The Saner TTC-Thunder Moon - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 12:20 PM
 
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Argh mountain mama that's awful! I'm TTC #1 and I thought periods got better after kids not worse :-( oh well. I will keep on trying. Sorry to hear that yours are so bad and fingers crossed for the vitex :-)
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#62 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 01:09 PM
 
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Thanks Oxford!

Hoping- so sorry...hope your hubby will be fine and no damage to his important parts. Fx'd that his tests show nothing harmful. Thank him (and you) for the sacrifices made for freedom! So many people have suffered.....I pray that the stuff he was exposed to causes no harm. Hugs!!
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#63 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 03:45 PM
 
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Thank you Wengrin he just left this norning to go away again so I need to catch him here in Australia so he can get tested. I know I'm lucky to have 2 beautiful kids but really wanted bub number 3, both of the others were born before those Afghanistan deployments though. There are a few people stepping forward now saying that these things (sorry not very technical smile.gif ) may be linked to different cancers and so on and as he is infantry he carried one on a daily basis. I just hope and pray all will be fine.
On a lighter note I hope everyone is having luck with their BFPs and really hope this is all of our months!!!!! I am CD 3 but really need to ovulate early or late so DH is here to catch it smile.gif So is it really better to temp or use OPKs or both...sorry I'm fairly new to this wink1.gif
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#64 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 03:50 PM
 
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Oh and I always had horrendous af but after kids they eventually settled, I hope this happens for you guys too. Always felt like such a freak buying sanitary products that resembled surfboards, lol and even then I had to change so frequently I spent most of my life in the bathroom smile.gif
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#65 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 04:32 PM
 
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Oxford - that is so funny, I've always thought of those heavy painful periods as a good spring clean too wink1.gif here's hoping we are right! Btw if everyone agrees I think you should be the new thread lady... You are always here to say wonderful supportive things to everyone, and I think you'd be great (it's not a huge amount of work, so shouldn't be a pain) what do you think?
Mountain - hugs on your AF issues, how long have you been taking vitex? I'm on day 4 do not long yet... Apparently it can take 3 weeks to 3 months depending on the cycle before everything is regulated.
Hoping where in Aus are you? We have such an international thread going - I'm in Brisbane, Aus. Ladies for the record remind us where you're from smile.gif
Wengrin - welcome and wishing you a short stay!
Mamablue - how was the aftermath, much pain? I'm hoping you are on track - I feel like it's time for us long timers to get our bfp's and proceed on the journey! It's now been nine months and eight cycles for me...
Fx for all you ladies, lets break the thread by all going bfp this month (well next moon really lol)
Afm - Oxford I am back on the ttc train this month, have started vitex, am feeding dh anything that is zinc rich, and maybe adding the odd drop to things (zinc lol) fx this month he works!

me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
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#66 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 05:48 PM
 
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Chuord. I have taken vitex for about a month now, and if I predicted right, I am about 1 week away from AF. I hope its not too terrible, but it can take about 3 months to fully work.


Me(33), Mama to a crazy DD (6), Wife to a wonderful mountain man(32) BF my babe for 2 years
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#67 of 677 Old 08-04-2013, 07:20 PM
 
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Hi Chuord I am in Brisbane too! Just bought a bottle of Vitex as well, thought I'd jump on the band wagon and add to the vitamin list;-)
My god I thought this baby making thing was supposed to be fun! Hugs to you all but must do housework before going to work greensad.gif
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#68 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 12:19 AM
 
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Morning!

Hi chuord, nice to hear you are back with us. I think it is definitely your turn for the BFP this month! I hope your month off will help your body relax and be ready. I'm not sure I can start threads as I write from my phone and I'm travelling for 4 weeks from next week so I may not be here at the right time. I suggest whoever is online around the turn over date starts a new thread and posts on here that there is a new one.

Vitex- Is that to make your cycle more regular?

Last working week before holiday for me!! Yay!!
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#69 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 03:07 AM
 
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Hoping - lol what are the odds, Brisbane!
Mountain - fx it makes a difference for you this AF! Oxford, it's been proven to help balance the hormone levels - so it will do different stuff for different people depending on the issue, I figured it can't hurt right, lol just in case.
I totally get it re the thread...

me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
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#70 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 10:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Skimming through the threads I'm seeing quite a bit of early testing and lots of "hand wringing" over all this TTC business and well ladies, that's just not sane!! 

