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-   -   A Saner TTC: Hunter's Moon (http://www.mothering.com/forum/178-trying-conceive/1365778-saner-ttc-hunter-s-moon.html)

dakipode 10-15-2012 04:26 PM

Hello all and welcome!

The original "Sane 2ww" thread was started by zenquaker and you can find it here: original thread. This is a continuation of the "Sane 2ww" thread and we felt "A Saner TTC" was a natural evolution. We will start a new thread each new moon and name it for the upcoming full moon.

 

Here's the gist of the original thread: this is a space to re-conceive the 2ww as a time of waiting and contemplation. Although we don't judge those who wish to poas frequently, symptom-spot, or do chart analysis, this a space set apart from that activity. We share our thoughts about other ways to approach the 2ww and all parts of our cycles. We encourage each other to feel our feelings fully and to greet all possible outcomes with openness.

 

We hope you'll join us!


dakipode 10-15-2012 04:51 PM

bearandotter: I laughed at your comment "DH is from Mars". Mine is the same way. I tell him "I just want you to comfort me" and he doesn't know what to do, I literally have to give him instructions: now say this, now hold my hand, etc.

As for the magical thinking: I bought prenatals last month for that reason. This month back to my normal multi. I compared them, they pretty much have the same amount of vitamins, including double the recommended dose of folic acid, and they're much cheaper!

 

Margo: sorry you were disappointed this month. Symptom spotting is hard to avoid but that's why we have this thread, right? I wish you good luck on this next cycle!

 

Lidamama: your comment about technology also made me think of The Business of Being Born movie and how doctors started labeling pregnancy as a medical condition. Of course we want to monitor things and make sure they're progressing in a healthy way but do we really need to freak out about it? Women have been doing this since a long time before modern medicine.

To answer your question: last year I started thinking about a lot of that stuff (labor, delivery, how and where etc.) when my friend was TTC and we'd discuss it. Now I try not to think about it so much. In a silly way I feel like I would jinx myself if I did. Just like when I calculate the due date based on my ovulation and I feel like that somehow keeps me from getting pregnant. Because surely if you do these things it means you're REALLY thinking about TTC and everyone says you should not think about it in order to get a success... So that's what goes on in my crazy over analyzing mind...

 

GISDiva: I like your mantra. It gives me a feeling of peaceful surrender. I think it closely approximates what I try to go for during 2WW: surrender, being open to possibility and accepting the outcome.

 

revolting, devilish, happy2bamama, Xerxella, virgo, JustJenny: how are you ladies doing?

 

AFM: took my last Clomid yesterday, I didn't get any side effects from it (at least not so far). I'm feeling calm, waiting to O, let's see if it tricked my body into getting things going...


revolting 10-15-2012 05:26 PM

Dakipode - Good luck with the clomid. Hoping for you!

 

12dpo here, and moving to the point where I'm second guessing my desire to test right after I expect my period. I rather not know about an early loss, but since I'm pretty sure of when I ovulated, I don't know if I could not suspect even without a positive test. I know for my miscarriages, I struggled the most when I strongly suspected that I was losing the pregnancies but didn't know for sure. 

 

In the meantime, I've been thinking about what I want to do once I get to the "missed period" stage. In our house, we've generally called October's moon the Blood Moon (and worse yet, November's moon Dead Moon for a thread like this). I've definitely had a not-so-great feeling towards blood lately: each menstruation feels like a failure; each miscarriage came with so much blood, more blood than I've ever seen. And I really want to work past that. In the last thread, a few mamas talked positively about feeling like menstruation brings a new beginning. My partner is gone all week, so he won't be able to share with me the time when I expect my period, so I've been working especially hard to make sure I have some ways to pamper myself (wine, chocolate, and a good fantasy novel to read in the bath!) and get ready for another opportunity to try again. I've read a lot about lunaception over the last few weeks, and given my personal spiritual path and my ttc journey, I think I'd enjoy trying it. And if I'm pregnant...I don't know if this sounds totally defeated already, but I've been thinking about starting to collect the supplies for postpartum cloth, figuring that even if I miscarry, I'll have a way to pamper myself...and something to hold onto about the pregnancy (even in a kind of gross way) that I don't from my other miscarriages. I'm a Pagan and right now, Samhain (sort of like Day of the Dead) is coming...and I still haven't found a way to honor my lost babies on my beloved dead altar, because I have nothing from those pregnancies.

