me 40, DH 40, one (TTC since November 2012) At least one confirmed chem.Ivf #1 march 2014 - 6 day 6 blasts, bfn, 4 frosties. Ivf #2 may, cancelled, Ivf #3 July two transferred, 3 frosties... BFP! Scan at 6+4 wks - twins!! Feeling more blessed than words!
Congratulations primal!! Great news that you have a healthy bouncing baby boy!! Congratulations.
How did you tell DH? Did you buy a boy gift?
It's cd 11 here. We have started on alternate day BD so we're counting down to O on Friday probably. I have been getting more vagibally discharge though. It's white and I get it on my pants. It doesn't look like usual creamy CM though. Now I have no idea I this is because of the clomid or whether I have got an infection or thrush (it doesn't itch or smell bad). Has anyone who has taken clomid had this or should I go see the doctor about an infection? Sorry for the tmi, I appreciate your advice :-)
Hi to everyone else. I hope you are having a terrific Tuesday.
Sitting in re's waiting room at 605am... Hoping the nurse will do my last gonal after appointment I'm such a sook lol... Btw Oxford how are you with the hormones? Gonal is meant to have few side effects - but I find I'm down and depressed a lot in the evenings - that's really hard, being positive was all that got me through the migraines.
Just a thought here - I'm an atheist, but I am faithful to my husband and I believe in good people. I have faith in the good in the world and in community and people supporting each other. So to say someone who doesn't believe in a god or gods lacks faith - it isn't offensive, but I think there's a much better way to phrase it :) Like I said, obviously there was absolutely no ill will and I wasn't hurt, I just think words are powerful and I like to think about the real meaning of what we are saying. I consider myself a very faithful person to things I believe in. A deity just isn't one of them.
So exciting!! Two little boys! Now I wonder even more if I'll be adding a third little boy to the group or if it will be a sweet bitsy girl. So exciting. Congratulations, Primal! I'm so glad you are feeling comfortable and joyful.
Chourd and Oxford - Exciting times for you! I love how you're cycles are about in the same places right now. Makes it easy to keep track of. Chourd, I'm sorry to hear about your migraines and depression, though. That's just miserable. Do you have anything that helps with migraines? I find that caffeine really helps me.
AFM - Yep, 14 weeks. 15 next Saturday. I'm doing okay, not great. I've been having terrible sinus pressure which makes me dizzy and throw up, along with casing bad headaches and not being able to do much. We've had weird weather, so I'm hoping once it changes it will clear up. I don't really feel mentally pregnant. I think because there's so much else going on. I've been crocheting for baby, but every time I see myself in the mirror I'm surprised. No news on houses. I waver between hope and despair. DH is really depressed when he's up in Washington by himself. I've never known him to be so miserable or uncommunicative. I'm trying to convince him to join a gym for now, because I think the physical activity would cheer him up a bit. Right now he works all day, then stays at the office until 1 or 2 am watching Netflix and messing around on the computer.
Girl absolutely in love with boy and our DD (11/06), DS1 (08/11) and DS2 (brand new!)
Ok finished appointment follies -16, and a couple of almost there ones...
So I'm on 75 gonal for 4? Days and o suppression injections for 3 days... Sat morning appointment with likely trigger sat night for Monday iui... Apparently the blues from the meds is normal... Vitamin b and evening walks or exercise is the best remedy (unless severe and then meds) so I'm getting into that! I'm sick of crying and being not me...
Hope you ladies don't mind the manic sharing - just if there's any info I have that helps Oxford and vice versa I'm all for it... Lol meds suck!
Btw reading about your lives is helping me with the sanity - thanks!
I've been thinking about what you said about faith mares. I am a Christian and I don't judge it here who are or are not religious. As a Christian I think the word "faith" has a different meaning to me. It's about a trust in God, which I understand you don't believe in. I don't view you as not having faith in OTHER things, goodness, or not being faithful to your hubby (you clearly adore each other!). I think the word has a different religious meaning that I took from what wengrin said - ie she respects people who do believe in God or who don't believe in God beacause we all meet here as we are and in acceptance of our shared crazy journeys. That was my view. And you are such a sweetie mares, nobody could say you don't have faith in goodness :-)
Sorry to hear your DH is having such a tough time. Does he actually enjoy the new job, it is just something he's getting through? How are the kids managing without him?