I'd like to propose a 2-part challenge to each of you. If we're going to keep calling this thread the SANER TTC Thread then we need to hold ourselves more accountable to creating that in our own lives & supporting that commitment in each other.

So the first part of the challenge is to put off testing until the day before AF is due. None of the ladies that have graduated from this thread found out any sooner. 

Part 2 of the challenge is to talk more here about what you're doing in your own life to keep sane. We need to do more to refill our cups so the stress of TTC doesn't negatively effect what we're trying to accomplish, and think less about TTC. I'd love to see you ask others what they've been doing to keep sane too. It helps remind us of what we need to be doing plus you sharing what you do will inspire others.

The law of attraction tells us that which we think most about is what we manifest in our lives so if all we're thinking about is how hard it is to conceive a baby that's what we'll get more of-difficulty TTC.
So my sanity is being saved by this new business I'm pouring myself into as I said before.
What are you doing? GO! 


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#71 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 11:25 AM
 
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prescott - well, that's right in line with the post I've been writing and not posting for the past week!

 

I didn't take a pregnancy test at all this past cycle. That's one reason I'm continuing to chart - helps keep me realistic.

 

I'm debating what to do with this whole TTC thing. I feel like my life has been on hold since we decided we wanted another. I haven't done much in the way of active job searching because I don't want to switch jobs and then immediately get pregnant (I like my current job, but it has little potential for growth and the benefits are awful). I'm putting a lot of attention on hypothetical baby that I should be putting on the wonderful kids I already have. My diet is even worse because of the TTC (this one has a lot of loopy semi-logic that I'm not even going to try to explain).

 

At the same time, the whole family wants another, the focus on BD is improving me and DH's relationship (and I kind of need that motivation), and the fact that we've been actively trying for nine months now without success leads me to not want to stop trying, as I don't suspect waiting is going to improve that situation (whatever it is) any.

 

Probably I need to switch jobs and/or plan a move. All my other kids have involved awkward circumstances. Maybe that's what it takes.

 

So... I think we'll keep trying. I'm going to keep charting for at least a few more months because I think it helps keep my obsession in line, and I'm kind of having fun with it. I know enough about my body that not charting is only going to add ambiguity, and that's fuel for obsession. But this is the only TTC thread I'm going to let myself be involved in, I'm not going to OPK (haven't found them useful), and not going to test until a sane time.


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#72 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 02:21 PM
 
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Great reminder, Prescott. Let's make August the sane-est cycle this board has ever seen. I promise to stay sane this cycle. I will not test until 13dpo. I will roll with the punches and I will enjoy my August. I think a few of you ladies are early in your cycles, yes? May your O's be easy to detect and may your TWW's be full of relaxing distractions.

Today was my follie check. Nothing on the right side, but ol' lefty grew us a 19, 22 and a 15. Trigger tonight and IUI on Wednesday morning. I'm going to celebrate my obedient ovary by baking chocolate chip cookies followed by some BDing with the hubster. Come on lefty, you can do it!

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#73 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 04:06 PM
 
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I am not testing till I am late. I have too much stuff to do to worry about that. For example. My BIL is getting married on thurs. I LOVE weddings and so does DH and DD. We are gonna dance the night away! Then on the weekend I am running a 10K AT NIGHT. So much fun stuff coming up, and if AF comes along for the ride then that is ok too. (Although I would rather she show after the 10K)


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#74 of 677 Old 08-05-2013, 04:52 PM
 
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See Prescottchels - we really can't manage without you lol! My sanity is to keep focussing (goal since returning from Darwin) on only putting healthy food in my mouth, I'm not restricting quantity just quality in an attempt to revitalize and lose some kg. I'm keeping a loose eye on ff without temping - I know within a few days when I should o and for dh I'm trying to keep it low stress wink1.gif I figure my brain is focussing on the diet and exercise (spring cleaning lol) and the rest can just slip into place. Btw my body is rapidly changing its opinion on food - yesterday I had a single arnotts shape biscuit - the tongue went - eew sugary fake flavoring and doughy nutrition less base... A little scary, as I used to think them an ok snack

me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
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#75 of 677 Old 08-06-2013, 06:31 PM
 
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Prescottchels: great reminder and very true....what we focus our energy on expands.