 

Anyway, one of my favorite poems that I like to read around the Hunters Moon, or Blood Moon as we call it, is The Moon from the Porch by Annie Finch:

 

 

Moon has dusks for walls,
Octobers days for a floor,
crickets for rooms, windy halls.
Only one night is her door.

 

When I was thirteen she found me,
spiraled into my blood like a hive.
I stood on a porch where she wound me
for the first time. My tight and alive

 

body flooded to find her,
to know I would not be alone
while I moved through tides that don't bind her
into womanhood like a flung stone.

 

With each waxing curve into fullness
I grew with her, ready, wild;
I filled myself up like her priestess;
I emptied myself like her child.

 

Flooding, ready, and certain,
I hid her—full, fallow, or frail—
beneath my long summer's rich curtain
which covered her face, the thin grail

 

that delivers me now. I am with her.
All cast shadows come home.
I stand in these shadows to kiss her;
I spin in her cool, calming storm.

 

Now as I move through my own beauty
and my shadow goes deeper than blood,
oh triple, oh goddess, sustain me
with your lights simple opening hood.

 

Maybe it's weird, but this poem brings me a lot of comfort.

 

Baby dust to all!


JustJenny 10-15-2012 10:11 PM

Hi everyone, just checking in :)  I'm on CD10 and recovering from the flu. Feeling much better this afternoon, with my energy returning. I've been Oing around cd16-18 so I've got a little ways to go....Good luck during Hunter's Moon everyone!


devilish 10-15-2012 11:39 PM

Dakipode: I hope clomid remains easy on you but with all the pluses that go with it.

 

 

I picked up my clomid today prepared for next cycle. I'm on CD18 and there's no sign of EWCM or any indication of ovulation. Looks like another 60 day cycle for me which means October AND November are busts for me. I'm glad I insisted on the clomid for December. Although, the current soundtrack on repeat in my head is the FD voice saying "I'm certain you'll be pregnant before you see me next." Really, asshole? REALLY?

 

I'm really bitchy tonight and I don't know why. IF (and that's a big IF) I didn't know any better, I'd say AF would be showing up in the next few days (but I know better).


Xerxella 10-16-2012 08:43 AM

devilish - I hate docs that say that. I'm glad the doc is on board with being more aggressive. Good luck with the Clomid, even though it'll be a while before you're on it. I wish I could say the bitchiness was gearing up to O... Maybe?

revolting - I don't think there's anything wrong with preparing for the worst. It's better to be surprised in a good way than a bad way. hug.gif

justjenny - We're cycle buddies! I'm cd 9. But, there's no telling for sure when I'll ovulate.

dakipode - Congrats on finishing your last day of Clomid! You're on about the same cycle as justjenny and I. Are you cd 9 now? Are you doing any monitoring with the Clomid? For some reason I'm REALLY excited about your cycle! I have no idea why.

wave.gif to everyone!

AFM - As stated above, I'm cd 9. I've been working with an RPL (Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Specialist) and she changed hospitals right before my last loss and now she's still settling in and not taking patients yet. Ugh. So, they think maybe by the end of the month or next month. I'm on the waiting list.... I think when I do get in to see her, I'll ask to be a little more aggressive with the TTC part alone. If I'm going to be losing them, I might as well get pregnant as quickly as possible to see if I can get a sticky one at some point.

Lidamama84 10-16-2012 12:18 PM

Thanks for the new thread, Dakipode! Sorry to hear you can't get your brain to stop over-analyzing. grr...that's frustrating!

 

Bearandotter: Sorry to hear about being sick! Yuck! What's BW? (I think that's the acronym you used...it was on the other thread)

 

Revolting: I loved the poem!! I think that's a great idea to start getting some PP things together. Things like cloth pads and RRL tea that you can use now during TTC and menstruation and throughout your third trimester/postpartum. It's like opening your mind to what comes after the TTC process instead of focusing on TTC :) As far as testing early goes, I have never tested until at least a week after AF is due, so I don't know if I've ever had a chemical. I think I prefer it that way. I never thought about testing earlier, I guess...and I've never taken more than one test. I guess I just assume that everything will be good. But of course, if recurring losses are happening, like in your case, it seems wise to know about it and try to find out how to fix it.

