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40+ and TTC right over here!!

12K views 432 replies 25 participants last post by  nanmama02 
#1 ·
Shall we start again? That one was 12 pages!!

CD 5 for me~ done being depressed and now my mood starts to pick up as possiblity is before me.

Polka, how ya doing?
 
#252 ·
Hey GM, glad your count went up. Mine is a little disturbing. On day 21 they were a whopping 3,135 and on day 23 they were 4,165.
I'm supposed to go back in tomorrow and have them tested again but I don't want to.
It's my dd's birthday this weekend and I don't think I could handle any bad news. I mean really - what could I do if the numbers were lousy. Nothing. So, I think I might just wait it out. I need to be strong this weekend, not a weeping mess.
I feel fine. My stomach is kind of sore but that's normal. I'm exhausted and feel sick so that's good.
Any advice? I'm so stressed.
 
#253 ·
Joan, we really need to talk~ I wonder what to do too. Perfect, I mean perfect timing this month. I'm also early, which is weird for me.
It's CD 1 for me......

Hopeful, I would just wait it out, I agree with your thinking. By the way, I post under 'Ruthchloe' on the over 40 boards, so I'm pretty sure I've read and discussed your BFP over there! Hang in there girl.

I was so hoping this was my month, the baby would have been born days before my 44th birthday. I feel so completely discouraged. I thought I was one of the fertile ones, and it is hard, hard to think I may not get my dream.
 
#254 ·
hi all
I understand the good timing stuff & all that..
We should be PG...
:

I go in for my Laser Lap/HSG late next week - maybe something will be found & fixed.

will do more personals later -
 
#255 ·
sorry if this double posts, I lost my post somehow

hopeful, I have read that the hcg levels can be highly variable from day to day - I've not found any info on how variable is considered acceptable, though. I think it's braver not to go get another test, I go crazy not knowing for sure how things are going. And for me, the longer I go thinking everything is OK, the harder I fall if it's not. I agree with your plan not to get tested tomorrow and enjoy your weekend, but I'd probably go Monday because I wouldn't be able to stand not having more information. But that's just me. Good luck with it either way.

Joan, even when you're pg you don't trust it anymore after mc. I don't know when I will - maybe after amnio like happened with DS. Once we found out he was healthy, we relaxed and enjoyed it more.

Polka good luck with the HSG, please let us know how it goes.

Velveteen,
.
 
#256 ·
I was just visiting another MDC thread after many months, saw Polka there and came back to read this one. I had to look around for the new TTC over 40 thread but I found you!
I have wanted to come back many times but I just don't know. I'll be 47 in August and although I swear I still feel like there's one to come, I can't imagine a pregnancy happening to me now. I'm no longer tracking my temp (never was good at that with my weird nighttime routines) and I don't even know what cycle day it is, but every time I think I've O'd I find myself holding my breath until next CD1. Although I don't really expect it I'm still disappointed when it doesn't happen. Maybe I just need to say it out loud but I'm not ready yet! So can I come hang out with you guys again for a while?
So I read the first page of this thread and then the last and possibly THREE pg's right now! Wow! congrats and best of luck Ladies!
 
#257 ·
Velveteen: I was pretty sure that was you. And of course, I'm not too original with name changes, LOL
Velveteen - don't forget, we are the same age. We have similar diets although I think yours is better and we both take the same type of vitamins and wheat grass and all that stuff. The thing I did different was the femara, the wheat grass and only two months of acupuncture. I think perhaps you just need a little push and "bang", you'll be pg too. Like I said on the other site, I'm just an average gal. Maybe you just need some acupuncture?????
As far as the testing goes - I'm going to call and ask for an ultrasound. I don't want to mess around with numbers. I'll be far enough along that they can tell if all is well by an ultrasound. I sure feel pg. And everything feels as it should. Thanks for your thoughts ladies, it means alot.
 
#258 ·
Hopeful, thanks for the kind words. CD 1 is always the very worst day.
I tried to look things up about Femara, I would like to try it, but no thanks on the Clomid. I'll be talking to dh about it soon, but so far I have just tried all the lifestyle changes, wheat grass, no alcohol or caffeine, excersice, etc. I am trying to have a positive outlook, but I do feel beat down lately.
Let me know how you are doing!
 
#260 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by hopeful130
Hey GM, glad your count went up. Mine is a little disturbing. On day 21 they were a whopping 3,135 and on day 23 they were 4,165.
I'm supposed to go back in tomorrow and have them tested again but I don't want to.
It's my dd's birthday this weekend and I don't think I could handle any bad news. I mean really - what could I do if the numbers were lousy. Nothing. So, I think I might just wait it out. I need to be strong this weekend, not a weeping mess.
I feel fine. My stomach is kind of sore but that's normal. I'm exhausted and feel sick so that's good.
Any advice? I'm so stressed.
Hopeful what did you decide? No retesting till next week?