Thanks chuord!! I enjoy reading everyone's posts. Seems like good company.

MountainMama: 10K!? That is awesome!! You must be in great shape. That is one thing I would like to fine tune before getting preggers again. My DS is 2 (today actually!) and my body is just beginning to look like PP. I still have significant Diastasis Recti so the "mummy tummy" bulge is there...but I would like to use this TTC time to focus on exercise. Thanks for inspiring me to refocus!

MamaBlue: I am 11dpo and AF is due in 4 days. I vow not to test until Thursday or Friday. Enjoy your choc chip cookies and BDing! And fx'd your obedient ovary pulls it off this cycle!

I am still nursing toddler at night and after nap, so that has held me back just a bit, I believe. I've had 3 PPAF's so far...and have been on Maca root for a couple months, also Vitex for about 3 weeks.

My DS's 2 yr birthday party is Saturday, so that is a fun distraction. We are having a pool party....since he doesn't have a ton of buddies yet it will mostly be family, friends, some little ones from our playgroup, and my 8 yr old DD's friends. So it should be a fun weekend for the kids. We are a blended/remarried family so I have 2 step-children (11 and 15). Never a dull moment. I wonder if I could even be considered "sane" wanting to add another baby to the mix! But we love children...I think one more would complete the family. We would like our 2 yr old to have a sibling somewhat close to his age.

We live in the US- Florida, so these are literally the hottest, steamiest days of summer. Have to stay wet! :-)
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#76 of 677 Old 08-08-2013, 03:02 AM
 
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Mama blue- how was the IUI? Hope it all went smoothly? Fingers, and everything else crossed for you this month. I think the chocolate chip cookies may just swing it!

Wengrin- pool party sounds great. I have a 15 year old step daughter too. It's a challenge step parenting a teenager. Do you get on well? Is he/she coping with the hormone flood?

Hoping- your question about temping or Opk... I started off just temping and I normally have a very clear thermal shift to spot o. This seems to be pretty reliable, although not until after the event! After a few months I tried Opk. I find it a bit fiddly and awkward to tell the darkness of the line. For a couple of month it has confirmed what I knew, when O was approaching. Now I know my body better I can feel O coming- largely because of libido and wanting to drag my husband to the bedroom!! So this month I'm not using anything except a holiday/vacation! I would recommend that you temp to get to know your body and what your signs feel like, throw in a bit of Opk if you fancy experimenting. Then throw it in and use your instinct. Most of all, have lots of BD around the right time and then it doesn't really matter if you can pinpoint the day as you are covered. I have been thinking lately that all the temps, Opk and testing is really about our curiosity (I totally include myself in this)!! I'm trying to focus more on BD regularly- that is what makes babies not measuring and tracking. I went through a temp obsessive phase that if I could get my chart right, then I would be pregnant!! After two months of a triphasic chart and still no baby, I'm going to try shifting tactics. I will let you know how it goes. My mornings are feeling a little empty without a thermometer to wake up to!!

Baby dust to all!
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#77 of 677 Old 08-08-2013, 06:48 AM
 
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I am sooooo happy my husband is starting to really get in the mood to have another baby. The other night he was looking up stuff to see what betters you to conceive for him and me. Made me so excited. We have been ttc for 6 mths. And I do believe in may I had a miscarriage when I had that positive test then day after started bleeding and hurting really bad. but that's okay I never went to doctor about it but never I'm having whacked up cycles but I think I'm gonna make an appt I wish I had insurance I would go to a obgyn and get test done. But I am pretty excited hubby is on the wagon lol
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#78 of 677 Old 08-08-2013, 04:20 PM
 
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Oxford - total ditto re temping! Lol wink1.gif I miss it too, but probably better to focus on bd than the thermometer...

me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
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#79 of 677 Old 08-08-2013, 06:00 PM
 
