TTC 6+ Months October Support Thread - Page 9 - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-17-2006, 01:24 PM
 
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Anonymousk - your chart looks good today! Where are you this morning?
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Old 10-17-2006, 01:31 PM
 
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Sobbing my eyes out, mostly. Hiding at my desk the rest of the time. I posted on the One Thread, so I won't repeat the details, but I feel so betrayed and judged by the docs office and now I am so discouraged, as if they must know something I don't know and I can't possibly be pregnant and why would I even think it was possible when I've done this before?

DH has grudgingly agreed to meet me at home for lunch in a few minutes. He does not understand what's going on, emotionally. I have a phone call with my therapist at 1:00. Thinking that I might need to have a VERY IMPORTANT MEETING this afternoon... at the Kerasotes. Something very sad where no one will notice a girl going through box after box of tissues.

Oceanmommy - I remember that chart too. It broke my heart. :
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Old 10-17-2006, 03:54 PM
 
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I am so sorry you are feeling so terrible today. This cycle has been very difficult for you. I hope you won't have to go through it again. I still think your chart looks nice. I really hope you can get through these next couple of days okay. Good idea, I had to look up "Kerasotes" to see what it was, but maybe see something funny and uplifting

I know I felt very frantic last month and your posts remind me of how I felt all last month. I know how sad it can be. I wish I could go to the movies with you!

I have been taking long leisurely walks each day, thinking about nature, and I cleaned out several closets, organizing and getting rid of old junk. It has helped pass the time a bit. I also have been getting into really good books and looking forward to reading them after work. That helps immensely! By the way, you don't get to read for approximately five or more years after you have a baby, so might as well get that in early!!

I am telling you don't give up hope so early. It will happen for you. It is hard when you get so excited about something and have to wait so long, but nature has its ways. The right time will come for you.
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Old 10-17-2006, 04:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Awww, I'm so sorry Anon. If I were this frantic (and I have been!), I'd probably POAS. At least you could start to cope either way.

What a rollercoaster, Christy! I'll keep thinking good thoughts for you.
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Old 10-17-2006, 05:19 PM
 
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Anon - I'm so sorry sweetie!
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Old 10-17-2006, 05:35 PM
 
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Racecar and anon
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Old 10-17-2006, 05:52 PM
 
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Racecar--Cycle buddies here. I'm CD 1 too. I got most of my : taken care of this weekend and yesterday. Today, I went supplement shopping. I may be a little crazy. It's not healthy... but maybe it is...?

I'm sorry Anon. Don't worry about what the drs office thinks. It doesn't matter--and they probably give you very little thought anyway, sad but true. We're still here with you and we think you've got some serious symptoms and a good-looking chart. I had to look Kerasotes up too. Have a good cry at the movies!

oceanmommy--I would call your doctor re: the Clomid. Maybe he'll be okay with giving you a prescription now. I had my Prometrium prescription for 2 months before I used it and it made me feel good to have it. Even if he doesn't want to give it now for use in January, he might make a note of it in your chart and then maybe it will be easy to get in January without a pre-visit. I've not taken Clomid, Hopesmom?, but I think they do want to do some monitoring during that cycle.
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Old 10-17-2006, 06:23 PM
 
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Sorry funnygrace about CD1. I spent $80 last month on supplements! Let's hope something works for you this month!

Oceanmommy - Did the doctor recommend Clomid for you? What exactly would it be for? Ovulation? I am just wondering if you had been diagnosed and then they recommended Clomid or do they just try Clomid on everyone if you want it. Just curious.
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Old 10-17-2006, 09:25 PM
 
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funnygrace - so sorry for cd1, but glad to hear that you had fun shopping for supplements!

Waiting to o here, although I think it will probably be a few weeks until I o, probably not until around cd35. : I think I actually like the 2ww better than the waiting to o part.
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Old 10-17-2006, 10:12 PM
 
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Racecar, I'm so sorry.
It's not fair, take care of yourself and enjoy a good drink. Hopefully after this long cycle, your body will be all ready for a little bean.

