~~INFERTILITY ONE THREAD FEBRUARY 2012~~ - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 299 Old 02-03-2012, 03:51 PM
 
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Just quickly catching up tonight, and I don't have much time, but....

 

joy.gifWISSA!!! So excited for you!!!! When I opened the page and saw your name with all the smiley faces I almost jumped up and down. :) Hooray!!

 

Gozal, I'll be thinking of you over the next few days--I am hoping and hoping that your temps stay up and your LP goes straight into 18+ days of high temps, so you can get a quick and solid BFP. I totally get not wanting to POAS but wait for temps. Sometimes that just feels much easier. Thinking of you!

 

Everyone else--aack, I'm so behind! I am finally starting to feel human again after being sick for a week, and I'm in the boring (waiting to ovulate) part of the cycle, so I definitely need to do a follow up post and do personals. But I am thinking of you all and hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!


Me (30) and DH (33). I have "Lean" PCOS with IR -- started Metformin 10/2011.  
Finally got our BFP  4-16-12! Welcomed our son into the world naturally on 12-12-12. 6lbs 8 oz, 21.5in at 38+1 weeks.
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#62 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 04:02 AM
 
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Just popping in quickly to say...

 

YAH WISSA!!! CONGRATS!! jumpers.gif

 

Gozal, I'm ANXIOUSLY waiting to have the opportunity to say congrats to you too. Can't wait until next week to hear the news! BIG HUGS!

 

Everyone else, let's keep the trend going!!!

 

 


Attempted induction at 38 weeks; ended up with a c-section.

In love with my baby boy Colin and baby girl Sienna!

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#63 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 09:44 AM
 
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Wissa- Congrats! Those are both beautiful numbers. Everyone else- Here's hoping the leap year brings some luck. (It's an extra day for possible BFPs).


Mama to my twin butterfly boys, Alan and Bruce, who passed away at 22 weeks gestation (3/24/12): Forever in Our Hearts. Our rainbow baby girl, my little bud of Hope,  joined our butterfly boys and Grandma Jan 1/31/13 at 9 weeks gestation. Love you so much. Next step: triadadopt.jpg
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#64 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 11:29 AM
 
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Well for all those wondering how long the trigger shot stays in your system... for me it was 9 days. Ive been doing OPKs every day since the trigger and this morning was the first time I didn't see a 2nd line at all.

Me (32), married to DH (35)

3 years of TTC #1, M/C @ 6wks in May 2013 angel1.gif
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#65 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 11:47 AM - Thread Starter
 
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wissa - YAY!!! Wissa that's great news! Congrats! Now I need to add you to the graduates :)

 

Sourire - I think the follie was trying to catch up, but my numbers have been better than other cycles since, so maybe the longer cycle is better! Thanks for the luck. That's good to know about the trigger and OPKs. I hope you'll be seeing second lines again a few days, but on the other kind of tests!

 

gozal - I totally understand about not wanting to test again. It's so hard to see those BFNs. It wouldn't surprise me if those emotions are from pregnancy hormones. I have a very good feeling. I hope things become more clear soon.

 

cbaa - done and done :)

 

brichole - I'm glad you have a set schedule! Here's to a new cycle!

 

chica - I'm glad you're feeling better! Have a good weekend.

 

renavoo - I agree, let's keep this trend up! We need lots of BFPs!

 

deborah - thanks for the extra luck!

 

 

AFM, just got back from IUI #2 and wow am I in pain. My cervix was high up yesterday and today and both doctors had a hard time getting to it. Yesterday she found a long enough speculum, but today he pinched my cervix and pulled it forward. I'm not going to lie, tears definitely made an appearance. It stings like crazy and I'm having a hard time sitting down. The doctor who performed the procedure today was kind of a jerk and a little rough, which didn't make things easier. The good news is that both dp and I got the best numbers we've ever had for a cycle. His sperm count was crazy high and his motility was 98%. My numbers for yesterday and today were...

 

Estrogen - yesterday = 448, today = 164

LH - yesterday = 93, today = 32

Progesterone - yesterday = 5.7, today =6.7

 

My follicle had also burst between yesterday and today, which hadn`t happened in my other IUI cycles. I hope I get to be part of this BFP trend! Here comes the 2ww. Now I`m off to go tux shopping with dp and his guys.


Nikki crochetsmilie.gif, partner to Jeremy guitar.gif. Baby Joshua Nolan is finally here after a many year struggle with infertility. I blog at www.loliecraft.blogspot.com. dog2.gifcat.gifhamster.jpghamster.jpg

 

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#66 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 12:14 PM
 
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shesaidboom- all sounds like good news! What will you be doing to distract yourself this 2ww?

 

Sourire & Gozal- looking forward to twin BFPs from you both in a few days... good to know about the trigger btw.

 

chica- glad you are feeling better, colds are the worst.

 

 


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#67 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 02:57 PM
 
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Congrats Wissa!!!!

 

 


Early childhood teacher TTC #1 after 3 early losses ribbonpb.gif.ribbonpb.gifribbonpb.gif My chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/Tickletoes

My blog: http://mappingoutmotherhood.blogspot.com/

 

 

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#68 of 299 Old 02-04-2012, 03:18 PM
 
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Wissa!!! I am so super excited for you - congratulations!!!!

 

Gozal - I'm hoping we hear the same from you. I'm totally on board with not checking. Better to be pleasantly surprised than definitely disappointed.

 

Shesaidboom - keeping my fingers crossed for you as well.

 

Welcome KandJ and Marmo!

 

I really thought I'd be able to keep up with you all while I was away, but I had terrible internet connection (no wi-fi where I was staying - boo!) so I fell totally behind. I've caught up in reading though - can't believe how much activity there's been!