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Thanks oxford and Chuord for your advice. This is month 3 ttc#3. DD#1 and DS#2 were unplanned so I just thought it would happen really quickly, lol. I must remember
I'm nearly 10 years older now too wink1.gif So I am now CD7 and temping and using OPK just to check I am actually ovulating, I'm trying hard to just let things happen but DH is millitary and is away most of the time hence my reasoning for wanting to pin point days but I totally agree with you, I just need to focus on BD when he is here and what will be will be. Thanks ladies
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#80 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 01:08 AM
 
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Hoping- with two children already, I'm sure it will happen quickly for you. I've left it until 36 to TTC #1. I just didn't land my husband early enough!! Temping is fun though, it's reassuring to see your body in action, the chemical reactions are amazing! Hopefully it will help you pinpoint.
Also hoping- we are cycle buddies this month. I am CD8, so hopefully we can celebrate our BFPs together :-)
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#81 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 02:37 AM
 
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Oxford that's cool we are cycle buddies. I really hope we both get BFPs this month. I have been with DH since age 14 but had kids too early at 19 and 20 . So we are going again abeilt more prepared this time round!! Good luck to all of you on here. Fx for BFPs all round smile.gif
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#82 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 09:14 AM
 
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Oxford-
Yes those hormones sure aren't fun with teenage girls! Mine is only with us every other weekend, and they most times only stay one night. The teenager (girl) wants to be with her friends where their mom lives (about an hour away) and the boy (11) is a handful but also because they're not here that much, it's not as much of an issue.

Is your step-daughter sassy? I know it is harder the more time you spend I'm sure, there is more "parenting" involved. Mine is a different relationship, since there's not enough time for her to really get in trouble with us. She gets sassy with her own mom, because the ex and I talk and she tells me all about it. I think she must be on her best behavior when she is with us.

Now my own daughter who is 8....wow....I can't imagine her at 15. She seems to already be going through the phase! She is a sweetie but she sure has her moments too. We probably need another baby like we need a hole in the head (ha) since that would make 5 total between us. But kids bring so much joy...along with the headaches.

Hoping- I understand what you mean! I conceived #1 and #2 so easily! But now that I am approaching 40 it is not so easy. Plus of course BF plays a role.
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#83 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 09:15 AM
 
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I think I am 11 dpo and POAS this AM but I got a BFN. I feel so sure that I am...but we'll see. AF is due tomorrow. :-}
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#84 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 12:33 PM
 
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Hoping- that is so sweet that you were childhood sweethearts! :-) I'm sure it won't be long before you're pregnant again. Have you talked to your other children about it, or will it be a surprise.

Wengrin- we have exactly the same situation! My stepdaughter is 15, we have her every other weekend but she'd prefer to be with her mates - now the only thing that matters in her life!! Yes she's sassy with her mum, wouldn't dare with me! We get on ok, it's not the same as having your own child though. We are taking her away for two weeks from tonight, so I will fin that challenging having her around 24/7 for two weeks. I am used to it just being me and DH. She is just going through hormone overload, so you never know whether you will get giggly girlie or moody monosyllabic!! It's challenging being a step parent.

I'm so looking forward to my time off work. :-)

How you doing chuord?
Mamablue- did IUI go ok? Hope there is a little one starting to snuggle in right now. :-)
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#85 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 05:01 PM
 
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Morning ladies - am loving following the convo wink1.gif
I'm cd11, so fairly close to you guys...
Hugs to all xxx

me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
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#86 of 677 Old 08-09-2013, 09:09 PM
 
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Oxford- good luck on your 2 week trip! I hope everyone has fun and the teenage roller-coaster of hormones doesn't make life difficult. I know what you mean...it is very difficult being a step-parent. It is not the same when they're not you're own blood. I think I end up over- compensating and being much more pleasant to my step-children than I am to my own. That is not fair....I try not to do it. But it became a pattern early on, in an effort to make them feel welcome when they're with us. It is usually just my daughter (from previous marriage) and my hubby, and our 2 year old son that we have together. It is a "blended family" which poses many challenges. Not easy... We attend a small group from our church that are all in the same boat...blended step-families. So that is nice for us to be able to share our struggles and know that we are not alone...others to through he same type problems.