Chuord- thank you so much for your advice on the CM. It's strange it hasn't happened today, maybe it was a weird hormone thing. I will take your advice and call the nurses. I am not being monitored for this and the next cycle so I'm not back there until the end of clomid cycle 3. Your follicle tracking sounds brilliant, that's day 12 for you isn't it? It sounds like you are right on track. I hope the IUI helps. Please keep sharing the detail, I am right with you. Sorry to hear the hormones are hitting you so hard on an evening, that is really no fun. I think the hormone up and downs were the most surprising thing to me on these meds, I don't think it's easy to understand for others. The first month I felt really battered by it. This month so far hasn't been too bad, it might be bad in LP though. Keep up the exercise and vitamin B and let DH absorb some pain for you ;-) I think the boys have it so easy the least they can do is be kind and supportive while we are feeling rubbish!!
Hi to everyone else. Is there anyone lurking who wants to say hi? You are welcome to join us
Dh did say it was unfair that it was all on me and he wished he could share - easy to say I know but it felt good.
Btw ditto on the faith, I think it's just one of those words that has several meanings and perceptions - I think we are a pretty great group that we can go there with that conversation without rancour or offence...
Ladies feel free to distract us lol
Oxford -- You really have my sympathy for the meds ups and downs. I've always been so sensitive to hormonal changes, to the point of having a lot of difficulty tolerating hormonal birth control. This must be so challenging! Are you doing TI this month? Monitoring?
Chuord -- I'm rooting for your follies! Just a little further guys! I'm glad it sounds like your IUI is going to happen.
Mares -- I'm an atheist too; I very much understand what you're saying about faith for non-religious people. Mine comes through very much in believing in the "long game" things in my life, like my marriage, parenting, and even growing my career. It helps me hang in there when the immediate circumstances don't seem very hopeful. It helps me with my ADHD, too, since I have to tap into that "faith" state of mind to get past my instant gratification mode.
I'm not at all offended by people mentioning their religious beliefs/faith/whatever you choose to call it. I come from a very religious family and live in the South, so my comfort with those kinds of differences is well-developed by necessity. I am glad that everyone can be respectful of where everyone else is and be kind in how they discuss this.
I had to hurry home after work yesterday, so I stopped quickly on the way home and got DH a "congrats on your new baby boy" greeting card. The actual reveal was a bit anticlimatic, because DH was not feeling well and was dragging himself to bed when I gave it to him (I can never wait for a good moment for these things). We had about five seconds of tearful happiness before he went to take some Excedrin and lay down. I wrangled the toddler for the night, while dealing with periodic phone calls from my ex-husband over silly logistical issues with the older kids. I was so wiped out by bedtime. Yeah, it's a glamorous life.
In other news, we're supposed to be getting snow tonight, which is not at all usual for this area. Once again, my group at work is freaking out about driving to work, and the grocery store is full of people trying to buy milk in a blind panic.
Girl absolutely in love with boy and our DD (11/06), DS1 (08/11) and DS2 (brand new!)
Hi ladies! Lovely to see wonderful news and great discussions going on. Enjoy reading along and rooting for you guys!
We are having the ice cold, single digit weather here. No school today because of the cold and 2 hour delay tomorrow. Thankfully used to goofy winter weather but this has been the coldest in such a long time!
Hope everyone stays warm or cool depending on where you are.
Me - 40 - mthfr c677t and multiple unknown caused m/c's
DH - 41 - old and cranky
DS - 6 - ASD and severe adhd
Can I whine here for a minute? Please don't read if you don't want to hear someone complain about what I'm sure is a small issue in the long term.
