Bajingo Juice can bring BFP presents this Christmas Season - TTC#1 in our 30s - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 135 Old 12-10-2012, 05:15 PM
 
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Lilachug2.gif  hug2.gif Extra hugs... I'm sorry af is on her way. Of course I want everybody to have bfp's but I'm really rooting for yours each cycle. I guess its that we've been trying for so long and basically the same amount of time.  How are you coping with it all?  I swing wildly from positive to despair it seems like. 

 

 

thebyr- wave.gif hope you caught your rainbow egg this cycle! 

 

dakipode-  I've missed you and have been thinking of you often. I am glad your on your way to healing.

 

bailymarie- Thanks for the encouragement. I'm feeling a little nervous tonight since tomorrow's the appt. Hoping all goes well!


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#32 of 135 Old 12-10-2012, 08:57 PM
 
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Thank you JustJenny! I do hope I catch it too.

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#33 of 135 Old 12-11-2012, 04:06 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thebyr, I am glad you are back in the TTC game after your loss and your surgery. I remember your avatar name but I wasn't aware that you lost your little one. Would you like me to put 9/11 or 12/12 as your TTC start date?

dakipode, I hope that you will be able to try again soon.  Christmas presents in March or April? I would actually prefer that sometimes to all the hustle and bustle this time of year.

JustJenny, yeah, that swing each month from hope to despair some months is worse than others. I know DH and I are saving money toward IVF and that gives me hope but then there is the fear that  that procedure will be painful with lots of needles that really gets me. Sunday night someone read the story of Jonathan Toomey (sp?) where a wood carver lost his wife and son to some illness, became bitter and reclusive, and then is brought out of his shell by the loving attention of a widow and her son.  I was in tears thinking about all the people I know who have lost little ones and how much each of us wants a little one to hold and love. Makes me tear up just thinking about it.

 

AFM, low temp again, just waiting for AF to appear.


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#34 of 135 Old 12-11-2012, 06:50 AM
 
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Thanks you lilac. I recognized you too. *hugs*
Good question, hmmmm. Lets just start fresh and say 12/12.

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#35 of 135 Old 12-11-2012, 05:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Okay Thebyr, I put 12/12 as your TTC start date. I hope good things happen for you soon after all your challenges over the last year.

 

AFM, spotting this afternoon. Probably full AF tomorrow.


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#36 of 135 Old 12-11-2012, 08:21 PM
 
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Bailey-- Hope your trip goes OK. We miss ovulation all. the. time. I am sure that I would be pregnant by now, or even have a living baby, if we BD'd more often. I feel your pain.

 

Library Girl--Sorry to hear about AF. I hope this stressful season stays fairly headache-free. I don't know if I mentioned that I have spent most of my working life as a library paraprofessional and just learned today that I will be working part-time in a library for the next few months. Super excited to be back in that environment after a few years away. As you probably know, the work is not exactly plentiful in libraries right now.

 

Lilac--Gah!! I love seeing you in these forums but am so sorry to continue seeing you here at the same time. Keep your eyes on the prize! I am sure once the procedure is actually happening you will be emotionally ready for it.

 

Hermesgoddess--Alright!!! Congratulations!

 

Doula--Thinking of you... Sorry this was not your month.

 

Thebyr-- Best of luck... That sounds like a difficult process, both physically and emotionally.

 

Dakipode--My doctor said there was no biological reason to prevent pregnancy after a loss-- it's just that some people need time to deal with their feelings and some doctors prefer that people have regular cycles before trying again so they can track things. Just one doctor's opinion.

 

AFM-- housekeeping first. I might be 32 now blush.gif !! And haven't mentioned anything for a while.

 

We are coming up on the lost baby's due date and I am starting to really have feelings. The months and cycles are dragging on. I am pretty sure we missed my fertile window again. AF is due in a few days and I am fairly sure it will come like clockwork again.

 

My sister and mom, bless-their-hearts meddlers that they are, think that I should push DH into investigating his low-ish sex drive. I am SO against this. He knows that his preferences are causing the TTC process to take longer and he can act on it should he feel compelled and/or able. But to me something feels super yucky about pushing someone into having sex in any form. We have tried to BD while I am ovulating and the pressure means he can't finish My real-world friends don't have an opinion either way; I just know how I feel and find my mom and sister's opinions mildly annoying. I got on a forum I frequent to complain about how they are pressuring me to pressure my husband to BD more often. To my surprise and dismay I got an unexpected onslaught of people who all thought that my husband was being disrespectful of the TTC process by not troubleshooting his sex drive. He still likes to get together once a week or so, so we're not talking huge dry spells. But it does mean that we miss about every other cycle, and when we do hit the ovulation window we only BD once. I am on this website all the time and people don't usually talk like that and it made me wonder if I need a wakeup call. Is it possible that DH is really being disrespectful towards me? He has hardly been emotionally involved in this process, but many older women who I respect have told me over and over again that men tend to only see the first pregnancy as real only once the baby is in their arms. I didn't really have high expectations for him to be super into the process because of that. Am I just crazy?