 

JustJenny: Sorry to hear you're sick too! I had a nasty bout of something last week too. Luckily I took a few days off to rest and took Olive Leaf extract and the combination seems to be working to get me better...slowly...

 

Devilish: 60 day cycle! That really sucks!! Glad your doc agreed to give you Clomid. Have you tried Vitex or Maca in the meanwhile to try to get things started?

 

AFM: Soo...all this talk of cycle days made me want to see what CD I'm on. CD 11, apparently. I don't see any signs of O coming soon, tho. Oh well. I'm planning on grabbing some Maca one of these days if I can ever get to the health food store after work. I always have two tired and hungry kids with me which doesn't make for a good trip to the store shrug.gif

 

Talking of the old days...my mom and grandma had lots of fertility problems. My grandma had my mom right after getting married, but couldn't conceive again. After lots of hounding the doctors for an explanation (this was the 50s), she found out that she would never have kids again. She recently shared with me that she contemplated committing suicide at that point, but then she couldn't because she had my mom and she thought to herself "who will take care of my Maria?" (though my grandpa was around and involved and everything, lol). My mom also had a lot of trouble conceiving. Without ever using BC, she only had 3 pregnancies in 25 years of marriage. The first ended in a MC, and my bro and I are 7 years apart. For me, the point is that not so long ago we had so few options to deal with IF, so it's great to see that things like Clomid, IUIs and IVF exist...on the other hand, I think they give a false security, that no matter how long you wait to have kids you are guaranteed to get them...it seems like its so hard to find a balance for timing your kids...


devilish 10-16-2012 12:39 PM

Lidamama84: My PP cycles have been weird. It alternates between 35(ish) day cycles and 55 - 60 day cycles. September was the shortest with 32 days. Irregardless of how long it is, I'm still not ovulating. I don't get a temperature shift and during the trans vaginal ultrasound (ugh) I had 52 (!!!) follicles. My regular cycle prior to my pregnancy was 32-35 days with a 15 day LP.

 

I did try Maca, and that was made feel really weird and nauseous the whole day. My DH, too.


JustJenny 10-16-2012 12:58 PM

Lidamama-  I totally forgot about Olive leaf! That stuff is awesome. I have to make a vitamin order and I think I'll add that to the list for cold/flu care to have on hand. 

 

Revolting- I loved the poem and your ideas. I agree its so difficult not having something tangible to honor our lost babies. Sometimes its as if they only existed in our minds. It is really hard to share those thoughts for me and I'm glad that you mentioned them :) Dh is really good about comforting me but he never had the physical experience, you know?

 

Devilish- What is with Doc's doing that! Its not comforting in the slightest. In fact thank you DR. for dismissing every concern I just discussed with you....banghead.gif

 

Xerxella- I think its funny how so many of our cycles are close. I think you me, Dakipode and Lidamama are all cd 9 or 10! I hope we all get good news this cycle! We're due for some bfp's!


coati456 10-16-2012 01:40 PM

Hi, I would like to join. My husband and I have been TTC for almost a year now, so I could really benefit from a peaceful community. Sometimes I let myself get my hopes up and sometimes I don't. I'm a scientist, so I kind of like to think of every cycle as an experiment.

 

Right now, I'm on CD 27, should be the last day of my TWW. My temperature dropped this morning, so I think I'm out this cycle. At the moment, I feel okay about it. I have a doctor's appointment scheduled for November.
 


beingmommy 10-16-2012 04:09 PM

Hi all!  I've been trying to stay away from the TTC groups a bit lately to help me not obsess.  Heh, sort of works (but not really).

 

Margo, so sorry for the disappointment.  It's hard.  But glad you are ready to hope for the new cycle.  I always feel sad for a few days after a BFN and then get optimistic again.  A new cycle at least feels full of possibility.

 

Bearandotter, any news yet for you?  Did AF come or are you still in limbo?  

