I guess I'm not sure if I am allowed to post in here since I'm not the one pregnant.
I'm one of the moms, but my girlfriend is the pregnant one. We already have 2 older daughters. i was much more active on here when my last daughter was little & I loved the help & info I got here so this was the place I thought of to come back to. I just wasn't sure if the Due Date Clubs were only for the moms who were pregnant or not. I'm fine if they are & will utilize the other parts of the boards plenty anyhow, but thought I would check here.
You are a parent to be, so of course you are welcome! During my last pregnancy, there were a couple of partners who would post occasionally, and no one batted an eye at it.
i tend to be a little on the over cautious side when first poking my nose in a room. i'm the shy at first type so figured better to ask than assume, but did doubt it would be an issue.
Hi, Mercury! I'm going to go ahead and say that if I'm allowed, you are too, and I have already decided to assume I'm allowed--oops? I am usually similarly cautious and have been on other threads, but I definitely feel that as women about to go through (albeit not directly) a pregnancy that will lead to the birth of our babies, we belong in our due date club!
I posted my intro on the "introduce ourselves" thread, but the parts that are relevant for you: we are (hopefully!!!!) having our first child after 10 IUIs and 2 IVFs (including this one), $35k and 3 years of TTC, with one other pregnancy that ended in miscarriage at 10 weeks. My partner is always the gestational parent. What's different this time is that we used my eggs. (I have my own fertility issues, but I am younger and have a higher AMH that hopefully means higher egg quality that hopefully means a baby).
So, while I have more of a biological "right" to feel involved in this pregnancy, I have always felt extremely involved in every cycle, and posted on TTC boards throughout our first 11 cycles, even before my body was involved as the egg source. Not all partners feel that involved or identify with the process, I have learned, but I definitely deeply feel everything we go through (except for the physical symptoms of pregnancy, of course). My wife and I are very close, and we have a very equal relationship, so maybe that helps?
That said, I work hard to give her the space in our relationship to be The One Experiencing the Pregnancy, and try to never presume or take over the experience. I also give her internet space (she posts on another website when she wants to). So being "the Rock" for my wife, when I am just as nervous and anxious and hopeful as she is--okay, let's be honestly, probably even more anxious!--is a lot easier when I have a place I can go to obsess or vent or share the process that doesn't take anything away from her, or any other gestational AND biological mothers. (Which means I will not be taking up space in conversations that are really important for gestational moms to have just for themselves.)
You and I are both going to be mothers (you already are!) so we belong! Welcome!
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