Funnygrace, sorry she found you too. I hope the supplements work their magic and we are celebrating next month!

AnonI hate to hear you had a such a bad experience. Take care of yourself and enjoy your cry.
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Old 10-17-2006, 10:19 PM
 
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Thank you so, so much for all the hugs and support today. I really need them. After I talked to my therapist (while I was talking?) I totally lost it and cried even more, if that was possible. So it made going back to work a little complicated. Thankfully my best friend has been doing some temp work with me and she was there when I got back in. We went to Target and had some Starbucks and looked at all the shiny goodness. Then I was totally wiped out and went home and slept for a few hours. So no movie, but the week is still young. I told the office that I didn't know if I would be in tomorrow or not, and while I probably will be, it makes me feel better to know it's an option not to. My boss is amazing and while he doesn't know what's going on he's really supportive. I don't have a lot of PTO left but at this point it seems that I am having a fairly complete breakdown and I'll figure that out later.

I have given some more thought to POAS at home, and the problem is that I would really need to use FMU (why? this is inexplicable to me as well) and DH is working 6-3 so I am alone in the morning and I don't think I can handle it alone. I honestly don't know why it has become so impossible to me, other than the BFNs on 14 and 15dpo on that last important chart...

I really think that the nasty nurse was just the tipping point and all of the stress of TTC and my life in general just boiled over today - I'm sure that whatever is happening hormonally just opened the floodgates. I feel a little stronger this evening and I'm hoping to be back on top of things tomorrow. I really can't tell you how much all your posts have meant to me today... in fact, tearing up again just thinking about it (but in a good way this time, really!) :

to Racecar and funnygrace.
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Old 10-17-2006, 11:26 PM
 
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Ladies, I have a plan. If my temp is still up tomorrow then I'll go ahead and test like I was going to. If it plummets then I'll wait until Saturday or af arrives. I have come to the conclusion (since the spotting seems to have stopped now) that either I have just had the longest, lighest, crampfree af of my life (and gee if that's the case I hope it stays that way) or something different is going on. I'll let you know in the am after I get to work what the verdict is!

Mama to Aeden, : my little NICU grad and Conner and Liam () my precious twins. is due mid April!
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Old 10-18-2006, 12:57 AM
 
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Sounds like we need hugs all around here. Anonymousk, Racecare, Funnygrace, I'm thinking about you ladies.

My temp is still up. I'm spotting a litte. I'm sure AF will come tomorrow or the next day. I'm resigned to it. Thanks for all the thoughts everyone. It truly helps.

Christy : I'm in the same position as you. If I make it to Saturday I'll POAS too, just before I leave for Spain. But I don't expect to make it. I hope you do!!! Or that you get your BFP even before then!
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Old 10-18-2006, 09:04 AM
 
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Well, temp's back down, so no testing for me today. You know, I don't even care at this point I just want an answer. I'm so tired of guessing what's going to happen next. I really don't understand why this has to be so difficult.

Mama to Aeden, : my little NICU grad and Conner and Liam () my precious twins. is due mid April!
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Old 10-18-2006, 10:54 AM
 
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Christy. Not knowing can be so frustrating. Hang in there woman -- you'll know something soon. I hope it's great news!

cd1 here. : But I just got a little happy because I realized I can drink lots of Spanish wine on my vacation. And maybe ovulate over there. It would be great to conceive a baby in Spain! But I'm not going to temp this month. It would be all screwy with the time change and crazy hours I'm going to have to keep, and there's no point in obsessing. So we'll just have to BD a lot and hope for the best. And if we don't get pg this cycle, we start testing in earnest.