 

AFM: Well, cbaa - we're not exactly cycle buddies this round. I'm currently CD5, so I'll be taking my third dose of Femara tonight. My RE upped the dosage to 5mg/day from the 2.5 of last month. He wants me back in for monitoring next Thursday (CD10) because my follie grew so fast last month and I ended up triggering/IUI'ing on CD12. They counted about 10 follies on both sides. I thought it was weird that I ended up with another 31 day cycle (like last month) since I triggered two days earlier - anyone else think that's weird? Unfortunately, the dreaded Femara headache has decided to settle in tonight which is unfortuante as I have a paper to write. Sigh. Knees are feeling creaky too which is new for me, but I know some of the other Femara users on here have mentioned joint issues. Feeling really hopeful for our thread and BFPs.... can't wait to hear of our next graduate! Now, it's time for me to stop procrastinating and start writing!!!

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#69 of 299 Old 02-05-2012, 01:32 PM
 
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Could you add a blurb for me?  THanks! 

Me, age 31  Dh, age 36  Trying to conceive #2 since 3/10, unexlpained secondary infertility.  Tried 4 rounds of clomid, beginning Femara/ovidrel and good old fashioned bd 2/12

 

I'm new here, but wanted to join in on congratulating you, Wissa!!  That's so exciting, and encouraging!!  I'm hoping it catches on, and bfp's start popping up all over the place!

 

Gozal, I totally understand.  I tell myself that every month, but totally give in every month, too.  Not this month!  I'm tired of wasting my money on bad news I already sorta know.  Because of charting, I knew I was pregnant before testing last time.  But since that ended in a miscarriage, I also feel like I need to know asap, so I can get in to get numbers.  in the end, I just really wish that I, or anyone else, just got to have fun getting pg, and that the only worry was the due date or something like that.

 

Thank you for the welcome, everyone.  It feels good to have somewhere to go to be a little obsessive, and I DEFINITELY value everyone's knowledge and advice.  Af finally showed up, 2 days late.  That's ok, I got to start Femara today.  It's my first monitered/femara/ovidrel cycle.  We're not doing iui, yet.  I don't think we can even afford it, but honestly, I'm not sure how much it even is.  Something to ask next time I'm in, I guess.

This is kinda silly, but is anyone into tarot cards?  My husband has recently gotten into them, and when I got pg this summer, that came up clearly in the cards.  And the morning I went in to find out we lost the baby, that was in the cards too.  Lately, they've been vague, and haven't said anything positive as far as conceiving.  I am trying to brush it off and tell myself not to take them seriously.  But dang it if it's not bothering me.  I am going to try to start thinking more positively, and stay away from cards and other things that make me feel hopeless.  Just kinda curious if anyone else is into tarot cards, etc.

 

 


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#70 of 299 Old 02-05-2012, 01:57 PM
 
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Shesaidboom - It all really does sound good for you this cycle! I hope you are feeling better and that the pain from the procedure is gone!

 

Gozal - Your chart is looking AWESOME! I'm really hopeful for you. Looking at your chart from last cycle it was similar and then your temp started to go down on 12dpo so I'm rooting for tomorrow!

 

Marmo - I think I kind of missed when you popped in a a few days ago, so welcome! I think we are going to do a monitored cycle (Clomid) before IUI too (even though IUI has been recommended). Good luck! I do my best to stay away from things that don't bring light into my life. My mantra the past few days has been " By all means, everyday, be happy and free."

 

Teresa - Hope the headache is better! Do they go away after you finish your last dose?

 

AFM - So I've been listening to a lot of IF podcasts this weekend (lately from Creating A Family). I was wondering if anyone has read the book Budgeting For Infertility: How to Bring Home A Baby Without Breaking the Bank by Evelina Sterling and Angie Best-Boss? I listened to a podcast where the author was the guest and I'm interested. I would have to buy it though. None of the libraries around me have it boo! Still waiting for AF. Today is 6 days since ending Provera. Cramps for a few days but nothing.


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 brokenheart.gifbrokenheart.gif God has answered our prayers & we welcomed our baby girl earth side 11/24/13 h20homebirth.gif

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#71 of 299 Old 02-05-2012, 04:52 PM
 
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Teresa- not too far off though. Sorry you have the dreaded headache& creaky joints. My joints are ok so far but mine didnt start til te 2ww last time. That is weird about the long cycle though... Was it your first medicated cycle? Maybe the femara extended your lp.

Marmo- im glad AF held out so you could start femara this time. Did your RE have anything to say at your appt? I dont do tarot, but that is nterestin. I hope if you keep following the cards you have pregnancy in there soon.

Sila- come on AF! I like your mantra & i'm glad your DH is coopertive & wants to prove his swimmers can do better. Positive outlook on both fronts is everything. I downloaded some guided IF meditation podcasts, but I never reall yfollowed through with them. Are you learning anything interesting?

AFM- CD 12 monitoring tomorrow. Still getting off & on headaces. Relaxing as much as possible watching the Superbowl... Hard to relax when my nerves are going AHHHHHH. Go Pats! joy.gif

C + B + 10y together, 5y married, 4y TTC= endometriosis, Hashimoto's thyroiditis, recurrent miscarriages
IVF 1/6/13 angel.gif @10w , FET 5/21/13 angel3.gif @7w, IVF 10/11/13 angel.gif @5w, FET 2/2/14 angel.gif @5w
Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.
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#72 of 299 Old 02-05-2012, 05:25 PM
 
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I had a dream 3 nights ago that me and DH had twins a boy and a girl....it was a wonderful dream other than the fact that we knew EXACTLY what we were going to name the boy but couldn't agree on a girls name to save our lives and they wouldn't let us leave the hospital without having a name for her on a birth certificate lol.  It was very frustrating.  Which, last night i had a dream that DH and one of my good friends had been seeing each other behind my back and came to me and told me that she was pregnant.  I was devistated because in the dream he had told me that he didn't want anymore kids with me...then one of my guy co-workers kicked his butt and helped me go thru my divorce processes lol.  TOTALLY having crazy dreams on this Celexa but at least AF is here FULL FORCE and is hopefuly on her way to being gone for the next 9 months!!!!!  (I hope that is the case anyways!)  Anyone into reading into dreams?  LOL I'd like to know what those two dreams are telling me.  I know that i woke up mad as hell at DH about the second dream.  Which i guess could more be a nightmare than a dream.   I guess it could be some inner fears coming out that i might want to sit down and talk to dh about.  I don't know that i ever think he would cheat on me with a friend but of course with our past and how they always say that the past will repeat itself i can't help but think that that second dream has me thinking that me might try to hook up with someone again and that he might actually succeed in getting another woman pregnant much quicker than we get pregnant together.  I don't know, blah i'm just typing out how i'm feeling i guess...maybe i really should start a daily journal that i keep at home of how i'm feeling and the fears i have in life.  I know that i feel much better once i get them out....i think that would be a great therapy for me.  I hope that everyone has had a great weekend!!! About to get back to watching the super bowl now...come on pat's keep it up!!! 


