So, what type are you?? - Mothering Forums
Trying To Conceive > So, what type are you??
Arduinna's Avatar Arduinna 09:44 PM 11-20-2002
When you think it's a bust cycle, but aren't sure what type are you??

You want everyone to be positive and encouraging, because you never know??

Or you want everyone to be realistic, because you don't want to get your hope up and be disappointed??

It's sometimes so hard what to say to someone when things don't look good, but it's not over till AF shows sooooooo

Me, I fall into the second group. I hate getting my hopes up for nothing, so don't try and boost my spirits when I know it's useless :-)

Shakti's Avatar Shakti 09:51 PM 11-20-2002
Good timing on the question, Arduinna, since I just posted 'Totally Bummed,' and I didn't even know what kind of response I wanted! In fact, I felt a twinge of quilt because there may still be hope for me this cycle, and lots of us here have just gotten AF, and I know how heart-breaking that is. At least I still have hope! I think it doesn't really matter to me if people are encouraging or realistic. What helps me the most is just to have someone say, 'Isn't the wait MADDENING?!?' In other words, I just needed to vent!

Viola's Avatar Viola 11:19 PM 11-20-2002
Funny you should ask this. I was just thinking that it's kind of exciting to come here, knowing that I can test in a few days, but then I think why am I getting so excited when I truly don't feel pregnant? Plus, I am actually hoping that I'm not this month anyway, so why work myself up when I feel like I will be happy however it turns out. I almost used condoms this month but then I figured I'd just see what happened. But then I feel guilty for saying that, because I know there are plenty of people who want to get off this TTC ride. And if I'm still here a year from now, I'll have gone crazy by then.

The last two times I've conceived, I started obsessing, testing way too early and getting sad when the results were negative. Now I'm feeling fine, just waiting for my period like normal. LOL, talk to me in a few days and see if I still feel the same. I haven't bought any cheap tests yet, and I told myself I would do it well in advance this time.
stafl's Avatar stafl 11:39 PM 11-20-2002
It really just depends on my mood at that moment. Mostly I come here for the encouragement. Sometimes I just don't want to get my hopes too high. Most of the time I seesaw back and forth between the two extremes! As if PMS weren't bad enough without the added stress of ttc...
For me, it's usually a relief when af shows, even though it was very heartbreaking when ttc the first time around. At least the wait is over and I can start all over again! I think charting has helped me feel more in control of things, even though it is all out of my control anyway. At least this time around I know when af should show up, and with my whacked cycles that was the biggest stress of all.
MamaSoleil's Avatar MamaSoleil 11:47 PM 11-20-2002
I am the QUEEN of getting my hopes up!!!!!

Actually, I just came back from a moonlight hike with my dogs, I channeled so much energy towards the moon, and asked for her magnetic energy to help my body swipe up dh's sperm....
So, I'll be having high hopes this cycle!!!
What do I want others to say? I don't's all mind games to me...I want to believe...but then if I don't suspect it...will I be? So really, I can play nonchalant,,,but it's ALWAYS there, I CANT get rid of it!!!

Now that I'm confused...I'm going to retire to my bed...
EnviroBecca's Avatar EnviroBecca 04:39 PM 11-21-2002
I mainly want the commiseration, but I like encouragement or realism, too--none of them upsets me, anyway. What I don't like is when people say, "Sorry AF found you this month," because as a woman who often has long gaps between cycles, I'm so pleased and relieved to see AF--I mean, my first choice would be pregnancy, but AF comes in second and way above prolonged waiting!!!
kelly's Avatar kelly 05:48 PM 11-21-2002
Good point, EnviroBecca.

I am usually very optimistic and excited around the time of O, then slowly I become more and more pessimistic, convincing myself that I couldn't possibly be pg. After all, I tell myself, I've done this 8 times already with no success - why should this time be any different: . It does help to have others cheering me on, though!

Sahara's Avatar Sahara 04:34 PM 11-22-2002
I'm both, and it's up to everyone else to figure out the perfect thing to say to me in any given moment

I love the encouragement you all give me here. Privately, I try not to get my hopes up, but throw in the occasional positive visualization exercise 'just in case'. This is why sometimes I think charting gives you too much information, I know a woman who didn't realize she was pregnant until she was 4 1/2 months along. It would be the shortest pregnancy ever! Meanwhile I'm neurotic for 2 weeks. Knowledge is power, though, right? :
Aurora's Avatar Aurora 05:15 PM 11-22-2002
I agree with what Sahara said!

I pretend to be upbeat, but really I don't want to get my hopes up.: I must say though, you ladies are WONDERFUL and I appreciate the encouraging words and love.

to all!
StarMama's Avatar StarMama 10:13 PM 11-23-2002
I'm not sure what type I am now.... I think while I TRY to remain neutral so I don't get my hopes bashed in, I'd like positive encouragement. Yeah I'm weird. I'm still trying to tell myself "this is just for practice, this is just for practice" so I WON'T get as upset!