 

Dakipode, fingers crossed for the clomid for you! I over analyze everything too.  I am really working on doing it less but sometimes it feels like it takes as much energy to stop the obsessing as it does to obsess. eyesroll.gif

 

Revolting, hugs!  I think it is wonderful that you are looking for a way to honor your lost babies.  And it's hard not to think about future losses once you've suffered losses.  I know I sort of expect to keep having losses.  I don't know any other way to think.  So preparing ahead makes sense to me too.  It's sad to think about but it also gives me comfort to know how I will handle a future loss. Helps me feel stronger.  I know how you feel about not testing to not find out but also it being hard if you don't know if you are having a regular period or an early loss. I hope you find the answer that gives you the most peace. Beautiful poem too, thanks for sharing it.

 

JustJenny, Glad you are feeling better.  Hope this cycle is good to you!  And there are a lot of close cycles!  I am on CD 11 today.  

 

Devilish, oh what an insensitive doctor!  Sorry you had to deal with that. Ug!  I am glad you have got clomid for your next cycle but sorry it looks like it might be a wait.I am hoping it comes quicker for you.  

 

Xerxella, sorry for the waiting list. What a drag.  But glad you have plan in your mind.  I feel that same way about wanting to get pregnant quickly if I am going to have losses.  It ends up taking up so much time going through the loss and getting your body back to normal!  I hate the feeling that if it takes forever to get pregnant that the fear of loss is so much bigger.  

 

Lidamama, it is strange to think of the days when we had so little information.  My mom never had an ultrasound or got to hear a heartbeat.  She just missed her period and assumed that was it from then on.  My last pregnancy ended in a missed miscarriage and we had decided to do as little testing as possible so no early ultrasounds.  I sort of wish we had now because then maybe I would have known earlier and could have avoided the entire month I thought I was pregnant (and was sick as a dog 24/7) when the baby had actually already passed away.  I think if we manage to get pregnant again I'll likely do a few early ultrasounds just to avoid that torture, although I am not happy about the extra testing.  Humph, it is a blessing and a curse, the advances we have now.

 

Hi coatie, glad you found us and sorry it looks like AF is on her way.  Hopefully your next cycle here will bring good things!

 

AFM:  On CD11.  Think I actually *might* be ovulating right now (which would be neat because we managed a BD last night - yay!).  But I am so not sure.  I guess we'll see.  Last week I was telling my DH that I could not imagine another baby in our lives.  Like I literally, with my vivid imagination, could not see it.  There was just a blankness when I thought about it.  I was wondering if it was a sign that it wasn't meant to be for us.  Then I did some work around my fears of another miscarriage and had an unexpected resurgence of grief about my loss in June.  And since then it's so vivid I can almost *feel* a baby in my arms.  So strange. I am hoping it's a good sign.


revolting 10-16-2012 04:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by devilish View Post

Dakipode: I hope clomid remains easy on you but with all the pluses that go with it.

 

 

I picked up my clomid today prepared for next cycle. I'm on CD18 and there's no sign of EWCM or any indication of ovulation. Looks like another 60 day cycle for me which means October AND November are busts for me. I'm glad I insisted on the clomid for December. Although, the current soundtrack on repeat in my head is the FD voice saying "I'm certain you'll be pregnant before you see me next." Really, asshole? REALLY?

 

I'm really bitchy tonight and I don't know why. IF (and that's a big IF) I didn't know any better, I'd say AF would be showing up in the next few days (but I know better).

 

Good for you about insisting. I hate doing that kind of stuff. Good luck!

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxella View Post

AFM - As stated above, I'm cd 9. I've been working with an RPL (Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Specialist) and she changed hospitals right before my last loss and now she's still settling in and not taking patients yet. Ugh. So, they think maybe by the end of the month or next month. I'm on the waiting list.... I think when I do get in to see her, I'll ask to be a little more aggressive with the TTC part alone. If I'm going to be losing them, I might as well get pregnant as quickly as possible to see if I can get a sticky one at some point.