It's just been a very long week. I'm trying to be a trooper, but I'm getting frustrated with DH and feeling sorry for myself. As I mentioned before, DH wasn't feeling well on Monday, so he went to bed as soon as I got home from work (with our Verifi results). I had the toddler to myself that night, not feeling great, and simultaneously getting phone calls from my ex-husband about how I might need to come pick up my older kids because *he* wasn't feeling well (never mind that he was barely willing to take the boys from me when I went into labor with DD). Anyway, I was determined to not be a wimp about that. Yesterday DH was feeling a lot better, but I was working at home and had a terrible headache. DH was at school, and toddler was all over me, which is sweet sometimes but difficult when I'm trying to get things done or am feeling edgy. He didn't make dinner that night (this is part of our deal, since I'm working and he's not right now). I tried to go to bed early, but he wanted to hang out in the bedroom with me, and kept the toddler up there with us (which definitely means sleeping is out). I eventually asked him to please take her downstairs so I could rest, and he got irritated with me for asking. Again, I was really trying to not be a jerk and just roll with it. Anyway, he wasn't feeling good last night, again (maybe the same bug? I don't know). He was up a lot during the night. But he wasn't quiet, so he kept me up quite a bit, too. Then I had to get up in the morning; we had some bad weather, so I was working from home again. I got DD up and got her dressed, and then went downstairs to get online. He got up for a few hours, but disappeared around lunch. He's been sleeping ever since, and once again I am dealing with DD alone while trying to work. I'm just getting pretty cranky about it. I recognize that it's not his fault if he's not feeling well, but I haven't felt great in a few months. I also get annoyed that he doesn't seem to recognize that working from home is still working, and I need for him to take care of DD while I'm doing this when he can. Also, I'm hungry and have no clean clothes. I hate feeling that I don't have backup, because I really do have a lot on my plate. I need him there, or I start to freak out about what I'm really taking on. I've had enough
(P.S., Mares, I have extra sympathy that you're dealing with your LOs on your own right now. It's a lot.)
Anyway, I am going to try to find something to eat. And I don't care how much ice is on the road tomorrow; I'm going into the office so I can get a break already.
Big hugs. I am right behind you cx
Thanks, Chuord. I'm not truly mad at him, just feeling burned out and frustrated. I am at the point where I can't take on anymore, so it really stresses me out when it looks like he can't handle his side of this deal. We don't have the option of switching roles right now, so I really do feel at his mercy in a lot of ways (and I would bet he feels the same about me, so there you go).
I don't have an actual office at home; I work from the dining room table. I think driving will be safe tomorrow, though. Thank god.
I ate a tuna sandwich and am trying to mentally prepare myself for walking the dog in the snow and putting DD down tonight without help. Really trying not to get angry about this. It's not so much that he is feeling sick, etc., but that he doesn't seem to realize that there is a problem with just checking out on the situation when he isn't 100%. I definitely don't get to do that. I haven't had a nap since this pregnancy started.
Primal- stop being so nice!! Speak your mind, tell him to pull his weight and look after his pregnant wife. Come on girl!! That boy needs to wake up and give you some help. You are a team. Tell him exactly what you need then go out to a coffee shop and tea a magazine!!! You DESERVE it!!!!
Big hugs. I am right behind you cx
You are awesome. Thank you for getting mad on my behalf. It really helps sometimes to have friends who will do that for you!
How is everyone doing? Ovaries behaving? Baby beans bouncing?
AFM - I had my first midwife appointment of my pregnancy today. It went well, my midwife is so calming. I'm measuring 15-16 weeks which is perfect, but we couldn't hear the heartbeat because she uses a fetal monitor, not a Doppler. She didn't actually even want to try, but I asked her to, and of course baby was shy. I felt baby kick a of couple times last night, so I'm not really worried something is wrong. I asked her about baby's movement being less easy to feel than my other pregnancies, and she said (very nicely) that it's probably because of my extra tummy fluff and maybe an anterior placenta. She thinks the fluff is the biggest culprit though. lol. As long as baby boy is healthy, he can be as shy as he wants.