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#73 of 299 Old 02-05-2012, 06:39 PM
 
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Gemmine, cbaa, monkey, smiles, sourire, sila, bichole, gozal, chica, teresa, deborah, renavoo, tickletoes, marmo, shesaidboom thank you all for the Congrats, etc.  It means a lot to me.  I haven't been on this thread as long as some of you, but your support has really helped me.  I hope to hear good news from all you soon.

 

Gozal - I understand what you mean about testing.  Long ago I bought one pregnancy test.  I promised myself I wasn't going to use it until I knew it was going to be positive.  I decided that I would never test until AF was late and I had pregnancy symptoms.   Not testing really did help me deal with the IF emotional roller-coaster.  IF is cruel.  You get you're  hopes up time after time...you get so close, but never get what you're after...

 

bichole - yay for a new month!!  Maybe now that your schedule is stable your body will get with it too.  I don't know about your dreams, but I think dreams do sometimes reflect our fears and hopes.  Maybe even our deepest thoughts we're afraid to voice when we are awake.  Writing out your thoughts and feelings is a great idea!  It can be very therapeutic.

 

Sila - Hope AF gets here soon and you start the next steps in your journey.

 

teresaresa - I hope you get good results from increasing the femara.  I'm postive that's what did the trick for me.  I think I may have mentioned this before, but epsom salt baths made all the sore joints from femara go away for me. 

 

Shesaidboom - you numbers keep looking good.  Sorry that doctor was a jerk.  Like dealing with IF isn't enough! 

 

Marmo - I hope you get good results from the femara.  I guess you can see it work for me.  I don't believe in tarot cards, etc.  I'm too religous for them.  However, I do believe in positive attitudes.  I had been kind of telling myself that if I didn't get a bfp it was ok and I could live with it.  I was sending myself mixed messages because I was tired of hurting.  Yet, this past month I started telling my self everyday I want a baby.  I'm ready for baby.  and well...I don't know that it really helped, but sometimes I wonder if our thought impact what our bodies do.

 

Chica - Hope you O! It may be the boring part, but it's very important

 

Cbaa - Sending you thoughts of big mature follicles! 

 

deborah - beautiful.  That exactly how the nurse described the numbers.  Of course, I wonder if she had any idea of how very beautiful they were to me.

 

 

Me - I'm still not really believing and a little worried about something going wrong...after so long (2.5 years) I just can't help it.  I go back on Friday for more tests.  I kinda of wish I could go in sooner just to know if the beta is rising.

 

 

FYI - You guys remember the making babies book.  It suggested I drink warm water with lemon in the morning...I never missed glass one morning this cycle.  lol

 

 

 


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#74 of 299 Old 02-05-2012, 07:35 PM
 
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Wissa- Such a great feeling, but I can understand the worrying. Staying positive is so important though. Do whatever you can to make that happen!


Mama to my twin butterfly boys, Alan and Bruce, who passed away at 22 weeks gestation (3/24/12): Forever in Our Hearts. Our rainbow baby girl, my little bud of Hope,  joined our butterfly boys and Grandma Jan 1/31/13 at 9 weeks gestation. Love you so much. Next step: triadadopt.jpg
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#75 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 03:11 AM
 
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Oooh here's to hoping for more BFPs. Souirie and Shesaidboom, we're waiting (Gozal, for you too...haha. waiting but perhaps a bit impatient. orngbiggrin.gif)

 

By the way, Shesaidboom, um OW. But I'm glad that the signs were there and that it sounds like an optimal time to have done the IUI. 

 

Sila, that's an interesting book...I wish I heard of it before i started this journey. I didn't and we ended up breaking the bank but in the end, but in the end, it will be worth it. But still, it would have been nice to save a little money.

 

Cbaa, hope the appointment goes well today! Let us know how everything looks. I'm not even a fan of football (or sports in general because I hate it when anyone loses) but yesterday was a nail biter. haha DH is a huge fan (his foster brother was an NFL player) and he was watching while I was just planning on snuggling next to him. I ended up putting my head under the blankets during some of the especially harrowing parts. ;o)

 

Marmo and Teresa, Yah for getting started. Before you know it, you'll be in the 2ww with hopefully, good news at the end! We're watching out for you and hoping this is your month! Marmo, I don't know anything about Tarot cards but i agree that it's probably best to stay away from anything that would make you feel any stress. 

 

Brichole, ugh to the dream (although the first one was good haha). DH and I found that picking a boy's name was easy but we're still up in the air about the name for the girl. :o) It would be funny if you were faced with that issue in the near future! boy and girl twins! As for the second dream, I'm sure that as wissa says, it could be a reflection of your fears (just like the first one is one of your hopes.) Don't let it get you too down. Just continue to be your wonderful cheerful self and hopefully, this month, you'll get your BFP! 

 

Wissa, I still get really nervous and anxiously wait for tests. I think it's normal, especially considering how long we have been trying. But definitely try as much as possible to revel in this wonderful event. My friend, who first got pregnant at 38 and now has 2 beautiful girls once said to me that we just have to think that whatever happens, it's just meant to be. That's how she talked herself off the ledge because she was also quite stressed. Just take care of yourself, mom to be! 


Attempted induction at 38 weeks; ended up with a c-section.

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#76 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 06:45 AM
 
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Brichole- Can I ask if you've had to deal with infidelity in the past with dh?  This summer, right before I got pregnant, I found out my dh was talking to two different women online.  They were out of state, and it was brief, but it was devastating to our marriage.  Add to that ttc for a year and a half at that time, and the miscarriage, and I was a pretty big mess for a while.  It still is a very big hurt, all of it.  But I am pulling myself out of if, and dh and I are working hard on our marriage, and things are good with us.  He read The Five Languages of Love, and I am going to read it too, and already I can see a major change in him.  I'm sorry if my question to you is too personal or painful, it's just that if it happens to many other women struggling ttc, I don't see it talked about a whole lot. 