 

I hope the RPL helps. I didn't even know such a specialist existed.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lidamama84 View Post

 

AFM: Soo...all this talk of cycle days made me want to see what CD I'm on. CD 11, apparently. I don't see any signs of O coming soon, tho. Oh well. I'm planning on grabbing some Maca one of these days if I can ever get to the health food store after work. I always have two tired and hungry kids with me which doesn't make for a good trip to the store shrug.gif

 

Talking of the old days...my mom and grandma had lots of fertility problems. My grandma had my mom right after getting married, but couldn't conceive again. After lots of hounding the doctors for an explanation (this was the 50s), she found out that she would never have kids again. She recently shared with me that she contemplated committing suicide at that point, but then she couldn't because she had my mom and she thought to herself "who will take care of my Maria?" (though my grandpa was around and involved and everything, lol). My mom also had a lot of trouble conceiving. Without ever using BC, she only had 3 pregnancies in 25 years of marriage. The first ended in a MC, and my bro and I are 7 years apart. For me, the point is that not so long ago we had so few options to deal with IF, so it's great to see that things like Clomid, IUIs and IVF exist...on the other hand, I think they give a false security, that no matter how long you wait to have kids you are guaranteed to get them...it seems like its so hard to find a balance for timing your kids...

 

My maternal grandmother was infertile. She became a mother via adoption. I know my mother had at least one miscarriage (since I know that when she was pregnant with me, we were initially triplets but she miscarried one), but I haven't talked to her much about it. She knows about a miscarriage I had as a teen, but none of the others. And...I'm in my mid-twenties and have had multiple losses. I had my first loss in my teens. I couldn't have started much earlier, and I still have gone through this. I try to stay thankful that I'm in a place where I can have my children young and more fertile, since I don't know if having kids later in life will be an option with me given how much of a journey this has been for me younger, and be grateful that I have the beautiful children I have...and also try to be okay with that maybe this will be our family, the all of it...not to give up the dream but I sometimes feel like the more losses I have, the more desperate I feel to have a third. I want to make peace with what is, before we seek out specialists or interventions, because even after all that, who knows if we'll have another baby at the end.

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJenny View Post

Lidamama-  I totally forgot about Olive leaf! That stuff is awesome. I have to make a vitamin order and I think I'll add that to the list for cold/flu care to have on hand. 

 

Revolting- I loved the poem and your ideas. I agree its so difficult not having something tangible to honor our lost babies. Sometimes its as if they only existed in our minds. It is really hard to share those thoughts for me and I'm glad that you mentioned them :) Dh is really good about comforting me but he never had the physical experience, you know?

 

Devilish- What is with Doc's doing that! Its not comforting in the slightest. In fact thank you DR. for dismissing every concern I just discussed with you....banghead.gif

 

Xerxella- I think its funny how so many of our cycles are close. I think you me, Dakipode and Lidamama are all cd 9 or 10! I hope we all get good news this cycle! We're due for some bfp's!

 

Thank you! I totally hear you on husbands not getting the experience. I think for my husband, a lot of his experience of the miscarriage was fear for me. I hemorrhaged with my first miscarriage, but I still chose to miscarry naturally the second two times. I sometimes think his memory of fear often overshadows the grief, especially since the pregnancies were still early enough to seem really abstract despite seeing the baby pass. So, we experienced it very differently.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by coati456 View Post

Hi, I would like to join. My husband and I have been TTC for almost a year now, so I could really benefit from a peaceful community. Sometimes I let myself get my hopes up and sometimes I don't. I'm a scientist, so I kind of like to think of every cycle as an experiment.

 

Right now, I'm on CD 27, should be the last day of my TWW. My temperature dropped this morning, so I think I'm out this cycle. At the moment, I feel okay about it. I have a doctor's appointment scheduled for November.
 

Welcome. We are cycle buddies. I am 13 dpo today.


revolting 10-16-2012 04:35 PM

We must have posted at about the same time!

Quote:
Originally Posted by beingmommy View Post

 

AFM:  On CD11.  Think I actually *might* be ovulating right now (which would be neat because we managed a BD last night - yay!).  But I am so not sure.  I guess we'll see.  Last week I was telling my DH that I could not imagine another baby in our lives.  Like I literally, with my vivid imagination, could not see it.  There was just a blankness when I thought about it.  I was wondering if it was a sign that it wasn't meant to be for us.  Then I did some work around my fears of another miscarriage and had an unexpected resurgence of grief about my loss in June.  And since then it's so vivid I can almost *feel* a baby in my arms.  So strange. I am hoping it's a good sign.

 

I think it's a good sign, that you are moving through the grief journey and healing from the miscarriage. No matter what else happens, that's important.