Loved "man flu." So true and so frustrating. I have retired to my bedroom for the night. I told DH he needs to take DD to daycare tomorrow, and he snapped at me. We sort of got into it, I tried to stay cool, explaining that I was frustrated because this had been going on all week and I felt unwell and tired all of the time. He said, "I think there's a difference between not feeling well and being sick." Aaaaaand that was enough for me. I'm going to sleep and work this off. And I swear this is the end of my cranky marital play-by-play for tonight.
I have to read, like, so much Chaucer in the next two days. It may be time for Cliffnotes.
Lovely - Yay for the awesome doctors appointment and happy bean! A great reason to celebrate.
Faith- great news on your appointment too. I'm so pleased we get to hear the news through your pregnancy, great stuff! And happy birthday.
Primal- honestly, men. As much as we love them, and we all do, they think we are their mothers!! We want a 50:50 relationship, or even 60:40 and they think 10:90 is ok. He needs to recalibrate and raise his pain threshold! Stick to your guns and hold him to it. You are mrs amazing at the best of times holding very thing together, when you are also baking a baby he needs to get back in the game quickly. It's not like you haven't been sympathetic or let him rest, now he needs to move on. It is difficult working from home if you don't have your own space to avoid everyone. Do you have mobile broadband so you could go work in a coffee shop and be physically out for a while? My DH tends to do that when I am annoying him!!!
Over here I was a hormone mess last night, really sad and vulnerable. I told my DH how bad I was feeing and he just said, do you want a cuddle on the sofa? I said yes and burst into tears. He just sat and held me for an hour. Ugh, ladies, I swear u have gone loopy!! This is sooo not like me at all!! We had a talk about our options. The next consultant appointment is end of March when I have done three rounds of clomid, so u think we might try a round of IVF. Over here you get one round for free on our public healthcare system, so I want to try it before I get any older (I'm 37 in May). It's a tough decision though. DH is very hopeful about clomid and not so much about IVF. He's sad that it would come to that- I think I went through those emotions when I started clomid.
Anyway, hi to everyone else. Hope the end of the week is looking good for you xx
Primal congrats on a healthy baby boy!!! That is amazing and awesome news. Sorry that you are carrying the weight and big hugs.....hope hubby realizes that you need your rest right now.
I am rushing because I quickly read through the posts. I have had a busy week. I also just got the bill for my D&C and it is $2,000! I was floored. I had no idea it cost that much. I guess I should have asked first. I probably would have tried going through it first at home....but of course that would have been even more traumatic and would have happened around Christmas Day. I had the procedure on the 18th......oh my.....I am just spinning. $2,000 is almost what our maternity co-pay would have been for a newborn....except I have a hole in my heart and no baby.
Sorry I won't complain anymore.....I know many have spent thousands on fertility and pregnancy complications, etc. It just scares me to try again because what if we have another miscarriage.....I don't know how people afford it. We were worried about coming up with the co-pay of $2,500 to the OB before 20 weeks (their standard office procedure).
Anyway. A little blue about that. I just finished my AF cycle....so I'm on day 6 I think.
I hope everyone is doing well, and I in no way mean that anyone here lacks faith or meant to imply that without God or religion or anything that we are any different or better or worse than the other. We are all in this together. I know that religious beliefs are a touchy subject so I will keep to the ttc talk and cheer on our pregnant mamas!
Wendy -- Oh, I remember what a gut punch that bill is after a loss! It's a horrible feeling. FWIW, I think you did the right thing having the D&C, since as I recall it had been a while since the baby had stopped growing. That wait is so agonizing, and it can go on for a long time. Did you look at the hospital's charity care program? It applies to people at a lot of income levels (bill may not go away entirely, but it might be substantially reduced), and does apply to balances after insurance (meaning, it's not just for the uninsured). I think a lot of people don't know about it, and the hospital doesn't usually tell you. I am really sorry you are having to experience this fresh insult.
Mamablue -- I think I'm confused if what you were describing wasn't a fetascope. Is it a fetal monitor like what they put on you in a hospital?
Mamablue- congratulations on the little football player you have in there!! He us making himself known now :-)
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