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#37 of 135 Old 12-11-2012, 09:42 PM
 
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TeamViddy: I think it depends on the guy. Some men are as eager as their wives/partners to become parents and others aren't. In a relationship you make decisions together, and whether you explicitly agreed on respecting your DH's limited sex drive or not, that is your current scenario. If you want to change it you could bring it up and see where he stands on shifting a bit more towards your preferences... Clarifying expectations and intentions is hard but necessary.


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#38 of 135 Old 12-12-2012, 07:11 AM
 
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Thanks Dakipode... We ended up talking about it last night. He complained that he doesn't know which day I am ovulating until it happens. I can't disagree with that! We don't really have any next steps except to try again to note in our shared calendar that we should get together more often during a certain time.


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#39 of 135 Old 12-12-2012, 11:25 AM
 
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Viddy - I agree with the no pushing the sex thing.  It just feels wrong to me to force anything on someone who doesn't want to. But- maybe a gentle nudge- not a push, into checking out his hormones would be beneficial for his health, not just ttc. Has your dh had his testosterone checked? It is very important for his long term health and well being that it is corrected if its out of whack. Its a simple blood test that his GP can order. If it is low - which could be the case since his libido is low- there are herbs to try. My dh has this problem and takes tribulus for it. He has felt MUCH better overall. His energy is higher and he's less cranky. Just a thought smile.gif


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#40 of 135 Old 12-12-2012, 12:47 PM
 
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Thank you TeamViddy! Glad to see familiar folks - even though that means we've been around a while. At least it's good company. Yay for your new PT job. I've worked at a bookstore and in a Library and I loved them both. I don't really have great advice about your situation except to say that you know your hubby better than anyone else.. great advice someone once told me (long before I was married) was that you should NEVER let the opinions of others enter into your marriage. I know mothers and sisters often think they are doing the right thing by offering their opinions about our lives - but it's really just none of their business. I can TOTALLY see how it would be annoying after a while too. I do like the forums because you can sort of be anonymous when you ask questions about your circumstances - but still people offer their opinions like they are the end all/be all. I think you're right to be against pressuring him...and since only you (at least they aren't saying anything to your hubby) can hear your mom and sister - tell them "thanks for the advice, I'll consider it." Hopefully that encourages them to leave it alone. I do agree with JustJenny though - he may need to be checked out for health reasons. You can't force someone to do something they don't want to do - but after your convo with him, it doesn't sound like he is really opposed to hitting your O date.. just sounds like he's not quite sure when it is. Have you tried using an OPK? That might help figure out a range and if you explain it to him - he might be able to work with a window of a few days better than with a whole cycle. I really hope you catch that eggy!


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#41 of 135 Old 12-12-2012, 03:51 PM
 
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Thebyr-- I love MDC because people don't offer opinions in that way. My sister gets really into The Bump and The Nest and WOW-- people offer all kinds of crazy end all/be all advice there. Those ladies really know what's right for other people :). People on this website tend to be respectful and reflective and your post is a perfect example of that. Thanks :)


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#42 of 135 Old 12-13-2012, 06:47 AM
 
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TeamViddy - I'm spoiled because I mostly hang out here! I hope you get a resolution or a BFP REALLY soon! hug2.gif

 

AFM - Not much... horrible cold so I googled musinex to see if it would throw off my O date or affect pregnancy and saw a bunch of posts about women taking it to get help with pregnancy. The ladies on another board were lovely enough to enlighten me with more facts. WHO KNEW? I had no idea. I always take it for colds - never thought it could potentially help with getting the spermy to the eggy. lol

I ovulate late next week though, and I doubt I'll still be on it by then.. but it might be something interesting to keep in mind if I don't quite catch the egg the first few months of TTC.


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#43 of 135 Old 12-13-2012, 10:07 AM
 
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Thebyr: I tried it a couple of months ago and it didn't seem to do much for my EWCM production. It was an experiment and I didn't repeat it. Lately I've been taking royal jelly. Mostly I take these things as a placebo/superstition. I like to think it's helping and that I'm doing "extra" things to help TTC.


