how do you get through the hard days? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 4 Old 07-26-2011, 11:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Sometimes I have days when I just don't know how I can possibly go on. I just feel so depressed and weepy and hormonal (from all the fertility medications I'm taking) that I simply can't bring myself to accomplish anything. I might lose my job if I keep having days like this.... and I don't even care.

 

Can some of you others who are dealing with infertility give me advice? How do you get through days like this?

 

If I had other kids already I'm sure that focusing on how much I love the ones I have would help me... but I have none. My life is empty.


Me (32), married to DH (35)

3 years of TTC #1, M/C @ 6wks in May 2013 angel1.gif
Mom to Liliana born May 8 2014 bfinfant.gif
mdcblog5.gif www.babythehardway.com

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#2 of 4 Old 07-27-2011, 09:56 AM
 
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Sourire hug2.gif

 

I've been in the dark place you're currently in and the hardest part seems to be coming out of it.  Just try to remember that Clomid is a wicked drug that's contributing GREATLY to your feeling this down.... but it WILL pass.  Once in awhile it's okay to take a sick day (I like to call them mental health days) just to coddle yourself for a bit, but don't let it get to the point where you start losing focus of everything else in your life.  Consider work a good distraction to get your mind off things, otherwise you'll focus TOO much on your hardships and you'll wallow deeper into the pain.

 

I know it's cliche, but take it one step at a time.  Take care of yourself, you deserve to be pampered and spoiled right now.  Take a bubble bath, watch a sad movie or read a book about someone's life that was far worse than yours (that seems to help me more than happy movies that make me want to puke :-P).  Ask your dh to give you a head rub or back massage, but tell yourself inside that you WILL get through this.  You WILL overcome this.  Everything in life happens for a reason and you don't always know why things are playing out the way they are (and you may never know).  Maybe you're not yet blessed with a child because there's something about having a child now that would cause you MORE pain than not having one.  Or maybe your child is meant to be born later, because the person he or she will one day fall in love with is still not born yet.  Destiny has its plans.  You never know what the universe has in store or why things happen the way they do... but there IS a bigger picture.  Just have faith that all will happen the way it's supposed to happen.  


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#3 of 4 Old 07-27-2011, 10:40 AM
 
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I have been there!! There were days I would not get out of bed.  After realzing how depressed I was, I went to my doctor for help.  I am now on a low dose of Prozac & Wellburtin.  It has made all the difference in the world.  My doctor said that it was normal for those going through infertility to go through phases of depression.  Like PP said, clomid is a strong drug and it will impact you.

 

hug2.gif take care of yourself!


Lynne (35) wife to DH (38) mom to DD (9) ** TTC # 2 since 7/07 ** m/c 6/23/10** 2 Failed IVF rounds... moving forward on adoption; Paperwork/home study complete, waiting on a birth mom to 'pick' us

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#4 of 4 Old 07-27-2011, 12:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the advice both of you.

 

The good news is that next month I am taking a break from Clomid, so I'm sure that will help. And I am feeling MUCH better today than I was yesterday (I cried all day yesterday) because I spent the evening doing yoga and meditating, and then I went to bed early. I guess I should try to take better care of myself to avoid feeling depressed.


Me (32), married to DH (35)

3 years of TTC #1, M/C @ 6wks in May 2013 angel1.gif
Mom to Liliana born May 8 2014 bfinfant.gif
mdcblog5.gif www.babythehardway.com

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