 

Shesaidboom- I missed your post about the pain from the procedure, YOWCH! I hope you're feeling better now! 

 

And thanks, everyone, for reminding me to focus on a positive attitude. Sometimes it feels like steering a great big ship around the opposite way.  But in reality, life IS GOOD, and I can and will focus on that.  It IS true that a healthy mind/spirit results in a healthier body.  When I am positive, I even eat better, and treat my body better (exercise, rest, etc)  It makes me a little sad that dd has had to deal with me as a mom, I haven't been focused and present with her.  But I am CHANGING that, and LOVING how positively it's already impacting my relationship with her.

 

Babydust to all!!


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#77 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 06:58 AM
 
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shesaidboom - having a doctor pull your cervix down sounds absolutely horrific! I think only a male doctor could do such a thing because they have no idea what it feels like.

teresa - I've noticed that if I O a few days earlier or later the length of my LP sometimes changes a bit to compensate so that my total cycle length is almost the same. Of course that was before I started progesterone, now the progesterone controls the length of my LP. Why did they increase your Femara dosage if your follicles were already growing super fast on the lower dose?

Marmo - last March I was in New Orleans and I thought it would be fun to have a fortune teller read my fortune with tarot cards. I went to see 2 different fortune tellers and one of them said I would get pregnant by that summer (obviously that didn't happen) and the other said I may never have kids (too depressing to even think about)! Anyways for my own sanity I've decided not to believe in that stuff. I've read the 5 Love Languages too and I think it's great. Now I just have to convince DH to read it.

Sila - I hope AF shows up soon. How long did you take Provera for?

brichole - probably best to forget about those nightmares as quickly as possible. If my nightmares came true, most of my family would be drug addicts or they would have died in horrible accidents. I just try to feel thankful they're not true at all and all my family members are alive and well.

wissa - it's time for the post-BFP interview! Could you recap for us your entire TTC journey and everything you tried, especially with your BFP cycle? By the way I reserved the Making Babies book at the library after I read your last post.

Gozal - so when is AF due for you? I'm quite excited to hear how things go. After I got my 100% negative OPK on Saturday I took another one on Sunday morning (9 DPO) and had a faint line. I don't think it means anything but I know you had a similar experience with the HPTs so if you get a BFP I will allow myself to be hopeful!

Me (32), married to DH (35)

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#78 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 08:49 AM
 
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Oh, you guys! It is so amazing to have you all rooting for me so hard! Seriously, it keeps me going. Thank you. I'll be 14dpo on Wed. (midday, to be precise) and usually get my period 15dpo, so Thursday. On my discharge instructions it says to come for a beta on Fri. if I haven't gotten my period. 

 

Sila, you totally rock for checking out my chart! I have to admit I was super excited by my high temp yesterday - I've never had a 99F (well,except when I'm sick and have a fever). Albeit I did sleep about an hour later than usual yesterday and I didn't adjust it down. So of course I was (okay, am) upset that today's 12dpo was not so great. As you noticed I've had a few nice 11dpo temps onto to begin The Plunge on 12dpo. However, I'm trying not to read too much into it because I had a bad night's sleep and woke up early. Actually I often will temp twice a morning, because I usually wake up right around dawn. Normally I'll fall back asleep, but sometimes I need to get up to go to the bathroom or whatever and then I can't fall asleep, so I take my temp first just in case. In most cases I'll wake up 2-3 hours later and take my temp again and use that one. So far it seems to be reliable, but I don't really know. Well, yesterday's dawn temp was not too far off from today's dawn temp (which is my only temp since I didn't get back to sleep, so I adjusted it). So...trying not to obessess. I'm really considering giving up temping as well as testing, as long as I'm being monitored. I just feel ridiculous that my mood is so dependent on a temperature data point (well, what it represents really, but you know what I mean).

 

Wissa - Those numbers are beyond fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!! So excited for you and hope to hear lots more great stuff this week from you!

 

Sourire, I am copying you with the infertility blog reading. What a great way to get inspired. You can probably imagine how much I hope I get to give you hope - I am praying for twin BFPs for us. (As in, our BFPs come in a near-pair!)

 

Smiles - I didn't realize we are nearly cycle buddies too! What's going on in yout cycle this time?

 

cbaa, so you're onto your last femara cycle, right? Praying hard that this is the one for you. Have you had a sit-down with your doctor lately? Me being plan-y again but I want answers for you! Or hypotheses anyway!

 

Sila - how long are you supposed to wait after stopping the prometrium? I am feeling very impatient for you. ;) 

 

Shesaidboom - yikes, I've never even heard of such a thing - I hope you are feeling better - OUCH! A way long time ago I had one abnormal pap and had to have a coloposcopy (thank G-d, everything was fine) and I totally saw stars and nearly passed out. The doctor (a woman, btw) acted like it was no big deal, all "you can hop down now" - say what?

 

Chica, waiting to o isn't the boring part, it's the hopeful part! (Just joking, of course, I know everyone experiences it in their own way.) Hope you are feeling completely better by now.

 

Teresa, are you all through with the femera by now? How did it treat you over the last few days?

 

Marmo, I'm so sorry to hear what you've been going through. IF has ultimately brought me and my husband closer together than ever, but believe me, there have been (many) moments when I've wondered if if it would tear us apart. I still often wonder if we will ever be able to be intimate without flashbacks to timed intercourse. You're right, there is so much that people don't talk about...the marital strains of this...miscarriage for sure...what it's like to have people around you assume you are choosing not to have children or more children. I admire you for your honesty. By the way, I often worry that I am not being as focused and present with DS as I would like to be/think he deserves.It takes a lot of energy to keep my emotions at bay all day long, and sometimes I get myself busy doing something so I won't worry him by seeming sad. I certainly don't mind teaching him that grown-ups are subject to emotions too, just the opposite, it's very important. But I dno't think it's right to burden him, either. I worry that this another thing IF is robbing me of, time just spent enjoying life with DS. I know it's up to me to choose to be joyful and most of the time, I do and can. But I've been at this a long time, 2.5 years already of longing. I don't think there's anyway psychologically to NOT be affected by it profoundly. 

