, that is fantastic news. I hope it is smooth sailing from here for you.
Litmama, I am gluten intolerant and have been off it for a few years now. The funny thing is I seem to be able to tolerate it better when pregnant. I have no idea why. If I have it I don't have an immediate reaction, but I will feel uncomfortable, tired and eventually have a very upset stomach (nausea and diarreah).It is unpleasant. For years I battled with bloating and tummy upsets, which all resolved after giving up gluten, and then going paleo and giving up most grains (I occasionally have rice). I feel so much better all round.
After my second miscarriage I had loads of blood tests and learned that I have a raised ANA, which essentially means there is a high possibility that I either have an autoimmune disease,or I will get one. I do wonder if I am celiac (which is autoimmune), because although I had an inconclusive blood test, I didn't have the biopsy, which is the real way to find out. I did have a raised count of antibodies, but not high enough apparently. I read that book by Dr De Beer and he suggested that even small intolerances,particularly to gluten, can cause issues for miscarriage, so I am staying away from it.
However, I think that if it is important to you to enjoy your grandmother's recipes, then you should have the occasional birthday cake.
I would like to hear more about the anti-histamine protocol too. I often have allergic hives (I can't pinpoint why) and wonder if my body is rejecting fertilized eggs too ( believe it produces histamine to do this?I am vague on the details).
I have many symptoms during many of my tww's. I have been pregnant 9 times (5 healthy babies) and I think I have a good idea of when I am pregnant, so my theory is that we are hitting the egg most months, but the quality of the eggs (or embies) is poor and they don't implant. Although many people say you can't have symptoms until implantation I have read that the fertilized egg gives off a hormone that can give you symptoms. I wonder if my body is rejecting fertilized eggs because of allergies or intolerances, but my gut instinct tells me it is just the age of my eggs, and that if I keep trying I might chance upon a healthy one. That is why, although I have periods where I can't be bothered and want to give up all the hard work, I keep on taking supplements, eating well, exercising and doing acupuncture. Until I stop having AF, there is still a chance.
At my last visit to my TCM lady, she commented that my energies were the best I have ever had (perhaps because I'd just returned from a relaxing 2 week vacation). Although she will never say "I think you will get pregnant", she seems to hint that there is still a good chance it can happen.
Stevi, it is nice to see you on the thread. How are you? Where are you on your ttc journey. LAst time I saw you on the thread you were giving up. Are you looking into adoption?
Good luck to everyone
Me again...I knew it was likely too good to be true :-( I am just over 7 weeks now and I have started to spot...it is only a small amount, but 2 of my M/C started exactly the same way. I tried not to get my hopes up too much, but it is amazing how quickly one's head and heart embrace a new pregnancy.
Caritasrainbow - I can only imagine the relief you are feeling...still early days, but that is a great increase.
Litmama- I have had more than my fair share of getting pregnant over 40...but only one success for all of that. So very grateful for our precious boy, it was just so nice to think we might actually have luck in giving him a little brother or sister...it is hard knowing this may very well have been our last chance. Not giving up yet though...will keep hoping and trying as long as it is realistic to do so. So very sorry for your current loss, wishing you best of luck in adding your desired addition to your family.
Sad as I feel right now, I look at my little boy's smile, as we get ready for bed...and I know all is right with my world, even with what is currently happening.
Caritasrainbow, Thanks for the update! That is great news!
Halifax, I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'm hoping this is just regular early pregnancy spotting, and will resolve. But it sounds like you feel in your heart that it's over? Thank you for the kind words. I'm sending a ((( hug ))) back your way. I love what you say about your little boy helping you know everything is okay. That's how my DD helps me feel, too.
Caritasrainbow, you see, I knew there was a reason I was congratulating you! That is wonderful news.
Gumbossom and Stevi and Mamasee and everyone else who helped me with thoughts on gluten... thank you. My feeling is I'm not convinced gluten is a toxin to everyone, but since I have an autoimmune disease, I know it could be for me. A nutritionist I know recommended the Alcat test for food sensitivities, perhaps I'll try that. I'd just like to know definitively what I'm sensitive to and what I'm okay with, so I can proceed from information rather than fear. I'm really used to eating GF now, and it doesn't feel so onerous... but a slice of my daughter's birthday cake once a year seems reasonable, too!
On the antihistamine protocol (pepcid and claritin)... this is not for general fertility, but only if you know you have autoimmune fertility issues. It you don't have autoimmune issues, it could be harmful, as implantation requires a certain amount of inflammation. You only want to tamper with inflammation if you know that you have too much of it. But that being said, the protocol works by inhibiting two different types of histamines... claritin takes care of one type, and pepcid (despite being mainly an antacid) takes care of the other type. Yes, an implanting embryo can cause your body to react by creating histamines, which could cause your body to reject the embryo. So, the protocol is to take one 24-hour claritin per day after ovulation, and two maximum-strength pepcids (20 mg) per day after ovulation, one in the AM and one in the PM so you have a steady supply of it in your bloodstream. You can substitute benadryl for the claritin if you prefer. The actual cocktail used by IVF clinics also includes 20mg of prednisone per day (Rx). Of course, I was on this protocol (plus heparin and neupogen and intralipids) for this IVF cycle and it did not protect me from this loss, so it's not a magic bullet. Bummer.
