cheapies!

Ooh, I consider evap lines hopeful! I've never had one.


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#53 of 62 Old 09-13-2012, 06:53 AM
 
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Thanks everyone, please move me to Graduates. Good luck to all of you ladies, I hope we get many more graduates this month smile.gif Sorry about passing the testing bug on to everyone, though it isn't too bad if you are using the cheap internet tests!

Katie trekkie.gif - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13  hug.gif 

 

 

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#54 of 62 Old 09-13-2012, 07:17 AM
 
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Waiting to O. CD 1. gloomy.gif


Breastfeeding, Cloth-Diapering, Co-Sleeping, Babywearing Mama to a Sweet Little Boy slingboy.gif

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#55 of 62 Old 09-13-2012, 07:53 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Waiting to O. CD 1. gloomy.gif

Boo, sorry! 

 

Quinalla, I moved you. Congrats again!

 

Kitteh, did you test this morning?

 

The bad news is that I had another negative Wondfo on 7DPO. The great news is that I have lost 5 lbs since Monday! I LOVE the start of a diet, that crud weight that comes off right away is so encouraging. Now I just need to keep up the momentum.


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#56 of 62 Old 09-13-2012, 08:30 AM
 
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Thanks for the responses everyone.  Feeling less freaked but still a little miffed about all the things I have to give up like control, buying new normal clothes, being able to see my toes, my ability to not feel crappy, sleep, etc.  But hey, I finally get to put stuff in that empty bedroom opposite ours.

 

Regarding the finances thing though I think we figured it out and found a daycare nearby that is really reasonable and will still allow us to save a fair amount of money each month and not adjust our lifestyle much, if at all (aside from the obvious adjustments).  We recently paid off our student loans so we've freed up that money too which should cover most of the baby expenses for a while so that helps too.  I have determined that we probably could never afford to have more than one.  Seriously, how do people do that?  We live pretty modestly, we don't deprive ourselves, but we're awesome savers and got ourselves set up in a nice, inexpensive house that we can stay in for as long as we wish and do quite well but I don't think we could pay for two in daycare unless daycare was them hiding under my desk all day.

 

I guess I can be moved to graduates.  I made the mistake of saying I didn't really feel pregnant yesterday and that I was still somewhat unconvinced that I actually am (it was a dollar store test after all - and wouldn't you know it we bought 3 and 3 ovulation tests too, plus a big thing of cups...).  My body is making sure I'm aware this morning; nausea, headache, and my back feels like it's trying to kill me.  And I have to work extra this evening (heh...doing childcare, ironically).

 

Oddly enough I think doing private childcare (aka being the babysitter) for the last 12 years has actually been part of what freaks me out about being a mom.  I know how relieved I was to go home most days, especially when I was doing it nearly full time and I saw it all so I don't have that rosy outlook thing going on.  But work is just that, work.  Even if you love what you do there are going to be 'those days' and I'm sure it's no different than parenting.  I'll love my kid but I probably won't like her all the time.  And sometimes I'll need a break.  And that's ok.

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#57 of 62 Old 09-13-2012, 04:02 PM
 
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Congrats aHikaru! So glad you got your bfp! 

 

hug2.gif MyName  

 

As for me, I'm still waiting to O. CD8 today.


JustJenny and DH of 20 years 
 
After a 2 year fertility struggle  - Baby girl is here! Jan 8th 2014 
 
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#58 of 62 Old 09-13-2012, 08:58 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anyalily View Post

Boo, sorry! 


Kitteh, did you test this morning?

Yup, and I got a BFN. And then I tried again in the afternoon, and also this evening because apparently I'm addicted to POAS and I guess one bfn just wasn't enough of a disappointment for one day.

I'm trying not to get too discouraged. At best I'm 10dpo, but also possible that I'm only 8dpo. So we'll see. I'm expecting AF between the 18th and the 20th, so there's still time (to obsess and drive myself and DH crazy)

Married 12/08 to Chilean DH and mama to DD 2/2/10. We're a bilingual home and we familybed1.gif and toddler.gif

 

Expecting #2 in late June!

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#59 of 62 Old 09-14-2012, 12:34 PM
 
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Got another BFN this morning, but then I did a cervical check a few hours later and had some brown and red spotting. Only at the cervix, nothing has shown on my underwear or toilet paper (sorry, tmi) So I don't know if this is a little late to be implantation spotting, or just REALLY early AF showing up. I guess I'll just keep an eye on it and hope that it doesn't turn into anything more. I should probably not test til Sunday or Monday, but knowing myself I doubt I can hold off, lol.


Married 12/08 to Chilean DH and mama to DD 2/2/10. We're a bilingual home and we familybed1.gif and toddler.gif

 

Expecting #2 in late June!

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#60 of 62 Old 09-15-2012, 11:12 AM
 
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Spotting has turned bright red, but it still is just spotting and not normal period flow. I've had cramps and a dull lower-back ache pretty much since the middle of my cycle, so I have no idea what is up with that. I took a (few) test(s) this morning and I swear I see a super faint line, but it is also entirely possible that I'm imagining things. I guess I have no choice but to wait and see.


Married 12/08 to Chilean DH and mama to DD 2/2/10. We're a bilingual home and we familybed1.gif and toddler.gif

 

Expecting #2 in late June!

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