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#44 of 135 Old 12-13-2012, 11:20 AM
 
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Good point! 


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#45 of 135 Old 12-13-2012, 05:07 PM
 
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Dakipode: Definitely heard that Royal Jelly can be good for your body in general. Can't hurt!
 


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#46 of 135 Old 12-13-2012, 05:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What is the big deal with royal jelly? I haven't heard of using for anything particular.  I have heard about mucinex.  Tried it a few times but my issue is more that EWCM lasts for so long, not that I don't have enough.

 

TeamViddy, I am so glad I ditched the Nest and the Bump.  I totally don't fit in with those kind of people.

 

AFM, AF is kicking my butt.  Yesterday I was hardly able to stand up and continue teaching because of cramps. Ugh.  I just want to be pregnant.  I keep thinking just 6 more months and then we will have the money for our IVF and I will have two months of summer vacation to go through the IVF procedures without worrying about teaching at the same time.


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#47 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 07:42 AM
 
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Lilac - sometimes I have periods like that too... In fact, since my surgery - my periods hurt MORE.. even though many women get relief after fibroid removal. But I've noticed that my periods are much more like when I was younger (in high school) - clotty with lots of cramping and mild nausea. I feel for your pain - especially having to be in front of students ALLLLLL day!!! Yikes.

 

 

I have an Ovulation question. So, I know my cycle fluctuates between 27-32 days. I've been tracking my cycles for about 3 years. This is the first time I've tracked my O date though. Last month, according to my OPK - I O'd on CD18. I've been reading that your O date can fluctuate and that's most likely the reason for cycle fluctuation. For the ladies that have been tracking your O dates - have they fluctuated?


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#48 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 07:55 AM
 
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Folks, the universe is challenging me today. My sister-in-law had three very planned babies and then got pregnant with her fourth accidentally this summer. I am super happy for her and she is a fantastic mother. Although I never had a twinge of jealousy, I did have difficult feelings when she announced the birth to my husband's grandma and I was just sitting there with one loss and nothing else to show from a year trying. Now my sister is accidentally pregnant with her third after two very planned pregnancies. She just found out today. My period is due today; my breasts were deflated this morning the way they always are the day my period starts. Again, not a twinge of jealousy, but I am struggling with feelings of failure. This is the 17th cycle. I am tired.


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#49 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 07:59 AM
 
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I get it TeamViddy. When I tell you that ALL of my friends are preggers now - I mean ALL of them. Some of my really good friends either just had babies or are due between now and March. I have  11 friends in that category. And I'm not jealous of them at all... but it doesn't make me feel good about my situation to be around all these women who have babies or are preggers - period. SO hug2.gif to you - cause it's not easy to be surrounded by something you want so badly and for it to be JUST out of reach. I really hope you get your BFP soon!!!


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#50 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 09:47 AM
 
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I swear an announcement always happens right when AF comes. Its like thank you so much universe for handing me the information when I'm extra emotional on a super emotional subject.  I'm sorry your so tired. Ttc really does take its toll. Perhaps a break might help? I should take my own advice,lol. I'm only a few cycles ahead of you and I'm exhausted too. 


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#51 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 10:33 AM
 
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Lilac: I read that royal jelly is packed with all sorts of good stuff since it is the super concentrated food the bees feed their queen and all she does her whole life is lay eggs. So what's good for the bees must be good for me... winky.gif

Sorry you're having a sucky period. I've found over the years that if I keep up my fiber intake that tends to help alleviate the cramps, maybe something to experiment with?

 

Thebyr: My O date as well as my LP are variable, that's from 8 months worth of data. Feel free to ask more questions.

 

TeamViddy and JustJenny: "I'm tired." has been my slogan all year! Every couple of weeks I find myself saying: "I need a vacation." and really I need a mental break but I don't even know from what. 2012 hasn't been a great year for me, even before November. My business has suffered from lack of attention and at home things are ok, I would even say good, but for some reason I still feel drained. I think I've been feeling like I'm spinning my wheels and not going anywhere and that's frustrating. Because on the one hand I want to tell myself to work harder so I can get going again but the other part of me says I worked hard in 2011 and didn't get to reward myself so what's the point.

Anyway, I feel you both. All I know is I need something different in 2013.


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#52 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 12:19 PM
 
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Thanks Dakipode. I never paid that much attention to my O date - just the length of my cycle. So when I used a digi OPK last month - I was surprised that I O'd on CD18 - but it all made sense when I had a 32 day cycle. So now - I'm just trying to catch my O date this month.. so I started testing back on CD10 - just in case. I thought I would see a pattern when looking back the last few months - but there isn't one - long one month, short another. In the last 8 months - were the range of your O dates pretty close or did they vary anywhere in that 11-21 day range?

