just wondering if any have gone to great lengths to save for IVF when the insurance co. won't even recognize infertility as a disease process? Thinking of ditching our house because we can't save any $$ here(and we'd be angering our uncle who bought the house), to move in with my mom and dad so we could save for $30K worth of IVF in two years.
has anyone moved back into the parents house with a spouse and had it work out?
Mom to DS 12/07 and DD 11/13, plus a bunch of chickens, dogs, and cats.
Moving past many years of infertility and always thinking of my friends in the infertility forums.
I'm in a similar situation but not quite, we have some land and we had some money to build a house we were living with my parents while the house was supposed be built , house money turned into IVF money, so we are going to live with my parents for a few more years, my mom loves having us here and I get along with them pretty well, so for us it worked out, at the end of the day I rather have a baby than a house. And I kind of love the idea of having my mom right here when the baby is born.
Mommy to our Twin Miracles born on 29/1/12
I live in CT so state mandates to cover, with exeptions off course,,,to bad I work for religion organization and DH for tribe so none of us get the coverage,,,I am trying IUI right know, I will pay w credit card, but for more serious treatment I am planning to change the job,,,and if I would live in state which doesn't cover I would move to another state....I am jus thinking that if you will get deep in debt and finaly will have a baby and then will have to work 24h per day to pay off you wont be able to enjoy something you was waiting for so long...
Have you looked into ARC (advanced reproductive care)? We didn't end up using them, but would have if it had come to that. They allow you to work out a payment plan and in some cases, you can even purchase "insurance" in case the procedure doesn't work, and you get a portion of your investment back, though it isn't so cheap. There are a lot of very reputable clinics that work with them.
We moved back in with my folks, partially to afford IUI and my laparoscopy (out of network), and partially because I wanted to be able to finish school after the baby was born, without having to work. It hasn't been easy, though we definitely have some other issues at play that complicate the situation (mom has mental health issues, family isn't willing to 'change their lives for your baby', ugh). Aside from the issues which are unique to our situation, I will say this - the loss of the independence of our family, and the loss of having my own space and my own home in which to raise my child, has been more difficult than I imagined it would be, and is something I grieve over often. I suspect it would have been the same even if my mom was healthier or the rest of my family more accommodating, though maybe to a lesser degree.
That being said, if this is really your only option, I really believe that anything is worth building your family. But if there was a way to do it and maintain your independence (like ARC), I would do all you could to do that.
Good luck mama . . . .
L, student nurse and married to A, my union man. Happy parents to little S!
My sister opted to not do IVF after several years of other treatments. She found an actual adoption loan that was low interest. I have another friend who re-financed her mortgage at a lower rate and added the extra cash for IVF. My sister had friends saving for adoption that sold one of their cars, didn't buy any new furniture, cancelled cable etc. Another turned in her leased vehicle for one that was $3000-4000 total instead of paying $500 every month. Good luck whatever you decide.
Leslie, mama to Paige 8, Zara 3 and Audrey, Sophia & Nina June 7/11 @32.6
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