I am so sorry for you two that are dealing with current losses, or impending losses. I think I just numbed myself completely for the entire month of mine. I mainly just centered myself on research to start over as soon as I could. All I really did was add a few vitamins to my regimen. I'd noticed that my EWCM was not very thick, not very much, and didn't last very long. All the vitamins did was make it thicker and more copius. It still only lasted for a day, and I didn't bd that day anyway so...
I got a call from the nurse. The dr said the numbers wrong. My last beta was 1997, not 19097. Still within range and doubling as it should. He did not call for more betas, just a message to find an OB. Yesterday I was sort of crampy all day and very worried, but today I am better. I do not feel out of the woods just yet, but I do feel in my heart that this will have a good outcome.
I did find a pretty active over 40s board over at Baby Center. It does seem like most of the moms there did not TTC, but ended up there accidentally, but whatever, they are all over 40 and pregnant. If you want more info or can't find it, let me know.
Now that I have my internet access again, perhaps I will create a board here. As I am still SO early, only 6 weeks lmp tomorrow, I almost feel like it might be jumping the gun a bit to do that just yet. I guess after a mc, it is just harder to quite grasp the reality of the current situation. I still feel like I need to be very careful. I have had a couple of vanilla root beers, caffeinated, and I really feel horrible guilt afterwards and just sort of wait in fear for something awful to happen.
It would be nice to have a more "mothering" type board though. I am an extended nurser (daughter is nearly 2.5), cloth diapering. non circing, non vaxing, mom and it'd be nice to have more contact with the same. Although it truly is nice to just be able to "talk" with other moms my age. You know even though you hear about us all over the news, the truth is that we are scarce and people really do treat us differently.
Plus my dh hasn't said one word about this pregnancy since he got angry when I told him. He knows nothing of the anxiety I dealt with the betas, nor the day of painful cramping. I feel pretty alone. In fact, last weekend he suggested I get a Rockstar. Like maybe he forgot I am pregnant? Weirdness.
I had my last four children at home unassisted with unassited pregnancies as well. After my mc in May, I am wondering if perhaps this time around it might not be time to hire a professional. I'm thinking MW, not OB. At any rate, it'd be nice to find a place to discuss things like birth options. I don't feel this is the right board. But I also don't feel "ready" to leave this board yet.
I don't know much about gluten free other than my niece has celiac and it has been suggested to me that my sn son may have a gluten intolerence. I had him tested for celiac, but I guess that wouldn't show an allergy...
HUGS to every single one of you for every single thing you are going through.
I don't feel out of the woods yet, but have high hopes. of course.
Going to be brief with this post, sorry for the lack of personal replies:
Light bleeding has started, guess I am no longer in limbo...and ironically I just got a call from midwife program for my first appt...I had so wanted a midwife before but the waitlist was always too long here where I live...might know I would get accepted this time and with such perfect timing. Xander is asleep in my arms, I feel sad, no two ways about it, but this loss truly is different than all my others.... as I look at him my heart is so full of love and gratitude for finally having luck in having him.
Halifax40, I am so, so sorry for what you are going through. I know how quickly one can become attached to a new pregnancy, or even the idea of one. I'm very glad, though, that you have the joy of your beautiful boy in your arms. I find that there are very few things that I cannot endure if I can gaze at my gorgeous son. Hugs to you.
LitMama... Thank you for the info. I've developed allergies, and had always avoided antihistamines while TTC. Now I wish I had taken them! :)
As for me, I am not trying to conceive anymore. (Though I did let a donor convince me to try last cycle. Bad idea.) I do keep up though, as the dream of being a parent is a very tough one to give up on. I am looking into dating, hoping to find someone to fill the void from being childless. And, I do still hope to become a parent of some kind in the future, but I know that I cannot continue to let my happiness hinge on that slim possibility.
Halifax. I am so sorry. ((hugs))
Well that was fast...called my doctor today just to update her and she got me in and made arrangements at hospital for U/S...it confirmed that things had stopped developing. Got home after the U/S and m/c happened right away, guess my body was waiting for confirmation. Thanks for the support everyone!
Stevi - I am so sorry to hear this, but I understand how difficult it can be when so much of one's life gets focused on something that may or may not happen...hoping you find much happiness in your new path and that your hope is somehow fulfilled down the line.
I'm so sorry, Halifax.
It took my body what felt like forever to begin this m/c, days after I saw my already low betas were declining. Yesterday was the worst of it physically and I felt some relief, in both body and mind, after that. My DD was with me and I was so grateful for that (she wasn't aware of what was going on, but just having her close by was so comforting). Going through the IVF process... where I got to actually see my embryos and keep a picture of them by my bed... was definitely an emotional investment, and I'm grieving the loss of these two more than many of the others.
Sending us both love, courage and strength to get through this. And love, courage and strength to everyone else, too
Litmama, I am so sorry you are going through this. Hugs and sympathy to you.