 

Yeah - I say "I'm tired" at least once a week.. and I almost always mean emotionally.

 

And this shooting didn't make it any better. I'm really praying for the families of those poor babies.


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#53 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 02:03 PM
 
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Alright, so it's settled. 2013 is the year of turning your wheels and covering some serious mileage.

 

There are SO MANY things happening in my life that involve the turning of wheels and not going anywhere. Career, finances, education, family life... What keeps my head above water is remembering that there are times in our lives when things need to hibernate, gain energy, accumulate, etc. before they come to fruition. It's wondering when/if they will come to fruition that wears me out. That's the rub.
 


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#54 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 06:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thebyr, for the last year, since I have been on thyroid meds, my O date has varied from 15 to 22 days with the majority of them being on CD 19. My cycle lengths have varied from 27 to 34 days. My LP is usually 12 to 13 days.

 

Thebyr, my maternal maternal great grandmother had fibroid tumors and that is why she only had one child - my maternal grandmother. My maternal grandmother had four kids but ended up having a hysterectomy because of fibroid tumors. My mom had 7 kids (and 1 miscarriage) and I always figured it would be easy for me to get pregnant. It does always seem that pregnancy announcements come when my AF does.  I am tired too because waiting and waiting is hard.

 

So now for my amazing turn of events.  I work for a Christian school as a teacher.  On Monday night I was talking with my superintendent and principal about some school related issues. My principal is a man and just moved here this year. The superintendent has known me from my college days when she was a professor at my college. The principal stepped out and I shared very quickly with the superintendent that my DH and I were going to have to go through IVF in order to get pregnant and that it was influencing my decision whether to continue employment at my school next year.  My principal came back in and I let the conversation end quickly. We finished our conversation with the three of us and then we departed.  My superintendent asked to speak with my privately in my classroom. She asked if finances were influencing our IVF journey. I said they were and that we had a 1/3 of the money saved for the procedure. She told me that from time to time there are some individuals that donate to special causes in our school system and she asked my permission to ask for the remaining money that my DH and I needed to go through with our IVF. I told her that was okay.

 

On Thursday night, she called me and said that she had asked the finance committee and that they approved giving me two bonus pay checks one in December and one in January or February to cover what out of pocket expenses my DH and I will have for IVF.  I was in tears of happiness.  DH and I are going to make an appointment to figure out exactly when we will go through with the procedures - either March or June - and exactly what time commitments we are talking about - when I have to go in to get ultrasounds done as follicles grow, then egg retrievel, fertilization, and then egg transfer. Now we can concentrate our money on paying off some more debts so I can stay home with our kids for a few years when they are little. I have to say it is the best Christmas present I could have gotten that wasn't a BFP.

 

I just have to remember - don't give up, stay positive, keep the faith that the best is yet to come! I hope each of us gets our BFP soon and that more will follow us!


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Now THAT is AWESOME lilac!!!!!!! Thanks for the info too.. But I'm just so happy for you right now.

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#56 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 06:40 PM
 
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Lilac - Wow!!! What a GIFT. Amazing. I am so happy for you and your dh. I wish you both a easy journey from here out. joy.gif

 

jumpers.gifjumpers.gifjumpers.gifjumpers.gifjumpers.gif


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#57 of 135 Old 12-14-2012, 08:20 PM
 
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Lilac: I'm so happy for you. It's great to hear that there are people out there who want to support you in your journey! It's another step forward for you and I'd love to see you succeed next year!

 

Thebyr: I ovulate late, anywhere from CD18-28 and my LP has varied from 8-13 days. Overall cycle lengths have been anywhere from 41 to 28 days. I'm in the same boat as you, there doesn't seem to be a predictable pattern. My CM reading is so-so but my temp shift is always very clear so that usually confirms O for me. My cervical signs are mixed so I only look for height, that seems to be the one that's consistent with the other signs, the firmness and openness of my cervix is all over the place... Sorry if that's more than you needed to know.


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#58 of 135 Old 12-15-2012, 07:22 AM
 
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Lilac!!!! What a fantastic gift!! I am SO happy for you-- that is amazing. You really have a special community around you.


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#59 of 135 Old 12-15-2012, 10:21 AM
 
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Thank you dakipode, that's exactly what I needed to know.

Mommy to an amazing rainbow1284.gif baby boy 8.27.13
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#60 of 135 Old 12-17-2012, 06:14 AM
 
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Hey, how was everyones weekend?


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