Catherine
 
#262 ·
Velveteen - I really think there is a baby in your future, I really do. I just think that acupuncture would be a great thing to get the blood going.
Anyway, retesting next week. Everything feels as it should. Getting bigger already, sore bbs like crazy and huge. Just feel good. But, I know I have to go in. They just traumatized me. For sure next week. My numbers would be really high now for an ultrasound. Today I am six weeks.
 
#263 ·
Hi ladies I have been lurking for awhile.

very new at this, and have some questions.

45, concieved naturally 2 1/2 yrs. ago. nursing toddler. had BAD PPD so it took us this long to be "ready" Now that we are ready.....

1) I am on progon-B (a nat. progesterone) for PMS and PPD. low dose cd1-13 then double dose cd13-AF

2)cycles shortening 24 days. I have stringy cervical fluid cd7-10 usually.

where to start. Does the progesterone work like contraception? Will it prevent me from concieving? Thickens cervical fluid?

Also ND has me on a combo containing vitex.for my PMS. What does that do in YOUR experience.

I will start taking temp. next cycle.

I forgot to up my progon-b at mid cycle and was sooooo depressed. Cd17

TIA
For all your spirit and sharing
 
#264 ·
Intentfullady, I am glad you are here!! I also take natural prog., but only in the LP of my cycle. I'm not sure if that would work like bc or not, maybe you could ask your ND on that.
Vitex has helped me with my cycles. I now take Fertility Blend instead, which also contains Vitex, and many other things to boost fertility.

Hopeful, I really want to beleive that there is a baby for me in my future. I find myself noticing moms who look 'older' and wondering if they conceived naturally.
My cycle was short this time, this is unusual and has me worried. I was a good 3 days early, yikes!

Intentful, have you tried Robitusson to thin cervical fluid? Plain kind, green box, no other added ingredients, just guaifenesin syrup.

Plus, just to pass this on, I found a place on Fertility Friend for those trying to conceive in their 40's. There is even a buddy group for those that are 45+ if you scroll down on the page. Cool!

Me: TTC 20 months (or is it 21?) and still hoping hoping hoping!
 
#265 ·
welcome intentful. you will find a wonderful group of supportive women here.

re progesterone, my understanding is that it can affect ability to conceive. You should only start using it 3-4 days after your LH surge and take it till you get your period (full flow, not just spotting.) If no period shows up and you are pg you take it through the 12th week. I don't recall the mechanism by which it inhibits pregnancy but it does - I think it has something to do with your body thinking you're pregnant even tho you're not, similar to what bcp's do. You should check with your doctor, since you have other reasons for taking it...but even so I don't think I'd double the dose til 3-4 days after LH, which may or may not be day 13 for you in any given cycle.
 
#266 ·
I think I'm in the 2ww right now; and if my signals were right, we did bd within 24-36 hours before ewcm, so now I watch the calendar. I hate this part. I didn't plan anything this month; isn't that how it usually happens?

but as usual, I expect anything, or nothing.

Velveteen, big hugs! And remember, if we quit all this, we'd have to take up knitting or something! So don't lose hope, there's always a chance.

Do you guys have a cut-off age or date? Like "if I'm not pregnant by the time I'm 45 (or 48 or 41) then I'm quitting?" I keep doing that and then when I reach that date, I move it back by a year.

Intentfullady, you have a lot to deal with. Kudos to you for keeping it so organized! I'm not doing anything but trying to live a good lifestyle and take care of myself. I'm overwhelmed with all the supplemental options out there. I think a fertility specialist would say "are you nuts? you have 3 great kids and you're OLD now stop it!" so I don't dare go the professional route.

joan: hey girl! welcome back! and in my experience, when you mc a pregnancy, the next one is pins and needles until at least the first trimester is over. You don't want to accept it as true and I found I would squash any feelings of attachment at the beginning, fearing the worst. and you know what? I feel closer to that child than my others - not that I "love" him more, of course, but I think I appreciate him more, you know?
gm: how are you doing?
hopeful: any news?
maja: any implantation signs?
polka: anxious to hear how your procedures go - good thoughts and hugs for you, sister!

What a beautiful day; think I'll go get dirt under my nails!

luv - Nan
 
#267 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by nanmama02
I think I'm in the 2ww right now; and if my signals were right, we did bd within 24-36 hours before ewcm, so now I watch the calendar. I hate this part. I didn't plan anything this month; isn't that how it usually happens?

but as usual, I expect anything, or nothing.

Do you guys have a cut-off age or date? Like "if I'm not pregnant by the time I'm 45 (or 48 or 41) then I'm quitting?" I keep doing that and then when I reach that date, I move it back by a year.

Intentfullady, you have a lot to deal with. Kudos to you for keeping it so organized! I'm not doing anything but trying to live a good lifestyle and take care of myself. I'm overwhelmed with all the supplemental options out there. I think a fertility specialist would say "are you nuts? you have 3 great kids and you're OLD now stop it!" so I don't dare go the professional route.

maja: any implantation signs?
polka: anxious to hear how your procedures go - good thoughts and hugs for you, sister!