I hope you and hubby are able to conceive soon!! Maybe this relaxing time off work is just what you need to recharge and get ready for baby making!!!
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#87 of 677 Old 08-10-2013, 12:39 AM
 
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All this talk about step-families reminds me of when I was growing up. I was an unpleasant stepdaughter to say the least. My stepdad is a great guy and although clueless in the ways of parenting, always put forth so much effort to keep our family happy. We're definitely not close, but we keep in contact and see each fairly regularly. Even after my mom died, he is still welcome in my life. My kids call him Papa. Oxford and Wengrin, your struggles with being a stepmother may be difficult, but it's worth it. Keep up the hard work, ladies.

AFM - The IUI went as normal and was largely uneventful. I was a little spotty the day of and super bloaty. Bloating is not unusual for an IUI. The sportiness came from the doc having to battle my cervix to get the cath in, so no worries that something is amiss. So here I sit at 2dpIUI, trying to keep busy. As promised, I will not test until 14dpIUI and I will do my best not to symptom spot. Oh, I hope this is my month, because this IF stuff is expensive. (I think that's my biggest stress of all this stuff. I'm trying not to think about it.)

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#88 of 677 Old 08-10-2013, 05:26 AM
 
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Oxford: Yep we grew up on the same street but didn't like each other much as children and generally tried to avoid one another...but at age 14 things changed and he became kind of loveable, lol. We had our first child 5 years later and DS 16 months later. We really struggled through as teen parents and DH joined the Army and was/is never home. So the kids were in childcare during the day so I could finish my degree and work to pay for it. It sucked not being prepared for motherhood and feeling like I had NO idea what I was doing! But now the kids are 8 and 9 and I work part time as a psych nurse, funnily enough generally with post partum mothers dealing with depression and psychosis. I have access to maternity leave and my family have moved closer so things seem to be falling into place for us now.
The kids know we are ttc #3 and are super excited, I really hope it happens but DD wants a sister and DS wants a brother....I on the other hand would just love a healthy baby smile.gif
I admire you guys all dealing with step kids and blended families, it must be tough going at times but hey here's to hoping BFPs are just around the corner for us all wink1.gif
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#89 of 677 Old 08-10-2013, 05:08 PM
 
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Hoping I second that here's fx to success and mellow zen all around!
Btw I love your story and am totally utterly impressed at the effort you both went to to complete your education around all the stress... I know I wouldn't have been grown up enough to cope as well at that age.
Wendrin, Oxford - I'm sure you are doing a great job, really those kids are lucky to have an extra parent or two in their lives - I know it's gotta be hard all around at times, but so worth the effort.
Mamablue - yay for the invasive but being over this month (ouch on the catheta) and I'm so impressed with your strong zen mindset!
Oxford / happy holidays! And fx to a fun time!

Afm - had a fun day with dh yesterday (art gallery - goma, and qac... The new indigenous exhibition didn't excite us too much (we much preferred the work we saw in Darwin) at the end we chances on a small pocket of masters, and saw a small version of the ballerina at rest... It struck me in every cell and brought back memories of seeing the larger one in the pink tulle tutu at the musee de orsee Paris - it was like a replay of the best sex ever lol... So a magical day...

me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
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#90 of 677 Old 08-10-2013, 08:22 PM
 
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MamaBlue- that is sweet! Touching story...you are right. Even with the challenges it is so important to try to make a positive impact in our step children's lives. (My parents never divorced but oh wow I would have probably been a terror for a step parent).

I can imagine you are stressed about the cost of IUI...fx'd this is the one!

Hoping- that is funny you are a psych nurse! You can maybe offer some guidance if I start bugging out over here....ha. That must be a rewarding (and challenging) job. I used to think I wanted to be a nurse. But went into business/finance and became an auditor. Not nearly as exciting or rewarding. In currently at home with my son...hope to be able to work part time once the kids are in school. It is difficult living on one income but worth it for me. I hope DH continues to stay supportive of that.

Chuord- sounds like you and your hubby had a great day yesterday!! Love the way you described it! You must be in Europe...we don't have that kind of culture here in US. Well...not in Florida anyway.

Small update- today was my AF day and no show...not sure that is really an update, but I will wait and test on Monday. Will let you all know
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