 

Brichole, I agree with the others who think your dreams are an expression of your hopes and worries. My mom has this theory that pregnancy dreams just mean you have to pee! I hope that you'll have the problem of choosing baby names very, very soon!

 

Oh, and Renavoo, I have the same sports team problem as you do. :) Now though I do root for DH's teams - why not, it makes him happy!


Me + DH + DS ('07) + after a long and bumpy road, thrilled that our twin boys are finally here (DS2 & DS3, '12)

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#79 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 12:42 PM
 
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Holy meltdown! Today at work I had a panic attack in front of my boss, my boss's boss, and my boss's boss's boss.... awkward!!!! God I hate taking progesterone!!!!!!

Me (32), married to DH (35)

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cbaa - How did your follies look today? Most of what I have learned from the podcasts I already know, but I enjoy hearing the specialists and I have learned even more! Another one I like is Redefining Fertility if you are interested. I will have to look for the guided meditations! Do you remember what it was called and is it on itunes? My DH is very positive. He's doing intensive acupuncture for the next 4 weeks then he wants to (and the acupuncturist wants to) do another SA to see if his motility has improved at all. 

 

Brichole - Gah I love/hate baby dreams. Mostly because it all seems so perfect until I wake up. I've been having crazy crazy dreams too interesting.

 

Wissa - I've been drinking warm water with lemon for the past 2 weeks! I had totally forgotten about it (my first acupuncturist had told me to do it) but remembered when my tummy was feeling funny a while ago. I'll definitely be keeping it up now! Love, love, love, your 1 test story. I'm going to copy you. I have 1 FRER and I'm only going to use it when I know it will be positive. I rarely test anyways, I'm just saying I won't be buying any more.

 

renavoo - I'm really tempted to buy it! I mean maybe that $16 could save me hundreds or thousands...

 

Marmo - That's the spirit! Jump right on the positivity train! Love and light!

 

Sourire - I took Provera (10mg) for 7 days. Last Monday was my last dose. So it's been 1 week. Commmme on AF! When's your Beta/are you doing one? Hope you are feeling better since your meltdown!

 

Gozal - I saw your temp this morning. But I'm glad you validated it away for me/you haha. Another reason why charting makes us crazy. I've never been able to not chart. Because it's the one and only way I can know I actually ovulated. Now that I will be monitored I most likely will stop temping after O. I'm looking forward to it! When is your Beta/are you doing one? The nurse at the RE said AF usually comes 5-7 days after stopping the Provera. Sometimes up to 10. Well today is 7. Of course I Googled and found stories of it taking 14 days for quite a few people.

 

AFM - I have an appointment with a new RE March 19th (SO FAR AWAY!). We most likely won't be doing IUI until I'm with the new RE because he is in our insurance network and will bill our insurance so we can buy some time and not have to keep shelling out cash. So once I ever start a cycle we'll be doing at least one monitored cycle on Clomid. Miracles do happen! Ugh I get pretty intense for like an hour then they are gone.  I get sad when I wipe and nothing is there. It feels like labor, like I'm just having practice AF cramps but she will come eventually.

 

 

 

 

 

 


Married to my love stillheart.gif, Mommy to W ('09) homebirth.jpg and Doula.

 brokenheart.gifbrokenheart.gif God has answered our prayers & we welcomed our baby girl earth side 11/24/13 h20homebirth.gif

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#81 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 05:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
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cbaa - I think wedding planning and volunteering are the only things keeping me sane right now. I am already getting impatient though.

 

teresaresa - Thank you for the crossed fingers!
I had the same thing happen on my second Femara/IUI cycle. I triggered on CD11 or 12. I'm sorry you've got the Femara headache. Take it easy and be good to yourself. I hope it goes away soon. I haven't gotten the headache, but I definitely have the joint issues. I hope this cycle brings you a BFP!

 

marmo - added your blurb :)
At my clinic where we do two IUI treatments each cycle, it's $420 the first treatment and $200 the second. The cost is actually for the sperm wash I believe.
I don't have experience with tarot cards, but I hope you do conceive soon even if it isn't shown in the cards! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for your first monitored cycle.
Your attitude is great, definitely an inspiration!

 

silamarila - thank you! my cervix is still sore, but it's much better. I was surprised this cycle because my IUIs had never been painful before, just a bit uncomfy.
I haven't heard of that book, but it sounds like something I'd like to read! Thanks for sharing. Could you ask your libraries to order it for you? I know our local libraries will often order a book if they don't have it.
When I took provera the first time it took about 8 days for AF to show up for me. I had expected it to work right away, but it definitely did not.

 

brichole - I've had a similar dream to yours about your dh cheating and getting another girl pregnant. I've had it a few times and it is really upsetting. I know dp would never do that, but I think it would be the absolute worst thing he could do. I'm sorry you've been having weird dreams and that they have been so upsetting. I hope that your dh would never do that, especially with everything you've been through. I'm glad you're able to get things out here.
I hope your AF is gone for 9 months too! I'm hoping this BFP trend keeps up and we all get ours this month.

 

wissa - It's understandable you'd be feeling that way, but it's still very exciting! I can't wait to hear your Friday update. I'm sure it'll be great news :)

 

renavoo - I hope I'm able to share some BFP news soon! I think this cycle was definitely our best so I hope that counts for something.

 

sourire - Oh, sourire, I'm so sorry about your panic attack. I get them often so I can definitely sympathize. I hope they were understanding and didn't make you feel any worse.
I was thinking the same thing about a male doctor being the only one to do that. I think a female doctor would be crying along with me. Dp said it probably felt like getting kicked in the balls.

 

Gozal - Does your clinic not do a beta even if you do get a period? Ours does because some women get breakthrough bleeding, which can be mistaken for a period. I cannot wait for your results!!
Thanks, I am feeling better but am still a bit sore. I hate that the doctor you had made it out like no big deal. That stuff is painful!!