Lidamama84 10-16-2012 06:32 PM

Revolting: Yeah, I know it's definitely not just age that has to do with infertility and miscarriages...sorry if it came across that way...my grandma and mom were both really young (early twenties) when they went through their fertility issues. I'm curious: what's the difference between Hunters Moon and Blood Moon?

Welcome, coatie456 I hope your stay with us is short smile.gif

JuestJenny: I can't believe someone else knows about Olive Leaf!!! I started researching natural antibiotics last year after a really rough year health-wise (sinus infection, double ear infection, mastitis, C difficile) and I came across it, so when I started feeling another ear infection coming on, I took it diligently...same thing last week...it really seems to work well. That's cool that you're getting a custom order vitamin...my mom has that in a powdered formula. It looks and tastes revolting, but maybe it beats the 6 or so pills I take each day. Although, some of them are just things I'm trying to finish off. I also decided to be brave tonight and start taking my Vitex again...I did pay for it after all, and maybe the constant nausea as a side effect will be better if I take it at night...or it will help me with my weight-loss wink1.gif

AFM: does anyone have any recommendations what to take for fatigue. Honestly, I'm so tired ALL THE TIME that I can't even picture being pregnant, which is one of the reasons I'm happy we've put off TTC till DD2 is 2. I feel like I'm preggos I'm so tired eyesroll.gif.

bearandotter 10-16-2012 09:22 PM

"Bearandotter.... COME ON DOWN!!!"

 

thats right ladies. A BFP for me on CD28. Cautiously hopefully that this will be a sticky bean....

 

In case anyone wants the secret formula: (ha ha) I think making a Drs appointment to discuss possible reasons for not conceiving (and asking for BloodWork, sorry about the funny acronym Lidamama) last week helped (my appt is booked for tomorrow), and what truly tipped my chances was going ahead and ordering the OPKs. They arrived in the mail about 4pm today, not 15 minutes before I tested and got my BFP.

 

Best wishes for a peaceful, sane, and successful journey to each of you. Hope to see all of you 'on the other side' soon.


JustJenny 10-16-2012 10:07 PM

bearandotter CONGRATS! See that Magical thinking does work, lol!  Wishing you a beautiful pregnancy and birth...dust.gif

 

Welcome coati - hope you get a bfp soon!

 

Lidamama- I did a candida cleanse a few years ago and olive leaf was a major part of getting me healthy. I completely forgot about it until you mentioned it.  It is an amazing antiviral and antibiotic in case anyone else is interested. Super for flu season!  What about adding ginseng for energy? I love maca - its totally balanced me out and given me energy. Hopefully it'll five me a bfp, lol. I'm on my second month of it....


revolting 10-17-2012 05:33 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by bearandotter View Post

"Bearandotter.... COME ON DOWN!!!"

 

thats right ladies. A BFP for me on CD28. Cautiously hopefully that this will be a sticky bean....

 

In case anyone wants the secret formula: (ha ha) I think making a Drs appointment to discuss possible reasons for not conceiving (and asking for BloodWork, sorry about the funny acronym Lidamama) last week helped (my appt is booked for tomorrow), and what truly tipped my chances was going ahead and ordering the OPKs. They arrived in the mail about 4pm today, not 15 minutes before I tested and got my BFP.

 

Best wishes for a peaceful, sane, and successful journey to each of you. Hope to see all of you 'on the other side' soon.

partytime.gif Yay! I wish you a happy, healthy pregnancy!

 

AFM: I took a test today. I got a BFP. Initially, I wondered if the line was too faint, but I'm pretty sure it's fine after looking at other BFP pictures for this type of test.. I'm praying for a healthy pregnancy and baby this time.


GISDiva 10-17-2012 07:31 AM

Yaaaay!  Congratulations BearandOtter and Revolting!

 

Dakipode, fingers crossed on the Clomid...Hello to Coati...and a big helping of zen for everyone else too.  :)

 

AFM:  Trial and error has determined that it's the prenatal vitamins are making me queasy, which they didn't do the few months previous.  I'm trying not to think about why just yet..."I'll know when I know"...9 DPO...almost there...


beingmommy 10-17-2012 07:58 AM

Congrats Bearandotter and Revolting!!!  So happy for you!  Sending sticky baby vibes!