Thank you, MamadeRumi, and everyone else too for your support.
MamadeR... I know you will understand this part... ugh! I can't believe fall semester is beginning. My heart is SO not in teaching right now, not to mention all the faculty schmooze-fests and meetings. None of it feels like it matters. Yet, I have to remind myself that I do love teaching and connecting with my students and hopefully that act of helping and being of service to others will bring me out of this funk. BTW, are you a Rumi scholar? We had Rumi readings at our wedding...
Oh I am soooo there with you Litmama. I am just coming back from a semester of sabbatical, and it would be one thing if I could go straight into teaching, but of course there are the endless meetings to tell us the same things they've told us in previous years . . . and of course it is all made more difficult by the fact that I'd really hoped to be on maternity leave this semester, or that I'd be telling my dept. chair that I'd be on it in the Spring, but no.
No, I'm not a Rumi scholar, but we also had Rumi readings at our wedding, and Rumi is a large part of the reason why my DH and I ever had a first date (long story).
I can't believe I have to have myself and a small person ready to go to school tomorrow. (He'll go to preschool at my University). Neither of us is ready right now. I'd better go try to get us ready. Hope you are hanging in there.
ETA: I don't mean to complain, though. I am lucky to have a job I love, and after years of trying, hoping, waiting, I realize that I am incredibly lucky to have that little person to get ready for school tomorrow.
I am sorry to hear that things are going this way for you caritasrainbow. I know how awful the loss of a baby is, no matter how early in the pregnancy. After my second miscarriage I had every test under the sun done and apart from finding a marginal vitamin D level, DHEA a little low and a positive ANCA (which indicates an autoimmune condition, unknown to me at this stage) we really couldn't find a definitive reason. Both my embryos were tested and my first had trisomy13, so he had no chance at life and the other one, though we ruled out trisomy 13,18 1nd 21, we couldn't find out whether it was another trisomy as the test hadn't been done properly.
Back then I was desperate to find a cause that wasn't age related. I read many books on the subject and at one point even blamed the fact that I am a little overweight. Now I feel very differently. I am pretty sure it is age related and there's very little we can do.
As Taichimom has said, avoiding toxins,drugs,eat healthily, take supplements. Short of IVF and selection of healthy embryos, there's not much we can do. It is to me both a source of frustration and a source of peace: there really isn't anything I could have changed (short of ttc ten years ago) to make sure I had a healthy THB.
It is a risk we (as over 40's ttc women) have to take for that chance in a million(actually the odds are much better than that) that we will carry a healthy baby to term.
Despite my low chances of conceiving at my ripe old age, I am having a few symptoms which has me feeling a teensy bit hopeful. But it does happen in many cycles that aren't successful, so I will try not to get too hopeful. I am about 6dpo, so it is early days yet.
CaritasRainbow, I am so sorry you are going through this.
Chichimama, how are you? We haven't heard from you for a while, and I'm wondering if things are going well. I hope so. Still sending sticky dust your way.
So very sorry you are going through this. My heart goes out to you.
If you are very clear that you want to encourage the bleeding to begin, the things I have learned to do are high doses of vitamin C, and Black Cohosh and Blue Cohosh. I don't have the specifics right now - we are in the process of moving too.
Does anyone have more info. to help with doses? I know you don't want to take these herbs if the pregnancy will continue (if you don't have d & c as a back up plan).
I know that when I learned that my pregnancy was a blighted ovum and had started spotting, I started with the vit. c and cohoshes and it worked pretty fast and the bleeding was heavy, heavy and all day and it was exhausting, but it worked.
Sounds like you are choosing a good approach to wait and see before doing anything to encourage the mc. So hard to wait and not know. Have you the option to see another doctor or midwife for a second opinion on the medical condition of you and the pregnancy?
Caritasrainbow, what a difficult time for you. It must be very hard to be on bed rest when the situation is so tentative, being unsure and waiting is just so difficult. And I know how frustrating it is to try to look after a family when you are on bed rest. Do you have anyone who could support you - perhaps unpack a few boxes for you?
I think you are taking the right approach- to wait and see. When will you have another scan? It is difficult to know what to do without another scan isn't it? ((hugs))
Well, I am at that part of the cycle where hope escapes and disappointment takes it place. I am 11 dpo and my temperature is falling and test is clearly negative.
I am tired,tired,tired of ttc after all these years, but for the life of me can't stop yet
I had acupuncture the other day and my practitioner says in TCM a woman is considered fertile (if she has a cycle) until she is 49. So I guess there's still a minute chance that I could eventually have a take home baby. At least I will know I gave it a damned good chance.
@mamasee- I'm not sure why I would want to see another midwife or dr? I saw the one dr in the ER, got his opinion as well as the report from the US tech. He did not appear to want to be the bearer of bad news, so he just said only time will tell. The tech report was pretty straight forward, had no opinions. I didn't realize the reality of the situation until I got home and started googling things. Then when I saw my new OB two days later, she was a bit more realistic, as was the US tech at her office. They were not unkind, but niether did they sugar coat anything. So, I don't really feel another opinion is necessary. I think it's just a matter of time.