 

 

AFM, oh how much I had this 2ww. I'm only a few days in and already cannot stand waiting. Thankfully no progesterone symptoms yet though.

 


Nikki crochetsmilie.gif, partner to Jeremy guitar.gif. Baby Joshua Nolan is finally here after a many year struggle with infertility. I blog at www.loliecraft.blogspot.com. dog2.gifcat.gifhamster.jpghamster.jpg

 

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#82 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 05:29 PM
 
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Sila- Come onnnnnnn AF, stop knocking and just come already. Go DH GO! I'm glad you have a great acupuncturist. I am listening to those podcasts you recommended now. I lost all of my podcasts when my computer crashed a few months ago but I can't remember which ones I liked. I have the Chopra center for wellbeing, Meditation for health, Meditation Oasis... but I don't recall loving any of them, probably why I didn't stick with it! They were from iTunes.

 

Wissa- I will start drinking warm water with lemon too. For a while I drank all my water with lemon, but it wasn't always warm and I didn't stick to it... I would also be interested in a recap of your journey and what you started diffently this cycle. Again, I'm so happy for you and little bean!

 

brichole- sorry about the crazy dreams! Do you think it is the celexa? I don't really read into those things but I hate how stressful they can be!

 

Sourire- Ohh the breakdowns, I hope you are feeling better. Even my boss when I had a meltdown a few months ago, mid meltdown, asked if I were pregnant yet... at the time it seemed inappropriate and insensitive... now I can see the clomid/progesterone combined literally made me a crazy person & I was freaking out about something silly. Just remind yourself it will all be worth it. It is possible the things you would have kept bottled up & before just sneak out when your inhibitions are effected with hormones, maybe they were meant to be addressed anyway!

 

Marmo- Yay for a positive attitude. There are always good things to focus on, sometimes they are just hard to find. I'm glad you are working on your relationship with DH. So hard to go through infertility but there is so much love & growth to be found when youare able to reconnect.

 

Gozal- I hope can't wait for Friday when your beta comes back positive. Are you feeling superstisious or do you have any symptoms to let us obsess over? I hope this is it for you, plleeeease. As far as the next step should there be one (which there likely will be)... I need a follow up with my RE a week after IUI for a chat. I am guessing Gonal-F but I'm not sure... I have a call in to the NaPro doctor, so I will probably have an appt there in April, which means learning the Creighton model and charting that, bloodwork every other day (I think) and getting off all my meds and some supplements. I think I'll only do 1 cycle of injections before calling this IF/RE game quits...

 

 

AFM: Ohhh follicles shamollicles. I have 5. Right side 14, 14, 10. Left side 11 & 11. Nobodys ready to make me a baby just yet, I go back Wednesday for another check. I will never understand these drugs and my reactions to them... Last month on day 12 with the same dose I had 1 follicle at 24 and my LH peaked on its own, this month, 5 itty bitty baby follicles. Anyone had a cycle canceled for over-stim? I'm worried if my 14s and 11s all grow that I will get cancelled... info/advice?

Estrogen: 16, LH: 4.1, Progesterone: 0.427- She never leaves my lining on the message.

As far as sports go- I am a 'fan' but not a 'superfan' meaning I care about the result & hype, but I'm not all that interested in the game itself. I played online solitaire and cooked lettuce wraps while 'watching' the game. I do however feel quite morose today... better about a stupid game than IF though, right? 


C + B + 10y together, 5y married, 4y TTC= endometriosis, Hashimoto's thyroiditis, recurrent miscarriages
IVF 1/6/13 angel.gif @10w , FET 5/21/13 angel3.gif @7w, IVF 10/11/13 angel.gif @5w, FET 2/2/14 angel.gif @5w
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#83 of 299 Old 02-06-2012, 06:29 PM
 
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marmo: so, I don’t personally know how to read tarot cards, but I definitely went through a period of a few months during which I saw several psychics. One who I really, really liked said that I would be pregnant in either June or July of this past year. He was wrong. I’m actually going to see a new person who works with tarot next week. I’m promising myself this will be the last time! I definitely believe in this sort of thing, but I also think that we make choices all the time that alter our path. So, just because you don’t see the baby in the cards right at this moment, doesn’t mean that it won’t be there. You make lots of choices everyday about your body, mind, and soul. Eventually, that right combination of choices is going to show you a baby in those cards. I’m sure of it!!!! Hang in there :)

SilaMarila: I still had the headaches for a few days after the last round of Femara, but they didn’t last into the 2ww. Hoping the same will be true this time around. I didn’t even know that there was such a thing as IF podcasts! I’m going to have to check them out. Any that you recommend? Ok, I know your waiting for AF story is frustrating and sad… but the practice AF cramps line was pretty darn funny!!! I’m excited you have an RE appointment with someone in-network – yay for getting some insurance relief!

cbaa2010: hi there! No, not my first medicated cycle, but it was my first on one Femara (did one Clomid prior). Just one more thing for me to obsess about :) Not sure about over-stim – I haven’t experienced that yet. I thought it was good to have multiple follies (I mean I know it increases chance of multiples, but I still thought it was good). What does of Femara are you on right now? Funny how our bodies react differently each time, right? And I mean funny in the “totally annoying and frustrating” way, not the “haha” way!

brichole1214: my therapist is really into dream analysis. Mostly what she has me focus on is how I was feeling within the dream. You mentioned in your post that your dream about DH left you feeling devastated. If I was trying to emulate my therapist, I would probably say that there is something in your relationship with DH that is making you feel let down (devastated is so strong a word!). I don’t think it means that you’re feeling like he’s going to cheat… you’re probably just acting out in your dream that sensation that a lot of us have about your DH not being as supportive of this process as you would like and feeling let down by that. As for the other girl in the dream getting pregnant right away, I think you just need to remind yourself of how beautiful, amazing, and perfect you are. Sounds like you aren’t telling yourself that enough. On the other hand, maybe I should not try to be my therapist – that’s why I’m paying her and not myself, right – haha!!

wissa: did the Making Babies book suggest the warm lemon water because of your type? Or was that a suggestion for all types?? I need to get that book asap!! Still doing my yippie hippie dippie dance for you!!!!

shesaidboom: ugh! Painful, painful, painful. Someone else mentioned having an abnormal pap smear. I had one of those too, and I went to two different docs who snipped pieces of my cervix. I have to say that the woman was a million times worse. She said something along the lines of, “what’s your problem?” while I had tears streaming down my face. I think sometimes the male doctors are more sensitive to it all since they know that they have NO idea how that stuff feels. I hope you don’t have to go through a rough IUI again!!!