Xerxella 10-17-2012 08:07 AM

Wow!! joy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif

Congrats Bear and Revolting!!!!! I was going to give you the name of the RPL in Chicago, but I hope you don't need her!

coati - Welcome!!! I didn't want your entrance to get lost in our good news of the day. Welcome.gif

GisDiva - The prenatals always make me queasy, so I'm no help to you there. But, good luck. Be strong. You know a test now would just confuse the issue. (Unless it won't then just go for it! thumb.gif )

beingmommy - Is that early for you? CD 11 would be early for me. But, yeah, for getting in a fortuitous bd session! May it be a lucky one!!!!

dakipode, justjenny, lidamama and beingmommy too - Well we're all about the same spot in our cycle. I thought that only happened in real life!

AFM - I had a nice long talk with dh last night. We talked about our losses and how I'm still feeling alot of pain. I know he hates to see me in pain, so I try not to dwell on it, but sometimes, it feel like I'm hiding that part of myself from him then, and I don't think that's good for anyone. It was a good talk. We also talked about our plans for moving ahead. I knew we were on the same page, but it was nice to get our details aligned. So, the every other day bd-ing starts tonight on cd 10. Good luck all.

beingmommy 10-17-2012 08:34 AM

Xerxella, back when I was able to BBT chart, I use to O anytime from CD 11-14.  And then my AF would come anywhere from 27-30 days (usually, had a CD 31 almost C32 last month). My LP has always been on the longer side too (17-19 days)  I think when O is early, AF comes earlier.    The last few months have been so weird I honestly don't know. BUT I did have that Maya Abdominal massage last week and she said it could increase fertility so maybe that jump started me?  Hoping.  I am not assuming, though, so we will try for some more BDing (though last month the plan was to do every other day and DH couldn't do it).  Yesterday I was feeling really positive that it was O when I was feeling the pinching pain. But today I am starting to wonder again.  Oh well, have to try not to obsess eyesroll.gif.   Glad you had a good talk with your DH.  A friend of mine was talking about loss recently and said loss becomes a part of you and it's hard sometimes for people to see it.  I was thinking that loss, especially m/c, eventually cannot be seen by everyone but when they don't see that part of you it's like they cannot see all of you and that feels bad.

 

Fingers crossed for you GISDiva!


dakipode 10-17-2012 08:48 AM

bearandotter and revolting: Congratulations! I'm so excited for both of you! We were due for some BFPs, hopefully there will be others from this thread joining you soon!

 

devilish: ugh! You'd think these doctors would know that's not helpful at all. I can see how they're trying to reassure you and cheer you up by saying that but it's a lousy and hollow statement. I tried vitex and it seemed to bring O a little earlier but it messed with my digestive system, haven't tried maca.

 

JustJenny: glad you're feeling better in time for BD action! I'll have to look into Olive Leaf, sounds interesting.

 

Xerxella: thanks for the show of support! I'm getting closer to the one year mark and I keep thinking about the statistics: it's gotta happen one of these times... I'm using Wondfo OPKs but no monitoring at the clinic or anything. So far this whole experience has been sort of weirdly hands off. I saw "my" doc only the first time (July), then the second visit (August) for the HSG etc. it was the other guy because "mine" was on vacation, and the nurse was the one who explained all the Clomid and IUI stuff to me, that's it. She called in my prescription and that was that. I'm not even sure if I'm supposed to call them if I get pregnant.

I understand where you're coming from with the speeding things up part. That's how I felt about getting the Clomid prescription, I wanted to speed up the process of seeing if I could even get pregnant, let alone stay pregnant... I hope things work out well for you with your new doc!

 

Lidamama: how awesome that you are so close to your grandmother that she was able to share such a painful and intimate time of her life with you.

I totally agree that all this technology can make us feel like we can conceive when we decide we want to. I also feel that for the most part technology has helped us get things done sooner, faster etc. and that maybe we forget that there are a lot of factors about conception that we can't control with technology...

I don't know of anything you can take for fatigue other than get more sleep. Are you missing anything in your nutrition? Have you recently started or stopped taking something?

 

Coati: welcome! I hope you find us a warm and supportive group. Since you're thinking of experiments you must be thinking odds as well, right?