What a beautiful day; think I'll go get dirt under my nails!

luv - Nan
Crossing my fingers for you! My cut of at this very moment, is having a baby in 2006 - which of course could be stretched to getting pg before in 41, bday is in feb

My chart..in my sig, is making me obsess, look at the dip yesterday at 6 dpo and the quick rise back today - it is trying to get my to think it is implantation - but man i dont want to obsess and be disappointed- i know this could take a while if it ever happens, but it would be so nice for it to happen NOW!

Ok, so i digress, and obsess...whee :)

Catherine
 
#268 ·
Maja, I would totally be obsessing with that chart!! Oh my!

I think I have passed my cut-off mark about three times. I keep changing it once I get there. This last cycle was the last time I could have had a baby while I am 43, that would have been so cool! The good thing is, dh is very supportive and just feeling that love helps me a lot. I just cannot give up when it gets right down to it.
As long as I am having regular cycles, I guess there is still a chance. '
Right now, I think I am taking all this nurturing out on my garden. So the 'bean' I have growing in a pot is doing very well!

Nan, I'll be hoping for you!
Polka, where are you?
 
#269 ·
Im officially nutso now...I test this am, and a BFN but i thought i could see something...ya know, in the right light, etc etc? Remember Im only 7DPO -so, about 4 hours later on a whim i tested again- and

pic 1

pic 2 with colors inverted

Im 7 DPO- no way this could be a real pos- but man, if it is...wow-

Hold my breath for a few more days

Catherine
ETA there is indeed a second line, im pretty sure weve created a tiny little miracle, it is so early tho, im hoping it sticks
 
#271 ·
Maja, I see it! When I had my positive, I got it at 8 dpo, because I just knew. It was light, but it was there.

Intentful, cool about your friend! My friend was 46 when she delivered her healthy girl, she also had a healthy baby at 42. Just natural BD method, no intervention.
 
#273 ·
Hello, all, I am jumping in after lurking for some time and have decided to after reading Intentful Lady's post. I am also 45 and after long struggle with self and dh, have finally decided to give it (TTC) a serious go before throwing in the proverbial towel. I already have a 4 yr old ds and I do feel lucky that I got pregnant with him (have endometriosis and dh was told to have low sperm count though not tested recently).

This is only the second month of deliberately TTC for us. I am using the ovulating indicator test sticks and have been confused by them (showed a second line but it was faint) and I have my fingers crossed that we had sex on the right days. (Wouldn't you know it, I seemed to be ovulating as soon as the weather got so hot and humid I don't want to be touched let alone have sex.)
 
#274 ·
Catherine, looks to me like a +!! Keep us posted!

jempd, welcome! I've been using the test strips for some time now--you want to see the second line as dark as or darker than the control--that's the sign that O is iminent.

Nan, I don't have a cut-off date, but I "quit" every month sometime during the 2 ww, thinking, "I can't do this any more." Then, the next month, as O approaches, I decide, "One more month."
 
#275 ·
Welcome jempd! You came to the right place. These ladies have btdt with anything you can try! Good luck!

Well I got a BFN this morning. I had to test.. I don't know when I O'd but it's been 16 days since bd (I'm with you on the heat thing jempd!) and I've been feeling nauseous off and on for the past week or so. It was really strong this morning (still is as we speak) so I went for it. OH WELL.
Maybe I'll give myself 2 more months since I'm 47 in August! yikes. Now just have to wait until capricious AF decides to rear her ugly head and start counting and temping again. maybe I'll invest in a OPK. I have one of those spit (fern?) tester things and it's a piece of caca. I can't even read it. What money we spend on this business of ttc!
Off to lead LLL meeting... stay cool girls!
 
#276 ·
Hi Ladies, I'm still lurking. Sorry about your bfn nanamama
:
Welcome to the newbies and hope your stay is short.
GM - where are you?
I still haven't gone back to the doctor. I am now 6wks three days I think. I realize now that I was completely traumatized last week by the nurse. She sounded so fatalistic. I mean, when your numbers are as high as mine were and then they don't double - it doesen't mean its over. And she made me believe it was until I researched the information myself.
So, now I just cant' bring myself to go back. Is that crazy or what? But really, what can they do. If something is wrong, then something is wrong. There is nothing we can do at this point.
Everything feels just fine to me. Although I'm not sick at all, I have sore bbs ALL the time and I'm always hungry. My tummy looks quite large, especially by the end of the day. Too big for how far along I am but what do I know. So, given these things, why should I rush back to the doc's. The thought of it makes me cringe right now. Am I nuts or what?
Would anyone else feel like this?
I know I can't wait much longer as dh wants to call his mother after the ultrasound. I figure next week some time.
You know, sometimes ignorance is bliss. When I was 32 and carrying my second, they just told me I was pregnant. I was like "cool". I didn't bat an eye until 14 or 15 weeks when they did the ultrasound. I knew very little about any potential problems and my ignorance made me very relaxed. Why do I have to be so obsessive now.
Sorry about all the rambling. I'm good at it.
 
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