Sourire: I love seeing your name, because it always makes me smile :) Interesting point about your O vs. LP. I was O’ing pretty regularly on the same day. This was the first time I was able to compare with the trigger shot. I probably need to relax and not overanalyze. Not sure why he upped the Femara. Maybe because I only had one follie on the 2.5mg. Or maybe to make me feel like we were moving forward and not doing the same thing over and over? Probably a good question to ask, though usually my questions are more about technical stuff. Generally I trust whatever he’s telling me to do. Just read your progesterone post – I agree!!! It’s the pits! I was so glad to skip it last month. I think it might also be a full moon tonight, so hopefully tomorrow will be better!

gozal: the suspense is killing me!!! Keeping my fingers crossed for you! Tonight was my last night of Femara…. I feel totally wiped out. Fighting the headache tonight and can feel the tightness in my neck, shoulders and face. Blech. Also, spacing out a bit at work – not sure if that’s related, but it’s definitely weird!

AFM: had a totally weird and rough day at work. I feel like I'm so far behind after a week out of the office! Hoping that I have a chance to catch up these next few days. Although monitoring on Thursday will be another 2 hour chunk gone. Can someone please make the meetings and appointments stop!?!? I know I just had some fun time in the sun, but I'm definitely counting down to our weekend away in the Berkshires .... a little QT for me and DH. Looking forward!

 

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#84 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 05:08 AM
 
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Hello Ladies!

 

I disappeared for a while, after having just shown my face for a bit.  Oops.  So, me:

 

Hope4Light: Name:Emms.  Age:31, DH 33.  TTC #2.   Trying Since: March 2011 (after PPAF came back) with severe MFI.  Plan for this Cycle:  Met with RE1 last week, meet with RE2 next week.  Then hopefully move forward with cycle testing and SA (all of our tests are from back in 2007/2008 when were were dealing with primary IF), and then onto IVF with ICSI.  Thoughts: Trying to stay positive and go into TTC #2 with a different attitude.  TTC #1 almost ruined me, and I refuse to let that happen again.

 

Since I originally joined back up to this board, I ended up getting a new position within my company and we moved 5 1/2 hours away.  This, of course, happened just a short time after finally meeting with 2 different RE's and trying to decide which to go with, donor sperm IUI or IVF again.  So, we had to start the new RE search all over again.  Met with the first last week and didn't really love her.  Meet with the second next week and we are hoping that we really like this one.  I apologize because I didn't read all back through the 5 pages, but I'll keep up better now smile.gif

 

CBAA - I had a cancelled IVF cycle due to hyperstim.  It sucked.  We skipped right to IVF, so I don't know about overstimming with any of the other treatments, but when that first cycle was cancelled was when I first joined MDC for the support. 

 

Shesaidboom - I had abnormal paps back in the late 90's early 00's.  Had to get a couple of colposcopies and then cryotherapy.  They never thought it affected my fertility, but the treatments were painful.  I hope that you never have one again!!



Me: 34, DH: 36, DD born 7/25/10 After 4 years of trying and failed IVF treatments (missing my angels).  IVF/ICSI worked this time! DS born 1/8/13!



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#85 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 06:23 AM
 
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I've had a bunch of abnormal Pap smears and colposcopies in the past. I've never had to have anything treated though because my Paps always went back to normal on their own. I've noticed the abnormal results usually happen during stressful times. The colposcopies are not fun though! I always make DH come with me to hold my hand, cause its too scary to do alone.

For those of you suffering from Femara headaches, I have a great yoga DVD called Yoga for Stress Relief: http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B000ICLRKW/ref=mp_s_a_1?qid=1328621458&sr=8-1
It has routines that help with all kinds of stuff like anxiety, digestion, back pain, insomnia, and headaches. I tried the headache one the other day and it's like magic! Some types of yoga have made headaches worse for me (especially if there are a lot of head down positions) but this routine made my headache disappear. By the way I've ordered the fertility yoga DVD that some of you recommended and I'm anxiously awaiting its arrival!

hope4light - welcome! Good luck finding a new RE.

Teresa - after the day I had yesterday I'm thinking I should change my nickname to the French word for "tears" instead of the word for "smile".

My panic attack happened because I had to present some stuff at a really important meeting with a bunch of big-shots. I intended to finish preparing the presentation yesterday morning because the meeting was right after lunch, but then my computer broke down and I spent the entire morning with IT people trying to fix it and didn't have time to get ready for the meeting. Also I couldn't find my boss so shortly before the meeting I started having a full blown panic attack complete with crying, shaking, hyperventilating and a complete shut down of my brain. Finally about 15 mins before the meeting I found my boss and told him that nothing was ready and that there was no way I could present anything in my current state. So my boss ended up having to improvise the entire presentation and meanwhile I was there trying to fight back tears and not always succeeding. Luckily most of the other participants were over the phone so they couldn't see me. Anyways my boss didn't say anything about it to me after because he is super awkward with these situations, but my boss's boss came to me after and said the meeting had gone well and I made a good recovery at the end (people started asking me questions and I had managed to calm down enough to act normally by then). When I left work I started crying again because I managed to disable my transit pass by doing something dumb, then I went to my therapist and spent an hour crying to her, then I went home and cried to DH all evening. What an exhausting day.

Me (32), married to DH (35)

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#86 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 08:36 AM
 
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Gozal & Marmo - I struggled with being present for my DS too. I know it  might be hard for those TTC #1 to understand, but sometimes I didn't even want to look at his baby pictures.  They always just seemed to remind of what I couldn't have.  I slipped into a depressed state and spent my days looking up IF stuff and before I knew it I hadn't spent any time with him.  One day it just kind of hit me that I wasting time with DS because I was upset over something that might never happen.  I realized that if having a baby was the only that would make me happy...then I probably didn't need to have one.  I don't know if that makes any sense, but that was my emotional rollers coaster.