 

beingmommy: good to see you! Whatever you need to do to stay sane. I tried staying away from the boards a while back but I think I lasted all of 4 days smile.gif I find this group in particular more helpful than others, precisely because we try to stay away from symptom spotting etc. that is so prevalent in other threads. It sounds like you did some healing work that was good for your soul. I hope that means your body is ready to receive/create new life now!

 

GISDiva: maybe BFPs, just like celebrity deaths, come in threes?

 

JustJenny, Xerxella, Lidamama, and Beingmommy: we're all close in our cycles. I was thinking about odds and I'm really not good at this: what is the chance that one of us (1 out of 5) will get a BFP this cycle if the chance for a BFP in the individual is one in twenty? Anyone want to calculate that? Or should we just keep thinking: "It's gotta be me one of these days!"

 

I realized while doing the dishes that it should read: what is the chance that this thread will get a BFP this cycle if the chance for an individual BFP is one in twenty.

 

AFM: nothing to see on the OPK yet, maybe tomorrow. Temping has been weird and I wonder, since one of the side effects of Clomid can be hot flashes, whether the medication raised my overall temp? Feeling pretty zen for now though.

 

I wish you all a mindful day filled with wonder and serenity. hippie.gif


Lidamama84 10-17-2012 10:39 AM

Congrats: bearandotter, revolting and fingers crossed for GISdiva!! joy.gif

 

JustJenny: I have heard of Candida Cleanse...I think I may have even done one 10 or so years ago...I remember it being very hard (ok, impossible) to stick to the sugar-free diet. I will have to look into the ginseng, make sure it's ok while nursing. I can't realistically get any more sleep than I already do, but maybe being more diligent with my supplements will help.

 

Dakipode: I will lessen the odds for you some more, since we are not TTCing right now, the chances are even better that you will end up with a BFP :)

It sounds like your Clomid cycle is going well. Some women find they are ok on it while others find it really messes with their mind.


pokeyac 10-17-2012 12:20 PM

Congratulations beanandotter and revolting!  I'm so happy for you both.  Sending healthy sticky vibes your way!  goodvibes.gif

 

joy.gifjoy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifenergy.gifenergy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif

joy.gifjoy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifenergy.gifenergy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif

joy.gifjoy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifenergy.gifenergy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif

joy.gifjoy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifenergy.gifenergy.gifbiggrinbounce.gifbiggrinbounce.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif


GISDiva 10-17-2012 12:23 PM

Goodness, it's amazing what a few hours can do, eh?  I discovered bright red spotting, something that seems to be my new normal a couple days before AF.  Which would also signal a short-ish luteal phase again.  I finally had a nice normal cycle last month and everything...

 

I'm still trying to be hopeful, but I've been reading up on Maca on my lunch break in the meantime.  I have been wondering about my progesterone levels, I had pretty short luteal phases after the Pill and before DS.  And since my boobs failed pretty spectacularly at making milk, and progesterone is important there too...I don't know, things are starting to add up in my head, whether it's correct or not.  And then I wonder, did we just get extremely lucky with DS?

 

Goodness, that wasn't a very hopeful, zen post was it.  Um...let's just end with this:  trekkie.gif

 

There.  I feel better.  Thanks ladies.  :) 


GISDiva 10-17-2012 12:33 PM

I had to come back and say I had this vision of you all posting virtual pitchforks and torches telling me to stop symptom spotting.  lol.gif


thecoffeebean 10-17-2012 09:09 PM

Hey all, just wanted to pop in and say I'd like to join the thread. Congrats to PokeyAC, bearandotter and revolting! joy.gif

I'll probably put off actual TTC until we are moved and settled next month, but then, maybe I won't, since I'm 9dpoish with no spotting yet. Time will tell. Anyway, I look forward to reading more from you all an getting to know you this coming month.

beingmommy 10-17-2012 09:29 PM

Coffee! hug2.gif  I was thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were. Sending a huge pile of good vibes and hope for you!


pokeyac 10-18-2012 10:00 AM

Thank you coffeebean!  I was so sorry to hear about your latest loss.  I have faith that it will happen for you.  This is a great group of women.  I'm sure you will enjoy being here very much.


dakipode 10-18-2012 08:15 PM

coffeebean, welcome! I look forward to getting to know you too!



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