Anonymousk - I hope you're feeling better today.
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Old 10-18-2006, 12:45 PM
 
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: Chrissy. I'm waiting untl Saturday to POAS too... I know exactly how you feel. Some cycles it almost feels like it'd be a relief to have AF show up. At least it's an answer, right? :

: Hezzy too - but hooray for spanish wine and vacation!

anonymousk - I dunno about the other ladies here, but I've had days like that too. It stinks, but having a supportive DH and friends helps a lot. Just know that we are here for you to vent, and that even the funkiest of moods will pass. :
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Old 10-18-2006, 01:13 PM
 
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Hi All, See I'm crazy b/c I said I couldn't remember all the names of everyone, and had no idea that I could scroll and find them...duh?!?!

Christy I hope that you can hold out til Sat, and that you get a BFP!!!. I don't temp like that so I don't fully understand it, but if everyone else says it looks good then I'm sure it does. Good luck

Those on CD1, I'm sorry I know how heart breaking it is to want it so bad and then know it's not a reailty, but as my DH would say "We'll get 'em next time"
hehe, I always thought it sounded so grose, but hey, I said it anyway...GL

Hopesmom I am today on CD31 of a normal 30 day cycle...so I'm offically late. You did ask me a few days ago what CD I was on. i think...

Spain sounds like a wonderful place to conceive a child, and what a great story that would be for his/her prom date one day...hehe...BABY DUST TO YOU!!!

Ok, I am now late for my what has been very normal AF. I am always 30 days, and today is CD 31 but I'm too scared to test b/c I just don't want to see that BFN...symptoms, sensitive bb's on the sides and nipples. They don't hurt when I just touch them, but when clothing brushes them or the seat belt on the way to work...ouch. I have to pee like no other, I feel like I'm ovulating again. When I ovulate, I get cramping in my hips almost, and down my legs, and that's what is going on. I'm freaking exhousted, could sleep for 10 hours at a time it seems. But, I just knew that it didn't happen this month, my body was all weird and about a week ago I had what seemed like AF cramps and I thought she was going to come early...UUGGGGHHHHHH.

I said a prayer for the first time in a while the other night, and I prayed not for God to give me a baby to replace the one he took but to help out all of you. I don't need money, I don't need food, and my beautiful loving family is healthy, and as bad as we want another baby, I didn't ask for God to help us, there are more important things in life that me and I hope that he finds all of you soon and answers all of your prayers!!!

too all of you!!!

Tenk ~ happily married with lots of kids

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Old 10-18-2006, 01:41 PM
 
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Oh, and the stuffy nose that I've had for like 2 weeks now, every other pregnancy I've had a stuffy nose from conception til delivery and then it just goes away...

Tenk ~ happily married with lots of kids

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Old 10-18-2006, 01:43 PM
 
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OH, sorry one more thing, I have decided to test, I have a friend going past a $ tree at lunch and she's getting me a test so I will be poas today and let you know soon...cross your fingers???

Tenk ~ happily married with lots of kids

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Old 10-18-2006, 02:10 PM
 
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Hezzy - ENJOY SPAIN, though! Here's hoping this cycle's it - imagine the stories you could tell!
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Old 10-18-2006, 02:28 PM
 
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[QUOTE=oceanmommy;... Does anyone know for what reason a HSG would be used as a diagnostic tool for insurance purposes ?

OCEAN MUMMY-
Yes my insurance said that if my regular( not fertility specialist doc) doc scheduled the procedure and coded it "diagnostic" it would get full coverage as for any other diagnostic procedure.

I did the HSG last month it only hurt for 10seconds and it is supposed to increase fertility for three months.. like a good ole flush of the tubes. SO good luck with it particularly getting it covered.

Shane
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Old 10-18-2006, 02:46 PM
 
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Hola everyone :


Hugs for Christy, Funnygrace, Racecar, Hezzy, and anyone who just met AF that I didn't mention. I am so sorry ladies !

We still have some very pretty and promising charts happening :


I am hopelessly behind on the personals now so I will have to try for that later. Thanks for all the help on deciding whether to ask after clomid... I decided not to do it then I picked up the phone and called before I knew what I was doing. The Dr said we could certainly try clomid in a few months if I want, and that he would probably want to try progesterone suppositories first. He said that if you ovulate on your own there is actually evidence that you are less likely to get pg on clomid. I had never heard this but I think it is prudent to give it some time to research it. Anyways, it is nice to have this post-hsg road to go down for a bit, it feels straight and wide without any questions for a few months at least.