 

Sourire - hug2.gif That certainly does sound like an exhausting day.  I'm so sorry that happen to you. 

 

cbaa -  That's does sound like a lot of follicles.  I think I would just be excited rather than worrying about over stim.  It's possible only the 14 mm will trigger.  Your numbers look good...you are just waiting to surge!

 

Hope - Welcome.  Finding a new Doctor is always a little bit scary and a lot of trouble.

 

Sila - Practice cramps...Too Funny.  I was rolling. 

 

Sourire - I'm not sure everyone wants to know, but since you asked I'll give a brief synopsis of my TTC #2 journey and the cycle that finally worked.   2.5 years, 3 doctors, low carb/excerise for a year losing nearly 20 lbs. (too the point of almost too thin.) , 3 clomid cycles, Metformin, 1 surgery for non-existent polyp, which revealed a blocked tube and endo, 2 monitored femara cycles. 

 

Cycle that worked -

Baselines -  20 antral follicles, FSH 7, E2 24

CD 5-9 - 7.5 mg (3 pills) femara

CD13 - Full blown positive on OPK

CD14 - 4 mature follicles, only 1 (20mm) on good tube side--  E2 232, P4 .06, 10,000 IU trigger shot

CD17 -  started Progesterone suppositories at night 200 mg

CD 21 - P4 37

CD 28 - Beta 189 - P4 55

 

 

I credit my Re for increasing my femara and DH bd'ing until he just didn't have anything left, but here is my list of Supplements

 

Metformin

Vitamin D3 - 5,000 IUs (3 months)- because Vitamin D deficiency is related to Insulin Resistance

Grapeseed extract/resveratol  - because it was in the vitamin D and I coun't find anything that said not to take it when TTC.  It apparently increased litter size in rats. (So, I figured why not)

 

Chromium - Iceland Heatlh Chromax 500 mcg, help with blood sugar/metabolism

 

MSM -(Methylsulfonylmethane) -  This normally comes with glucosamine & chondrotion.  I have lower back problems and I took it 2x a day with I got pregnant with DS.  It's the one thing that I did pre DS that I hadn't tired.  Glucosamine & Chondrotin do not go well with metformin (major GI issues).  So, I finally figured out I could just take the MSM.  It's a sulfur like the NAC. When I researched it I couldn't find anything about it helping with fertility except that dog & horse breeders use it.

 

Baby aspirin -

Centurm Prenatal - because I had a coupon for it. ;)

Epsom salt baths 3x week for magnesium -   because I read that magnesium deficiency and vitamin D deficiency are related.

Warm Water with Lemon in the A.M - because the making babies book recommended it for my type.

 

 


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#87 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 08:39 AM
 
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Sourire: funny, since "larmes" sort of sound like alarm and it definitely sounds like you had an alarming day yesterday. I'm so sorry that progesterone knocked you on your kiester. I hope all is right with the world today and that you're back up and at it again. Sometimes you just need a day to let it all out - stinks that it was on a day of a presentation, but you made it through!!!

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#88 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 09:24 AM
 
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gozal - Chart stalking and hoping for you... it's looking so good!!

 

shesaidboom - Ouchie ouch ouch ouch about getting your cervix pulled! I've suctioned my DivaCup to my cervix a few times, and holy hand grenades, that HURTS! Glad you're feeling optimistic about this cycle!!

 

cbaa - I hope you don't end up overstimming! I haven't done it, but I've heard it can be painful. So hopefully one or two keep getting bigger, and the rest calm down. I'm actually surprised that a lot of you ladies are triggered when you have 3-4 follicles that are somewhat big, because I'm pretty sure my RE wouldn't have done it out of fear of higher-order multiples. Also, question... what is NaPro? I've never heard of it until you mentioned it, I don't think. I hope you can just jump on the BFP bandwagon that seems to be starting and not have to worry about it!

 

krunchy - How are you doing? Have you had an ultrasound yet? I'm sure we'd all love an update!

 

Sourire - That is so sucky about your panic attack! I'm glad you were able to recover some before the end of the meeting, and that your boss's boss was pleased with the outcome.

 

Everybody else... wave.gif. Still praying for you ladies. I'm excited that we have some really hopeful-looking cycles this month. I'm hoping February becomes a BFP explosion around here. Consider it my birthday wish. winky.gif

 

AFM, mw visit last week was great, everything is going very well, and I'm really having fun telling more people. I still throw up every morning and still have some bad days now and then (like yesterday... ugh), but I'm making it.


Monkey (30) + Pirate (28) = a forever family (5/10) - Baby Bird (8/12), our long-awaited first, and one (9/13 @ 7w 6d); PCOS
*4***8***12***16***20***24***28***32**36***40** Oct 2014 - it's a
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#89 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 11:08 AM
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Wissa!!!!!!!joy.gif


Mom to DS 12/07 and DD 11/13, plus a bunch of chickens, dogs, and cats.

Moving past many years of infertility and always thinking of my friends in the infertility forums.

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#90 of 299 Old 02-07-2012, 11:14 AM
 
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I forgot to mention - I have about 40 internet cheapie OPKs I'd be more than happy to send one of you ladies for free, if it would be useful to any of you. Someone on the BSL thread sent me theirs after she got pregnant, and I ordered a bunch more when they ran out, figuring no way was I actually getting pregnant any time soon. For once, the universe actually laughed at me and decided to make that purchase useless to me in short order.

 

Also, I posted a ridiculously long, rambly update about my life on the grads thread, should anyone be interested. Speaking on the grads thread... shesaidboom, would you mind linking to the grads thread somewhere in the first post?


Monkey (30) + Pirate (28) = a forever family (5/10) - Baby Bird (8/12), our long-awaited first, and one (9/13 @ 7w 6d); PCOS
*4***8***12***16***20***24***28***32**36***40** Oct 2014 - it's a
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