I told two of my closest friends irl about our ttc. They heard I went to the dr last week and both called to see if I was ok since I don't go to the dr often, so I felt like it was time to share a bit. They were both supportive and I asked them to keep it to themselves because I don't want my lack of fertility to be a topic of discussion when the girls all get together. One friend (who had to ttc #2 for like 6 months so she understands a bit more than many I'd say) said red clover was really good, and both times she started drinking it (follicular phase, not LP) she became pg (she is pg with #3 now). I looked into it and although it is promising it seems to be estrogenic and I feel like I have too much estrogen. More research to do on that one too.

Got to run... more later
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Old 10-18-2006, 02:53 PM
 
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Hi Shane, we posted at about the same time.

Thanks for your info on the hsg being diagnostic. The imaging center where I had it done was opitimistic about it being covered but they checked with my insurance (BC & BS) it wasn't because it is only diagnostic for fertility purposes and is therefore a fertility item which they do not cover. Personally I think it is ridiculous, and so did the woman at the center who did the checking. She said sometimes they don't cover fertility treatment but they cover the diagnosis... but my insurance won't cover "one dime". :


Well anyways it was worth it, I'd do it again if I had to do it over. I really hope you and I are both post-HSG success stories soon !
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Old 10-18-2006, 03:54 PM
 
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BFN!!! I was so hoping to post something else, I guess that's what I get for working myself into this damn frenzy...I'm never late, until now :

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Old 10-18-2006, 03:58 PM
 
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An update from our Fertility Toxic Friend:

Pregnancy Monitor

A negative test result has been recorded. If you tested early, we recommend that you wait past your longest luteal phase length to test again. If you are already past your usual luteal phase length, it is advised to contact your healthcare provider. More...


I had to pee on it. I was at the point where all I could do was sit on the toilet and debate about whether I should or not. At some point I decided it was ridiculous. I realize it doesn't change anything, but it does illogically make me want to firebomb the doc's office. (just kidding!) (sort of!)

No tears today. Apparently it's anger day!
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Old 10-18-2006, 03:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanmommy View Post
The Dr said we could certainly try clomid in a few months if I want, and that he would probably want to try progesterone suppositories first. He said that if you ovulate on your own there is actually evidence that you are les likely to get pg on clomid. I had never heard this but I think it is prudent to give it some time to research it.
Interesting, oceanmommy. It made me start looking for this evidence. Will you let me know if you find anything?

And Tenk. I'm sorry about the BFN.
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Old 10-18-2006, 04:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Anon--FF said this to you??

I was hoping POAS would bring you some peace. Hang in there sweetie.
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Old 10-18-2006, 04:32 PM
 
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Ok, so I was talking to my mom about it and she asked me which one I used, I just happened to find peeonastick.com and the one I used was a CVS (cassette) and those detect at 50mIU so she suggested that I get an Early Response and test in the morning instead since I'm only 1 day late and I used one that needed so much HCG in the urine. So in conclusion to my sogga, I will use a name brand tomorrow morning, and post again...let's hope it's not a BFN again, and if it is then HOLY CRAP AF needs to show up ASAP so that I can start taking Clomid :

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Old 10-18-2006, 05:00 PM
 
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HopesMom - Yes, FTF actually printed that on the screen! How is that helpful?!?!? Or maybe they just haven't met my doc's office yet.... I told DH and he said, um, so what if you are pregnant? And I said, well, I guess I'll need a blood test to confirm that and I can't have one so I guess we're SOL.

I think he is very convinced I am. I wish I could be too.

Tenk: hang in there! Here's hoping!
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Old 10-18-2006, 05:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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NOT helpful at all, Anon! :
How long before you are "late" by your doc's standards? And I was also wondering if they were any other places you could go for a blood test? Are there any pregnancy centers nearby??
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